back to article What if tech moguls brewed real ale?

The fine people at CAMRA are also fans of The Register, and are giving away both free and discount tickets for possibly one of the greatest shows on Earth: the incredible Great British Beer Festival at Olympia next month. To get in free, you must enter the competition below. Free entry will go to the five readers (and two of …

Silver badge

Re: "Cloudy Bollocks"

"Sometimes served from a leaking bucket."

Pail ale?

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Zuckerburp

Zuckerburp.

+

Zuckerburp, shadow profile.

Tasting Notes.

Best consumed in private. Avoid oversharing these beers. Can leave a bad aftertaste and severe headaches that prove difficult to resolve.

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Anonymous Coward

Elders of the Internet

Elders of the Internet

Tasting Notes.

One of Kind. A somewhat lighter feel to it than expected.

An absolute favourite of Theresa May and Amber Rudd.

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Wannabeer

Wannabeer

Tasting Notes.

Stains everything if spilt. Avoid at all costs. Never confess to drinking it.

A one-time favourite pastime of Marcus Hutchins.

Don't try to work out what it's made of, based loosely on an original recipe by the NSA/GCHQ.

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Anonymous Coward

Western Digital Black

Western Digital Black

Tasting Notes.

It was a far better prize for all this work ;)

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Anonymous Coward

Google Eyed GDPR

Google Eyed GDPR

Tasting Notes.

Don't drink too much. Keep your hands to yourself, avoid the tendency to let them wonder.

GDPR means No in any European language, or an expensive fine.

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Pint

The 8 Bitter

Nostalgic trip down memory lane when beer was tasty and affordable and the computer games weren't so complicated...

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Yum!!

Managed 11 attempts before beer o'clock

a) Emale or just E-mail - For the old fashioned connoisseur that hates social media!!

b) Man in the Mid ale attack - Authentic and trustworthy ale for non techies

c) Kernale - Makes your system work like magic!!

all served in (80)586ml glasses

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Anonymous Coward

Gorilla Beer

Gorilla Beer.

Beer ordered and served in Gorilla Glass.

Tasting Notes

There's an Ape for that*.

*Well it worked last time!

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Google Glass

No, not a receptacle for serving beer.

Probably seemed like a good idea for whoever thought of the idea, much like looking through Beer Goggles.

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GDPR say 7%

Gets Directly to the Parts other ales cannot Reach.

And it effs you up just as badly as the legislation.

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Bronze badge

Divide by Beero - an undefinable hoppiness...

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Scratch Monkey

A pint of this is like an electric shock to the brain.

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Software marketing model

The brewing recipe and process may be subject to continuous change and "improvement", fail QA tests, but slip through to the consumer

In a bid to capture and keep your custom, you may have to sign up to a subscription and provide personal information for marketing purposes

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Bishop's Three Fingers

Control + Ale + Delete

A disorientating strong ale with subtle hints of BSoD.

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All your beverages are belong to us

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Pint

HTMAle

HTMAle is the standard drinkup brew.

Well structured, with clean delineated elements including bold, emphasised, and underlined notes among its range of attributes, HMTAle is the ultimate world-wide beer, encompassing a vast, complex web of flavours.

HTMALe - truly Hoppy, Tasty, Malty Ale - available at a variety of strengths, with 5% now the most popular.

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Over Budget

A government sponsored, over-priced ale that tastes worse as you get further down the glass. You have to keep on drinking, and pretend you like it though, because you've paid so much, and don't want to admit you made a bad investment.

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Anonymous Coward

The Private Pint

The Private Pint.

Tasting notes.

Not cheap, you have to pay real money upfront for this great tasting Pint.

One of those traditional pints you long for, where standards are diligently upheld.

Not available in any Google,Experian or Facebook owned Pub.

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Distributed Denial of Soberness

DDoS (5.5 - ∞ % Vol)

A social drink, one to be enjoyed round after round after round after round, affordable and effective throughout the day. Expect a constant unending stream of flavour. The bottomless pint :)

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01100010 01100101 01100101 01110010 - 4.6% craft lager. Beer in it's most basic form.

16:59 Job Request - 8.0% DIPA. Something strong to keep the will to live.

4bit Brew - 6.0% cask aged beer from long ago.

Spring Update - 6.0% Gose. Leaves a sour taste in the mouth.

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Batch Tuesday

Brewed on the second Tuesday of each month, very sour in flavour, leaves a feeling of regret after consumption.

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Silver badge

Dev-Hops IPA

Triple hopped, extra citrus ale, 6.66% ABV, leaves you with a bitter aftertaste - seemed like a good idea at the time you bought it!

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Take your Musk off

An apologetic red (faced) ale showing some musky notes after being kept in a very damp cave.

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Pint

640 ml special brew

Should be enough for anyone...

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Bronze badge

Cyber Punch

Cider - Loosely based on a West country Scrumpy, you know the ones that get you pissed from the feet upwards.

With added Nanites - thoroughly intended to prevent you getting a hangover.

Side effects - note Nanites have been known to go rogue and covert you into a Borg!

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Sega ‘16 Bit’ter

Notes of hedgehog that take ages to be forgotten

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Silver badge

FaceBock

Makes you want to take all your clothes off and have a rectal exam and not care afterwards.

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Hard Beerexit

Celebrity endorsed by Nigel Farage, Unknown ABV% because we've torn up the regulations that require that sort of thing. Liked by 52% of people that first try it, but the aftertaste makes you realise what a long, drawn out mission it's going to be to swallow the remain(d)ers.

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REST IPA

An unfiltered beer, drank with a large head

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Cannot have a Bit of beer without a Byte to eat :-)

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