I'm a Mac/I'm a PC
The PC guys can dance like that, but the Mac should put on a hat and dance a tango with a gorgeous Argentinian burd.
Those of you who object to a) Microsoft, b) California and c) effusive Yanks gushing complete and utter cobblers are advised to look away now, because what follows is really going to put a downer on your day. Introducing Brad Slavin, who just happened to be in a shopping mall in Mission Viejo, unaware he was about to …
Spontaneous, you say? Oh, man. Give me a big, fat _break_, already. You actually cancelled a Mac order and bought a copy of Windows 7 because of _this_?
A bunch of multi-colored-shirted employees at a Microsoft store -- mind you, the company that gave us those wretched Seinfeld ads, and the Windows 7 Tupperware Parties -- suddenly "spontaneously" bust out into the clappy dance? It looks like something taught to people at those weird-assed, cultlike corporate management training retreats -- you know, right after the Falling-Backward-While-Trusting-People-To-Catch-You exercise, and the firewalking exercise.
Maa-aaan, that is some of the creepiest shit I've seen in a while, even from Microsoft's marketing department; I didn't last more than a minute before I had to stop it. Mind you, some of the "geniuses" at the Apple shops can get annoying in their own special way (and I've been using the OS Of The Gods since 1985), but at least for the most part they're actually busy helping customers figure stuff out instead of performing crass, shallow stunts.
Jayzus, that's some nasty shit. Looks like they could stand to be taught another dance -- a long-time favorite dance of mine: the Fish-Slapping Dance.
That wasn't a _real_ diner, but likely one of the cheap simulacra that are springing up all over the States, now that the yuppies have discovered diners (along with dive bars, which are being similarly ruined). Luckily, you got to fly back home to Britain, and I'm stuck _here_.
If it were a _real_ diner, the most effusive marketing would've been in the form of a waitress who may have been a real hottie in her youth, but who's now in her fifties, wearing a uniform just a bit too tight, who hovers over you while asking in a husky, rasping, pack-a-day voice, "Hi, what can I get for ya' hon'?"
Oh, and btw: the British, stuffy? Excuse me, but would this be the same Britain who gave us The Ministry Of Silly Walks, and a certain Mr. Anderson who plays the flute while dancing on one leg?
Yeah, I guess there's a chance of that, but, still... this _is_ Microsoft we're talking about, here. This had all the spontanaiety of the scene in "Fame" where we're all expected to believe that a bunch of performing-arts students would spontaneously burst out into the streets, doing all their moves exactly right while dancing on cars. These sales droids all knew the moves. They all knew when to clap and chant "Microsoft!" -- and, they put that redhead in the green t-shirt with the admirable knockers right in the front row, where people in the mall could see her.
The only thing missing here was Steve Ballmer himself bursting in from the back of the store, armpit-stained, sweat-flecked bald head glistening, jumping and skipping grotesquely through the crowd while bellowing, "I...love...this...COMPANY!"
Pint Of Lager Icon -- only because there's no Pint Of Stout icon, which I'm going to need several of if I expect to kill off all the brain cells which are storing the memory of having seen this video.
Am I the only one waiting for the remix with the chorus “Developers, Developers?” I once saw a balding fat guy who could chant that ...perhaps they could get him. He could rush all madcap through the matix, bouncing pinball style off of various happy dancers, vaulting tables of product.
I saw a bunch of kids dancing at the local Wendy’s years back; perhaps this is them, grown up and desperate--but I seem to remember the Wendy’s kids having better moves.
A viral campaign for the textbooks.
I watched nearly the whole thing. It was just a few employees dancing, and few customers joined in. Okay, this thing was obviously planned (you don't have that many employees in a store that only has a few boxes of different stock) and everything the blogger says it more than suspect. He probably set up the recording in advance knowing it was going to happen, or was sent it by someone else who did.
I'm betting he isn't even a paid shill, he just does it because his personal obsession is with MS and so he is a little loose with the truth where they are concerned.
It's probably just part of a team building exercise, new store, a load of people who don't know each other, gets the morale up. Then the manager decides they should do it in the store rather than just the hired hotel conference room. A bit embarrassing maybe, but not even in the same league as watching your dad at a wedding after a few beers.
So the result? Loads of Reg readers cringed at the video and sent it to their friends or told them about it, MS gets more publicity again. Unpaid, "it'll never happen to me", unknowing shills, the lot of you.
So okay the only way to do it was to switch off the sound and minimise the window.
But I *knew* it was still there wibbling and wobbling away in brightly-coloured SoCal Ballmervision - and that must count for something.
After that I think I need some quality fare - something like the complete Steven Seagal collection, played backwards with a Swedish dub.
(BTW. I think we need a special, extra-large FAIL icon for occasions like this)
Of course, there is another possibility here that people have missed - Mr. Slavin is a shill for Apple trying to pass this all off in an endeavour to further the absolute fail that is the Apple marketing campaign. I certainly wouldn't put it past Jobs' Mob to attempt something like this in an attempt to bash on Microsoft further.
To be perfectly honest, I'm so sick and tired of the Apple TV commercials that it's beyond words. The smugness of the "I'm a Mac" person, and the way they try to pass off the "I'm a PC" person is idiotic.
Just the other day I looked at Windows 7 and my life began to change. The sun pierced the clouds just for me, the boil on my knee fell to the ground, and I got back my hand that I lost in the war. Now that Bill Gates is gone MS stopped making products for people and now make for Angels.
Americans are like puppies, particularly these children, who demonstrate quite clearly that the employment policies and personalities of CEOs and other senior personnel are shown in the quality and behaviour of their staff.
Paris, because she is, like, soooooo american.
Missing you already.
we have massive unemployment, massive debt, get electricity from other countries and cant fend for ourselves but its videos like these that make me proud to be British, we stay professional at all times and don't reverts into a bunch of primary school wannabe actors when we're in work
all of the people in this video should be sacked
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