Favorite so far
Sociopathic, vindictive turd of a manager went on a rampage to try to fire anyone who left their single sign-on token unattended. 'Unattended' here is literally defined as more than a half meter from your fingertips...for this particular fire drill you are in deep kimchi if you turn away from the card reader without pulling it
Same gal kept leaving hers in her machine and going to 'lunch' with a senior manager.
Knowing that the two of them would be going at it hammer and tongs for at least the two minutes a VP can achieve and sustain... we disassembled the smart card reader and co formal coated the contacts with clear nail polish. Only thing available on short notice. Kept her from doing anything 'productive' for DAYS
IT guy broke into a big smile when he figured out the mod and we had a helluva laugh over it... his comment? "Always wear protection!"