back to article Townsfolk left deeply unsatisfied by Bury St Edmunds' 'twig' of a Christmas tree

Yeah, yeah, "It's November, I don't want to hear the C word until the 24th of December" and so on – tell that to the denizens of Bury St Edmunds in Suffolk, England, who have been left feeling cold after the arguably premature erection of the town's Christmas tree. The yule totem was stood to attention this week by community …

  1. Khaptain Silver badge

    A decent star can add a good six inches

    And create a whole load of other problems.......ouch

  2. The Dogs Meevonks

    Re: A decent star can add a good six inches

    I read 'A star can add a good six inches' and my first thought was .. Yeah and some trollop will try and make some money selling that story to the tabloids.

    Then I realised... oh.. not that kind of 'star' :)

  3. pig

    Meh.

    Imagine the comments if they had a 50ft tree covered with loads of decorations.

    It would be all "Why are you spending on a tree instead of children's / adult / other council services"

    Council's can't win. Damned it they do, damned if they don't in this world where everyone is a critic and we seem to compete with each other over who can spot any semblance of fault first.

  4. Captain Scarlet Silver badge

    I thought the whole point was to promote your town as the place to go for Christmas Shopping and the Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

  5. hplasm Silver badge
    Pint

    Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

    Tennants Xmas retail experience?

    36 pack with holly on top!

  6. Spazturtle Silver badge

    This tree was donated so the council didn't even pay for it.

  7. defiler Silver badge

    Re: Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

    Tennants Xmas retail experience?

    That's Tennents. It's also from Glasgow, so I'm duty-bound to hate it in lieu of Deuchars, which they at least still brew in Edinburgh (although I believe most is from Tadcaster these days).

  8. The Dogs Meevonks

    Re: Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

    I've always found it amusing that Tenants lager' seems to be one of the favourite tipples of the homeless. :)'

  9. katrinab Silver badge

    In my town centre, it is the Business Improvement District that pays for the tree, and that is funded by the shop keepers as an additional precept on their council tax, and it is an entirely separate budget to other council services.

  10. katrinab Silver badge

    Re: Christmas Experience for their retail tenants?

    In England it is White Lightning cider, in Scotland, I thought it was Buckfast?

  11. Wilseus

    Agree, but minus one point for "council's"

  12. Public Citizen
    Go

    The careful reader will note that it is TWO trees that have been donated.

  13. GruntyMcPugh Silver badge

    @Captain Scarlet: "promote your town as the place to go for Christmas Shopping"

    Not being gouged for parking would give a town a higher ranking for me, over the size of their Xmas tree.

  14. Giovani Tapini

    In full respect to the article wording...

    While the town "pines" for a more respectably sized tree, this story resin-ated with me as other towns have gone through this in recent years. I find that in some cases the people have actually got a point, so its no wonder they start needling the council.

    The problem is that if there is too much girth you cant fit it into the hole. If there is too much length it starts getting wobbly and cannot maintain its erection. My wife tells me that tinsel is too scratchy and irritating leaving me with just the balls for decoration.

  15. Rupert Fiennes

    Re: In full respect to the article wording...

    Very good Giovani :-)

  16. Efer Brick

    Re: In full respect to the article wording...

    Barking mad!

  17. Daedalus Silver badge

    Re: In full respect to the article wording...

    You are Alistair Dabbs and I claim my 5 quid.

    (Make it 50 will you. Inflation and all that sort of thing)

  18. Giovani Tapini

    Re: In full respect to the article wording...

    I am not Alistair Dabbs. I am still working out if I should take that as a compliment or insult though!

  19. David 132 Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Re: In full respect to the article wording...

    Excellent tree puns. I bough down in admiration.

    However, given that this is nominally an IT site, I'm surprised no-one has mentioned SAP yet. Tree sap, geddit?

    Oh, please yourselves.

  20. Pedigree-Pete Bronze badge
    Thumb Up

    Re: In full respect to the article wording...

    At the risk of being racist... abbastanza eccellente Giovani

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    People often forget that a tree looks much taller to children than it does to an adult.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What about tall children and small adults?

  23. disgruntled yank Silver badge

    Goodness

    Fair play demands that I tell you that there is a Christmas tree already set up just south of the White House. I haven't looked that closely, but I think that the sole decoration so far is a big ribbon in a dull red. Most likely the size would more than satisfy the Buriers--something around thirty feet, I suppose.

    Though I have long since become used to neighbors who put up Halloween decorations by the first of October, it does seem early to be putting up Christmas trees.

  24. hplasm Silver badge
    Coat

    Re: Goodness

    "there is a Christmas tree already set up just south of the White House"

    With a wiiggy effigy of The Great Trumpkin Pumpkin on top?

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: Goodness

    "the sole decoration so far is a big ribbon in a dull red."

    One of Donald's ties?

  26. The Dogs Meevonks

    Re: Goodness

    "One of Donald's ties?"

    They were originally going to decorate it in 'Lies' but couldn't find a tree big enough on the entire planet.

  27. Tom 7 Silver badge

    Re: Goodness

    I look forward to the coming storms blowing it to bits.

  28. Simon B-52

    Not Technical!

    This really isn't in any way technical or scientific, so what is it doing here?!

    Oh, I see. It offers numerous opportunities for double entendre and allusion to penile dimensions and engorgement - which is what technology is all about these days..........<sigh>.......

  29. Snivelling Wretch

    Re: Not Technical!

    Sometimes El Reg does branch out from it's core subject matter, but I can see this needles you.

  30. onefang
    IT Angle

    Re: Not Technical!

    "This really isn't in any way technical or scientific, so what is it doing here?!"

    It's in the Bootnotes section, you must be new here. Also, you left off the appropriate icon -->

  31. DavCrav Silver badge

    Re: Not Technical!

    "Oh, I see. It offers numerous opportunities for double entendre and allusion to penile dimensions and engorgement - which is what technology is all about these days..........<sigh>......."

    Speaking of double entendres, in German the act of doing physical exercise with a dog is referred to as das Dogging.

    I will just leave that here and walk away.

  32. DavCrav Silver badge

    Re: Not Technical!

    "It's in the Bootnotes section, you must be new here."

    He just hasn't twigged yet.

  33. BebopWeBop Silver badge

    Re: Not Technical!

    The fjords beckon fo this one.

  34. Locky
    IT Angle

    Re: Not Technical!

    As Aussie commentards would say;

    Spruce!

  35. 's water music Silver badge
    Coat

    Re: Not Technical!

    Speaking of double entendres, in German the act of doing physical exercise with a dog is referred to as das Dogging.

    uk=same, but single entendre shirley?

    I will just leave that here and walk away.

    Common doggers' conversation. Fnaar <explodes>

  36. Warm Braw Silver badge

    twee Christmas

    I think you missed a twick...

  37. onefang

    Are they planting it early, in the hope it will grow?

  38. Dave Pickles
    Coat

    I come to Bury St Edmunds...

    not to praise it.

  39. hplasm Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

    ----->

    nice one!

  40. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Happy

    Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

    After all these centuries, I just wish they'd get on and do the job!

  41. Esme

    Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

    Barking! (I'm being conecise)

  42. Tom 7 Silver badge

    Re: I come to Bury St Edmunds...

    Oh beehive.

  43. Andy The Hat Silver badge

    Christmas tree decorations are so repetitive - like Eastenders it's just a load of old balls.

    I'm off to have a pine for the fjords ...

  44. Herring`

    Maybe

    it was ordered by Nigel Tufnel.

    Used to work under a clueless head of development called Nigel. "It's not your job to be as confused as Nigel" was a stock phrase.

  45. Steve Cooper

    Southend's tree is more pot than tree - https://www.southendstandard.co.uk/news/17197000.is-it-too-early-for-southends-christmas-tree-to-go-up-column/

  46. defiler Silver badge

    Given the Christmas angle

    I'm surprised by the lack of Noel...

  47. BinkyTheMagicPaperclip Silver badge

    Plant one..

    My town decided one year to stop buying trees and permanently plant one on a roundabout. It was a bit unimpressive for the first couple of years, but has grown nicely now.

  48. ScarabMonkey

    I guess the residents are still sensitive after their free fireworks were cancelled this year [1] - and now a small tree! What is this country coming to!

    [1] https://www.eadt.co.uk/news/abbey-gardens-fireworks-cancelled-1-5763548

  49. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

    I blame Brexit and the bloody awful Warsaw Concerto.

  50. Commswonk Silver badge

    Bah Humbug

    That is all.

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