back to article Graphene QUILT: A good trampoline for elephants in stiletto heels

Fears that the radical wonder material graphene might not actually be strong enough for elephants to stand supported in mid-air on a thin film of it, on one leg, while wearing stiletto heels, have been disproven. And the material - set to revolutionise just about everything, as soon as people can figure out ways to start using …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ah yes, since I've been forward in time with the photons.

    from the "al wailing Wall Street Journal, 2059."

    "Graphene wonder material companies in court, again facing a class action lawsuit, as it transpired the executives knew for 20 years, microparticles of dust from it, causes Mesiothelioma, and were continuing to make it for a vast profit, (peace be unto it.)"

    Obviously there's no evidence for this, but if history has shown anything, it's that microparticles, such as asbestos, MDF etc, cause problems with breathing.

    1. Don Jefe

      Re: Ah yes, since I've been forward in time with the photons.

      Like particles from fiberglass, gypsum (drywall), asbestos, MDF, etc... are all hazardous but are perfectly safe if not broken or disturbed. It's like anything else, the end application will determine any materials suitability for a given role.

      Asbestos was/is a perfectly safe substance for many applications and but not so much for flooring tiles (material is damaged from foot traffic) or for buildings with sealed climates where the particles are blown about repeatedly through the building. It is still the best performing economically sound insulator for pipes but everyone is scared of it.

      1. The Indomitable Gall

        Re: Ah yes, since I've been forward in time with the photons.

        Asbestos was also the heat-shield material of choice for the US spaceshuttles, which is probably why souvenir hunters were warned off scavenging the wreckage of the Columbia.

        "The right application" still has to account for the consequences of catastrophic failure.

        If an asbestos-insulated pipe freezes, what happens to the asbestos? Even if the actual breakage does raise any dust, replacing the pipe becomes a much more delicate (read "expensive") process.

        1. Don Jefe

          Re: Ah yes, since I've been forward in time with the photons.

          The asbestos insulation on pipes was just a slip on cover with a paper wrapper, like foam insulation today (less the paper wrapper), not part of the pipe itself. In the event of a pipe failure the water kept the insulation wet, and safe. It was a nice built in safety feature that I'm sure was unintentional.

          You're correct about the costs of servicing the pipes. Because asbestos dries out and becomes very brittle removing the insulation requires some care but it really isn't a HAZMAT situation. They'll tell you it is so they can charge more but soaking the stuff before removal and dropping it onto wet canvas is a very safe way to remove it.

  2. WereWoof
    Alien

    bouncing giant pachyderms?

    I am trying, and failing miserably to envisage bouncing giant pachyderms in stilettos on trampolines. It may help if I knew whether or not they were also wearing a tutu?

  3. HMB

    Carbon Fibre Out....

    ....Graphene mesh in.

    Some day in the future...

  4. Allan George Dyer
    Coat

    So...

    can I have my space elevator now?

  5. mIRCat
    Alien

    I do believe...

    "Graphene QUILT: A good trampoline for elephants in stiletto heels."

    SyFy Channel may have found the plot for their next 'SyFy Original' movie, Stilettophants: Trampolines of Doom.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Paper cut

    What would happen if you ran your finger along the side of this moelcule thick material?

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