back to article 'Dear Daddy...' Max Zuckerberg’s Letter back to her Father

Yesterday Mark Zuckberg accompanied the birth of his first child, a daughter Max, with a long open letter. Thanks to the miracle of modern technology, we've found what Max might write back, and we're sharing it with you: Dear Daddy Thank you for the letter that your PR and public policy team wrote to mark my Birth, and sent to …

Anonymous Coward

Most charities are way more inefficient than governments. There is no legal barrier to a charity spending most of what it earns on salaries and expenses if it wants to, and some major charities in the UK, like Age UK and the British Heart Foundation spend way less than half of donations on their actual charitable activities. I recommend this article for example, if you're not aware of the facts.

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inserting the corruption and inefficiency of government into charit

Most charity appears to do more harm than good, when the donations do anything at all. Remember Haiti earthquake relief? Introduced endemic cholera to the island, little benefit for the people. The Red Cross's half billion $ accomplished essentially nothing. "Much of the money never reached people in need."

It is starting to look like charity organizations are just a scam.

As for the girl's inheritance, Zuck likely has 60 years left in him. Disregarding the extraction of real money out of paper wealth and the slings and arrows of that much outrageous fortune, she'll have the benefit of the whole lot for as long as it is likely to be important to her.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: inserting the corruption and inefficiency of government into charit

Most charities are way more inefficient than governments.

Citations please. If true, that's really fucking sad.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: inserting the corruption and inefficiency of government into charit

It is starting to look like charity organizations are just a scam.

Charity organisations have been a scam in many countries for a long time. The Red Cross in Australia for example.:

* When building a new HQ in Melbourne... yeah, you guessed it... multi-storey, multi-million $$$ construction, marble floors, plush exec offices, etc.

* Meanwhile, the same crowd does a "blanket drive" (asking for blankets for the poor/homeless from the public) during a cold winter. A close family member watched them literally dump trucks full of blankets at a nearby rubbish tip because "they cost too much to transport". Meanwhile they're still running the ads, and other cities Red Cross' are asking for blankets. I call "bullshit" on the marble flooring compared to (say) linoleum then. Screw those corrupt fuckkas. ;)

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Re: inserting the corruption and inefficiency of government into charit

The Sunday Age is reporting that Shane Warne’s charitable foundation is under investigation by the consumer watchdog over concerns about financial and reporting practices.

They have revealed “The Shane Warne Foundation raised $1.8 million in three years but donated an average of only 16 cents of every dollar to institutions that care for sick and underprivileged children… instead spending the majority of its funds from 2011 to 2013 staging glitzy celebrity events and employing a member of the cricketing great’s family.”

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"That's great, and in a way is in a long tradition of american philanthropism."

Yeah, screw everyone and be ruthless till you're so rich you are untouchable then become a philanthropist to "buy your way into heaven". See Carnegie et al.

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He has given nothing 'away'

1. setup a taxfree charity.

2. transfer all assets, that 'were' taxable to said charity.

3. Make yourself head of charity

4. Get all your expenses paid by the charity via various other tax dodges.

5. Make yourself look really cool to anybody who is incapable of adding numbers, where numerical total is greater than said individuals number of fingers.

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Re: inserting the corruption and inefficiency of government into charit

Yes and no.

MSF seem quite efficient.

I always look at a charity's income/outgoings before I decide.

There are quite a few efficient charities - most of them tend not to be the sort that have government links/chats/lunches - doers rather than talkers.

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Amazing

How come the conception, morning sickness and birth weren't on farcebook?

THAT would be the way to launch little Max on the world.

I wish her all the best with her life but can't help but feel a little sad for a kid to be born to such a schmuck. There again perhaps fatherhood will change him for the better in spite of the first evidence.

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Re: Amazing

Maybe they were...

Would you have seen it?

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Devil

Re: Amazing

no, no I would have not. El Reg forums are as social as I get.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Amazing

I wish her all the best with her life but ...

Anyone know if being a sociopath is inheritable? If so, does that mean there's (not knowing his wife) 50/50 chance of being as bad as him?

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Re: Amazing

As if growing up with a boy's first name wasn't bad enough, this little girl is going to have to grow up with everyone _always_ linking her to facebook before anything else. She has approximately zero chance of growing up 'normal'.

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Anonymous Coward

In a filing to the US Securities and Exchange Commision, Facebook said that Mr Zuckerberg "plans to sell or gift no more than $1bn of Facebook stock each year for the next three years and that he intends to retain his majority voting position...for the foreseeable future.

99% my arse.

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If Facebook goes the way of MySpace, $1Bn might be his entire holding in a few years.

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Anonymous Coward

We can hope.

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Bah!

Oh crap, a new dad with internet access. Look for daily postings on stuff you either don't want to know or already assimilated, dealt with and learned not to throw up while doing when you had your own baby years ago.

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Her name

Reminds me of The Simpsons, season 10 episode 13

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Re: Her name

I wondered whether her middle name would be "Headroom"...

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Re: Her name

Max Power? The setting on a hair dryer?

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Anonymous Coward

Hypocrit

If Zuckerburg was serious about the greater good, he could start by contributing his fair share to general taxation.

Last year I personally contributed about 5 times more than his Facebook company did towards running hospitals, schools, social services etc in the UK.

I don't resent me paying but I really resent Zuckerberg's Facebook NOT paying. It may be legal but it is not moral. And before anybody mentions the duty to shareholders, he is the main shareholder !

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The usual taxation sob story: IMMA HELPING POOR WIDOWS

running hospitals, schools, social services etc in the UK

You misspelled "bombing sandpeople" and "shifting money to well-connected, overly rich, IP-loving companies for shit services rendered". HTH.

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Megaphone

Re: The usual taxation sob story: IMMA HELPING POOR WIDOWS

I always thought it would be good if the Government only had direct control over 50%* of taxes collected. The other half... when you put in your tax forms, you fill out a list of broad expenditure areas allocating percentages to them as per your own priorities. It empowers the tax payer and gives good, immediate feedback to the government on popular priorities.

* Why only 50%? because while providing complete say in expenditure to the tax payer sounds good in principal, the average human is far too short-sighted to be able to do that effectively - eg, no-one wants to pay for 'welfare bludgers' until suddenly they find themselves sick or jobless.

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Re: Hypocrit

Same here. To find that I pay more tax each year than major companies do is just amazing. Also, giving away 99% of your fortune when you are that rich will not make him poor. It is a great gesture but not quite as amazing as the headlines seem.

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Re: Hypocrit

so to be good you have to be poor? 45b not good enuf for you?

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well

All children, by age 13 or so, are embarrassed by their parents. Unless Max is home-schooled, it is a fair bet that the mean girls at her school (and maybe much of the rest of the student body) will be able to recite much of the letter from memory, and will take every opportunity to do so. But embarrassments happen to children without that comforting pile of wealth behind them.

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Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

> But there’s also 1.6 billion people on the planet who don’t have access to electricity,

Quite the cheapest of cheap shot articles I've ever seen in The Register.

Zuckerberg, however much you love/envy/loathe him, did not make his money by taking it away from those without electricity.* The reasons why there are 1.6bn in the world without access to electricity are many and complex, but if they were ranked in order, Facebook or Zuckerberg would not feature in the top thousand.

* Yes, yes, I know: FB users have no electricity flowing across their synapses.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

I have electricity and I could use it to access Facebook, Twitter et al but I dont.

He can do what he likes with his money and I can feel happy that I have contributed a big fat ZERO to his fortune.

so go to him for choosing to do philathropic things with it but the past history of US Philanthopists is hardly rosy.

Many have used their gifts in order to get more buziness for their company. Seems to get rouns US anti-bribery laws ok.

So let him do his good works. The rest of us are free to use or not use the products and services his company is flogging.

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Re: Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

I don't even know how this can be downvoted.

Facebook is irrelevant. It's not even bullt on real money. Or wealth for that matter.

The one to petition would be Big Zaibatsu.

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Re: Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

Perhaps not so much of a cheap shot as a reminder of priorities? Maslow and all that.

It's all well and good to want everyone to have Facebook available to them, but I think Mr. Gates is on the right track when he wants to improve living conditions and provide quality health care to those who don't have it.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

Many have used their gifts in order to get more buziness for their company.

See also... Eugenics, which the Nazi's learned from the US.

Seriously, not a good country.

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Re: Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

Gates does one thing, Zuck can't do the same thing, he just can't as much as he thinks it's the greatest idea, egos would collide, that's not good for business. Spouting a personal philosophy that makes your company do more business, that's good business, no?

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Cheap shot, Mr. Orlowski

It's all well and good to want everyone to have Facebook available to them, but I think Mr. Gates is on the right track ...

Is there anyone who's made their money in a positive fashion that we can use as an example? Gates and F*ckerberg aren't it.

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I am quite disturbed that...

Max, presumably Maxine, chose to share her thoughts with Andrew Orlowski. Still, having read 'her' words it seems that even with one day under her belt she has turned out to be a remarkably well balanced and intentioned child despite... circumstances. I wish her well.

One thing I will not be doing is reading what her Father wrote. I am so not tempted it does not even require willpower or any other action to avoid that one.

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Anonymous Coward

what do you mean "the letter that your PR and public policy team wrote"?!

I wrot it, like, with my own keyboard, like, you litle, ungreatful...

I'll make you suffer, I'll make all the facebook account holders follow you, FOREVER!!!!!!

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Cynical, moi?

So, he is giving 99% of his FB shares, reportedly worth us$30bn to charity. That means he still has approximately us$300m of FB stock plus whatever cash and other assets he has elsewhere. I think they'll be okay.

Oh, and what charity has he given it to, ah, the foundation he and his wife have set up and, presumably therefore, direct, thus still retaining financial control of the advertising megalith.

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Anonymous Coward

Re: Cynical, moi?

Sounds remarkably like the Gates approach doesn't it?

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Pint

It's called Facebook.

Brilliant!

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Holmes

Lay down the big words like "zero-sum game" you don't understand, girl!

And not just Facebook, it’s the way Silicon Valley companies like yours pile up huge wealth by destroying value in every other part of the economy, as if technological progress were a zero sum game. It’s the way you strip-mine individuals so they have no ability to be autonomous economic agents, owning and trading the stuff we make, so all we have to live on is some feudal digital plantation

Someone took his Marxist Socialist Classes pretty early.

How about a visit at the Mises Institute next time?

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So is that brat going to like being plastered all over Facebook (without consent) from now on so that when she's old enough to be bullied, she'll need all of daddy's money just for the analysts help to find out what deep rooted problems she might have had when she was growing up.

Best get myself to uni to get a psycho degree because I see easy money in the future :-)

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Well, well Andrew. It has been a while since I could simply give one of your articles........

.......a thumbs up without having to qualify it. The world that the "slurpers" are creating is horrifying.*

*Just so the anti-Redmond hatebois understand this, that term does not just apply to Win 10 however much you may pretend that is the case.

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Max's daddy hates me

I posted a link to this article on Koobface and it was deleted. I am very sad now.

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Re: Max's daddy hates me

Update:

The user deleted their post after they had "changed" their opinion. Koobface did not delete my comment but rather the post where said user was mocking the Borg. I messaged the user asking him if my link offended him or got him in trouble with Koobface. He said it was 100% on him. I try to be fair so everyone doesn't think I hate Koobface. I do hate it, but that doesn't mean you can't have fun!

I do know people have been warned before so I hope this isn't the case. I am disappointed in my friend for taking down his own comment, if I say something and I am wrong I do not delete it. I admit I was wrong, like I was here for thinking Koobers deleting my reg link.

Very sad though if they re bullying people for better press and/or suppressing information.

More to come at 11!

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Anonymous Coward

What type of Shares

I bet they're converted to some non voting class. As it stands there are 2 classes of common and 5 classes of preferred stock. One class gets dividends of 1600 times that of common A & B stock, I wonder which class the remaining 1% will be...

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I wish

I wish that, instead of learning Chinese or reading a book, he makes his next project bulking up. I find his weedy geek body so offensive to the eye. Perhaps he could use his remaining one per cent of wealth to hire a personal trainer. Jock-Zuck would be much more loved in the world. Jeez, as it is he can't give away 30 billion without people taking the piss.

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Back in 2007

In 2007, if I promised to eventually donate 99% of the market value of Myspace it would sound like a pretty good deal right?

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I'm officially changing my name to "charity". Lower-case "c", so there's no confusion.

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Sucker-child

I'm glad there's a little Zuckerbaby. I say they should connect that child to all of the social media platforms, left at DEFAULT settings. Then let's see how Mark feels about what his company does.

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Re: Sucker-child

His child will go to one of those expensive private schools in the area which do not have computers or anything like them in classrooms, along with most of the children of the other "social media" executives.

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