back to article Adult toy retailer slapped down for 'RES-ERECTI*N' ad over Easter

Adult toys and lingerie retailer Honey Birdette was today placed on the naughty step by the UK's egg-xacting watchdog the Advertising Standards Authority for mixing sex and religion in a promotion over Easter. The seller of sex toys including Milano Pleasure Beads and vibrators named Dolly, Dita, Dallas and Bullet Bliss, sent …

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"Yes, I have trouble respecting religions because they do so much wrong..."
Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity, instructed his followers to heal the sick. The early Christians were noted by their contemporaries for tending the sick and infirm. Hence it is no surprise that today the Roman Catholic Church is the largest non-government provider of health care services in the world. It has around 18,000 clinics, 16,000 homes for the elderly and those with special needs, and 5,500 hospitals, with 65 % of them located in developing countries. The Church's Pontifical Council for the Pastoral Care of Health Care Workers said that the Roman Catholic Church manages 26% of the world's health care facilities.

Can't be arsed to look at the contribution provided by the many other institutions that hew to the Christian or indeed other faiths.

The universities at Bologna (1088), the University of Paris (c.1150), and the University of Oxford (1167) were all established by the Roman Catholic Church.

Disclaimer: I'm not a Christian, but I am capable of accepting the facts of history.

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"I'm going to hell."
I'm pretty much evenly divided over heaven and hell. I have many friends in both places...

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Anonymous Coward

Much of the modern RCC's interest in buying up hospitals and medical groups is to allow them to restrict the services they provide. There is a long list of women's healthcare they do not allow their doctors to provide.

(At least this is how it is in the states. I live in an area where the two decent hospital chains and largest medical group were purchased by a large Catholic charity. The number of women who die in childbirth at their facilities has been climbing ever since. Gotta try to save that hopelessly premature baby. Too bad about the mother. Go team Jesus!)

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Anonymous Coward

"The early Christians were noted by their contemporaries for tending the sick and infirm."

So were many Muslim rulers when their empire was at the forefront of scientific research with preservation of ancient scientific texts. See Jim Al-Khalili "Science and Islam" on the BBC iPlayer.

The organised Christian religion has made a core fetish out of people having to suffer in this world and "the next" for the glory of their god.

The quality of a person's life has taken second place to an ideology that says preserving that life to its bitter end - no matter how painful for the recipient and their family - is a holy duty.

Mother Teresa was accused of giving her terminally ill patients nothing to really dull their pain - as their experiencing the pain was the important thing for her religious convictions.

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Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity," Was he? Or was Christianity founded in his name?

As your opening was false it doesn't say much for your intellect does it?

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"Was he? Or was Christianity founded in his name?

As your opening was false it doesn't say much for your intellect does it?"

Try reading 1 Corinthians 15:1-4; 2 Corinthians 5:21; Romans 5:8; 1 John 2:2; 1 Corinthians 15:12-34. Ephesians 2:20 tells us that Christianity was "built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus Himself as the chief cornerstone." See also Matthew 28:18-20; Acts 1:8 and Revelation 5:9-10.

The rather obvious fact that you haven't bothered to read the Bible, or provide a source for your assertion, says far more about your "intellect" than mine.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

A lot of people try reading the bible, but when the prologue (genesis) has so many plot holes and retcons it makes the twilight saga seems like quality material, they give up in disgust.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

Ever try reading Revelation while considering that the author might be in the last stages of dying of syphilis, and describing the events that were visible to him just outside his jail cell on Patmos? It makes a lot more sense if you do.

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"I'm going to hell."

Objection. Assumes location not in evidence.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"Try reading 1 Corinthians [...]"

Most of those references are letters written by Paul.

Christianity and much of its dogma was created by Paul. Later bishops selectively edited the various collected texts into one book. People like Saint Jerome and Saint Augustine added more "moral" proscriptions that are now central to the Churches' core fetish of "sin".

None of them actually knew Jesus Christ.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"Ever try reading Revelation while considering that the author might be in the last stages of dying of syphilis..."
No, but I have thought ergotism (Saint Anthony's Fire) and think it far more likely. The first written records of a syphilis outbreak of in Europe occurred in the late 15th C at Naples during the French invasion. There has been much effort in attempting to establish a European rather than North American origin of the disease, but I remain unconvinced.

Personally I have never been able to make any sense of Revelation, nor any of the proffered explanations for its inclusions.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"A lot of people try reading the bible..."
Indeed. What I find intriguing is the god-botherers who knock on my door from time to time. They want to convince me that it's the infallible word of god, yet when questioned about aspects of Leviticus (much more interesting than Genesis) they confess to having never read it.

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Re: "I'm going to hell."

"Objection. Assumes location not in evidence."
Overruled! The "hell" of the Bible is a rendition of the Hebrew sheol (the grave), or Greek Hades the place where dead people go.

OTOH if you had objected to heaven not being a place, then I would have agreed with you. I've always taken Jesus' words: "The Kingdom of Heaven is at hand" to mean it's here and now, not a location t some future time. In the words of Frank Zappa: "You'd better dig it while it's happening, because it might just be a one-shot deal."

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Anonymous Coward

You missed out that the Roman Catholic Church is #1 in organized peodophillia. 7% of all Australian priests have been accused of child-abuse. Presumably the other 93% were either directly involved in covering up the activities of the 7% and/or the other abusers who have not yet been caught, or guilty of negligence by not doing anything to stop the abuse. For this alone the Roman Catholic church needs to be broken up and dismantled as a criminal organization, if only to cover the costs of reparations to those who suffered.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

Most of those references are letters written by Paul.

Saul, who was a tax collector, heavily oppressed early Christians while Jesus was alive.

After they started growing as a cult, miraculously JC appeared to him on the road to Damascus (no-one else with him at the time saw or heard), and he turns up as a religious leader who no longer works and lives from the munificence of his worshippers.

At least most of the Koran actually comes from the Mobot himself. The bible is a bunch of stuff written by men who are not the original source, tens to hundreds of years after the events they talk of, edited even further hundreds more years later and selected in order to build a book of mostly coherent religion that suits their needs to control people.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"Saul, who was a tax collector, heavily oppressed early Christians while Jesus was alive."
Which makes it somewhat difficult to believe that Christianity didn't exist before he founded it.

"...in order to build a book of mostly coherent religion that suits their needs to control people"
Another possible explanation is that most people are so insecure in their beliefs they need to recruit others into it. The greater the number who believe, the more likely the belief's true.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

I don't believe the "originated in the New World" theory for syphilis is correct. For example, the first Crusaders late 11th C.) brought what they called "venereal leprosy" back from the Holy Land ... which was treated with mercury. Leprosy isn't sexually transmitted, nor is it treated with mercury. Syphilis is both, and I can see how the symptoms could be confused.

Granted, it was probably quite rare back then (perhaps a variation that wasn't as virulent as our more modern strain/mutation?) ...

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Re: "I'm going to hell."

The concept of "hell" does not equate to a simple translation of a Hebrew or Koine Greek word, and you know it. Stop being disingenuous for the sake of argument. It's beneath you.

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Re: Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity,

"The greater the number who believe, the more likely the belief's true."

That is total bullshit.

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Joke

Think that one was bad?

Just wait until you see the campaign they have lined up for Ramadan next year!

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Joke

Re: Think that one was bad?

They're having in Leslie Phillips to do the voiceover, and will be launching the Ramadan-a-Ding Dong.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Think that one was bad?

Edible bacon panties?

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Devil

Re: Think that one was bad?

Will the Christmas campaign involve Santa's sack in any way?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Think that one was bad?

A new sex doll called dan?

Think about it and then the potential slogan.

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Unhappy

Re: Think that one was bad?

"Edible bacon panties?"
Don't bother. They're not real bacon...

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Re: Think that one was bad?

I already know what they have in store.

Strap-ons.

I just feel sorry for anyone called Dan.

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Re: Think that one was bad?

Fake bacon? Now THAT is sacrilege!

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Re: Think that one was bad?

"Fake bacon? Now THAT is sacrilege!"
We need to burn the bastards at the steak.

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Joke

Umm

The vernal equinox is about having the planting done and taking a party. And since its nice and warm and safe, making babies.

Now, I've a Roman Catholic upbringing and know full well that not only did the RC's steal the occasion but so have several other religions.

But these are sex toys, that encourage the user to NOT MAKE BABIES!!! OMG OFFENDED! Eostre will wilt your plants and leave your cattle barren!

/joke

Interesting to note that *only* one recipient complained. AND they took action. I wonder how many complaints they get that the ignore anyway.....

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Umm

"And since its nice and warm and safe, making babies."

In agrarian societies in northern Europe - was there really a "safe" time to produce babies? Unlike most useful animals the human gestation period takes too long to fit neatly into a year's seasons.

Conception at the Winter Solstice would possibly give the mother a tough few months in early pregnancy - but food would have become more plentiful later on when she was eating "to feed two" - and then while lactating immediately after the birth.

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Anonymous Coward

Anyone seen

the last part of "American Gods" ? ...

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Rubbing the holy bishop raw...

Radar Operator: Colonel, you better have a look at this radar.

Colonel: What is it, son?

Radar Operator: I don't know, sir, but it looks like a giant--

Jet Pilot: Dick! Dick, take a look out of starboard.

Co-Pilot: Oh my God, it looks like a huge--

Bird-Watching Woman: Pecker!

Bird-Watching Man: [raising binoculars] Where?

Bird-Watching Woman: Over there. What sort of bird is that? Oh goodness, it's not a bird, it's--

Army Sergeant: Privates! We have reports of an Unidentified Flying Object. It has a long, smooth shaft, complete with--

Baseball Umpire: Two balls!

[looking up from game]

Baseball Umpire: What is that? It looks just like an enormous--

Colonel: Johnson!

Radar Operator: Yes, sir?

Colonel: Get on the horn to British Intelligence and let them know about this.

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Facepalm

One person complained?!

That's like... an entire person complained!

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Paris Hilton

Re: One person complained?!

....and aren't they targeted ads? So if you get one...

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Re: One person complained?!

I'm betting the complainer didn't actually get the e-mail - He saw it in his wife's email. Hence, the wailing and gnashing of teeth.

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Anonymous Coward

So let me get this right...

...the will not be allowed to advertise any Christmas offers then?

Or do we now accept Christmas is just a money making scam, first invented by the Church, now run by the retail industry?

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Anonymous Coward

"Or do we now accept Christmas is just a money making scam, first invented by the Church, now run by the retail industry?"

The ancients were there before Christianity made their take-over bid. The Roman Saturnalia festival was basically everyone having a good time eating, drinking, gift giving, and basically making merry round the Winter Solstice. Over-consumption was the norm.

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FAIL

So, the UK has a problem with the jesus dildos too? Because here in the US, we have those.

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Anonymous Coward

"So, the UK has a problem with the jesus dildos too?"

Shades of the scene from the Ken Russell film "The Devils" (1971).

Did a Google. Was surprised that the Jackhammer Jesus was effectively a crucifix. Had imagined it would have been more like this (SFW) - with the upraised arm a la Rabbit.

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Anonymous Coward

Do whatever you like in the privacy of your home

But do not try to draw me into your delusion.

We have a PM that can't even accept her place in the universe, yet somehow people seem to trust her to run the country. Stop this shite.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Do whatever you like in the privacy of your home

"We have a PM that can't even accept her place in the universe, yet somehow people seem to trust her to run the country."

Someone coined the term "May-bot" to describe her communication style. Heard her on a R4 interview today. It was interesting how many times she answered a question about BREXIT by saying - "No deal is better than a bad deal". Reminded me of religious zealots who think that repeatedly quoting a phrase from their bible is a statement of unassailable blinding truth.

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WTF?

I'm shocked.

I've just read two pages of comments and not one person has asked if they received a stiff sentence.

Reg readers, I'm disappointed.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: I'm shocked.

Maybe they got a premature remission.

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Presumably the person who complained was on their mailing list so already a customer...

What an utter w*nker.

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Great decision

It should stay about the torture and execution of quite a nice bloke.

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“We considered the use of the religious holiday of Easter [Sic] to advertise a sex toy was likely to cause serious offence and concluded that it was therefore in breach of the Code,” the ASA added."

Really?

Not sure I understand this thinking, I would have thought Sex toys would have been entirely appropriate to the Eostre Festival, is it because Sex toys are thought to discourage skin on skin sex? I mean they could be used for fore play or something....

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