back to article Reg hack hacked off by iPhone 5 repair notice

Attention iPhone 5 owners: your Cupertinian earslab may be defective. "Apple has determined that the sleep/wake button mechanism on a small percentage of iPhone 5 models may stop working or work intermittently," a notice posted on Apple's support website informed us iPhone 5 owners on Friday. "iPhone 5 models manufactured …


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    1. 45RPM Silver badge

      Re: These buttons are infamour

      Of course, if there's an acknowledged fault with the device then it will be serviced, free of charge, even when it is many years out of warranty.

      Speaking personally, I've never known Apple to have a 'not bovvered' attitude. Service has always been excellent. Other companies who've given me superb service are Sharkoon (on my PC case), Asus, Volvo…

      Greater Anglia is the one company I can think of who give service that is fairly consistently bad - but I suspect that the staff are probably very demoralised, poor dears.

  1. Conor Turton

    Still not fixed it?

    This is an issue which has been on the go since the iPhone 4. Seriously its long past due that they got it sorted. When I took my son's iPhone 4S to the local Genius Bar, two other people waiting for their appointments were in for exactly the same issue.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not bovvered

    Only the users,

    keeps em paying for 'any old rope'.

  3. Andrew Davenport


    I am still waiting for them to fess up or for people to put pressure on them to recall and fix all the 4GS handsets with broken WiFi and BT courtesy of IOS 6.1.3 and later. Its either faulty hardware OR faulty software so FIX IT or replace the otherwise previously working handsets!

    Not to mention the fact that since the latest IOS7 update my Home button mostly refuses to work without a great deal of cussing, swearing and repeatedly pressing it!

    My next phone will NOT be an iPhone!!!

    1. donguevas

      Re: Pah

      There is no such thing as an Iphone 4GS. It is just the 4s.

      1. Stevie Silver badge

        Re: Pah

        There's no such thing as an Iphone either. It's an iPhone.

  4. Don Jefe

    Standards of Service

    I can't believe Apple would do this. Their phones cost nearly $600 each! You would think they'd be Johhny On the Spot with fixing a problem that someone wasn't experiencing. You'd think that Apple would have better warranty service than Maybach. The rear passenger side air conditioning controls fail and it takes them nearly nearly 48 hours to receive and install the replacement unit! I bet the Apple and Maybach Customer Service EVP's shared a dorm room at university!

    Probably right across the hall from the Director of Patient Care at Johns Hopkins that took nearly 36 hours to find the replacement parts and a surgeon qualified to swap out the pins in my aftermarket ankle assembly. That's just fucking crazy! It takes 36 hours to fix it and I couldn't even walk! It's a damn good thing my A/C didn't quit the same day my ankle locked up. I would have written an open letter to God through his proxy office in Rome.

    The unmitigated gall of those 'geniuses' at the bar. Not to be a dick, but you should have known something was wrong a) when you called a bar and anyone told you to make an appointment (those calls rarely end in phone servicing, unless you get your cocaine hidden inside false iPhones). And b) when you went the first time and there was no bourbon on the shelf. NEVER trust any thing that calls itself a bar but has no bourbon.

    Finally. Did you not try calling Apple? I've got a special number if I've got any Apple related problems. They fix me right up, right now, every time. I would have thought they would give you guys the special number as well. What's up with that?

    1. keithpeter

      Re: Standards of Service

      "NEVER trust any thing that calls itself a bar but has no bourbon."

      Don, I think you need professional help. Your hawaiian lawyer is obviously too busy ironing his shirts. Go easy on that ether.

      The Tramp: Too much ether

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

        Re: Standards of Service

        But what happens if you take your butler to the genius bar to serve you bburbon while you wait for the Apple Genius to perform his de rigeur backroom shuttle?

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Standards of Service

      "Probably right across the hall from the Director of Patient Care at Johns Hopkins that took nearly 36 hours to find the replacement parts and a surgeon qualified to swap out the pins in my aftermarket ankle assembly. That's just fucking crazy! It takes 36 hours to fix it and I couldn't even walk!"

      Outrageous. They could surely have gotten a surgeon not qualified in less than half the time.

      You probably do not even need a surgeon to diagnose "entitlement syndrome". These things happen. Chill out.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Standards of Service

      Don, surely in the time it took you to write that you could have fired up the old Bridgport, knocked out a few titanium pins and swapped them out yourself with the aid of a few paracetamol and some Jeyes fluid?

      And if you want the real deal on car servicing, you have to pay the extra $100000 to get the Maybach badge on your car replaced with a Bentley badge. Then you get the helicopter land on your lawn with the mechanics to fix the passenger A/C, and you probably get a free escort to entertain you while you wait.

      This constantly trying to do things on the cheap is obviously going to result in lousy customer service. Now take me, when I wanted a new mobile, did I buy Apple? No. Samsung? No. Vertu? No, not ostentatious enough. I just sold a few hedge funds and bought Vodafone. Go to the top, it's the only way.

      1. Don Jefe

        Re: Standards of Service

        I really did want to make the replacement ankle myself. It is titanium and all, that's sort of my thing making it is it well within my capabilities, but the hospital would have no parts of it (Ha!). I even had one of the guys do up a full production simulation model (I couldn't do that in the hospital and missing a pinky as well). Even offered to pay full price for the off the shelf assembly I wouldn't need and legal sent over the same liability waver we use with all our clients. The one that absolves them of any bad stuff if we make a mistake and somebody loses an ankle and pinky or something. Still nothing. Bastard killjoys. I just wanted to say I had made my own, superior, body parts. Could have been a whole new business opportunity as well.

        It was great when they were servicing their parts though. I pointed out why there's had failed and demonstrated with the prototype I made later how my design was immune to the compression forces that had seen their 'medical device' fail. Still, nope. Use the approved model or go to another country. Pantywaists. I even offered the surgeon a private job on my staff. He declined, and was a bit scared too. See 'pantywaist'.

        The rest is exaggerated fiction for comic relief. The 'special' Apple number is for the intern I've named Apple, Crab. She's kind of grumpy. I think it's because she insists on demonstrating how smart she is when guys are around and they don't like that. I tell her it's like dating a girl that's super muscular, not cool. She needs to act dumb, then topple the bastards with a stunning display of intelligence when the prey doesn't expect it. Otherwise she'll never get dates. And the A/C controls never failed in the Maybach. Are you kidding?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Standards of Service

          "The rear passenger side air conditioning controls fail and it takes them nearly nearly 48 hours to receive and install the replacement unit" (Don Jefe)

          "And the A/C controls never failed in the Maybach. Are you kidding? (Don Jefe)

          If you must troll, at least troll consistently.

          1. mrfill

            Re: Standards of Service

            oh, that's a troll is it? I just thought it was a dick head. Thanks for the clarification

  5. Lunatik

    The early bird...

    So glad I put mine in for FOC on the spot replacement for this issue, 2 weeks inside the 1 year warranty.

    Chap barely looked at it, seemed to have seen quite a few before and that was in October 2013.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    Small percentage = every one manufactured upto march 2013

  7. quoll

    Eligible may not mean affected?

    I'm not sure that webpage is checking that you're in the small % of affected users, just that you are eligible should you have the issue. Both my wife and my iPhone 5 are eligible for the program, one sourced via Telstra Business and the other through BigW dept store with a big gap in between (months).

    Or I might just be really unlucky....

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    FRS= Fone Replacement Specialist

    For an iPhone appointment, you are more likely to be assisted by an FRS (Family Room Specialist), a sort of Genius Lite. They can service iOS devices only and not Macs.

    There's a guide that tells the FRS if they can replace a phone in warranty or not depending on its condition.

    Liquid sensors used to be treated as definite proof of liquid damage, but this is no longer the case. All iPhones have internal sensors which, if triggered will place the phone out of warranty, but there are usually other signs of damage such as corroded dock pins or a mottled display.

    Check out for an idea of what they have to endure on a daily basis.

    Also check out

    before you take your phone to the store.

  9. Alan Denman

    Good job they do not make cars..............

    "death certificate required to be sent with repair claim"

  10. Sureo

    World + dog comes down hard on Toyota's recalls.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What century is this again?

    You have to manually copy the serial number from the phone to a website..

    Why is there no OS update alerter utility that can check the serial and tell you? - oh because they don't want to tell you.. they don't want to proactivly fix the issue they want to retroactivly fix it, only those that HAVE the problem and check the website will find out.. In other words Apple want you to HAVE this problem before apple will fix it! - and you call that great service?! - Enjoy your iphone failing experience.

  12. ukgnome Silver badge


    you didn't upgrade to a 5S - who feels stupid now? Maybe you would like to phone me and complain.....Best of luck waking your phone up loser

    *the one with the 5S in the pocket....

  13. Confuciousmobil

    I'm eligible.

    I'm eligible but will I take mine in? Heck no!

    I've had no problems and even if I did, it's not worth losing my JB for.

    1. Velv Silver badge

      Re: I'm eligible.

      It might be worth going through the paperwork to prove that you were eligible just in case it does break in the future.

  14. JayBizzle

    All I can say is....

    About bloody time!

    Piss takers wanted £129 to replace my phone when it was an obvious known fault. Now I need to haul my backside to the nearest Apple Store for it to be fixed (I need a temp phone). Thanks Apple, I wish you had got to this policy sooner, perhaps 2 months ago when I hauled my arse down there for this exact issue.

  15. handle

    Corporate Doublespeak

    Maybe it's just an Atlantic language barrier, but "The iPhone 5 serial number you entered is eligible for this program," rather than an admission that it's faulty, makes it sound as if you've just won the lottery!

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "was told the repair should take four to six days"

    I swear I read the quote above as: "it takes four to six days to chuck it into the bin and a new phone to come out from the Chinese production facility by boat to here".

  17. Velv Silver badge

    And what about all the 3GS phones that have the same problem?

    Everyone I know who still has their 3GS reports that the sleep/wake no longer works.


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