back to article Android FOUND ON TABLETS inscribed with WORD OF GOD

A church has handed out tablets instead of hymn books - but not stone ones etched with the 10 commandments: these are Android fondleslabs whose pinch-to-zoom feature is a godsend for elderly parishioners, we're told. The first tab-equipped Church of England congregation at St John's Church in Mickleover, near Derby, clutched …

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  1. southpacificpom
    Windows

    WTF - No iPads?

    Looks like Steve Jobs has failed to sell God his Apples but, then again God has had a thing against apples since Adam & Eve.

  2. TheOtherHobbes

    Do androids

    dream of electric sheep?

    1. Rukario
      Terminator

      Re: Do androids dream of electric sheep?

      Yes they do, at least if they're paranoid:

      Now I lay me down to sleep

      Try to count electric sheep

      Sweet dream wishes you can keep

      How I hate the night.

      - Marvin the Paranoid Android

  3. Vladimir Plouzhnikov

    Pinch to zoom

    I know that one, my wife's got it - if I pinch her, she'd zoom!

  4. adnim

    No point

    in trying to have a rational conversation with those incapable of rationalisation.

    I think this Android hymnbook approach is a waste of money. Money the could be better spent in the community or maintaining the church building. Books do come in large print for the visually impaired.

    Not that I condone the teaching of fairytale as fact. However, people have a right to believe what they wish and not be persecuted for those beliefs.

    For those in search of knowledge and understanding what knowledge is, David Deutsch has written a rather good book called the "The Beginning of Infinity".

    In this book there is a chapter called "A dream of Socrates" where Socrates has a chat with whom he presumes to be Apollo, yet later in the conversation is convinced or persuaded that he is talking to Hermes.

    This gives a pretty good insight as how we as humans attain knowledge and discover truths.

    Having an open mind swings both ways. I don't do gods any of them, it doesn't mean one does not exist. However, a benevolent god would not punish those who questions its existence nor would it seek submission. I am of the opinion that all the many hundreds of gods we know of are a product of the imaginings of man. Should a god really exist I am quite sure it would be falling over itself laughing at us.

    1. Afflicted.John
      Stop

      Re: No point

      If they want to broaden their appeal why is it a waste of money? You are forgetting that the Archos tablets used here are hardly the most expensive thing in the world, marginally more expensive than Kindle's. The issue with Kindle's is they are tied too heavily to the amazon ecosystem and not "agnostic" enough (right phrase?).

      Now on the other hand if you had a Church wanting up their levels of customer satisfaction and deployed iPad minis, I would suggest that is a Church that no longer requires donations. Call the Archos a poor man's iPad and it still does the job and is more flexible that a large print book which requires duplication in small print and still only gives you two print size options.

      It's a good idea.

  5. taxman

    Mugs in the pew?!

    As title

  6. Justice
    Trollface

    Atheist. So technically incorrect.

    This is a copy and paste, because I have popcorn in the microwave...

    --- snip ---

    It is time for us to recognize as a society that there is no such thing as an atheist. Let me help you understand why this is the case.

    Do you believe in Leprechauns? Probably not, because Leprechauns are imaginary. Yes, there are lots of books, movies and fairy tales dealing with Leprechauns. People talk about Leprechauns all the time. Leprechauns even have a popular brand of breakfast cereal. But that does not mean that Leprechauns exist.

    We know that Leprechauns are imaginary. Why? Because there is no evidence for their existence. Despite all the publicity Leprechauns get, normal people dismiss storybook creatures like Leprechauns as myths, and rightly so.

    If you do not believe in Leprechauns, what are you? Are you an aleprechaunist? Of course not. You are normal. People who do not believe in Leprechauns are completely normal.

    http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/no-atheists.htm

    --- snip ---

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    WIKI-fying the Bible?

    Can you imagine if somebody were to link the hymns and such to a WIKI?

    "The Lord is my Shepard [citation needed]

    I Shall Not Want [NPOV_VIO]"

  8. Local G
    Angel

    The Atheist Agnostic Alliance

    is looking for a suitable Divinity. Must have experience creating ex nihilo and ad lib miracle making. Appearance is important. There is a mandatory drug test.

    If you pass these tests, any requests of our search committee, and otherwise prove to us that you are the Deity, we shall proclaim you to be GOD ALMIGHTY. All the atheists and agnostics in our organization will worship you. And we shall teach your ways diligently to our children, and we shall speak of them when we sit at home, and when we walk along the way, and when we lie down and when we rise up.

    And we shall bind them as a sign on our hand, and they shall be for frontlets between our eyes. And shall write them on the doorposts of our house and on our gates.

    For your part, you shall reward us when we are good and forgive us when we are bad.

    We reserve the right to abrogate this contract at any time and without notification.

  9. ja
    Linux

    Technology and fathe

    I don't understand all the references to Newtonian this and that. Just need an answer to a single question:

    How do you get WIFI and browser support for the Apple NEWTON ?

    http://www.theregister.co.uk/Design/graphics/icons/comment/linux_32.png

    1. Bill Ray (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Technology and fathe

      Just place your faith in the Internet, and it will provide.

      Newton wi-fi drivers...

      http://www.deleet.de/ray/newton/802.11b-FAQ.html

      Newton web browser...

      http://www.unna.org/unna/internet/web-browsers/NetHopper3.2/

      Who needs an iPhone?

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