back to article Shift-work: Keyboards heaped in a field push North Yorks council's fly-tipping buttons

A cache of keyboards has been dumped in a field in North Yorkshire, England, leading to speculation that the person responsible for Deleting them from the face of the Earth didn't want to put in another Shift. The local authority with Ctrl over the Space where the plastic word-pianos were fly-tipped, Craven District Council, …

  1. }{amis}{ Silver badge
    Pint

    ARRRG the Punnage!

    Have one of these =>

  2. Rameses Niblick the Third Kerplunk Kerplunk Whoops Where's My Thribble? Silver badge
    Coat

    Re: ARRRG the Punnage!

    Yes, just like El Reg to "Insert" puns in to any random article. A "return" to form, you might say. If they keep it you, we all may well end up seeing *'s!

    </coat>

  3. imanidiot Silver badge

    Re: ARRRG the Punnage!

    Guys I really think we need to take a Pause/Break. We can't just keep dropping puns on this Page Down here. Someone might End up getting fed up and go Home.

  4. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

    Re: ARRRG the Punnage!

    If all the keyboards are removed, the next time the field is re-booted, will the crop grow in the form of an error message? Keyboard missing. Press F1 to continue.

  5. paulf Silver badge
    Alert

    Re: ARRRG the Punnage!

    I have a SUN keyboard on my Win box so I'm going to use "Stop" then "Help" to recover from all the Punnage.

  6. steviebuk Silver badge

    Re: ARRRG the Punnage!

    Or RETURN another day.

  7. fobobob

    Re: ARRRG the Punnage!

    These are the puns I was expecting... I guess they left some for us all to enjoy :) They've probably all been used by now, but hey, who's keeping Tabs?

  8. 2+2=5 Silver badge
    Joke

    Identifying the original owners...

    There's bound to be a password still stuck to the bottom of one or two of them - just publicise and see if anyone recognises 'their' password.

  9. IDoNotThinkSo
    Holmes

    Re: Identifying the original owners...

    Password123?

    That's mine!

  10. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

    Re: Identifying the original owners...

    Mine's Password123, and so's my wife's.

  11. Adam 1 Silver badge

    Re: Identifying the original owners...

    No. I'm Password123

  12. mosw

    Re: Identifying the original owners...

    "Mine's Password123, and so's my wife's."

    Are you sure you're not confusing a password with a safe word?

  13. mosw

    Re: Identifying the original owners...

    Just look for the Fn Ctrl freaks.

  14. chivo243 Silver badge
    Windows

    Just google a few serial numbers

    and off you go... Note to self, remove or obscure all serial numbers on old keyboards, wink, nudge!

  15. Ragarath

    Re: Just google a few serial numbers

    Or as this is obviously a business due to the amount. Just pay the few quid it costs to have it disposed of properly.

    On the other hand all Councils now actively encourage fly tipping IMO because they charge twice. First in your tax and then when you take stuff to the tip. Reap what you sow and all that.

  16. dave 81

    Re: Just google a few serial numbers

    If only Gordon Brown hadn't spent all the money during is 13 year reign, the councils would not be squeezed for funds.

  17. YetAnotherLocksmith

    Re: Just google a few serial numbers

    If only, after 8 years of cuts,the central government idiots could figure out that taking 20% off the top each time means there's f all left in the council's budgets. And no police to catch the fly tippers either.

    That you're still blaming a government that left the national debt in far better condition than it is right now, 2 (3?) general elections later, tells us something important about your ability with a budget.

  18. Stevie Silver badge

    Bah!

    Give ‘em a swipe with the alternative light source and see if anyone wrote “Property of Widdling Town Council” on anybof them in Dr Who Invisible Secret ink.

  19. Thoguht Silver badge

    Shifting old keyboards?

    Sounds like a job for Del boy.

  20. Crisp Silver badge

    Re: Shifting old keyboards?

    He probably wouldn't have the space.

    The shady characters that dumped them have no self-Ctrl.

  21. Adam 1 Silver badge

    Re: Shifting old keyboards?

    I'm pretty sure that even old keyboards have specific buttons when you want to shift them.

  22. Dave559

    Re: Del Boy

    You should deserve an extra upvote for double punnery there!

  23. The Original Steve

    Possibly the best article I've read on El Reg

    See title

  24. Spanners Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Examine them

    How many?

    Are they all the same type?

    What make?

    Standard KB or with extras? (EG mine has a smartcard reader)

    Anything other than food under the keys? Such as brick dust, fibres, plant bits and so on.

    The crud in there says a lot about the user...

  25. DJV Silver badge

    Re: Examine them

    The crud in there says a lot about the user...

    ...and so would the inevitable DNA that's very likely to be present as well.

  26. DavCrav Silver badge
    Joke

    Re: Examine them

    "and so would the inevitable DNA that's very likely to be present as well."

    That'll be helpful if the keyboards come from the local prison, but most people's DNA isn't on file with the authorities at the moment. This isn't Iceland, for God's sake.

  27. mark 120

    Re: Examine them

    No use to anyone though. If the keyboards are second hand, it only tells you who used them at some point in the past, not who dumped them. Even then, it only identifies that pool if their DNA is already on file, unless you're going to have a dragnet and sample everybody with at least one arm within 50 miles of Craven

  28. hplasm Silver badge
    Holmes

    Re: Examine them

    You missed this icon -->

  29. Warm Braw Silver badge

    I’m sure there’s a Fn + key combination that will help clear that

    See what happens when you press "Home"...

  30. Bronek Kozicki Silver badge

    Some white ones visible on the pictures

    I wonder if there is an original IBM keyboard somewhere among this scrap.

  31. Stoneshop Silver badge

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    The white ones I see have curved sides or rounded corners, so no worthwhile IBM keyboards.

    There's one with colour-coded keycaps, which looks to be a bit special.

  32. Peter2 Silver badge

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    Nobody is going to fly tip IBM model M's. Firstly, the resale value is so high that only an idiot would do it.

    Secondly, anybody trying to lift a stack of them would have collapsed with a hernia. The Model M is not exactly what you might call lightweight.

  33. }{amis}{ Silver badge
    Holmes

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    I'm going to guess this lot came from somewhere that has some form of teaching going on the colorful one in the pic looks like the type they use to teach touch typing in schools like : LessonBoard

    My bet would be on a local collage or maby prison had a refit done and somebody skimped on the disposal costs.

  34. Captain Scarlet Silver badge

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    Its only one though, lots of HP Microsoft and Dell keyboards in there. So basically it can come from any office in the UK.

  35. Stoneshop Silver badge

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    The Model M is not the only worthwhile IBM keyboard. They all share the same characteristics though: clicky, heavy and robust. Bash some luser's head in and just run it through the dishwasher before using again robust.

    They also had some very average plasticy spongy ones that came with the PS/2s and such.

  36. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    The model M should be the litteral weapon of choice for any self respecting techy.. though I remember Dell did a close running second for a while.

  37. Luiz Abdala
    Joke

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    In fact, if a single Model M had been dumped by mistake, it could be used to recycle the Apple ones quite easily. And type the report of the proper recycling afterwards.

    Like a hammer among nails.

    With a Brazzers logo on the corner.

  38. Tom 38 Silver badge

    Re: Some white ones visible on the pictures

    Nobody is going to fly tip IBM model M's. Firstly, the resale value is so high that only an idiot would do it.

    I got my model-m from keyboardco.com ~10 years ago for £24. If you want one now (I spilt sugary milky tea over mine, and it never properly cleaned, even after going through the dishwasher, hard to use it without R,D,F or G), you're looking for easily £100 - more if its a proper one made in the 80s (the late 90s one are _definitely_ not as good).

    Bought a daskeyboard 4 to replace it, also cost ~£100, nowhere near as good (keys keep repeating).

  39. Josco

    V.amusing but...

    There's a cost here in removing them for proper disposal, this cost has now passed to me through the taxes I pay.

  40. Hero Protagonist

    Re: V.amusing but...

    Yes, we must put an End to this practice. Can Any thing be done?

    (What, your keyboard doesn’t have an Any key?)

  41. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: V.amusing but...

    NEVER explain the joke.

  42. Peter2 Silver badge

    Re: V.amusing but...

    (What, your keyboard doesn’t have an Any key?)

    As you should explain to any user having trouble with this, the "any" key is the large unmarked key in the middle of the bottom row, also known as the "space" key.

    This has the positive effect of the user ending the call happy with IT, and thinking that they have learned something few other people know. They then spread that around with their friends, which as people tend to hang out with similar people tends to eliminate calls from their social circle too.

    It also has a slight chance that it might come out in the pub with their friends that they called the IT department asking which key was the "any key", leading to their friends saying to them what we want to say.

  43. DavCrav Silver badge

    Re: V.amusing but...

    "There's a cost here in removing them for proper disposal, this cost has now passed to me through the taxes I pay."

    Sort of. Shoving them in the back of a Council van is quick, and surely WEEE directives still apply, so the manufacturer is responsible. Or does that only apply to consumers?

  44. DougS Silver badge
    Trollface

    Perhaps

    They were dumped in a field one town over, and the people that found them didn't want to end up paying for disposal in their taxes so they re-dumped them in your town?

  45. Kernel Silver badge

    Re: Perhaps

    "They were dumped in a field one town over, and the people that found them didn't want to end up paying for disposal in their taxes so they re-dumped them in your town?"

    I believe there is precedent for this , dating back to the 11th century.

    The Norman invaders of England, in an attempt to reduce the numbers of dead Normans blotting the landscape, apparently passed a law that, in theory at least, would result in a significant fine for the Saxon village nearest to said dead Norman.

    I have read that what was actually achieved was a lot of late night re-dumping of dead Normans on some other villages patch in an attempt to mitigate the cost to the local taxpayers.

  46. jake Silver badge

    Re: V.amusing but...

    "the "any" key is the large unmarked key in the middle of the bottom row"

    Actually, the Any key is usually on the underside of the keybr0ad. Don't believe me? Next time you see that message, take a look! I'll bet you a nickle you will have pressed it.

  47. Toni the terrible
    Coffee/keyboard

    Re: V.amusing but...

    I can't believe that this joke has continued for so many years; a bit like the idea of typists putting correction fluid on their monitors or like tartan paint and buckets of sparks.

    However, there is often a 'reset' on the bottom of laptops - so I looked at the base of my PC's Redragon keyboard, much against my common sense, and of course found nothing. My laptop hoowever has several things to press on its underside, so.....

  48. Anonymous South African Coward Silver badge

    simples - query word piano dealers to see if somebody recently ordered a shedload of new word pianos.

    On second thoughts, could be the local BOFH getting rid of those word pianos in order to install a lager disposal unit (aka bar) in the basement.

  49. Dippywood

    Missed one!

    Upon Cursor-y examination...

  50. Aladdin Sane Silver badge

    Re: Missed one!

    Maybe they could Insert that at the End?

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