back to article Facebook goes down, people dial 911

Facebook's servers fell over today – with users on the US east coast, and in Europe, the Middle East and Africa, complaining of outages. Facebook outage map Oh noes! Circles mark areas of connectivity problems ... Click for bigger map. Source: IsItDownRightNow.com According to IsItDownRightNow.com, the downtime appears to …

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    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I dont believe anything facebook says

      And there ladies and Gentlemen, the perfect specimin of a Facebook user. Freshly crawled out from the primordial soup presumably only because the site that attracted someone like him (or made him like that) was down.

      How he ended up here is anyone's guess though.

  1. connermac725

    OMG

    the end is near lol

    Facebook what is that oh yea that thing people waste their lives on

    just for the opportunity to have FB sell all they know about them to advertisers

    they should have just called the NSA to find out why it was down

  2. Tel

    I discovered, upon finding Facebook down, that I had to FaceRealLife instead.

    The horrors that I saw! Hold me!

  3. DNTP Silver badge

    Well that explains why the company was so productive today.

  4. Zog_but_not_the_first Silver badge
    Trollface

    Damage limitation

    "Facebook goes down, people dial 911 "

    So, only Americans overreacting then.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Damage limitation

      Maybe, maybe not.

      Plenty of people NOT living in the US actually think that "911" is their local emergency number.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Damage limitation

        They also went to "high school", graduated from "college", think the UK has got a president called "Obama" (actually, perhaps they are closer to the truth than they ought to be) and imagine they live somewhere near or even in an American state such as California or Texas, wear idiot baseball caps and think the nth (5th? not sure) amendment and "right to bear arms" are British. Increasingly they confuse fictional USA with their local reality and geography, modifying speech and ideas to fit, from silliness such as *going to the bathroom" even in a restaurant or the woods to calling the English Channel, *the ocean". I notice that, in Register comments, and sometimes articles, people who purport to be technical (and so needing to be accurate and precise in their work) can not even manage English spelling and grammar.

        Bloody sad loss of their own culture and identity to a misunderstood, fictional version. The worst for this are our most prominent politicians who definitely confuse USA interests with our own and encourage a common enemy in the form of more able, neighbouring countries that still have some awareness of their own identity and culture.

        So, of course the loss of some asocial web site is an emergency. Actually, get the army on to it to hunt down the saboteurs of our way of life.

  5. Belardi

    Same idiots as

    These are the same idiots who NEED to have a label printed on their phone screen "Peel protective cover to see display" on new phones.

    1. Caesarius
      Pint

      Re: Same idiots as

      Unnecessary instructions have been noted before.

      "Hold stick near centre of its length. Moisten pointed end in mouth. Insert in tooth space, blunt end next to gum. Use gentle in-out motion."

      —The toothpick instructions that annoyed Wonko

      (from http://hitchhikers.wikia.com/wiki/Wonko_the_Sane)

  6. Scroticus Canis Silver badge
    Headmaster

    How come if the US East Coast servers were down ....

    ... it was Californians dialling 911? What's not right, the story or American geography? If the servers covered the whole of American postings does it then just indicate a special level of idiots (IQ < 20) in just one state?

  7. StimuliC

    Damn You! You really went and Done it!

    Yes you Facebook, you were supposed to stay down, offline, permanently gone! You were not supposed to come back and haunt the world with you perpetual spying and reaping of personal information. When I pulled the Fiber Lines from the router you were supposed to stay disconnected FOREVER!!!!! LOL

  8. ecofeco Silver badge

    My favorite 911 call

    My favorite 911 call is the man who insisted the police bring him more beer.

    Repeatedly.

    You can guess the ending.

  9. Ross K Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    Downtime?

    One assumes the CIA were installing a few patches?

  10. Toby 2

    3pm on a Friday? Don't think office productivity would actually have changed much ;)

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    We are seeing

    the fall of the republic

  12. Winkypop Silver badge
    Alien

    Apols to Roger Waters

    And when they found our shadows

    Groups 'round the social media sets

    They ran down every lead

    They repeated every test

    They checked out all the data in their lists

    And then the alien anthropologists

    Admitted they were still perplexed

    But on eliminating every other reason

    For our sad demise

    They logged the only explanation left

    This species has amused itself to death

    No tears to cry

    No feelings left

    This species has amused itself to death

    Amused itself to death

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I suppose it's not as bad as in the UK where we call up the Police because there isn't enough toppings on our ice cream.

    1. Trygve Henriksen

      What kind of topping?

    2. gotes

      Someone call the grammar police!

  14. Mr Michael Strelitz

    Its the FBI stupid

    Wrong number. They should have been calling the FBI for FaceBook Information

  15. j.p

    911

    australia implemented 911 to supplement our local emergency number (000) due to unfortunate US influence on our chitlins.

    1. ToddR

      Re: 911

      Solutions:

      1. Legalise Logan

      2. Close the US

  16. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

    Just remember...

    The average person on the street is an idiot. And by definition, half the population is stupider.

  17. Shaha Alam

    but wait...

    ok, so it's a stupid story.

    but if police forces are using facebook and other social networks as part of their service delivery (which they increasingly are), don't the public have a duty to call them if those services go down?

    it might not be an emergency, sure, but it's also a duty for the cops to know when their service (via fb, twitter, wot-not) will be back again. how else will people 'like' them for helping cats out of trees?

  18. OGShakes

    Facebook or Facepalm?

    Nope Napalm the people who call the law for this kind of stuff, its the only answer!

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