back to article The Register's entirely serious New Year's resolutions for 2016

We launched as an email newsletter in 1994, hit the web four years later and are now a multinational media entity operating on three continents. Millions of people read us every month, which is humbling. We may have missed our birthday, but did do some proper “we've turned 21 and that means we're probably quite grown up now” …

Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

the comments were fun though

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Anonymous Coward

@Thought About IT /Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

This is the very first time I ever, *ever* down-voted a comment here. ('cos I used to think the bronze-silver-gold badge scheme was due to up-votes vs. down-votes, innit).

So the dude disagreed with _you ? Whoa, get over it, this *was* the Register we were talking about, *wasn't* it ??

btw / fwiw - I was a 'warmist' until I saw this ...

arctic.atmos.uiuc.edu/cryosphere/IMAGES/global.daily.ice.area.withtrend.jpg

makes ya wonder, doesn't it ?

And to the editoriat, do you really think it's better to apologise after doing something, rather than seek consensus beforehand ? Really ?? Should have listened to Disraeli - "never apologise, never explain" ... Why ? I might have been happier not knowing ... as it is, I'm off to check out the Inquirer ...

PS: that graph at Alexa says more than any of us could have done ...

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Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

@ <shakes head>

"anyone know where they went, as I would quite like to follow"

Tim- http://www.forbes.com/sites/timworstall/

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Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

@ Pat Att

"Remember him saying how well the nuclear power stations were holding up in Japan following the tsunami? Laughable!"

And shockingly true. Just as his articles about wind farms failing badly were ahead of the BBC by months if not a yr (and then the BBC politely and barely noted the failure that was). His showing up of NASA when they swiftly took down their 'adjusted' graph. Exposing the MMCC science silencing at the BBC. You may not like his articles, nor like his views but he did hit some good home runs in the process. If I wanted to read the 'sanitised' versions of actual news I would read the many other sources.

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Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

Lewis, I don't know I'm afraid. Seen some stuff in the Telegraph from him. I'm at Forbes, as I ever was, plus there's my blog at myname.com

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Pint

Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

I stopped reading El Reg almost a decade ago as I couldn't stand that Orlowski / Page conspiracist nonsense about AGW. As others have said, denying basic science is best left to the many US-based loony sites, along with 9/11 truthers, birthers, black helicopters and all the rest of it. Having dipped back once or twice in the last few months I've been encouraged to see no more of that rubbish and am now reading El Reg again, and greatly enjoying the original non-bullshit, funny sub-heads, in-jokes about Jesus phones and fondleslabs, excellent signal:noise in the comments, and all the rest of it. Bravo, keep it up, have a beer.

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Re: Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

Rubbish. Your google searchterm starter for ten is "GCM skillfulness hindcast". Maybe you should have read up on the science a bit more when you (claim) to have been working on models. (Where was that BTW - Hadley, or the UEA?)

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Re: RE:"The tech angle"

being able to paste the shortened form of a journal name doesn't mean you know anything about the science, either -- in fact, you demonstrably know nothing about it, from the howlers in your comment.

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Re: @Thought About IT /Page and Worstall "moved on" in the Autumn, right?

makes ya wonder, doesn't it ?
Only if you're profoundly ignorant of basic climatology.

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Anonymous Coward

Can we have some cat videos please?

I find it very frustrating to have to keep changing tabs every few minutes.

Thanks

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Headmaster

I think that should be 'Can we haz some cat videos'.

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"I find it very frustrating to have to keep changing tabs every few minutes."

I find it very frustrating to have to keep changing tabbies every few minutes - shirley

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"I find it very frustrating to have to keep changing tabbies every few minutes - shirley"

I do not want to know what you're doing to those cats if you have to change them every few minutes...

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@Alien8n

I hope it isn't like the Bear and Rabbit.

Bear to the rabbit, "Does shit stick to your fur?" Rabbit, no, "I never have that problem." The bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass....

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Devil

I find it very frustrating to have to keep changing tabbies every few minutes - shirley

"...Don't call me Shirley"

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Bear to the rabbit, "Does shit stick to your fur?" Rabbit, no, "I never have that problem." The bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass....

Then what happened to the donkey?

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When I wipe my arse, I want to use something that the turds will stick to. Otherwise it'll just remain stuck to me......

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> I find it very frustrating to have to keep changing tabbies every few minutes

I still have my somewhat procrustean tabby TYVM. Even if she is somewhat metal-enhanced as well as tail-light..

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Anonymous Coward

Re: what happened to the donkey?

Lewis P wrote a book about it.

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Careful

The serious consideration of the world unleavened by levity would be a particularly dull place.

I can understand why you would want to curb adolescent excess (knob jokes etc), but a failure to include humour (whether irony, sarcasm, or punning) would mark you down as poor writers.

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Re: Careful

Indeed. I'll happily put up with a few jokes that drop flat as they hit the wrong side of sexism (for example) in return for many that don't.

On the other hand a more PC approach will see me move on, which may or may not concern you.

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Re: Careful

> I can understand why you would want to curb adolescent excess

Shit, are they sacking Lester as well?

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Change is not always good, as the wrecked Guardian and BBC websites attest. I admit that they look good on my smartphone but 90% of my reading is on a full Desktop GUI and they look like a cross between Hello! magazine and a child's colouring book.

I also miss the Weekend edition. It made the best use of MY resources. I suppose when you don't pay for content you get what you are given. There are some advantages to the subscription model of both web content and software.

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TRT
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You are the correct.

They hurtz my eyezes those websites now. I've stopped reading them.

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as the wrecked Guardian and BBC websites attest

OMG! You're right. The Wreck of the Graun is the ghost of Christmas future for the Reg!

The article says as much - the same obsessive anglophone internationalisation with suitable hat tipping to cultural diversity and non-anglophone cultures, the same lightweight content aggregation, the inability to find a f***ing thing, the whole "lets not offend anybody" ethos.

All we're waiting on is a new web design, and we all know what web designers do to previously fully functioning web sites. Ooh, and more moderation of the forums, because we wouldn't want any naughty words to be set free on the web, would we?

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Unhappy

I thoroughly Enjoyed the weekend edition, I also presume that you will be ditching Alistair Dabs then to conform with your changes, I don't think he able to be conform to your new rule set.

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Not sure about the Guardian, most of what I've read on there seems well written, but the BBC appears to be written by school kids and semi-literate bloggers nowadays. The sheer number of grammatical and spelling errors I see in almost every news article is astounding considering this is supposed to be the best news site in the world.

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Re: You are the correct.

@TRT

Throw Wired in with that lot too.... I don't even bother if I see the link leads to Wired.

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The following short Stylish entry considerably improves my BBC experience - no doubt I could do better if I could be bothered..

@namespace url(http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml);

@-moz-document domain('bbc.co.uk') {

* { font-size: small !important; }

div.albatross__image { display: none !important; }

div.cormorant-item__image { display: none !important;}

div.pigeon-item__image { display: none !important;}

div.sparrow-item__image { display: none !important;}

div[class='swift faux-block-link'] {display: none !important;}

}

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@Alien8n

I''ve a collection of screen grabs from the BBC mobile App. Appallingly badly written, incorrect and generally screwed up news reports. It grows at a rate of at least one a day. The BBC mobile App rewrite made me turn off iOS app updates, and forced me to delve into the nether regions of getting older versions of apps back from the iTunes gut-store. I'm sticking with my 2011 news app as long as I can, but no doubt they'll ditch the XML stream that it hooks into at some point. It already gets balky about the aggregated headline articles for some reason.

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Re: You are the correct.

>Throw Wired in with that lot too.... I don't even bother if I see the link leads to Wired.

The only decent thing Wired has done of late is to syndicate articles from, and thus bring my attention to: https://www.quantamagazine.org/

Now I just go straight there and skip Wired.

Quanta Magazine is an editorially independent online publication launched by the Simons Foundation to enhance public understanding of science.

Our reporters focus on developments in mathematics, theoretical physics, theoretical computer science and the basic life sciences. The best traditional news organizations provide excellent reporting on developments in health, medicine, technology and engineering. We strive to complement and augment existing media coverage, not compete with it.

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" ironic sexism"

Does this mean we'll see an end to the moronic use of "she" and "her" in articles rather than the more appropriate gender neutral terms?

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Facepalm

Quite the opposite, I suspect and fear.

Where's 80s coder when you need that headstone? --->

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Megaphone

"Them" and "their"?

Not seeing your own $segment_of_society as the default for everything is not the same as your $segment_of_society being discriminated against. But until your $segment_of_society has been discriminated against, people often don't understand that. It's called privilege and most of us who work in this field are lucky enough to be born into at least some of it - nothing wrong with that but if we assume that our $segment_of_society is the default, we exclude people who don't belong to it and we probably do that without even meaning to.

It's not political correctness, it's just good manners.

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Joke

Why? Some of the most high profile computer programmers are women. Remember Mel in Dr Who, played by Bonnie Langford? Surely a role model of modern time!

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>Does this mean we'll see an end to the moronic use of "she" and "her" in articles rather than the more appropriate gender neutral terms?

Didn't we play out this discussion a couple of months back? Just saying.

You can make a hypothetical physicist any damn sex you want, and hell, Alice and Bob stories are easier to parse for having a mix of pronouns. Example:

Andrew tripped over Bob's desk and spilt his tea over his book. Ambiguous. Whereas:

Alice tripped over Bob's desk and spilt her tea over his book.

Alice tripped over Bob's desk and spilt her tea over her book.

Alice tripped over Bob's desk and spilt his tea over her book.

Alice tripped over Bob's desk and spilt his tea over his book.

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Anonymous Coward

Don't forget Lottie Dexter

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Pint

I have been reading El Reg almost every day since about 2000. And what keep me coming back is the subtle British humorous tone in all the articles. Well, no so subtle sometimes.

But is not only that, with the humor you manage to pass genuine information, clear criticism and straight facts. I believe that is your essence, don't loose it.

Anyway, here is to many more years of El Reg!

R

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Loose?

As in 'loose women'?

Or, do you mean 'lose', as in 'loser'.

And don't get me started on 'could care less'! I'm quite capable of getting myself started on that one, and I really could not care less whether you care, or not!

Should I have written all of that in capitals?

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Joke

@Rodrigo Valenzuela

Subtle, British and humorous in the same sentence! I think you win some sort of award for that!

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Re: Loose?

Should of, shirley.

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So the new formula is:

Storage

Storage

Hyperconvergence (sic)

Clouds

Buzzword infested Guest Advertorial

Safe space for wimmin humour

Storage

Industry Mergers

Docker

Storage

...with an extra side order of, yes ...you guessed it: Storage

...all important stuff (bar the advertorials), but a pretty dull place if you're more interested in chip families, operating systems, compilers, DC operations etc.

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Re: So the new formula is:

Hopefully better than the random story generator that the Daily Mail use.

$clickbait = array("UKIP","Immigrant", "ISIS", "Muslim", "Funniest Ever Video", "Greatest Ever", "Biggest")

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Re: So the new formula is:

You forgot to wrap it up in the cloud.

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Re: So the new formula is:

DevOps advertorial about software nobody needs but some managers think might be cool.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: So the new formula is:

"Hopefully better than the random story generator that the Daily Mail use."

You forgot "All grown up", "paedo pitchfork waving" - displayed side by side.

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Re: So the new formula is:

You missed out:

Articles re-published from The Conversation

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Stop

Re: Articles re-published from The Conversation

If El Reg continue with that stupidity, they should balance it with re-published BishopHill articles.

The time I spend here reading articles resembles the previously posted Alexa:

http://oi65.tinypic.com/2lcsdbl.jpg

ie it has nose-dived since Lewis was dropped as Editor - who is the new editor?

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Unhappy

@Lysenko -- Re: So the new formula is:

You forgot one.... reprints lifted from "The Conversation".... <yawn>

Edit... Doctor Syntax beat me to it... oh well. Mayhaps someone will read the comments and tally my displeasure at those articles.

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