back to article Unimpressed Sheilas mock boy racers' todgers

A New South Wales road safety initiative, featuring a video in which females suggest that Down Under's boy racers are somewhat lacking in the trouser department, has been hailed as "one of the state's most successful anti-speeding campaigns" according to the Sydney Morning Herald. A still from the "Speeding. No one thinks big …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    Its all about the speed!

    My pinkie's quicker than yours!

  2. Iain Porter
    Joke

    Idiots.

    Don't they realise the only way to slow motorists down is enormous numbers of cameras?

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    You think they're bad in NSW

    Here in maidstone the place is populated by individuals with enormous... spoilers, fake supercharger blowers, and other "2 fast 2 furious" adornments which are essentially just a way for them to oversize their ego to compensate for their lack of family jewelry.

    The insecure male is a most amusing animal to watch, especially when they try and fight you for laughing at their completely over the top behavior.

    And then get the smack down laid on them by someone who used to fight for real. (boxing)

    I must say, this advert could do with a few showings over here too. It seems to be an ideal way of telling these guys just how pathetic they are.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    how about

    the results are good, less deaths is always good.

    but did they have to do it in such a way to attack the male ego?

    im sure there would be complaints if there where adverts against binge drinking that showed guys calling women who are drunk sluts.

  5. Jason Harvey
    Thumb Up

    heh... they should do that here in the states!

    the more ego checking the better I say!

    I like my old boat that I drive around. sucks gas, but nobody argues with a big steel bumper when I'm "just doing the speed limit" instead of speeding 10+ over like a lot of these fools.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Erm...

    What happens then if you HAVE got a small pinkie?

    Excluding me of course - these glasses do WONDERS)

  7. Peter Ford
    Joke

    The fastest car in the world ...

    ... is a rental

    I was on holiday in NSW last month - there are billboards up all over with the same message.

    Seems to be working too: never known so many slow b******ds on the roads. Maybe that's where they got the 'Wales' bit from? (try driving the A5 to Anglesey and you'll see what I mean)

    Plus, the guys there seem to think that a good car is a loud car (and vice-versa) so huge engine, race car exhaust, sorted...

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    But I thought...

    ... that all the aussies had diminutive "pinkies" - wasn't that the point of a penile colony?

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: especially when they try and fight you

    Yes, because beating someone up in the street is so much better for your ego and much more demonstrative of your enormous tackle than having a load of stuff stuck on your car.

    Being a violent moron is also the mark of a sad dickless tosser.

  10. Steve Evans
    Flame

    Speeding?

    Trouble is, apart from the guy not stopping for the crossing, I don't think anyone else was really speeding, infact the guy at the beginning was just spinning on the spot!

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    That's odd

    I always thought the reason for boy racers was they couldn't stop their hamptons weighing down the accelerator pedal. Maybe things are different "down under".

  12. Rod Giles
    Happy

    Why bother?

    Why have a successful speed reduction campaign when you can reduce the speed limit to 20 mph in towns and collect all those lovely speeding fines?

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    where can truck-mounted big screens be rented, and how much are they?

    Then it can be parked, playing this video on a loop, outside the local Subaru dealers, the "kruizing" venues, the tune up shops, etc... Please?

  14. Rick Brasche
    Thumb Up

    oh, we sooo need this in California

    they need a version of this in California, to slow down the fart cannon, big winged ricer racers. But can it be done without being ridiculously politically correct, where they make sure to *not* include the worst offenders, big rim riding gangsters, pasty asian boys, tatooed hispanics? Or only show the scrawny wannabe "Eminem" style white boy ripping around?

    I wouldn't mind a motorcycle version of this. Squids making us respectable riders look bad.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    As an Old Codger......

    ...........I can confirm that the reverse isn't true.

    I drive slowly & carefully, but the pink 'un is still diminutive.

  16. Anonymous

    Male bashing is not the answer

    @ AC 18:54

    Who's to say that drivers who drive fast are "insecure males"? Some people (men mostly, not I though) are in possession of good spatial minds that allows them to drive fast. They should be allowed use this ability if they so wish.

    I think the ad campaign is totally idiotic though. Huge numbers of men die on roads and I do not it should be turned into a sexual inferiority complex joke. It's just needless bashing of men (already a prevalent trend in advertising) which will <b>not</b> help save lives.

    "The gesture is used in youth culture to indicate a small penis."

    The ad also asks girls to mimick the behaviour displayed on the ad. There's only one word for all of this: misandry.

  17. Rose
    Flame

    Re: Male Bashing

    "Some people (men mostly, not I though) are in possession of good spatial minds that allows them to drive fast. "

    That sentence rates a 10.5 on the WTFometer.

    Signed a female with good spatial orientation, who has seen people killed by idiots who don't understand that there's a limit to the speed messages travel through the neurons, and the further apart said neurons are, the worse the reaction time.

  18. Tim Spence
    Joke

    Size is no matter

    Well endowed or not, there's no denying these guys are good at burning rubber.

    Remember, it's not the size that counts...

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    re: But I thought...

    A "Penile Colony" is used to attempt to grow, or enlarge a currently existing one. What country had such a small collective dick that they needed one?

  20. Morely Dotes
    Flame

    @ anonymous

    "I think the ad campaign is totally idiotic though. Huge numbers of men die on roads and I do not it should be turned into a sexual inferiority complex joke"

    If you think that driving dangerously proves you're bright and well-hung, you *are* inferior - both in the mental and tackle categories. Dickless wonders die from driving too fast, and from driving under the influence (and often from both at once). if it were only themselves at risk, I'd say let them die - but they usually take innocents with them. But they *are* sexually inferior.

    In my experience (12 years driving in Germany, France, and Switzerland, 3 in Central America, and well over 30 all over North America), the people least capable of driving *well* at high speeds are the ones most likely to insist they should be allowed to do so.

    Also, the louder the car, the less likely the driver is capable of making important critical judgments (and the more desperate to prove his "manhood" he seems).

  21. Les Matthew

    @Ron Hughes

    "I drive slowly & carefully, but the pink 'un is still diminutive."

    Ron, the "Post anonymously" check-box is there for a reason. ;)

  22. lglethal Silver badge
    Stop

    @ Anon Cowards

    Its a well documented fact that the VAST majority of deaths caused by speeding (i believe its around 75% here in Aus) are young males 16-25. Therefore to call this a sexist & biased ad campaign is ridiculous! The facts support the need to focus on this one group!

    I mean by your reasoning any campaign to deal with say Breast Cancer should be targeted at both Men & Women of all ages including children because otherwise your being biased/sexist. Even though the facts show 95% of Breast Cancer cases occur in women of a certain age group. Maybe Testicular Cancer campaigns should be focused on helping women sufferers as well? Idiot...

    Personally, i normally wouldnt care if some young small d*cked wanker kills himself (i consider it darwinian selection!) but most of these crashers involve taking out other people as well. And what right do they have to put me and the rest of the public at risk?

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Driving...

    A mate of mine is want to say that yer 'thingy' is disproportionate to the size of the vehicle you drive... im inclined to agree.. , I cant afford a car presently ...(it'd make things easier for work Etcetera- but I aint that bothered in spending thousands '£' per year and leaving me up to my ears in debt.. )..(by the way I way I walk the 3 mile to work and back at present), and I aint ever had a complaint within the 'packaging department' - so maybe she is right :)

    getting me 'parka' - im off!

  24. Jon Tocker

    Totally support those adverts

    Once again, the Aussies succeed in getting the message across while our adverts fail to do so.

    Group of fellow bikers and I used to meet up on Te Rapa Straight (renowned boi racer hangout) of a Friday night and watch the posturing and posing and attrocious driving of the loons. We'd ride our bikes sensibly and sedately - despite the fact that most of our machines, including the 250cc ones, would leave those blinged-out wankmobiles in the dust if we were so inclined - park up and yak about motorbikes and watch the small-tackle brigade trying to Tokyo-Drift themselves around the nearby busy roundabout.

    Worst thing was: the little retards used to spill diesel on the roundabout to assist in drifting (because their driving skills aren't even up to putting a car INTO a drift, let alone controlling it when in one.)

    Lots of fun when you have some soft-cock blatting up and down the road in an illegally-lowered Subaru with a trash can where the exhaust pipe is supposed to be and some bloke on a GSXR1000 or other high performance bike quietly showing the local shielas that he has no need "prove" anything.

    One of our semi-regular attendees actually has his racing numbers on his bike as he loves to attain the fastest speeds he can - and, after unbolting the things likely to cause problems on the track, he does so any time he can get to a track event. Afterwards he bolts all the road-kit back on his bike and rides home responsibly. His bike is one of the aforementioned 250s that could leave any overly noisy Subaru or similar "hair-dresser's car" far behind should he choose to do so (it's called "power-to-weight ratio" and that's a high-performance engine in that leetle motorcycle frame) but where's the challenge in beating a poxy blinged-out cage driven by some inexperienced retard when you routinely compete with far faster vehicles ridden by people who know what they're doing?

    Riding/driving at speed's fine - when done under the appropriate controlled conditions of an approved track. The wankers endangering lives on the road with their reckless behaviour are useless wannabes who would never survive on a race track. Those who can and do survive on the track tend to drive more responsibly on the road - not always, but most the time.

    As with the "squid" variety of motorcyclist: it's the talentless wankers that feel the Need 2 Speed, those of us who know what we're doing and actually can ride/drive at speed don't feel the need to do so on the open road.

  25. Simon Harvey
    Thumb Up

    @Anonymous Cowards @lglethal

    Onya lglethal.

    Having lived here for 3 years, i can agree that the hoons down under are absolute fckwits who don't have any common sense. And - given that most of them are young males aged 16-25 who "know better" than everyone else, the only thing that they will listen to is usually young female hotties.

    Fully agree that Darwinian Selection comes into play - if they want to kill themselves thats fine. But If it saves even only one (innocent) life then it's money well spent.

  26. Stephen
    Go

    @ lglethal

    But it's worth remembering that "the VAST majority of deaths caused by speeding" are actually not caused by speeding at all but rather by inattention and lack of skill. In the last stats I saw for Australia exceeding the speed limit was the cause of the accident in only 3% of cases as opposed to inattention which was cited as the major cause in about 45%. Of course speed cameras don't see where you're looking...

    Add to that there is no way of really determining the speed the crash occurred at (the accident investigation tables are a farce dating back to the 1960s) it's up to the investigating officers to essentially tick a box on a form on what they think caused it. Very scientific and statistically valid I'm sure.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    Watch out for

    suicidal older guys who barely even can feel their dicks they have money for fast cars and are just as lousy at driving they want to die and they want to take you with them.

  28. Michael Hitchins
    Flame

    youtube replies are funnier

    The official ad is here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hWxU_ICoHM - and the replies are entertaining and at least should be seen just for a laugh. Also while you're there look at the 'heaven and hell' ads, there’s 3 of them in a series. I thought that was better really.

    Reading the comments here, its interesting. Everyone thinks that people doing this on the street are pin pricks endangering lives for their amusement, but it misses a critical question, why are they doing it on the streets in the first place? Maybe they could spend the money on providing more facilities to do it off the streets rather than bitch about the drivers who do it the only places they can.

    For us at least its $600/hr plus $60 miscellaneous fees per track outing for say drifting, and then limited to during the week only availability... you pretty much limit most working people to the streets or nothing, and historically prohibition has never worked - and the argument against it has been they shouldn’t do it just because you don’t like it, or cite safety concerns when more accidents are primarily caused by inattention rather than 'hero' driving let alone actual 'track like' driving.

    Speeding is a factor in a lot of crashes, but if you're being inattentive it suggests you're not paying attention to your speed either... Don’t blame speed just because its bundled with most crashes, its like saying just because computers where involved in every computer virus the computer is the problem. Its selective and surely peddled because you can quantify and therefore fine people for it, unlike the more dangerous behaviours.

    The idea of getting this behaviour off the street, I support it. Their methodology however I believe is flawed in the extreme and until they stop peddling ads and provide facilities the streets will be the status quo.

  29. Scott
    Alert

    If you can't handle the heat

    Man what a bunch of whiny posters we have on today.

    If a random ad targeting a group, that you have some resemblance to, makes a innuendo about the size of your wedding tackle and you get offended I'm sorry but I'm guessing that all the chicks laughing when you drop your pants has given you a complex

    There are guys out there who engage in reckless behavior to prove what a man they are. This ad is targeting them. If you aren't one of these people there is nothing to get upset about and if you are maybe you should take a step back and look at your actions

  30. The Aussie Paradox
    Alert

    @Scott - If you can't handle the heat.

    Scott,

    While I agree with you, speeding is reckless behavior and something should be done to stop it, but, if any other group were targeted (Skin colour, religion, female, etc, etc) then there would be an uproar that would rival the Rodney King incident, but because it involves white males, then it is ok. What ever happened to equality? Did they forget the word equal is in there?

    I am sorry if people think that white males are thick skinned and have to tough out the abuse, but the world is a sorry place.

    And yes, the poor souls who are endowed with the small pinky, can they sue the governement for the advertising campaign?

    /high horse.

  31. Steve Roper
    Flame

    Ah, the sweet smell of feminism!

    @ Scott and the others who spotted the sexism in these ads:

    Australia is one of those countries that succumbed to feminism year ago. The word "equal" only means "the same" if you're not a white male. Somebody pointed out above that if ads were made against binge drinking where guys called girls sluts there'd be an outcry, and they're absolutely right. The EO Commission would come down on that like a ton a bricks right after its first airing. After all, under the Australian definition of "equal", it's illegal to disparage women, but not so for men. There have been many adverts here that disparage men in some way, and even though the EOC may get hundreds of complaints they never do anything about it. But when some daring ad company releases an ad that disparages women it takes only ONE complaint to ban it! Not surprising, considering all the EO Commissioners for the last 20 years have been feminist bull-dykes with a pathological hatred of the male sex.

    Given the social attitude towards men that has prevailed in this country, it's small wonder I've refused consistently to have kids or even engage in sexual relationships. It's just not worth it - ALL of my male friends who have been in relationships have copped the rough end of the stick when the woman dumps them. The law is on the women's side.

    So these ads don't surprise me in the least. They're just one more facet of the misandry that has infected our government and our country.

    OK, feminists. I've got my asbestos coat on. Have at it!

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    speed doesn't cause accidents, it makes them lethal

    re "worth remembering that "the VAST majority of deaths caused by speeding" are actually not caused by speeding at all but rather by inattention and lack of skill."

    The CAUSE of an accident may well have nothing to do with speed. Running into someone due to inattention at 5km/h is unlikely to be lethal. Running into them at 95km/h is far more likely.

    Same accident, same cause, add speed == lethality.

    Would love to see those ads over here in Western Australia!

  33. Scott

    @ @me

    I understand your point about the racism/sexism in the ads and I do agree with your point in some regards. But as it has been stated before all ads are targeted to a specific demographic be that gender, age, race, wealth or some other factor

    When you start using lines like "the misandry that has infected our government and our country" you are moving the conversation from the ad to a country wide issue that, at least in my eyes, is a separate issue in which I think we would have similar opinion.

    As for the "slut" defense. The small pinkie gesture is not very insulting, how many of you have never used the a variation of the phrase "Don't be such a girl/pussy" or "You don't have the balls to do that" with your mates.

    Compare that to the number of you who would call a female friend a slut to her face.

    If somebody said I had a small dick and expected me to be offended I would assume they were try to compensate for something

  34. AndyB
    Go

    I still don't understand.....

    how some little prick driving around in a 1.2 Corsa with bastardised bodywork, a zonking great tailpipe and little blue lights everywhere doesn't already know that this shouts, louder than anything, "Caution, dickless wanker on board"

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: Steve Roper

    Of course, your lack of sex has nothing to do with comments such as "feminist bull-dykes with a pathological hatred of the male sex".

    An advert like this associates bad driving with the insinuation of a small winky, considering the majority of Australians are white, it isn't too much of a leap to see why they're the targets. Of course, the target audience is also selected based on statistics. It would be discriminatory to target only women for drinking unless there's clear evidence that women are the worst offenders. I don't think there would be the same problem if at the same time, an advert aired targetting men. The problem is, that a lot of the time, adverts that feature minorities fall back on stereotypes of that race, rather than actually showing a true picture. Eg. I'd be interested in Aussie views on Aboriginees from the posters in this thread. The majority opinion of the people I've met has been that they are wastes of space, thieves, vandals, steal jobs, etc. Whereas the truth is that the initial settlers introduced them to alcohol, tobacco and drugs, which they already had a low tolerance of. Discuss.

  36. Mark Johnson

    Double standards

    I'm sure if they made an advert where they took the piss out of women with small tits there would be outcry. In my experience, boy racers come in all shapes and sizes, but they usually have fat girlfirends.

    For the record, I don't generally speed and I have a massive cock.

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not an attack on the 'male ego'

    Actually it's quite complimentary to me. I drive a 1 litre hatchback (with no modifications), carefully and within the speed limit. I must be hung like a horse :) This is an attack on the egos of a small subset of men who have overinflated egos.

    I think it's perfectly appropriate to attack egos when you're trying to dissuade people from doing something inadvisable just to bolster their egos in the first place. There's nothing wrong with driving fast - that's what track days are for - there's just no need to do it on the High Street where you might kill someone and let's face it, the truth is you'll impress nobody. Most peoples' response is some form of pinkie wiggling anyway so this is really just a heads up to the drivers.

    The only issue I suppose is that this doesn't really do much to knock the egos of 'girl racers' ... but then they're far rarer anyway. Maybe someone will come up with something, if they're really a significant problem.

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Slow news day

    Am I the only one who saw this on the BBC months ago?

    For the record though, I thought it was a pretty good attempt at getting through. Even found myself waving my pinkie at some dickhead in an X5 that went zooming past me. Cos lets face it, anyone with an X5 had NO dick whatsoever!

  39. David S
    IT Angle

    Speed (velocity) IS a factor.

    Ultimately, it comes down to inertia and (critically) energy. Where an accident involves a moving vehicle, the damage caused in the accident (how "lethal" the accident is) depends mostly on the kinetic energy being transmitted, and while this rises in proportion to the mass of the moving vehicle, it rises in proportion to the _square_ of its velocity. That's GCSE physics, by the way. For those of you who weren't paying attention.

    This ad isn't targeting white males; if it were, I'd feel targetted, and I certainly don't. It's targetting the idiots who try to compensate for their inferiority complexes by behaving in a reckless manner, and hence endangering other, innocent road users and bystanders. Driving under the influence of a severe psychological dysfunction, so to speak*. I'm not sure lining hotties up to mock their tackle would be considered an effective treatment for their underlying mental / emotional ills, but if it has a positive impact in the practical, real world then who are we to judge?

    By the way, I'm a strong believer that a gentleman's sexual abilities are in inverse proportion to the size of the vehicle he drives. But then, I'm biased; I commute by push-bike.

    *Driving while being a dickhead, as it ought to appear in the statute books...

  40. james marley
    Coat

    I demand a recount...

    "For the record though, I thought it was a pretty good attempt at getting through. Even found myself waving my pinkie at some dickhead in an X5 that went zooming past me. Cos lets face it, anyone with an X5 had NO dick whatsoever!"

    I think you will find that there is always a dick in an X5.

    Anyone seen my coat

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Bloke

    gets himself a Ferrari, does the brmm brmm thing in the car park. His mate comes up to him -

    bloke's mate: "big car, little willy."

    bloke: "if you've got a car like this, you don't need a willy."

    Ford Pop, the red one please...

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Er...

    "some bloke on a GSXR1000 or other high performance bike quietly showing the local shielas that he has no need "prove" anything."

    Hence the high performance bike, obviously.

  43. Jon Tocker

    @ Michael Hitchins

    "Maybe they could spend the money on providing more facilities to do it off the streets rather than bitch about the drivers who do it the only places they can."

    Bollocks.

    The streets are not the "only places" they can do it.

    Around here there are plenty of proper tracks that open up to all comers - speedway, drags, motorcycle speedway and motocross - all within 4 hour's sane rational drive, most a lot closer.

    Funnily enough, none of the wankers I've seen in the blinged-out hairdresser cars ever turn up to the car tracks and try their "mad skillz" out on a proper circuit - same as none of the squids turn up at the bike tracks.

    They know full well down inside that they are all talk and no "walk" and that their pimped-out pus-buckets and their driving "skills" wouldn't cut it in the real deal. So instead they hoon around the city risking the lives of anyone else on the road.

    As I said, I know those who really do race, for whom it is a passion - and they turn up to the race meets. They practise and they learn from the more experienced riders/drivers. The boi-racers are nowhere in that league. Fuck, they don't know what way the peak of a hat is supposed to point or how to pull their trousers up, much less anything about competitive driving.

    They "drag each other off" at the lights in town because there's no way they have the vehicle or skills to come close to the average standing quarter times at Meremere drag strip They "race through the streets" because they don't have to have the skills to control a vehicle at the sort of speeds expected at a proper speedway event.

    We invest billions of dollars into having a speedway track in every suburb and have them open to the public 24/7 - the wankers still wouldn't show.

    If they had what it took, they'd already be doing it and they wouldn't be wasting their time with the other losers pouring diesel on corners.

  44. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @james marley

    >Cos lets face it, anyone with an X5 had NO dick whatsoever!"

    >I think you will find that there is always a dick in an X5.

    So they don't have one, but there's always one there...Has it been severed?

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Black Helicopters

    Speed is fine in the right places!

    Where as I agree with the advert, that there are far too many idiots on the roadds, I do have to say, that a lot of the "high speed" accidents happen due to poor government policies.

    If you look at Germany, even though they are the only country left with no speed limit (something, that I really enjoy every time I go there...) they still have the lowest high speed accident rate.

    But this is due to mostly training the new drivers properly.

    Here in the UK, before you do your driving test, you are not permitted to drive on the motorway, but how on earth are you supposed to learn to handle your car when driver a bit faster.

    In Germany it is an obligation, that you drive for a min. of three hours on the motorway before you are even considered for the driving test.

    What has to happen, is that the youngster learn to control their testosterone and rather get rid of it using their hand, rather than their foot on the accelerator.

    And don't get me wrong: I do think, that this advert is great and they should continue with it, but I also think, that I should be able to drive fast, if conditions allow me to do so.

  46. Tim Bates

    Tiny condoms....

    Forget the pinky ad... The "tiny condoms" one is HEAPS better done, and way funnier.

    Also, the RTA still don't get it. None of the content had anything to do with speeding, so the tagline at the end is really stupid.

  47. David S

    And another thing...

    In Northern Ireland (where I learned to drive) a new driver has a "restricted" status (an orange "R" on the reverse of the "L" plate) and is allowed to drive on their own, as one would expect, but must keep their speed below a maximum of 45 mph, obviously while obeying other speed limits.

    An eminently sensible policy, I thought, and one which I feel should have been adopted throughout the UK. But then, what do I know?

  48. Anonymous John

    If anyone is upset by that gesture,

    how do they cope with all the spam they get making the same accusation?

  49. Jack
    Alert

    Already here

    As far as I was aware, we already have a thing similar to this in the UK. See a person driving like a prat and we make a gesture, although instead of waving the pinkie we tend to wave the entire hand up and down in a cupped position...

    David S wrote:

    "In Northern Ireland (where I learned to drive) a new driver has a "restricted" status (an orange "R" on the reverse of the "L" plate) and is allowed to drive on their own, as one would expect, but must keep their speed below a maximum of 45 mph, obviously while obeying other speed limits."

    I'm assuming you have decent measures to stop these drivers from getting on motorways then? One car doing 45mph when all around it are doing ~70 is just as dangerous (if not more so) than one car doing 95mph.

  50. Simon Ward

    Re: Speed is fine in the right places!

    "Here in the UK, before you do your driving test, you are not permitted to drive on the motorway, but how on earth are you supposed to learn to handle your car when driver a bit faster."

    "Motorway standard" roads - most places will be in easy driving distance of at least one (the A64 southern York bypass is the dragstrip of choice in these parts) and any driving instructor worth their salt will have their pupils out on them for several lessons as soon as they're able. Given that the driving test requirements involve driving on at least one stretch of 'major' road (for a given value of 'major') this is a good thing.

    Having recently passed my test at the ripe old age of 36, I can honestly say that I felt safer driving on the major roads, the A1 included, than I did pottering around the 'burbs doing manoeuvres and so forth, and York certainly seems to be over-endowed with spotty little scrunts in clapped out Novas and Saxos with wanker-pipe exhausts and extremely poor taste in music.

  51. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    Forget the "pinkie" - hit the little sods with extreme punishment!

    Every day I travel too and from work (in Dundee) I have to take preventative/reactive measures to prevent ending up in an accident 'cause some brainless little yob (male or female) thinks they're "F1" material. Quite frankly, I'm getting sick of it. The ad says to "flip them the pinkie" - wow. The law says take away the licence - big deal. You've removed the legal right to drive, but not taken away the physical ability to drive. Remove the ability - PERMANENTLY* - and within a year of Britains courts upholding the punishment, the roads will be safer than they've ever been.

    Every time one of these little gits takes to the road, they play with the lives of all who use streets. People complain about mums doing the school run with one kid wrapped up inside a 4x4: travelling the 1 mile to school. Is it any wonder? If your kid has to walk a mile to and from school would you want them walking along the pavement when there are brainless numpties trying to perfect their "drift" or drag racing on the same streets?

    *The form of "permanencey" to be decided by the Gov.t.

    extreme? - maybe, but let's stop poo-poohing thier egos and make then realise that driving is a privilidge and not a right.

  52. Anonymous Coward
    Alert

    Big one...

    I've got a really fast car and a really big 'un of my own "down under".

    Maybe these girls are suggesting I have a small little finger.

    WHOA! I have too!

  53. Adam Capps

    When asked what Noel Coward thought about Australians

    .... He replied "Rabbits and convicts."

    Ok so while that might be true - it is also highly fascinating how they are so easily controlled by an advert that insinuates a man's member is small because he speeds, that said it is indeed a masterful piece of marketing by the Ozzies.

    Isn't it sad that it is nearly all men who are targeted (despite the seeing many girl racers) and how it is once again using sex in a negative way to control people (men). Well they are Ozzies so one might be forgiven for daring to point out that the PC engine needs oiling. Female binge drinking is ever on the increase and the urgency for absolute female equality seems key here - however - where are the ads for the girls? Why not have a male and female advert - bet I could think of a few ;-)

    How would it work with the girls? Fried eggs? Nat bits? I think the effect would be lost somewhat.

    Just my opinion.

  54. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    a more effective campaign

    I think a more effective campaign would be one that showed live feeds of businessmen with their BMW's, Teenagers with their Corsas, and Ancient people with their Honda's getting their penises/breasts chopped off when caught more than 15 miles over the speed limit.

    Obviously, the gruesome act will upset some. I bet it will stop more people from speeding.

  55. Matthew
    Flame

    Emasculation and rugby

    Am I really the only person here to wonder if this campaign might be linked to the decline in Australia's sporting prowess?

  56. Jon Tocker

    @ Er... By Anonymous Coward

    (Posted Wednesday 17th October 2007 09:05 GMT)

    Quoting me: "some bloke on a GSXR1000 or other high performance bike quietly showing the local shielas that he has no need "prove" anything."

    Anon: Hence the high performance bike, obviously.

    -------------------------

    Yes, it's an absolute crotch rocket and goes like a demon... On the track, where he rides it on track days.

    Hence having no need to show off to a pack of losers on a public street despite the fact he has both the machine and the riding skills to leave the tosspots in the dust. (Hell, the bloke on the 250 has the skills and machine to leave the wankers in the dust).

    Me, I opted for a small, light 225cc enduro bike so I can have fun mucking about off-road on the weekends (I can pick it up easily when I drop it on the trail). It's a matter of "horses for courses" - the GSXR1000 is great for some track events, the CBR250R is great for others and my XT is great for what I like to do.

    My XT's quite capable of exceeding the speed limit, especially in town, and its power-to-weight ratio is such that it could leave the boi-racers' hairdresser cars in the dust, but I choose not to do either of those things.

    I have respect for myself, my family, my bike and the rights of others on the road.

    My uncle drives in rallies, my father used to race midget class racers and over the years I've known a number of people involved in drag racing and speedway - and they don't seek to "prove" their abilities on public streets and roads.

    That's left for the wannabes with no respect, no skills and poofy cars.

  57. Michael Hitchins
    Heart

    Re: Jon Tocker

    I was referring to where I live, where we have one international drag strip, on national raceway, one circuit and skidpad driver training facility and one ordinary old raceway. Thats for an estimated population of 2 million people, in a state that covers 2.5 million square kilometers. Thats enough to fit the UK (where i assume your viewpoint is from) in over ten times! I quoted the figured I have to pay to get on the track, something I know as a volunteer official and trying to practice drift racer. While in the UK you might have a lot of facilities developed due to a larger population and better planning we dont. Yet we are the ones getting these ads shown to us from our tax money. ( well to be fair we have different ads being run here in WA, but they are of a similar calibre).

    While the drags do run weekly 'open' events (though you cant run your street car if it goes too quick, 130mph terminal speed or 10.99 seconds and under, though it is your street car...) which are popular and I believe have curbed street racing, what I have said about the tracks stands true. The fact that they are booked out 6 months + in advance and require large sums of cash to get an event together limit things a bit. Every track event run at our only 'good' track requires you to purchase a CAMS license and a track membership, good for 1 year, so there is another $300.

    So the average hoon boy racer needs to have some spare cash and a club thats well organised over here to get on the track. Or at least for drifting they could rock up to the once a month practice days, join the over subscribed queues and for their $55 get maybe 15 minutes on track, if they dont get kicked off because they came off too many times in one group of laps. good way to spend from 6 to 10pm on a friday night if you like to watch drift at least. The professionals have their own lane they get cycled through and generally get twice as much track time as boy racer, at least they are showy.

    The skid pan at the other facility is reserved for motokhana and some instructor led driver training and is strictly bookings only. They are even more strict about who gets to go on their circuit. Booking the pad and doing something other than motorkhana can lead to getting kicked out, depending on the staff on the day, luckily though they arent breathing down your neck about CAMS.

    Now if you just want to have some fun, maybe practice slides or do whatever else it is you want to do on the street you cant (big shock, not everyones wants to race competitvely on the track, seriously... you claim they dont turn up, maybe they dont share the passion for prim and proper racing, they might want to have fun). Free form driving will get you kicked out of any track facility here and I bet it would there too. Most arguments about facilities seem to think that everyone wants a track and to go really fast around it because thats what the professionals do. That isnt what everyone wants to do, maybe they want to test their car, do some burnouts or challenge a friend to some cornering.

    My suggestion would be to lay down some big sections of tarmac interlinked together to form a circuit or seperate for people as required. Then have fee per hour use then go here is a section of tarmac, go for it. Gets them off the street and saves innocent lives. I can think of plenty of reasons why this wouldnt happen though, and that I find is really disappointing. Its the kind of facility that mimics what they do now and just moves it off the street. It would be almost equivilant to you pay to use this section of tarmac and you are free of persecution, that is all the payment gives you and as far as the owners responsibilies go.

    Of course reading your post you might be complaining about the kids who cruise around playing doof doof and generally doing the stop start drive around in a group thing. I wouldnt exactly call their behaviour hooning or dangerous, just funny. Naturally you wont see them on any track but if you put a car park off the facility i mentioned maybe they'd all congregate there :P

  58. Jon Tocker

    @ Michael Hitchins v.2.0

    Actually, Michael, I'm a fair bit closer than the UK - I'm in NZ, but be that as it may...

    "Now if you just want to have some fun, maybe practice slides or do whatever else it is you want to do on the street you cant (big shock, not everyones wants to race competitvely on the track, seriously... you claim they dont turn up, maybe they dont share the passion for prim and proper racing, they might want to have fun)."

    So risking the lives of other people due to careless driving is "fun" - or it being "fun" mitigates the fact that it's bloody dangerous and they're risking the lives and limbs of other road users? (Notice I'm not carping on about speed as the speed they're doing is only one factor out of many dangerous driving issues).

    They seem to want to "race competitively" on the streets where they can kill or injure pedestrians or other road users. If they aren't into "prim and proper racing" then they can stop *pretending* to be "kool-az racerz" and ride sensibly on a road they are supposed to share with other road users.

    "Of course reading your post you might be complaining about the kids who cruise around playing doof doof and generally doing the stop start drive around in a group thing."

    So you missed the references to drag racing in the streets, endangering other people's lives and pouring diesel on the roads.

    My beef is with those cornering at excessive speed, drifting, pouring lubricants on busy intersections, doing burnouts, "do'nuts", hand brake slides, drifts and other things that endanger the lives of other road users. Large amounts of alcohol and drugs also factor into it, as do illegally (and dangerously) modified cars.

    So, we have drunk, stoned yoofs hooning around the local roundabout - on which they have poured diesel - in unwarranted cars with chopped suspension springs. In other words: dangerous retarded wastes of oxygen.

    My beef is with wankers ripping up the handbrake in front of me, sliding sideways into a side street and then spinning themselves around to erupt out of the street again. Admittedly, I'm an experienced rider and was in no danger - but others are not as experienced as I am. Others who are likely to have hit the car as it skidded across the lane and around the corner, or been hit *by* it is it came flying out again.

    Funnily enough, those retards in the car didn't check with me first to ensure I had sufficient riding skills to cope with their behaviour before ripping up the hand brake.

    Go on, defend the dickheads all you like, write off dangerous driving as "just a bit of fun" - then try and explain it to the family and friends of those who're killed or seriously injured by these dicks or as a consequence of encountering diesel halfway around a corner.

    As to: "So the average hoon boy racer needs to have some spare cash and a club thats well organised over here to get on the track."

    Cry me a river. "Practising costs money" boo hoo. News flash: Things cost money. Welcome to the *twentieth* century. Maybe one day you can join us in the 21st.

    Perhaps if more of these wannabes were prepared to pay track fees and join clubs, there would be the facilities for them - it's not the responsibility of the local councils to shell out taxpayer money for a pack of drunk and drugged layabouts to have an ego-wank. You want the facilities to have fun? Support the sodding clubs with time and money. Can't be arsed or bling and other ego wanks more important? STFU.

    The wankers over here seem to find enough cash have late-model hairdresser cars and put shit-loads of chrome and neon in/on them, so I'd say money is not the issue. They seem to have enough money to throw away on "bling" and buying trash-can-sized exhausts (which they promptly fuck by drilling holes in 'em because "it soundz mean, eh.")

    Perhaps if they paid more money on club/track fees than having a wank-fest?

    Strangely, a lot of the guys 'n' gals I ride with manage to pay track fees *and* maintain performance machines. Me, I muck around off-road on a relatively low maintenance (therefore comparatively low performance) bike. Others I know spend a fortune rebuilding high performance Moto-X bikes after every event - I'm nowhere in that league, financially, but I still have my fun without risking the lives of random unsuspecting members of the public. I also have to pay fees to go on the enduro tracks and replace bits of my bike that I damage.

    Those who ride bikes as stupidly and recklessly as the boi racers are called "squids" - and they're a pack of fuckwits, too.

    In the words of my mate, Jake (Yamaha Vmax): "I won't ride with him. He's a fucking squid and I don't ride with squids!"

  59. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Plot for the new ad campaign..

    Police Officer :

    Well son, your car's not that badly damaged and although your girlfriend was thrown through the windscreen she's not hurt at all - though I can't understand why she wasn't wearing her seatbelt or how you could crash on a straight, empty road - so why are you crying?

    Boy Racer:

    Have you seen what she's holding in her hand?!

  60. Matthew Smith
    Coat

    Shouldn't they let men just show their dicks in public to avoid unnecessary displacement activities?

    nuff said

    Your coats are in the hall

  61. Jon Tocker
    Stop

    3 Words to Matthew Smith:

    ACH! Mein eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyes!

  62. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Driving over the legal limit isn't the issue

    Only about 5% of accidents in the UK (don't know about down under) involve a driver exceeding the posted speed limit.

    http://tinyurl.com/2ssw2l

    (Links to UK Telegraph)

    Speeding doesn't cause accidents, by their very nature fixed speed limits are not a perfect indication of how fast a driver should drive. If you drive to your abilities, the capabilities of the car and the road it is pretty safe to exceed the speed limit. Just look at police drivers, they sometimes drive well over 100mph and yet they don't cause many accidents.

    I have on occasion exceed the speed limit, however I don't think that makes me bigger or smaller in the trouser department. On the other hand I don't drive a small hatchback with music blaring out of open windows, blue LEDs on the bonnet and a 40 foot wide exhaust system that sounds like it's been ripped off and someone has used a bin as a replacement.

    I drive an old Volvo, which I hope makes no statement at all about me, my driving or my trouser department (except for the people thinking I'm driving my granddad's car). It's very fast, relatively safe (for it's age) and very comfy.

    I just don't understand this obsession about making a car look fast, whats the point if it's still slow. Why but a cr*p car and spend £1000s on adding spoilers etc when you could simply have bought a better, faster car? Now that's all mouth and no trousers!

  63. Iain Gilbert

    @Proportional to the size of your car

    I don't know about in Australia but here in the UK the boy racers all tend to drive little hatchbacks or imprezzas/BMWs (If they have money).

    I would say that the size of the drivers "tackle" is inversely proportionate to the size of the exhaust divided by the size of the engine. (A car with a large engine NEEDs a larger exhaust than a smaller engine car, but generally the larger the exhaust the smaller the tackle).

    Either that or the Louder the exhaust the smaller the equipment.

  64. Ben Tasker Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    Lack of racetracks

    Just thought I would put in my two cents on this one, the nearest outlet for a track day for me would probably be brands hatch. The charges there are as high as one would expect, and I simply cannot afford these outings.

    I used to go there from time to time, but financial situations change. My 650 is almost perfectly prepped for racing, once you've given it time to cool down a touch its a five minute job to remove the road legal baffle from the exhaust leaving you with a straight thru can, remove the indicators and such like for a bit of weight advantage (and so you don't kill them if you come off) and I could potentially put this to use on Britains roads.

    Do I? no. Whilst I used to love racing, my being unable to afford a track day does not justify racing around town putting others lives at risk. I ride a good distance to work no matter what the weather and will always see at least one of these egomaniacal dickheads. On occasion the thing that has saved my life has been a combination of anticipation, and my riding proficiency. Something that has been raised previously in the comments is that these boi racers do not know (or care) how good a rider I am.

    Recently I was having a bad day and did something i would never normally do (I was havin a bad day) having been tailgated down the outside lane, and then flashed for a good 5 seconds with high beams (somewhat knackering my nightvision) I pulled into the inside lane to let the subaru pass me, then when he did it to the driver who had been just a stopping distance in front of me I saw red. Dropped a cog, caught up with this driver and then gave him a bit of his own medicine (though I didn't tailgate him) the effect of having a very big built biker chase him down and then hit him with full beams was clearly enough to make him drive at the speed limit keeping stopping distances for the rest of the time that I could see him.

    Does it make me a squid? It was very squidish behaviour, and Icannot believe I did it, but damn did it feel good to remind him that he's putting his life at risk as well as other peoples lives. There are a lot of hells angels in my area and had he done it to the ones I know then he may well have come out of it far worse.

    Generally I sit at what I believe to be a safe acceptable speed, sometimes the safest place to be is ahead of all the traffic, but I don't let any sort of ego make the decision. If someone wants to try and race me from some traffic lights I will quite happily sit and make sure they are safely out of my way before I pull away.

    I miss the days of racing, but that alone isn't enough to justify me racing on public roadways, no matter what time of night it may be.

    If you have enough money to spend on the mods that are popular around here, then you could easily afford to go without the mod and have some trackdays instead. But britains roads are all about willy stroking, and the wankers that do it will often take someone else out with them.

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