back to article Florida cops taser naked old timer

Florida cops last Saturday administered a solid tasering to a 65-year-old man who decided to go for a naked wander through a Sarasota neighbourhood. Police mugshot of Duncan Kirk According to Tampa Bay Online, Duncan Kirk (right), of Bradenton, was spotted in his birthday suit about 7.30pm making his way through locals' back …


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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It'll be a 3-year-old next

    So the cops are now so fat on doughnuts they can't handle an unarmed 65-year-old without tasering him?

    I'm waiting for the story where a dozen armed policemen taser to death an unruly 3-year-old.

  2. Peter D'Hoye


    It's America - everything is possible.

    IMHO, tasering = torturing, the US once again shows they are some centuries behind....

  3. Ferry Boat


    Prowling (verb) - to go about stealthily

    If you are old and naked I don't think you can prowl. Anyway, is that a broken Monster Munch on his head?

  4. Rob
    Paris Hilton

    nudity vs violence

    oh come on people, everyone knows that in merkland nudity is equivalent to waving around an ak47 elsewhere in the world, and vice-versa.

    Paris, as she'd look good either way.

  5. Pat

    Coat required?

    [Quote] Kirk was charged with "prowling and resisting arrest with violence", and released on Sunday from Manatee County Jail after coughing $1,200 bail. [/Quote]

    I like to think I'm law-abiding but I think if I was going to be 'arrested with violence' I'd be tempted to resist.

    - I'll take the electrically-grounded coat please.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Arrest for nudity with violence, tasering, etc.

    Can someone remind me from where the story comes? I just can't decide whether the headline belongs with the Taliban or American cops.

  7. Andy S

    once again

    When are the Merkin cops going to actually start treating tasers as the "less than lethal" weapon that it is? Its time to start using tasers situations where the only other alternative is to shoot someone.

  8. Anonymous Coward

    Obviously, he might have had a hidden weapon. LOL.

    Tasers cause far more problems than they solve.

    Tasers are abused about 100:1 more often than they're used 'properly'.

    In Montreal, the AVERAGE number of officers at each tasering is SIX.

    Pain Compliance with a taser, being severe pain, is a clear violation of the prohibition against torture. This is the law of the land almost everywhere.


  9. Anne Bokma

    Hidden weapon?

    They must have smelled something ;)

  10. Bill Fresher

    @Anonymous Coward

    "So the cops are now so fat on doughnuts they can't handle an unarmed 65-year-old without tasering him?"

    I don't know about you but I wouldn't want to handle a naked 65 year old geezer.

  11. Anonymous Coward

    Britain shows how it SHOULD be done

    Taser a man in a coma. He must have been a massive threat. He would have probably drooled on them.


  12. Paul Johnson

    swinging a club

    give the cops some slack; clearly the guy was armed with wood

  13. Garth

    I can play the Ignorant Generalizations game too!

    Well I suppose tasering him isn't quite as humane as shooting him in the back of the head as he ran away.

    Maybe our guys to take some lessons from the Canadians, they seem more up on tasering techniques.

  14. Timmy!!!

    The Tasers aren't the problem

    It's not the tasers that are the problem. In fact, statistically, hitting someone with a taser is far less likely to cause injury than manhandling them or pepper spray (allergy to OC).

    It's the attitude of the police departments that's the problem. They treat it as the "push button situation" for ANY situation as opposed to evaluating what's going on and making a proper call. It’s a result of teaching the police officers that every citizen is their enemy so that they don’t feel bad for extracting additional tax revenue from them on a daily basis (parking tickets, red-light cameras, etc…).

    “Protect and serve”, my ass!!

    The worst ones IMHO are the ones where someone was tasered then let go without charges. There should be ABSOLUTELY NO CIRCUMSTANCE where charges are not justified but a tasering is.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ah hyuck hyuck!

    Merkins are stupid! Y'all talk lak thi-yus ayn yer lak them thar talibayan!

    Yes, we know that you're morally superior in Britain, and that we're stupid, fat, ignorant, worthless totalitarian war-mongers. We are aware that any single instance of tasering in a country of three hundred million people is proof positive that we cower under the relentless thud-thud-thud of the black helicopters, plodding between our workplaces and our sleep cubes, too terrified to even lift our heads lest the steel grasp of Uncle Sam squeeze the life from our veins.

    Clearly, I cannot argue with your logic. Therefore, you are free to return to being beaten by chavs in broad daylight under the watchful eye of omnipresent security cameras.

    And don't wear any bulky coats. It's getting on toward springtime.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    My back yard

    Being 65 doesn't make you a helpless old man, and if this old fart was stupid enough to try and ESCAPE from the cops and RESIST them he deserved it. There's nothing wrong with a taser you pussies. Would you rather they go back to the billy club?

    And when kids stop tasering themselves and laughing hysterically on youtube, perhaps any arguments about tasers = torture might hold some water, right now, I think you can all STFU.

    PS I live in bradenton and there are an absolute ton of psychopaths running around every day. In some of my companies stores, old "harmless" people just like this guy come in to our stores and masturbate in the dressing rooms!! If this senior citizen really was harmless, he shouldn't have ran, the cops would have figured something out for the poor bastard.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Actually, he WAS armed ...

    Indeed, he had TWO arms.

    But apart from that seems to have been 'arming nobody. Total misuse of an offensive weapon.

  18. Anonymous Coward

    @Anonymous Coward and Bill Fresher

    AC: "So the cops are now so fat on doughnuts they can't handle an unarmed 65-year-old without tasering him?"

    BF: I don't know about you but I wouldn't want to handle a naked 65 year old geezer.

    Oh come on, read the story you two! It makes it perfectly clear: the *real* problem is that cops are now so fat on doughnuts that they can't *run* as fast as a 65-year-old.

    Let alone handle him if they ever caught up.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    @My back yard

    "Being 65 doesn't make you a helpless old man"

    Good observation.

    Believe it or not kiddies there are 65 year old men quite capable of killing you with their bare hands. I could introduce you to a couple if you like. No? Maybe you should try moving beyond your comic book images of 'the elderly' and actually try something called 'thinking' once in a while.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Tasers safe?

    Some police departments classify a taser as a deadly weapon. Also the The ACLU and PERF recommend limits on Taser use on at-risk individuals. i.e. pregnant women and the elderly. According to Amnesty International since 2001 290 people in the US have died due to being tasered. Elderly, children and pregnant women are considered especially susceptible to dangerous side effects/death from tasers. Some police departments have in their "Taser Safety Handbooks" rules that for at-risk individuals tasers should only be used if there is a danger of physical damage, and specifically exclude their use on a fleeing suspect.

    Tests show tasers are safe? So they tested tasers on the elderly and pregnant women? I don't think so. They tested them on healthy individuals, and yet there are more cases every year of police tasering elderly and pregnant people. Tasers are considered very dangerous for those with cardiac or neurological problems. An elderly man running round naked looks like he'd fit one or both of these categories.

    In 2005 Policie Agencies brought a class action lawsuit against Taser International because they felt they had been misled about the safety of the devices. I don't think tasers should be taken away, I think the police should be retrained in their use and dangers. A police officer who is fully informed is going (I hope) to make better decisions than one who has been told this is a safe easy way of bringing down someone.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Ah hyuck hyuck!

    Nice one!

    Some of the people writing to these comment sections lately should be producing simple-minded crapfest action pics for Hollywood*. Their characterisations of Americans, cops etc. display a lack of depth that is often breathtaking.

    *'Hollywood' is used here as a generic term for the film industry. Gotta keep it simple for these idiots.

    Full disclosure: I'm a Canadian.

  22. Luther Blissett

    Home of the brave? Land of the free?

    A better story could not be invented to epitomize the State of the Onion in 2008 methinks.

    BTW, in Britain a merkin is a pubic wig. And no, we don't have policemen with hairy balls here any more either.

    // Mine's the Afghan coat

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Re: My back yard

    "And when kids stop tasering themselves and laughing hysterically on youtube, perhaps any arguments about tasers = torture might hold some water, right now, I think you can all STFU."

    Kids also do many other things that would normally only appear on Jackass or in a torture manual. Think Chinese/Idian burns,German snipes, sticking needles into fingers.

    It's called proving how tough you are. If it wasn't painful it wouldn't be tough.

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Ah hyuck hyuck!

    The idiots who think of Americans, cops, insert-name-of-group-here in such simple-minded terms are the Chavs of the ElReg demographic.

  25. Anonymous Coward


    I thought it said they'd TEASED a naked 65 yo ...

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    Its a Set Up!

    If a 70+ Year old is allowed to run for president and have his finger on the big red button then a 65 year old is allowed a good tasering.

    Its all about equality although i do smell a electoral plant here. Just look out for John (The Oven Chip) McCain and Ralph ( Lord Vader) Nader both sighting this as a example that old folk can still be extremely dangerous and bad to know.

    It will help reassure the electorate that they can still be as dangerous as them young uns! The lengths party supporters will go to for their candidates though is impressive.

  27. Eugene Goodrich

    Personal choice

    My best guess from the story is that the police showed up and _probably_ (and here I admit I am speculating) told the man that they were placing him under arrest, and to put his hands on his head, or behind his hairy naked flabby love handles, or to lay down on the ground (mind the gravel) or somesuch, and the man did not comply.

    If the man resisted in a manner that caused the police to fear for their safety (i.e. being punched, kicked, or so forth - things that can actually cause injury when one thinks about it) then what are the options available to the police? And who made the decision that the man should resist like this?

    Now, I haven't seen the video, so I don't know for sure that the guy wasn't already either obeying the police's orders, or trying his best to do so. I only have what the article says, which is (English parsing ambiguities notwithstanding) that the man was violently resisting arrest.

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    6 year old handcuffed. What next ??

    Bear in mind this is the USA we are talking of, land of the nutters. Few months back I saw piece on US news about a 6 year old handcuffed at school in florida because she misbehaved. Is it any wonder some of them go on shooting sprees ?. NO.

  29. Marco

    Violently resisting arrest?

    Oh, give me a break!

    What is wrong with America's police if two or more trained officers can't tackle a 65 year old naked man to the ground without a taser?

    Cops just love convenience as much as the next guy, and tasering someone is just so comfy compared to pinning someone to the ground using body force. That some might react to the taser a little harsher, well, that's just bad luck. Isn't it?

    And as long as there are no court rulings saying that an officer in a given situation used excessive force when he applied the taser, this will continue.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well, I think ...

    He's actually a rather attractive, masculine old geezer in my humble opinion.

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Think about the savings

    I support taser on will. After all most of of the time nothing happens so a death or two or hidden lingering health problems shouldn't be that much of an issue. And it'll probably be over whenever the sonic or visual stun weapons are deployed widescale. Think about it, all the law enforcers will be absolutely safe to make their work. They will be able to stun you to the floor as first measure, just in case. That way the suspect can't do anything to harm themselves either. Hell, why not a multidevice that does all three things at the same time!

    Plus you'll get huge savings in all sort of training courses law enforcement doesn't need. No common sense will be required by the cops. it will make their life easier since they won't have to be in a good physical shape either. And since they will all be non lethal, it'll be easy for them to respond with properly graded force.

    Of course it'd have to be illegal for the public to own any of these devices, or be serverely underpowered, or each dischange be thoroughly investigated and tracked by GPS. Because, you see, they have such a potential for abuse by any person.

    But rest in peace because most cops aren't persons anyway.

  32. Jesse

    @ 6 year old handcuffed. What next ??

    What's next, according to your ambulance-chasing comment, is wildly blowing things out of proportion in much the same fashion the police in the article did.


    The 6 year old had been handcuffed to provide a startle to the kid.

  33. heystoopid
    Paris Hilton


    New , rumor has it that the new motto for all the US State and City police forces is now "to abuse and terrorize all " , for if the US President in the new Union of the Soviet States of Amerika can ignore all laws of Congress with impunity so can they too ! After all it is a lead by example world we live in and a new century where the presidential war against his own people began on that fateful day in November 2000 , for previous to that day only the racial minorities suffered extensive abuse at their hands with impunity !

    Perhaps they have deep down desire to tase their own mother in law , their wife and all the annoying family relatives and everyone else they encounter at the same time !

  34. BitTwister


    > The 6 year old had been handcuffed to provide a startle to the kid.

    Ah, right. So *that's* OK then. Presumably the extra-naughty 6 year-olds are tasered since they'd obviously require a greater "startle", although I have to wonder at which point the clubbing or shooting would start. Maybe instead they should just be shackled to their school-chairs.

  35. lglethal Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    You all seem to have missed a point

    in the article (or deliberately chose to keep quiet on the fact), that the guy had been pepper-sprayed prior to being tasered and that the pepper spray had had no effect. i.e he was violent when they went to arrest him, they pepper sprayed him and he remained violent, so they tasered him.

    Don't really have a problem with that since they used pepper spray first. Anyone DUMB enough to keep trying to resist arrest after being hit by pepper spray deserves a few thousand volts (preferably administered via the testicles so that we can remove them from the gene pool - though admittedly with this guy were probably too late to stop him infecting the gene pool with his own pond scum).

    Ups to the cops for following CORRECT procedure.

  36. Sillyfellow

    tough cops

    hehe.. yeah, right!

    2 trained police officers couldn't take down a naked 65 year old man?.. even after he was pepper sprayed??

    come on.. i struggle to believe that. what kind of police officers are these?

    take a look at the old geezer's picture... really scary and dangerous looking, let's be serious!!

    how police are behaving with these tasers is simply unacceptable. it's just to easy and convenient for them..

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Don't tase me, bro

    I'm Canadian!

  38. tony trolle

    not that odd

    there is a episode of 'cops' in which someone was arrested for throwing a cheeseburger at his girlfriend/wife. But if you watch the show for a while you will notice the Tazer used sometimes and you think 'why?'. If they just whack it out (frnnn frnn) if front of a cameraman what happens when it not there ?

  39. Juliette Martens

    Ren & Stimpy

    "Being 65 doesn't make you a helpless old man, and if this old fart was stupid enough to try and ESCAPE from the cops and RESIST them he deserved it. "

    Ehm...the fact that he was roaming the streets naked wouldn't set any alarm bells ringing that he might be a thermos flask short of a picnic, and therefore should be handled with a bit more consideration than those who set out to cause trouble in full mental capacity?

    Then again, maybe where you are in Bradenton going au naturel in public is the done thing so I can see where the confusion arose.

    Penguins don't wear no stinkin' clothes either.

  40. Gordon

    Probably justified.

    For all anyone knows this man could be a 6'5" 250 lb ex-America football player. And the cops attending could have just happened to be 5'2, 120lbs ,and completely incapable of restraining this giant on PCP. Just because he's old, doesn't mean to say he's out-of-condition and doesn't mean to say he's not on drugs.

    Pepper-spray didn't work, which suggests either mental health, drugs or a very positive mental goal. As it IS he's in custody and nobody is seriously injured.

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