back to article WAR ON PORN: UK flicks switch on 'I am a pervert' web filters

Prime Minister David Cameron will today gaily announce that Brit adults will be forced to ask their ISP for permission to view web grumble flicks. The system will also ensure people typing in "abhorrent search terms" for stuff online will receive a "warning" along with some helpline numbers - although a former child protection …

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    1. Serif
      Unhappy

      Re: Level of ignorance

      This is what worries me too. In this case we can point and laugh at how technically illiterate the government are, but what about all the decisions that require expertise in areas other than IT? I have a bad feeling that the powers that be are equally ignorant in anything that an Oxford PPE degree didn't cover.

  1. jonfr

    Steps to censorship

    This is nothing but steps to censorship in the UK. This types of filters are not going to stop hormone driven teenagers to view what they want on the internet. Since kids are curious in there own peer group, and they are going to have sex too among there peers.

    For illegal childrens images and such matters. This is just going to remove it from view, it is not going to do anything to stop the source of this material, the people who makes it and needs to be thrown into jail and stopped.

    What this is about is censorship and nothing else. They are just taking this in small steps, before people in the UK know, everything is going to be censored and the internet is going to be useless.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Steps to censorship

      "and the internet is going to be useless."

      Mumsnet, Fakesuckerbook, gov.uk, any shopping site, witter, etc... Are you saying these are useless?

      I'd agree wholeheartedly!

  2. MrXavia
    Big Brother

    Censorship plain and simple...

    I don't mind the filters being available, BUT the filters must be off by default, OR at the very least, an active choice.. I.E. 'Do you want our family filters enabled?'

    My BIG issue with this, is that the parent can't turn filters off for himself and on for the kids...

    so in reality they are pointless...

  3. Brother52
    Big Brother

    Neigbours WiFi?

    What if my neighbour has the block removed and then sets a week password on his wifi and my little angels connect to his network and view porn, oh the horror, then can I sue him?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Neigbours WiFi?

      once your "little angels" have admitted breaching the computer misuse act then that could be used as part of your evidence, presumably ...

      1. David Pollard

        Re: Neigbours WiFi?

        Misuse? But it called itself 'Netgear' and log on was with 'admin' and 'password' just the same as the one in our house so how were we to know the difference?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Neigbours WiFi?

          cursory reading of the letter of the law suggests it doesn't provide ignorance as a defence: if it wasn't yours, and someone for whom you are responsible used it without permission, tough, they committed the offence. Obviously you are responsible for their conduct, but you would never knowingly let a minor for whom you are responsible hack into someone else;s network, so you'll be fine. No-one on your side would do such a thing,

          or something like that.

    2. Intractable Potsherd

      Re: Neigbours WiFi?

      And it's going to be a brave person that has an open wifi connection ...

    3. Anonymous Coward 15

      Re: Neigbours WiFi?

      There's no breach of the act if the "victim" consents.

  4. Lamont Cranston
    Thumb Down

    The "opt out of filtering" doesn't bother me,

    but the idea that the PM can dictate what terms we can/cannot type into a search engines, is a terrifying thought.

  5. Dr Wadd

    The hunt starts for a new definition of "David Cameron"

    Surely the obvious solution to this is to start a campaign to have the phrase "David Cameron" become slang for something utterly depraved much in the same way "Santorum" has taken on an entirely new meaning in recent years? Once Dave realises that he can't search online for his own name perhaps he'll have a bit of a think about this issue (I'm deliberately not using the word "re-think" as I see no evidence of cogent thought flowing from 10 Downing Street).

  6. Number6

    So how will I be able to search for Austrian towns near Tarsdorf and Sensberg?

    1. Christoph

      Or for a light beer from that area

    2. Anonymous Coward 15

      Or upload your photos/videos from your holiday in the area during the summer heatwave.

  7. localzuk Silver badge

    List?

    So, people are saying they worry about what will happen to the list of those who opt out of this filter... Get yourself a VPS in the US or Canada, set up your own proxy and you won't appear on the list. All for $5 a month.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So how about those who aren't in charge of the connection?

    I live in a house share with a live-out landlord, do I have to call him up to ask him to get the porn switched back on? That should be an interesting conversation. He'll be changing the mattresses when I leave after that one ... although judging by the state of it when I moved in, perhaps not.

    Anonymous Coward for obvious reasons ;)

  9. Christoph

    Place your bets ladies and gentlemen

    Which will get accidentally leaked first?

    1> The database of everyone who has asked for the filters to be switched off

    2> The list of which sites are being filtered

    3> The police database of child porn images

    1. Crisp
      Big Brother

      It wont need to be leaked.

      I'm sure that all that information is passed along to the Pedofinder General.

  10. Occipital
    Trollface

    Oh FFS!

    Well Cameron should know best. After all, he is a complete wanker who spends his entire day surrounded by cocks.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So what happens when...

    ... I try to browse the net on my Ainol tablet?

  12. Cthonus

    We have a PM who refuses to follow what the majority of the public want and implement the Leveson report as it sets a bad precident over "Press Freedom".

    Now he feels he can impose a web filter on everyone (opt out be damned: if it's filtering content not specifically designated as illegal it's censorship by the back door) wanting to access the internet at home whilst still condoning the right of newspapers and other sundry rags to sexualise children and stuff photos of semi-naked women between the newssheets where any kid can see.

    I know it will never work: the attempts to block PirateBay just illustrates how the web routes around such blockages, but knowing it'll never work doesn't lessen the anger I feel.

    Fix the economy. Fix the gutter press. Fix our army's kit shortages. Fix youth unemployment. Fix your own lobbyists.

    Don't just pander to the Daily Mail readership as if it makes up the entire electorate.

    Porn does not equate with Abuse/Rape any more than Muslim equates with Terrorism (though his beloved Daily Mail may argue the latter).

    </rant>

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      And fix house prices. As in make them *drop* *catastrophically*.

  13. Notrub

    This is only the start

    I'm amazed that the public are now receptive of this idea to the extent that it will certainly go through without large demonstrations.

    Of course in itself it's almost defensible - I mean who can argue against the idea of protecting children from harm? Note though that the government frequently confuse the situation by inter-mixing the terms kiddie-porn and porn when presenting their case. Kiddie-porn is bad - BUT this block will have ZERO effect on it, so the term should not even be used.

    But let's assume that Cameron's threats are real - what happens next?

    Well of course some porn will continue to get through the filters - there are so many sites where porn makes a percentage of the available material, but the site as a whole is not a porn site - Tumblr springs to mind. Is Cameron then going to live up to his threat to introduce legislation, presumably making it an offence to allow porn material through to a filtered account? If so then the ISP's are going to have to blockade far far more sites that are mostly non-porn in order to ensure that NO porn ever gets through - they are also going to have to err on the side of caution, meaning that they are likely to block sites first and ask questions later.

    The next stage of course, is when the government decides to use the same mechanism to include other material - first up will be "terrorist" sites and banned organisations.. who will be able to argue with that? Then this list will inevitably grow - groups such as EDL are on the edge of being banned.

    Then of course any sites that are deemed offensive will follow: the law is kind of vague here already on what material is illegal and what isn't, but from what I've observed recently, if a sufficient number of people are offended, that's enough for the judge..... goodbye to jokes about disasters, anti-religious views, ANYTHING on sex.....

    ALL of this will be sold to the public on the basis of preventing them from breaking ALREADY existing laws. Of course the blocks are going to have to be oh so much wider than that in scope.

    Then someone is going to suggest that instead of using a white-list, we use a black-list.

    Of course while all of the above is occurring, other events will occur.

    It will slowly become socially unacceptable and legally awkward to opt out. People's status will be revealed in court proceedings, and in the absence of other evidence prosecutions will still push the case that this man opted out of the porn block, therefore he is more likely to be a rapist.

    Eventually only a small minority will dare to opt-out, at which point the government will probably decide to remove the option completely.

    George Orwell picks up from this point onwards....

    1. Sir Runcible Spoon

      Re: This is only the start

      "Then someone is going to suggest that instead of using a white-list, we use a black-list."

      Didn't you mean that the other way round? A white-list is much scarier.

      1. Notrub

        Re: This is only the start

        Yup - I did - well spotted!

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Stone sour

    Silly world

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So how long before your typical red light store gets banned in the UK?

    Actually, how long before all porn gets banned?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Actually, how long before all porn gets banned?"

      Not going to happen. Whether mums(who need to live in the real world)net like it or not!

      Over half the world’s bandwidth is being consumed by porn. Porn, like it or not, IS a natural thing. Sex is a natural thing, voyeurism is a natural thing. If it was not, why do 99.9% of human beings do such things?

      Let us not turn into a muslim state and demonise acts which are perfectly healthy and god given naturally.

      (and to clarify, because most people do not read (or cannot), there is no mention of children in that statement) If you want to "think of the children", then explain why you have not put filters in place yourself?

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I Dispise the 'glish scum!

    Why do all the retarded "think of the children" always get away with it?

    Why do parents always pass on their responsibilities to EVERYONE else?

    Oi, scum! Look after your children and stop leaving the internet to babysit!

    Where are social services? They should be heavily investigating these scummy mummys.

    Scummy Brit parents, kids having kids!

    The country is just such a MASSIVE let down!

  17. Brother52
    Childcatcher

    Some form of Child Monitoring Adult Required?

    This is ineffective and expensive, we may as well go the whole hog and assign one or two adults to each set of brothers/sisters and make them legally responsible for the safety and well being of those said children up until they come of age. These nominated adults could live in the same house and oversee the development of the children across a wide spectrum of areas.

    The adults taking on this responsibility would be People Acting Responsibly, Educating, Nourishing, Teaching and Stimulating their charges or PARENTS for short.

    1. Alister

      Re: Some form of Child Monitoring Adult Required?

      Nah, what a ridiculous idea, it'll never catch on.

      Actual Adults, having to take responsibility for Children??

      Don't be silly..

      1. JDX Gold badge

        Re: Some form of Child Monitoring Adult Required?

        Clearly these adults should also be responsible for their designated childrens' education as well - it's crazy how children have to be sent to special institutions to learn things.

    2. Ru
      Big Brother

      Re: Some form of Child Monitoring Adult Required?

      The adults taking on this responsibility would be People Acting Responsibly, Educating, Nourishing, Teaching and Stimulating their charges or PARENTS for short.

      That's exactly the sort of behaviour these new rules are intended to prevent.

      1. Brother52

        Re: Some form of Child Monitoring Adult Required?

        Exactly, god forbid we teach them how to think for themselves

  18. FreddieFlintoffStone

    An administration cannot drive moral behaviour through Default-On.

    I don't want an Opt-Out filter - I want an Opt-In filter which *only* filters illegal stuff :)

  19. Christoph
    Holmes

    That warning screen

    You have typed an illegal search term!

    You will be hauled up in court and sent to jail unless you pay an immediate fine!

    Send £100 immediately to scammer@nigeria.com or we will drag you off in front of all your neighbours!

  20. Combat Wombat

    Well my English cousins...

    You need to do what we did in Australia.

    Protest the shit out of it, and make it clear that if they try and implement that PoS, they will not be re elected.

    Although Labour isn't much better, they aren't messing with your porn

    1. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

      Re: Well my English cousins...

      Although Labour isn't much better, they aren't messing with your porn

      Actually, they were the ones who enacted the particular piece of legislation that makes some cartoon porn illegal, the making of which would have involved no abuse of any real, living organism in any way.

      Just because most of us will find such images at best puzzling, and morally objectionable, it doesn't justify our political overlords classifying it as what is essentially thought-crime.

      In other words, it doesn't matter what colour tie your elected member wears, (s)he is still most likely an utter arsehole with at best a tenuous grasp on reality.

    2. WonkoTheSane
      FAIL

      Re: Well my English cousins...

      Unfortunately, any such protest will receive absolutely zero coverage in the regular press,

      as the f***w*ts who own it all are 100% behind the ban in order to promote sales of their old-fashioned skin mags.

  21. Anonymous South African Coward Bronze badge

    George Orwell was spot on...

    Rollback to 1984, and commit.

  22. JimmyPage Silver badge
    FAIL

    No one spotted the other obvious flaw in this cauldron of fail ?

    Presumably it's only English-speaking perverts that will be affected. Or will the blacklists be translated into the appropriate terms in other languages[1]. I mean will "Chercher pour les enfants nue" be blocked ?

    [1]Although I suspect, most UK politicians aren't aware there's a world that doesn't speak English ....

  23. CmdrX3

    They can have my porn

    When they pry it from my cold dead eyes..... good luck with prying my hand free though :-D

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Kids gloves for everyone

    Because you're all children in their eyes.

    It's as if your entire country just got AOL.

    1. hplasm
      Devil

      Re: Kids gloves for everyone

      Won't somebody think we're not children!

  25. Stilted Banter

    Ugh

    ... profoundly disturbed at the idea of 'a pop-up that paedophiles will laugh at'.

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Write to your MP, I'm sure most of us here have a large enough grasp on the technology to write a well argued complaint about these filters, so if your British, Write To Them now!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Yes because anyone who is a techy automatically agrees with you.

      1. Old Handle

        Yes because anyone who is a techy automatically agrees with you.

        They may not agree on the ethics of the matter (although there does seem to be a correlation), but they will most probably agree that such a filter is (also) a bad idea for a variety of technical reasons.

    2. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

      I shall certainly be doing this. My local MP is actually likely to be opposed to this bill. Being a Liberal, and also the first openly gay member of parliament, I expect him to be reasonably open-minded.

      My recommendation is to try to present a well argued, polite and concise missive to your MP, explaining exactly which points and assumptions in this bill you find objectionable. At the very least, your MP's office has to acknowledge receipt.

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