back to article Millionaire-backed science fiction church to launch Scientology TV network

The Church of Scientology, founded by sci-fi author L Ron Hubbard, is set to start broadcasting its own TV programmes tonight. The Scientology Network is due to start broadcasting on Roku, AppleTV, FireTV and the Apple and Android app stores at 8pm Eastern time (or midnight for UK viewers). The network’s website and Twitter …

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"24x7 Hypno-Toad"

And BattleStar Gallactica.

For the Scilons...

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Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

A cult is a small unpopular religion.

A religion is a large popular cult.

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Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

"what primarily defines a cult has several aspects to it:"

So for instance the Catholic Church?

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Everything you never wanted to know about sect's, and were forced to find out...

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Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

How many Bears do you think they have in Egypt & the Middle East anyway?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

Being bald myself, I heartily approve of the last one.

Nowadays of course, thanks to social media, it's easy to find 41 friends you don't particularly care about, or for that matter even know.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "Islam is the only sect"

'WRONG.

Go back and relearn what a sect is.'

sect: a group of people with somewhat different religious beliefs (typically regarded as heretical) from those of a larger group to which they belong.

Sooo, taking Judaism as the root religion here (we won't delve into the mire that is proto-Judaism), Christianity is a Judaic sect, the notable bones of contention being that Judaism rejects the Christ character being the Judaic Messiah and as to that whole meshuge 'son of God' business...

Now Islam, that's funnier, as they accept that the character known as Christ is one of their prophets, and only a prophet, you might be tempted to regard them as a Christian sect, but as they also regard the Christ character as the Judaic Messiah minus all that 'Son of God' nonsense the Christians attach to that word, then they could be more properly regarded as a Judaic sect.

You almost got there when you wrote 'Islam, Judaism and Christianism all hold to the Old Testament. They have that in common.', more or less stated there that Islam and Christianity are Judaic sects as the Old Testament stuff is theirs.

A sect doesn't just have to be a small bunch of 'relidges'

Scientology is a sect..

Ah, I see, no, the word you're apparently looking for here is cult, their 'mythos' is a somewhat unique (and heavily copyrighted and trademarked..) mishmash of 'Golden Age' pulp SF, cod psychology and fin de siècle occultism, you'd have to stretch the definition of sect pretty far to even begin to make the Sciloons an offshoot of the O.T.O. or any other group that LRH may (or may not) have infiltrated/been a member of.

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Windows

Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

@AC sucked into the current war on terror islam is bad terror TERROR TERROR PEADOS!!! fear mongering by the folks that brought you Agent Orange and the F-35.

I will point out that there are extremists in *all* religions, and many of them are active in many religions right now, if one pays attention to world news

The 'old testaments' are the link that tie dozens of variations of religions together and turn them into disasters. Wafting the 'new testaments' about and calling them the repudiation of the old testaments indicates that you are a devout of one or another christian church, and have not spent the time to read them, since there are equally vile segments in the new testaments.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "Islam is the only sect"

"In other words, it's definitely NOT only a small percentage of Muslims who hold extreme views."

What about the Muslims and similar foreigners in say the UK?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "Islam is the only sect"

"Now Islam, that's funnier,"

The background of the Koran and associated fiction was a direct rip-off of early Christianity with a bit of spicing up to suit. e.g. 4 wives allowed, etc.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

"The 'old testaments' are the link that tie dozens of variations of religions together and turn them into disasters."

And storing them like a toilet roll and calling them the "Torah" doesn't change that.

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Stop

Battlestar Galactica (TOS at least) was pretty obviously based on Mormonism (Kobol/Kolob etc.).

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Anonymous Coward

Re: "Islam is the only sect"

'The background of the Koran and associated fiction was a direct rip-off of early Christianity with a bit of spicing up to suit. e.g. 4 wives allowed, etc.'

Aye, but the problem is do you then treat Islam then as a breakaway Christian sect (which, I've been told by a Muslim friend, is a rather good way to start an argument/holy war depending on how tolerant the Muslim is you posit this to) or as just another contemporary-to-what-became-Christianity Judaic sect which segued into Islam with Mohammed at the helm, one which quite happily accepted the whole Judaic Messiah bit about the character known as Jesus, but balked on the whole 'Avatar of Yahweh' thing? (People's Front of Judea as opposed to Judean People's Front..)

Re the 4 wives, historically Judaism has always been a bit weird on polygamy, it wasn't totally proscribed as far as I can remember (unlike polyandry, which was) but was permitted for a whole bunch of specific reasons, and from what I can remember Christianity went down the monogamy road early on when it became Romanised (as the Romans were on the whole monogamous)..though ISTR there was some (belatedly) continued fun about the subject after the Reformation amongst the Protestant churches...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

"Not to mention that Christians don't go around beheading people or killing former believers. "

ummmm...

Northern Ireland?

Eric Rudolph in the US?

Central African Republic?

Note that I'm not trying to deny that any Islamic-fundamentalist based violence exists (but you're asking us to believe that Christian violance. Nor am I trying to argue that the verses need to be taken at face value (but we're supposed to take Koran readings at face value).

Here's a curve ball for your melon: which US president said the following quote?

"I also want to speak tonight directly to Muslims throughout the world. We respect your faith. It's practiced freely by many millions of Americans, and by millions more in countries that America counts as friends. Its teachings are good and peaceful, and those who commit evil in the name of Allah blaspheme the name of Allah. The terrorists are traitors to their own faith, trying, in effect, to hijack Islam itself."

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Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

"How many Bears do you think they have in Egypt & the Middle East anyway?"

Not too many. But do they have the right to arm bears there? That might have a bearing on the matter.

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Headmaster

Scilons?

Surely Cylons?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath

and all the protestant churces from the Wee Free onwards

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"Rumored"?

Wasn't Hubbard specifically quoted as setting up scientology specifically to be a money-making operation?

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Re: "Rumored"?

"Writing for a penny a word is ridiculous. If a man really wants to make a million dollars, the best way would be to start his own religion."

As quoted in the article "Scientology: Anatomy of a Frightening Cult" by Eugene H. Methvin.

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WTF?

I hope it's a subscription channel

So I can file under NOPE!

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Re: I hope it's a subscription channel

So... Um whos holding the Gun to your Gulliver, forceing you to watch this? Last I heard it was only on the Internet.

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Anonymous Coward

Have just read "Strange Angel" by George Pendle; it's a biography of Jack Parsons who was a pioneering rocket experimenter in the 30s and 40s. As well as working to develop JATO for the US Army he was a follower of Aleister Crowley the 'magician' and cult founder. Hubbard is one of the interesting people he met in Pasadena. According to the book, Hubbard pinched Parson's girlfriend and $20k.

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Joke

Adverts for holidays

Does anyone think the station will have adverts for Tom Cruises?

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Gimp

Re: Adverts for holidays

'Fancy a short break? Book a Tom Cruise today - you'll be smiling!!'

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Coat

Re: Adverts for holidays

One good thing about them...they're very short.

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Re: Adverts for holidays

Tom Cruises

do they stray outside the closet?

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Re: Adverts for holidays

"Tom Cruises

do they stray outside the closet?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQ4xvTK2FLI

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SVV
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Hmmm, who's broadcasting this shite?

" The Scientology Network is due to start broadcasting on Roku, AppleTV, FireTV and the Apple and Android app stores"

Well, that's a relief then. They certain won't reach any gullible fools who are willing to part with their money for crap by broadcasting on THOSE platforms!

It'll probably be on Freeview before long, what whith there already apparently being space in the limited bandwidth for cheesy unbelievangelical cash hungry preacher channels, jewelery tat emporiums, RT, etc.........

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Re: Hmmm, who's broadcasting this shite?

Except it's STREAMING. Broadcast is quite a different thing, only using identical data for everyone and rather rare outside a LAN. WiFi has to do it by duplicating the UDP stream for each client unless some newer version has added a true broadcast mode. Also with Broadcast there is only linear scheduling and everyone has same data at the same time (+/- distribution latency).

LTE's broadcast mode is really a customised DTT so as to sell Scheduled Broadcast PayTV if Ofcom manages to sell off all terrestrial TV spectrum. Qualcomm did a Broadcast trial for Mobile in UK. Nokia long ago had a handset with DVB-h and there were some handsets in Germany with DVB-t, but neither mobile operators, regulators or phone makers can get revenue from DVB-T in a phone.

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Anonymous Coward

Great news, I might get to see Battlefield Earth the series.

Said absolutely no one ever.

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Great news, I might get to see Battlefield Earth the series.

Mehh, anything to bury that awful movie...!!

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Great news, I might get to see Battlefield Earth the series.

Time for my favourite New York Times review! Written in May 2000:

"It may be a bit early to make such judgements, but ''Battlefield Earth'' may well turn out to be the worst movie of this century."

http://www.nytimes.com/movie/review?res=9C05EEDF173BF931A25756C0A9669C8B63

We're 18 years in now and his prediction seems to be holding up pretty well...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Great news, I might get to see Battlefield Earth the series.

You may be right however we have since then had Catwoman.

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Re: Great news, I might get to see Battlefield Earth the series.

"It may be a bit early to make such judgements, but ''Battlefield Earth'' may well turn out to be the worst movie of this century." ..... We're 18 years in now and his prediction seems to be holding up pretty well... .... AC

A Series of Blockbusting Blockbuster Remakes with Straplines Engaged to Mobilise the English Language and Send IT into Battles is more than just an HyperRadioProACTive IT AI Field on Earth, for such also Commands and Controls Almighty Forces with Superb Sublimely Secret Sources in Cyber Spaces and every Nook and Cranny of Virtual Places too.

From Novel Advanced IntelAIgents, there is No Known or Available Hiding Place. Not Anywhere Ever.

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Devil

Re: Great news, I might get to see Battlefield Earth the series.

"You may be right however we have since then had Catwoman all of those movies that get Oscars because nobody would ever watch them, otherwise."

fixed.

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Join new group alt.talk.scientology?

What a day....

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Coat

I thought the only thing left on Usenet was pornography and abuse. Oh, wait..

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I know where it won't be seen.

Is scientology still on Germany's shit list ?

Will their transmissions be checked for subliminal messages?

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Re: I know where it won't be seen.

Yes and Germany is continuing to search for ways to sue them out of Germany and preferably all of Europe. This cult also appears to be big in Sweden and in Denmark.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: I know where it won't be seen.

'Yes and Germany is continuing to search for ways to sue them out of Germany and preferably all of Europe.'

Damn!, a wild sensible reason for staying in the EU finally appears....

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I thought...

I thought Xenu and the Thetans were a rock band...

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Anonymous Coward

Battle of the Extremes

Scientology TV vs. One America News. Go!

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Can't fault their record keeping

Sometime about 1983 or so, I was hanging about downtown with a group of mates when we were approached by a group of attractive, chesty young ladies.

We did what any young man would do and followed them to their office, where the scam was soon revealed. Disappointment ensued, but we had learned a lesson.

Curiously, last year, (34 year later maybe?) an envelope arrived at my house containing a brochure on time keeping and two letters written in Chinese on Scientology letterhead which raised a couple of questions.

First of all, my surname might be construed as Chinese, but isn't. I asked a Chinese colleague if he could tell me what the letters said, but he seemed to think they were either written by a small child or someone who was learning Chinese.

Second question: 34 years later I have moved house lots of times, how did they track me down? Also, why?

Weird.

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Re: Can't fault their record keeping

I'd think that's no different than other spam "tracking you down"

I'm sure they can buy dodgy address lists like anybody else.

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Re: Can't fault their record keeping

True. I'm on the electoral roll also now I think of it.

Still, 34 years is a long time.

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Trollface

Re: Can't fault their record keeping

you might try taping the envelope to a brick, writing "return to sender" on it, and making sure that it arrives at their office with postage due...

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Can't fault their record keeping

'Second question: 34 years later I have moved house lots of times, how did they track me down?'

Your obviously nasty engrams man, It would not surprise me that they've developed an e-meter equipped version of the fabled TV detector van...

It's Audit time boyo...do not resist, you've had 34 years to save up the thousands of £$€ required of thee¹, you know Xenu does not want you to be clear..so become OT8! (only $277,010, give or take...and boy, do the Co$ know how to take)

¹ Serious point, they've the infrastructure to find out exactly how much you're worth..no profit in trying to milk a dry cow after all.

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Re: Can't fault their record keeping

It took me many years to shake the bastards off after I was stupid enough to agree to read a copy of Dianetics handed to me by someone I'd always thought of as a friend. That he then charged me for the book should have given me pause but I was so taken aback I actually paid him.

They kept sending me letters asking me my thoughts on the book. I think they eventually gave up after I told them that, though it made lousy toilet paper, I'd finally managed to finish it without reading a word.

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Dianetics, the book

It was alleged, probably by Heinlen, that the book 'Dianetics' which started Scientology, was plagiarized by Elron. He had found a copy of a book in a 2nd hand shop in Paris, this had been written by a frenchman in the early 1930s and had been self published with a print run of just a 100 or so, most of which hadn't sold. Elron's Dianetics is primarily a translation of that.

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Anonymous Coward

Theme Song For The Scientology Network

Dianetics Uhh Uh

Dianetics Uhh Uh

Some people think it funny but it's really rather runny.

Dianetics Uhh Uh

Dianetics Uhh Uh

Tom Cruise knows it's there cuz he checked his underwear...

Dianetics Uhh Uh

Dianetics Uhh Uh

No Pain No Strain Flush those Thetans Down the Drain

Dianetics Uhh Uh

Dianetics Uhh Uh

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