back to article Gordon 'to sacky' Wacky Jacqui

Jacqui Smith will leave the Cabinet on Monday, it was reported today. Citing "impeccable sources", Sky News said the Home Secretary will be a casualty of the expenses row. Revelations that she had claimed for her husband's pay-per-view porn kicked off the scandal over MPs dodgy expenses back in March. It later emerged she …


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  1. Derek Green
    Thumb Up

    Over 130 comments in around 9 hours!

    Over 130 comments in around 9 hours!

    I haven't read them all, but I'm sure they are full of love and admiration for our, oh so soon to be departing HomeSec.

    I never worked out if her particular brand of 'government' drivel was down to gross stupdity mixed with following the nannying party-line OR some particular evil empire tendencies but either way, good riddance.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    She's gone!!


    Claimed she was leaving because of pressure on her family, what pressure exactly?

    Has anyone seen any newspaper articles on her family, has the media been harrassing her family? No. Pressure on her perhaps.

    Even in defeat this spineless b**tch still can't admit the truth and be honest, she has to try to blame her resignation on someone else.

    I fear that her predecessor will continue her insane policies, because to abandon them will be tantamount to saying "we the labour government got it wrong..", and that is something this labour government just can not do.

  3. Arse Face

    nods in agreement

    Reading all this, I think i've for once found a Reg story in which everybody agree's with eachother on the same subject!

    Labour just do not get the message.

    However, regardless of who takes over, i've now reached a point where I have absolutely no faith in any of the system anyway.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Defending her majority

    "According to the BBC she will defend her skinny 2,716 majority in Redditch at the next election"

    Let's hope she does defend it, and let's hope she is slaughtered. Then her humiliation will be complete (and just). Then she will realise and finally have to accept she just isn't wanted, and isn't up to the job.

    But then earning £140K per year and claiming for a 68p (or was is 88p?) bath plug on expenses, clearly she's out of touch.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    She had to resign, because she knew she was about to be booted out, possibly moved to another less high a profile and lower value post. Oh the humiliation.

    The whole world would then know she was no good ( we all did anyway) , but it would be official.

    So all this is, is a resignation before she was fired, to make things look a little more respectable ( 'I'm leaving because of the pressure on my family', what B/S that is).

    Let's hope she loses her job as an MP and isn't voted back in, then she can go back to being a useless school teacher like before.

  6. b166er

    @AC 6th from top

    Impressive comment-fu dude, you broke out into the sidebar!

    Whoever they replace her with, it doesn't matter, 'cos they'll all be out on their ears next general election. I actually wish the Queen would step in at this point.

  7. passionate indifference

    Surely this should have been done ages ago

    1) Remove Jacqui

    2) Obtain a Linux Live CD

    3) Put in drive

    4) Install Linux

    I can't believe the government has waited this long before finally bending to the will of the people

  8. RW


    AC Posted Tuesday 2nd June 2009 14:33 GMT: "Never forget - the ineptitude of this governement - the rot - goes all the way to the core. 1 down, 600 odd left to go."

    Jimmy Posted Tuesday 2nd June 2009 15:41 GMT: "As Jacqui drags her sorry ass out of the Home Office she leaves behind the team of 'special advisers' that Nulab installed to override and manage the objective advice offered by the civil servants. The unelected control freaks stay in post (at our cost) so don't look for any change of policy."

    I'm afraid Jimmy has it right. Twelve years of ZanuLabour have resulted in the installation of their minions throughout the civil service. (This is called "politicization of the civil service.") The rot in British government is not limited to the 600-some MPs. It is now pervasive no matter where you look. Why else would the police, once famed worldwide for their civility and given the trust of the population, act like so many thugs? Why else would you have the innumerable insane health and safety orders because something _might_ happen? (Never mind that most of these potential incidents don't in fact happen, and those that do are straightforward occupational hazards.) Why else would you have social workers kidnapping children from their parents and adopting them away, never to be seen again? Why else would Phorm be given a tacit green light? Why else would decisions of the ECHR be ignored? Why else would putting your trash out on the wrong day be viewed as a serious offense?

    Regrettably, I see no party on the horizon that will (a) undo at the stroke of a pen all the horrible laws and regulations of the Blair-Brown era and (b) conduct a thorough-going purge of their moles throughout the public sector.

    The damage is done and cannot be repaired. Humpty-Dumpty has falled off his wall, and all that's left is to make omelets. (But beware H&S regulations regarding the handling of hot fat.)

  9. Moss Icely Spaceport
    Thumb Up

    Bust a nut

    Thanks Mr Smith, your nut-bustin' antics worked a treat.

  10. Anonymous Coward

    Don't know why you're all crowing.

    Even though she "resigned" she'll get a year's salary as redundancy and of course a gold-plated pension most of us can only dream of. If that's punishment please let me have some.

    She and the other crooks at Westminster, who wrote their own corrupt expenses rules and still broke even those, should be on their way to jail, not a cosy "retirement".

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Leftover new years champagne

    has now been put to good use. Even by the extremely poor standard of home secs within my lifetime, she stands out as the worst by a mile.

    The real champagne moment though was the clip on the BBC news of her in parliament after the opposition landed a rare good one. Ranks right up there with the recent images of moats, duck islands and Julie Kirkbride + husband getting canned.

    The only way you could top this is by getting the rest of the cabinet and tory front bench to jump into a vat of boiling oil en masse in Parliament square.

    Paris, cos even she'd be a better HS than Jackboots Smith was

  12. jake Silver badge

    157 comments (as I type).

    And not a single comment in favo(u)r of the current UK government's methodology.

    Not one. Not even one kinda, sorta sympathetic.

    Either the politicians should be shaking in their boots, or the intellectuals should ... There is going to be a cleansing, and it's going to happen soon.

    Get off your arses & FUCKING VOTE when you have a chance, or it'll be too late.

  13. Danny Thompson
    Thumb Up

    Let me be the first to say ...

    "Good riddance" ... errr, well I would have been first ... given half the chance. This scab on politics is long overdue being lanced.

    There will be no tears shed for her. Now go and never come back.

  14. TeeCee Gold badge
    Thumb Down

    Surely not!

    ".....she will defend her skinny 2,716 majority in Redditch at the next election."

    <Bez - Arabian Nights>



    </Bez - Arabian Nights>

  15. Mostor Astrakan


    After all that this woman has wrought, they kick her out because her husband's pay-per-view porn ended up on the hotel bill somehow? What do they charge these days? Fifteen quid?

    For fuck's sake. THIS is why I gave up voting.

    Somebody probably dropped something noxious in Parliament which turns the nice bright-eyed people you vote for into the bunch of degenerate muppets you see before you now. EIther that or they aren't paying the election marketing people enough, and they have been this bad all along.

  16. dedmonst
    Paris Hilton

    You get the politicians you deserve

    terrible she may have been - deserving of the outpouring of spite and hate in these comments? I'm not so sure...

    Remember the way the UK parliamentary democracy works - you vote for your MP, and those with the most run the country for X years. It's only the media that convice us differently. What would you replace it with?

    Never mind, next year they'll all be voted out and you can cheer and go woot! to your hearts content about the bunch that replace them - then a few years later when the media fall out of love with that lot, they can convince all you sheep that the next lot are just as bad, and so we go on...

    > I actually wish the Queen would step in at this point.

    Oh yeah, what Britain needs right now is a good old fashioned unelected leader - now I'm sure there was another name for that sort of person, what was it?

    If our politicians are greedy, cheating liars ask yourself why? You get the politicians you deserve.

    Paris, cos I suspect she at least knows *who* is shafting her.

  17. Ed Blackshaw Silver badge

    To those calling for a general election...

    ...not yet. Make sure you vote in the Euro elections though - your MEP is the one who represents you on the European legislature, which is arguably the one that matters more than the Commons. Lets make sure we get rid of the New Labour snakes in that house first, THEN worry about kicking them out of our national parliament.

  18. Simon Ward
    Thumb Down

    Re: You get the politicians you deserve

    "Oh yeah, what Britain needs right now is a good old fashioned unelected leader - now I'm sure there was another name for that sort of person, what was it?"

    If memory serves, the monarch has the power to dissolve Parliament which could, in theory, force an election - the Queen being an unelected leader doesn't come into it.

    Unfortunately, this is unlikely to happen because of 'constitutional difficulties' , which is to say 'this has never happened before therefore nobody has a bloody clue how they'd handle it'.

    Anyway, we already have a good old-fashioned unelected leader - the one-eyed Scottish idiot in No.10. And please, don't argue semantics - yes, the collective 'we' voted the Labour party in, inasmuch that Tony B.Liar was the leader at the time and hence became the PM. As far as I'm concerned, Prudence Broon has no mandate to govern - when Phony Tony stood down there should have been a General Election, pure and simple, although given what happened during the Thatcher->Major transition determining whether or not this is a good thing is left as an exercise for the reader.

  19. Simon Ward
    Thumb Up

    And another one down ...

    The Poison Dwarf has resigned:

  20. Tom

    @AC 18:05

    Hahaha, brilliant :D

  21. kevin biswas

    Can we have our country back now...

    ...please ?

    "And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn't there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? War, terror, disease. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the now high chancellor, Adam Sutler. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent."

  22. Anonymous Coward


    and I bet she uses Linux

  23. Jimmy Floyd

    @Simon Ward

    Actually there is some precedent. In 1975 Australian PM Gough Whitlam was sacked by the Governor General, Queen Elizabeth's representative in Oz, after the Parliament effectively got itself into a political stalemate. The Aussies (bless 'em) kicked up a right royal stink at being told what to do by their Pommie overlords ... then promptly validated her decision by overwhelmingly voting for the former opposition!

    So, Her Majesty does still have the power to do so but, given the potential fallout, would probably only do it if the overwhelming majority of the people wanted an election but Gordon was just being too stubborn to call it.

    Oh, and @dedmonst: yes, Wacky Jacqui really is deserving of the outpouring of spite and venom here. A Stalinist by any other name would smell as smell.

  24. David Lee

    Hang the Witch!

    As much as I am glad she has gone, she will only be replaced by a New Labour Clone, nothing really will change.

    That said I want to see her humiliated at the next election if she has the ...ahem...balls to stand. Also be nice to see her prosecuted for fraud. Im sure the police would love to be given the chance to get their revenge for her police pay rise betrayal.

    I also want to see the rest of the corrupt bastards on the scaffold next to her doing the Tyburn jig!

    AC....she hasnt left yet.....

  25. Anonymous Coward

    Could this be...

    ... the wank than sank the Home Office crank?

    ...the somewhat grubby mac please

  26. David

    Vote Extremist ?

    Good riddance to the woman.

    So who do we vote for now ? Some are worried that we will vote for extremists as a back-lash, but I think we already have the extremists in power. Complete with an unelected Prime minister. I think its a complete waste of time to vote for the 'fringe' parties, we simply would not land up with a government capable of 'fixing' the current issues. We COULD land up with some very nasty people in power --- way beyond those already there !! We NEED a strong government and boy will they be under the microscope ! So no place for the racists, environmentalists, independents. The only way to fix things is for a consensus and that means a strong party with MPs working FOR the policies and voting for GOOD IDEAS even if proffered by their enemies !

    To those who reckon that the protest is to decline to vote, I would say this. You can have NO COMPLAINT --- YOU GIVE UP THE RIGHT TO SAY ANYTHING --- and YOU open the door to admitting the 'extremists' by default --- YOUR deFAULT !! They are talking about making it possible to SACK an MP, but, to make that work, you can't have more people voting for the sacking than voted for the election. In fact, surely ONLY those who voted for that particular MP can participate in a vote to dismiss them ? Or would that be too close to fairness and common sense to be acceptable ? For that to work, we could no longer have a secret ballot. So, fail to vote and WE WILL KNOW WHO YOU ARE, so shut your face and drink your pint --- close the door when you leave !

    The British (read GUTTER) Press have set themselves up to print innuendo, rumour, hints, nods and winks as though they were utterly factual. Indeed, they have taken upon themselves to be judge and jury. I agree with a free press, but with freedom comes a responsibility to behave in a decent manner. Bring the matter to the public attention and I applaud you for that --- go on the pillory people you don't like because you found some vague hint that they aren't squeaky clean, then I won't buy you rag. Character assassination based on rumour is right down there in the mire. Seen the behaviour of the press photographers ? If one of their 'victims' pulled a machine gun from under their coat and simply sprayed in a 360 degree burst of fire, I don't think I could find them guilty of anything other than creating litter --- and I might let them off with a £10 fine !

    Maybe that's a bit too extreme :)

  27. Ihre Papiere Bitte!!
    Thumb Up


    Soon she will be subject to all the intrusive laws she introduced, without being able to hide behind the fact that she's an MP. Beautiful. In fact, if we could get rid of these idiotic ideas completely for everyone but her (and any others from the current crowd, especially Harman, Blears, Mcnulty, Darling, Balls, Milliband & Milliband, Brown... I could go on...), then that would be just perfect.

    Now we just need to do something* to stop her and the other bottom-feeders getting their "resettlement grant" of £30-60k when they get booted out, along with a pension we could only dream of.

    *ideas welcome!

  28. Adam Silver badge

    Sure this is a good thing?

    Jack Straw was a less liberal Home Sec. than Michael Howard. Blunkett was less liberal than Straw. Clarke and Reid were just ineffective. Smith was less liberal than Blunkett.

    There's a pattern there that doesn't look good.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    About time

    Goodbye and good riddance.

    where is redditch? I might move there to vote against her...

  30. Steve Swann

    Let me be the first.... say farewell to our fascist, unelected, privacy-hating, technophobic, unaccountable, thieving, fraudulent treacherous ex-overlords.

    (begins preparing welcome sign for new overlords....)

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Oh yeah

    It was worth having her in office just to see her being humiliated like this.

    Let the next not be Blunkett. General elections now please, thank you

  32. Anonymous Coward

    Write your personal message to Jacqui Smith

  33. elderlybloke

    When she is dead

    everyone will say nice things about her.

    I have nothing against her , probably because I live down in the South Pacific.

  34. Florence Stanfield
    Thumb Down

    Hope he sacks himself

    and rest of his selected cronies

  35. Dylan Fahey

    I know you don't care, but

    I know you don't care, but it's nice to see you Brits clean house too. It took us over 8 years and a couple of changes of the mop bucket, but we got rid of our morons too. It will take us more than 8 years to correct all the damage done. I tip my hat to ya! Remember, personal freedoms and privacy are at the top of the stack when it comes to the important things in life.

    November 2008 shows what happens when a people are reborn. We here in America have let some knuckle dragging, right wing, moral minority extremists run our government for too long, under the cover of 'we are doing what's morally right!" What a mistake that was. Our latest voting shows that at least some Americans have woken up and been shocked to see the overall effect a religiously run government. We can only improve now, after the terrible depths we have sunken to here in America.

    You can see, hear, and taste what is 'right' concerning life. And the famous qoute (I don't who), "Something doesn't smell right, and I'm not going to eat it", really does apply to all politicians and their baggage. If they don't perform to what you elected them to do, FIRE THEIR DUMB ARSES.

    It's the only sensible thing to do. You'd do it to your plumber, your doctor, whomever didn't perform when getting paid with your good money.

    Good Luck in improving your lives by clearing out the chafe in your government.


  36. John Smith Gold badge
    Thumb Down


    "Poor old Jacqui has simply been conned by them, because she's too stupid (former cooking teacher, remember) to understand the implications of their sinister plans."

    Incredible as it may seem Jacqui is an Oxbridge graduate. Her subject was Economics, not Home Economics. I think hubby is more likely been living on microwave dinners.

    I'd call her behaviour rather more a "Coalition of the willing."

    Authoritarian power mad wing nuts that is.


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