back to article Steve Jobs uncloaks the 'iPad'

Steve Jobs has announced Apple's long-awaited tablet - now officially named the iPad, as The Reg had predicted - at a media circus Wednesday morning in the 757-seat Novellus Theater at San Francisco's Yerba Buena Center for the Arts. The Reg will offer its considered analysis of what Jobs called "a truly magical and …

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  1. mrlumpy
    FAIL

    Wat???

    Seriously, what a waste of time, it is a high powered netbook sized iphone, hardly a revolution.

    How long after this goes to market will the forums be full of "my screen cracked" topics?

  2. david willis
    FAIL

    10inch i-phone

    Hmm, a 10 inch iphone... doesn't fit in your pocket. Isn't a proper computer. Hmm, lemon maybe?

    That should start a fight with the fan boys.

  3. B Ward

    Hmmm

    Er it looks a bit bulky! Not so cracked on touch control for gaming either. Crap just saw the price. Okay that's me not sold on it.

  4. strangefish

    no mention

    of a price point for this gi-phone then?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      I got used to it..

      'Though it'd take bloody big strides to get a whole ten incher in and not be uncomfortable.'

      Mine feel fine but thanks for the concern mate.

      Paris, a little uncomfortable about a ten incher but she got used to it too..

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Paris Hilton

        Poor boy.

        Too much food microwaved in plastic containers as a child?

        Paris, because she a mistress of tweezers and a magnifying glass.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Jobs Horns

    Finally

    Can we all just move on now please?

    It's a giant iphone - whoop-de-doo

    and this is 'a truly magical and revolutionary product' how exactly? Surely with something of that size it wouldn't be too hard to have it run a full version of OSX so you can make it somewhat usable beyond what his Jobsness decrees you are allowed to have?

  6. Jay Jaffa
    Jobs Horns

    Her indoors wants one

    I think it's the acid test - this will be a success.

    I bought her a Windows 7 ACER PC last month from PC World. Came so full of 60-day trial rubbish from Norton, Kodak and the likes that the performance was crap and there was relentless pop-ups so she actually gave up on it. I ended up re-formatting and sticking Ubuntu on it. She's hasn't noticed the difference but thinks it's a lot quicker now.

    She's just seen this iPad preview now and said that she wants rid of the laptop (ebay maybe hon, someone might want it!). A consumer PC for the masses.

    9 years of Visual C++ and now it's time to learn how to code for the apple. How did Microsoft fuck things up so much ... !

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The only real surprise is the price

    Everything else had been widely predicted, but the $499 base price is impressive.

    It's also interesting that it's not available today - it won't be available for another 2 months.

    Who'll be the first to market an iPad handbag?

  8. Benjamin Ford
    Stop

    Not unless it has flash

    Type your comment here — plain text only, no HTML

    I won't even consider it if it doesn't have it.

  9. Petrea Mitchell
    WTF?

    Giant iPhone == possible problems

    I'm looking at early photos of Steve Jobs holding the iPad delicately by its edges and thinking: If you're supposed to carry this around the house, *how*?? The Kindle and friends may look ugly to Apple designers, but at least they have obvious places you can grab on to them. If this is supposed to replace the newspaper, how's it going to handle getting cereal and orange juice spilled on it at the breakfast table? Or being shoved into a briefcase, since you can't fold it up to protect the screen? If your kids are supposed to use this, how many times will it survive being dropped on the floor?

  10. Youngone Silver badge
    FAIL

    Well...

    On the face of it, this might be quite a good idea.... but.

    How much will it cost? It'd have to be cheap for me to even look at it.

    How locked down will it be? Very I suspect. After all its an Apple.

    Will ebooks be encumbered with DRM? Of course, God forbid I might like to have control over my own purchases.

    Don't imagine I'll be buying one of these. The price rumours are between US$500 and US$1,000. That equates to NZ$700 to NZ$1,400 or so. That would make it between 2x and 4x more than I'll pay.

  11. strangefish
    Unhappy

    ahh there it is

    Bah and bah again. The low-end price is eyecatching but Apple really have to knock it off with the Ryanair way they charge for "extras" on their products like a useful amount of memory, storage or best of all... a connection that allows you to actually use the damn thing. Thrice I bah at thee.

  12. Benjamin Ford
    FAIL

    And only 64 Gb?

    That seems a little low, I would have thought that would have been the entry level!

  13. Mr Young
    Pint

    Cool!

    "gesture-based interface elements" Cooooool.....Does that mean I can give my computerspaz the finger and it'll minimise the currently focused window. Does it work like that?

  14. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Hmm lets see.

    No camera, thats for version 2, then video camera and wide screen for version 3!

    No flash? check

    No multitasking? check

    Tied in to the app store? check, watch out macbook owners, you are next!

    will i probably buy one anyways? check

  15. Steen Hive
    Thumb Up

    "Run iPhone software virtually unmodified"

    So you have to jailbreak it, then? :-)

  16. Eddy Ito Silver badge

    WFIW

    web page here

    http://www.apple.com/ipad/

  17. Vince

    Wake me up when it is over

    God that's a dull product. The Duplo version of the iPhone with added "not really needed" factor.

    Still, hopefully it won't take off so I don't have to put up with plenty of tards telling me my preferred choice of device (which won't be an ipad funnily enough) should be replaced with one.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Oh goody.

    OMGOMGOMG.. Oh wait, umm, it looks just like a big iPhone...

    Can't wait for all the Dom Joly jokes.

    HELLO, YES, I'M A POSING TWAT WITH TOO MUCH MONEY.

    YES, IT'S A GLORIFIED EBOOK READER.

    All that hype for so little substance.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      WTF?

      Low end price? FFS, you are a banker and I claim my five pounds.

    2. Bit Brain

      Not available for 2 months…

      I know that's usually the case with most new Apple hardware but I wonder if it's deliberate in this case. Gives iPhone devs a chance to d/l the SDK and make sure their existing apps work OK on the new shiny and possibly (depending on how easy they make it) update them to use the extra screen real-estate so that there are at least a few iPad apps available when people finally get them.

    3. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD
      Jobs Horns

      I feel your pain

      Goddamit, looks like I'll have to go learn obj-c or something :(

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        I feel your pain.

        I'm an Apple fan but... Objective-C... <blurgh>... bigger hack than C++ and that's saying something.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Go

      Not available for 2 months

      This is deliberate. To be able to sell it immediately the thing has to be FCC certified. To get it FCC certified you have to send final products in to be tested. And because the FCC can't control their staff, leaked product shots would be all over the Internet immediately.

      The free publicity from the secrecy-hype and the unveiling is worth far more than any lost sales between now and its availability.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        3G Only surely?

        FCC approval is only required for 3G not WiFi and 3G versions wont be available for another month anyway (so 3 months wait in total).

        Can't see much reason why the WiFi-only versions couldn't have been available now.

    5. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Personally...

      ...I'm glad it doesn't have Flash.All the current implementations have security flaws, gobble up cpu cycles (bye bye battery life) and Flash just isn't required to view video over the web.

      And Flash based web sites? Immediately marks the company (and designer) as decidely 3rd rate. If their judgement is so awful that they think a Flash web site is "cool" then I sure as hell ain't trusting them with my business.

    6. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Read what you just posted

      You admit that you bought a PC full of 3rd party crap and somehow this is Microsofts fault? Blame Acer for bundling all the unnecessary bloat.

      Did you even try a clean install of Windows 7? You would be surprised at just how well it runs.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Very disappointing

    The price is great, it's fantastic engineering... but what would I want one for?

    And the kids will soon break it.

  20. Tom Maddox Silver badge
    Coat

    At 9.7 inches . . .

    . . . the iPad is good for those heavy flow days! Mine's the one with the string attached (yes, strings are on tampons, I know).

    1. John 104
      FAIL

      Price?

      The price blows. Seriously. Why limit yourself to such a small cross section of functionality on an akward device when you could just buy a netbook or a really nice laptop? Apple are going to land on their face with this one.

      Fail. Because FAIL!

  21. ratfox Silver badge
    Paris Hilton

    First to post a comment...

    Yeah right.

    They already have a commercial on YouTube:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1BUH9eXy18

    1. ratfox Silver badge
      FAIL

      Oops

      This video has been removed due to terms of use violation.

      They sure didn't waste a minute...

    2. D@v3
      Jobs Horns

      you tube vid

      removed due to terms of use violation.

      my 2p, looks like a solution to a problem i didnt know existed. Like my other iProds, this looks blaaahmeh

      (typed on my pocket sized EeePc)

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Better than a netbook?

    So, this is a device to compete with the netbook that will have none of the flexibility of the netbook (essentially the ability to run any desktop software you want, barring games)? Count me out. A restricted app store requiring a blessing from apple for each and every update is bad enough on the iphone.

  23. Martin an gof Silver badge

    How many bedrooms?

    Does the 32G version have one bedroom and the 64G two?

    http://www.yournewhome.co.uk/Barratt-iPad-homes_2

    http://www.barratthomes.co.uk/About-Us/Testimonials/Joanne-Milne/

    M.

  24. Paul 4
    Joke

    World continues to revolve around sun

    But every fanboy knows where the sun shines from.

  25. O
    FAIL

    Awful.

    Judging by the posts on Engadget and Gizmodo (the favourite hang outs for Jobsian disciples), even the iSheep are baulking at this.

    Expensive.

    No multi-tasking (seriously?!?!?!?).

    No support for Flash. At all.

    No camera.

    Ordinary battery life.

    PA developed ARM SoC which looks like it'll end up slower than TI, Qualcomm, Samsung and particularly Marvell chips.

    Why on earth would anyone want an enormous, heavy and expensive iPhone?

    If you want a limited tablet without a fully-fledged O/S, Chrome O/S tablets will be far more capable, open, less bloated and cheaper.

  26. PaulW

    Why?

    So is it:

    a) An IPhone with no phone or

    b) A laptop with no keyboard or

    c) A table with no handwriting capability (at least as far as I can see)

    I suppose the 10 hour battery is interesting but my portable DVD player does 14 hours.

    iPhone application scaling strikes me as a disasater - its got to have some hardware scaling mechanism or quite frankley an app or game is going to look really blocky at that resolution. Facebook on that screen really should have been the web style version not the iPhone incarnation.

    I guess I just dont get it. I have an iPhone for use as a mobile device (phone/PDA/games/web) and a small laptop for use as a moble computing platform (work/remote network access/games/web). Between the two of them I can talk, play physical shiney media, write hand written notes (never underestimate this!), and a few other things that the iPad can't do.

    Remind me of why I need one other than St. Steve says I need one?

  27. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    It says a lot

    when iTampon is trending on Twitter but iPad isn't. Heck, even Kindle is trending. Something tells me this is a FAIL already.

  28. Michael Downie
    FAIL

    Massively Disappointing

    I was hoping for it to have a version of OSX on it, rather than a scaled up iPhone/iTouch OS.

    If it had a version of OSX, had multitasking and could run most OSX software like iLife, then i would say its a nigh on essential and properly groundbreaking product.

    But it doesnt have any of it, it isnt essential and bearing in mind the iPhone/iTouch has been out since 2007 with essentially the same features, its not even groubreaking. When realeased in the UK, the 3G model needs to be sub-£300 for me to even glimmer some interest.

    Sorry Mr Jobs, i like your phones, laptops and desktops but your iPad... try again please.

  29. Paul Owen 1
    WTF?

    Meh, Meh, and thrice Meh

    Big iPhone, no multitasking, no Flash support, backlit screen for reading ebooks (have Apple not heard how horrible an experience that is?), no proper OS.

    I say once more: Meh!

  30. John Sanders
    Flame

    LOL!

    "Pricing begins at $499 - that'll get you a non-3G iPad with 16GB of storage"

    Muah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha (rolling on the floor)

    $500 for that piece of... so I can enjoy the pleasure to buy crap from virtual apple sponsored stores???? not even multitasking... !!!!!

    Come on do not make me laugh.

    Oh wait this was about saving the printed press...

    Muah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha (rolling on the floor)

    Who's going to be the idiot buying one???? $500!!!!

  31. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    Hmmmm

    When everyone is wanting everything smaller, apple give us an oversized iPod Touch!

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Coffee/keyboard

    seriously?

    First female comment I heard: Does it have wings?

  33. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    Ho hum

    iCouldntGiveaFlyingFuck

  34. bluest.one
    FAIL

    Rename it the iFail All Ready

    No multitasking.

    So I wouldn't be able to listen to Spotify while I browse the internet, or to my locally streamed audio while doing something else, like writing my emails.

    Uh-oh.

    And locked down tight so I'm limited to using what the crack-addled monkeys at App Store approval department say is blessed.

    Apple have a track record of scre-ups for all their insightful wins and this is such a fail.

  35. Slappy
    FAIL

    Meh...

    I'll wait till Asus/Acer et al bring out a superior machine for half the price <ducks for coat>

  36. PaulW

    Mono speaker(s)?

    Just noticed from the 360 view on the apple site that it only looks like it has one speaker (bottom left corner - positioned the same place as an iPhone). Can anyone confirm/deny?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Thanks

      As with everything they seem to release, the first thing to look for is what blindingly obvious thing which most manufacturers don't bother putting on the specs, have been left off the device instead.

      Like does it do Copy and Paste?

      People will still buy it - maybe it'll put off the hardened fanbois, but there's still enough people who will buy it simply because it's there and the BBC have told them to.

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