back to article Microsoft hires Pawn Stars to shaft Google

Microsoft has turned its guns on the Google Chromebook as the "Scroogled" campaign enters its nastiest phase yet. Redmond has hired the stars of a reality television show called Pawn Stars to help with its anti-Google Scroogled campaign. In an imitation of an episode of the show, a reality programme about the colourful …

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    1. big_D Silver badge

      Nothing, you can access Office 365 online components with Chrome. You just don't get all of the features, the speed or the reliability of having it installed locally - especially if you don't have constant internet access.

  1. Chad H.

    I'm really not impressed with this child like behaviour on MS's part. Whilst I agree with their gripes about google and the chrome book; this whole campaign seems very immature.

    1. Khaptain Silver badge

      Agreed, this is a very American publicity method; knock down your client's product rather than presenting your own. It always make me wonder what they are hiding….

    2. Tom 260

      It's been a bit odd in the UK watching the hotmail (sorry, outlook) adverts that big it up as being private vs gmail's web interface which has targeted ads... except I use the pop3 servers on both, so miss the ads. The hotmail one has crap spam filters too, doesn't block the spammers using hotmail or academic domains among others.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        POP3?

        Do you know there's a more modern, better protocol called IMAP4 which lets you to sync your mailbox across different devices easily also?

        1. jonathanb Silver badge

          Re: POP3?

          And some people may have missed the news. but you can use IMAP on hotmail now. It was introduced a couple of months ago.

          1. Roo

            Re: POP3?

            "And some people may have missed the news. but you can use IMAP on hotmail now. It was introduced a couple of months ago."

            I can't recommend Hotmail on the basis of POP3 or IMAP access over the long term. I found that Microsoft had a habit of breaking it for weeks and months at a time (no prior notice, explanations, apologies etc) - usually whenever they revamped their service (ie: at least once every 2 years). On the first occasion they dropped POP3 support they didn't bother telling anyone - when queried they said I'd have to pay for it on the basis that it wasn't an official feature. I paid, they dropped POP3 for a long time a few months later. Their customer support was non-existent and by that I really do mean literally no customer service at all.

            Maybe they have improved (they couldn't get any worse) now, but I don't think it's worth the trouble finding out.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        > except I use the pop3 servers on both, so miss the ads

        I thought the point they were making was not so much that you get ads but that your emails are being "read".

        Of course they were the first to eagerly sign up to PRISM so it's a bit of a mixed bag really.

      3. apjanes

        Ads

        "adverts that big it up as being private vs gmail's web interface which has targeted ads"

        Personally I pride myself in having a modicum of intelligence and free will preventing me from getting unwillingly swayed by adverts no matter how targeted. If, by some slim chance, an advert DOES present me with something I'm interested in buying, I'm more likely to THANK Google than curse them!

  2. Mystic Megabyte
    FAIL

    RT?

    That's a bit rich when all those Windows RT owners will be left up shit creek.

    http://www.theguardian.com/technology/2013/nov/26/microsoft-kill-windows-rt-larson-green

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: RT?

      "This Surface RT isn't a real laptop," one says. "It doesn't have Windows it has RT which uses a titled interface, it has a half assed Office that runs like a dog. Without Wi-Fi those pretty tiles don't do much at all unless you suffer from epilepsy and when you are online, Microsoft sends you to bing and outlook. That's how you get Microshafted"

      Joking aside though I think this is a pretty pathetic campaign. Chromebooks are aimed at people like my dear old ma who doesn't want to have to contend with AV scans / malware scans and installing Windows updates she just wants to be able to browse the web and use email and keep in touch with the grandkids.

      Yeah it's a brick without a broadband connection, but in the last two years I can safely say I've lost less time to broadband not working than I have to Windows updates and all that other rubbish. Windows is just too complex for the average punter that the chromebook is aimed at and while a dumbed down RT went some of the way to resolve this issue it appears that it is about to be taken out the back and shot.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: RT?

        "Yeah it's a brick without a broadband connection,"

        Why is it a brick without broadband? You can do most stuff offline that you can do with a normal laptop, it has local storage for media and lots of apps, your docs, emails etc are available offline.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: RT?

        "This Surface RT isn't a real laptop," one says. "It doesn't have Windows it has RT which uses a titled interface, it has a half assed Office that runs like a dog. Without Wi-Fi those pretty tiles don't do much at all unless you suffer from epilepsy and when you are online, Microsoft sends you to bing and outlook. That's how you get Microshafted"

        & you work in IT? Damn, your bosses must have been extremely desperate to employ you if this is the sort of drivel you come out with!

        Surface RT is NOT a laptop, but a TABLET first of all which you can attach a keyboard to, just like you can with several Android tablets & iPad's. If it doesn't have Windows what does it run as it was Windows when you look at the properties & system information. That's like saying that Windows XP or NT were not real Windows.... Half assed Office? Haven't found anything in the Office 2013 that is supplied with RT that is missing from what the vast majority of people use on the desktop versions. With or without WiFi, those "pretty tiles" don't do much anyway as most users will revert to Desktop mode where the tiles are irrelevant! Microsoft doesn't send you anywhere you don't want to go to as you do have a choice going through the desktop IE (yes that's the only drawback, you don't have much of a choice of browsers).

        I haven't found any need to run malware, AV or any other scans with RT nor pestered with windows updates (other than 8.1 update & the automatic Defender definitions update).

        May be it is worth opening your eyes to things other than Google, and not slate things until you have actually used them, FYI I use most of the Google products on my desktop machines, as well as using a Surface RT most of the time when I am on-site rather than lugging a much heavier laptop with a lot lower battery life, yet can still do everything I need to do.

        1. Jo 5

          Re: RT?

          MS zombie. Anyone evangelical about MS gets pity from me and most others here.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: RT?

          Surface RT is NOT a laptop, but a TABLET first of all which you can attach a keyboard to

          I know which is why I quite clearly said - "This Surface RT isn't a real laptop,"

          Do a google image search on surface RT. Sorry do a bing image search on Surface RT... With the Google one 95% of the results returned show it with a keyboard. It is a tablet masquerading as a laptop

        3. Richard Plinston

          Re: RT?

          > Surface RT is NOT a laptop,

          Absolutely, it is completely unusable on your lap. The floppy keyboard connection, the single poor screen angle (2! on Surface 2), the bad weight distribution (compared to a laptop), the distance from keyboard edge to rear stand forcing the keyboard too close. Swipe the screen wrong and it will go to the floor.

        4. Richard Plinston

          Re: RT?

          > That's like saying that Windows XP or NT were not real Windows.

          No. It's like saying Windows Phone isn't real Windows. It isn't if it doesn't run real Windows applications or real Windows games.

      3. Ian Ringrose

        Re: RT?

        I think for your mother’s use case, a basic tablet would be better than a pretend laptop.

        The Surface RT can be great if you need of-line access to Exchange email while on the train etc, as well as being able to work with MS-Office documents. However I tent to put in into the same camp as tablets and not think of it as a laptop.

  3. JDX Gold badge

    What next, Storage Hunters?

    A scene where they bid like crazy after seeing a pile of laptops in a unit, only for the winner to realise they are worthless ChromeBooks?

    1. Jess--

      Re: What next, Storage Hunters?

      A better option would be Windows RT Tablets

      1. DrStrangeLug

        Storage Hunter

        As in hunting for storage, and finding that you can't actually add a microSD to an apple device.

  4. frank ly

    The response (in my dreams)

    Just before Christmas, an advert appears on prime-time TV, peak viewing hours:

    An office desk, with a laptop on it, running Windows, Larry Page and Tim Cook walk on-scene from opposite sides and both look at the laptop. They look at each other and say, "Windows!". They both turn to the camera and say, "It's a pile of shit." (The end).

  5. mIRCat
    Windows

    Two birds; one stone!

    Marketing like this sums up why I don't use Microsoft products or regularly view 'reality' television in my personal life.

    Microsoft, behaving like we should forget you settled with the DOJ over your monopolistic business practices, and ended up with a slap on the wrist, just because it was over a decade ago comes off as hypocritical, self-serving, and disingenuous. Also hiring reality 'tv stars' to sling mud on your competitors and push your products reeks of pandering to the lowest common denominator. You could always look into hiring a new advertising company.

    That being said, I don't expect a tiger to change it's stripes.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: Two birds; one stone!

      Its 'scripted reality' television.

      Hopefully not using Visual Basic. Do they still have the patent on the "is not" pointer comparison operator btw?

  6. Aaron Browne
    FAIL

    Microsoft - Selling The Past

    This is Microsoft trying to sell the past. Pretty much everything I do nowadays requires the Internet. Feedly, productivity and Citrix connectivity to work. Unless they can offline the whole Internet onto a Windows 8 laptop then effectively it is the same as a Chromebook for me. Note: I own a Samsung Chromebook.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Chromebook apps do have offline mode...

    Chromebook app do have mode too. You can still write documents, play games etc. Just like any other laptop that doesn't have an internet connection.

    https://chrome.google.com/webstore/category/collection/offline_enabled

  8. WinHatter

    Reminds me of some other device ...

    XBOX ONE where you need a patch to play offline ... how long before that is scrapped altogether ???

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Reminds me of some other device ...

      "XBOX ONE where you need a patch to play offline ... how long before that is scrapped altogether ???"

      That's because they started making several million consoles before the OS went RTM. The PS4 is the same.

  9. Miek
    Coat

    ""This isn't a real laptop," one says. "It doesn't have Windows, it doesn't have Office. " - Sounds too good to be true!

  10. Jo 5

    Megapedant

    1. Tim Parker
      Joke

      "Megapedant"

      Mega-pedant.

  11. Jo 5

    Love seeing MS butthurt. Their useful days are numbered. Most non innovative fair or interesting company in a good few decades.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "Love seeing MS butthurt. "

      You mean the record profits / revenues they recently declared?

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Microsoft's burning platform?

    The one thing that always kept wallet firmly in pocket, with Surface (the none pro version), has been my doubts about Microsoft's commitment to the platform. Looks like I was right.

    Say what you want about Google turning your anonymised data into ads (not to mention giving your none anonymised data to the NSA), but at least Chrome OS seems to have a future.

  13. Frankee Llonnygog

    I understand Windows still has more market share than Chromebooks

    These ads make it look like Microsoft thinks Chromebooks are a threat. Is that really the impression they want to give?

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Hard-up Students..

    ...have bought a chromebook and saved $ in doing so but now have to pawn them.

    Just wondering what their level of debt would have been if they had bought a laptop AND MS Office.

    Sure they might have got a bit more for the laptop but aren't Microsoft's licenses non transferable?

    Legally, wouldn't an new owner have to cough for a new office license?

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    On a different tack ...

    Who's the actress ? She's well buff.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I've got this laptop.

    "Sorry its not a real laptop - its Windows Surface RT - it doesn't have any software, can't run a full office suite..."

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "When you're not connected, it's pretty much a brick."

    Microsoft is pushing Office365 and pushing for people to store their files in the cloud. If they do that, when you're not connected then you pretty much have a brick anyway. If you're not connected you can't get the myriad of patches from Microsoft either.

  18. Roo

    Microsoft, the 90s called, they want their FUD back.

    They are unable to compete technically.

    They are unable to compete financially.

    They are unable to sue the opposition to oblivion.

    They are unable to make the threat of removing their ad dollars stick.

    They are unable to buy Google...

    So they resort to their original Plan A, FUD.

    It would be nice if they gave competing technically a shot for a change, you know, something positive that has benefits for their end users instead of trying to eliminate the competition via propaganda. Not entirely convinced that people seeking short-term loans is a promising growth area for Microsoft though...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Microsoft, the 90s called, they want their FUD back.

      Strange that Microsoft are making so much money then....Record results last quarter.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Microsoft, the 90s called, they want their FUD back.

        Strange that Microsoft are making so much money then....Record results last quarter.

        Yep, they're going supernova. Right now their profits appear to shine really brightly, and they've expanded to a very large size.

        Soon as the core collapses though, you'll get one of two things: a white dwarf, or a black hole.

        IBM became a white dwarf.

        1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
          Facepalm

          Re: Microsoft, the 90s called, they want their FUD back.

          > Record results last quarter.

          Because they would permit results to not be totally stellar so shortly before Captain Ballmer's departure?

      2. Rumournz

        Re: Microsoft, the 90s called, they want their FUD back.

        the fact they jack up the ransom 10-30% err prices every year may have something to do with "record" results

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Running out of ammo

    I rather think that once you have begun reliance on knocking copy in a campaign, you're practically down to your last gun. It speaks of desperation to maintain that someone else's box is not that good, when your own sales are going down the drain.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Running out of ammo

      Indeed, because this strategy worked so well for the Labor party here in Australia, I guess Microsoft thinks it could work just as well for them.

      I live in hope! Seeing another OS dominant will be a refreshing change.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is it because everyone knows how honest the owners of pawn shops are?

  21. Mike Flugennock
    Facepalm

    What's the goddamn' deal with Microsoft's marketing zombies?

    Are they really entirely incapable of learning from mistakes at all?

    First the singing, dancing, clapping chorus lines at Microsoft shops at the shopping malls, then the Microsoft Morris Dancers, now this. What is the goddamn' deal with Microsoft's marketing types? I mean, it's not like anybody's putting a gun to their heads to get them to sign off on stuff like this. They come up with some crass, oily excuse for a marketing campaign, are laughed out of the place, and then they're back again later with something even more crass and oily?

    Do they really have the memories of houseflies? Do they really think coming back with the same crassness and oiliness will produce different results? Are they consciously, proudly, gleefully stupid? What's the goddamn' deal?

    1. Fihart

      Re: What's the goddamn' deal with Microsoft's marketing zombies?

      A lot of hard work to make a non-point about a competitor.

      My guess is there's a lot of people who had never heard of a Chromebook who now have now. They may or may not remember Microsoft's negative message.

      One thing is certain, Microsoft are spending money like water on a campaign which gives Google the oxygen of publicity and does little or nothing for Microsoft products.

    2. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: What's the goddamn' deal with Microsoft's marketing zombies?

      back again later with something even more crass and oily

      "Fracking" marketing. Literally!

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