back to article Unsure why you can't log into Office 365? So is Microsoft

Microsoft's Office 365 has been giving some users cold sweats. No matter how hard they try to log in, they simply can't access the service and haven't been able to for hours – others say it has wobbled for days. Sporadic reports of unrest began to emerge on Down Detector on Friday (26 October) in the UK and across the pond, …

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  1. redpawn Silver badge

    When you buy Microsoft Services,

    You get Microsoft quality.

    1. Mark 85 Silver badge

      Re: When you buy Microsoft Services,

      Rely on other people's services and you get other people's problems. The "cloud" for mission critical applications/programs is never a good idea in spite of the hype and PHB's who follow the herd and latest trends.

    2. EastFinchleyite

      Re: When you buy Microsoft Services,

      Strange.

      My copy of Office 2003 doesn't seem to be affected. What is this cloud thing that everyone is talking about?

      1. CrazyOldCatMan Silver badge

        Re: When you buy Microsoft Services,

        What is this cloud thing that everyone is talking about?

        It's a regular phenomenon that will inevitably go away again at some point..

        (My IT career seems to have spanned at least two incarnations of it)

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "You'll need the Internet for this"

    No I won't. I've got the proper Office.

    1. yossarianuk

      Re: "You'll need the Internet for this"

      I have LibreOffice too

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "You'll need the Internet for this"

        You're using LibreOffice, aka reverse engineered Office 97 maintained by some nerds in their back bedrooms? Good for you, although consider upgrading to Lotus Shitesuite.

        1. hplasm Silver badge
          Windows

          Re: "You'll need the Internet for this"

          "Good for you, although consider upgrading to Lotus Shitesuite."

          And you are sat, twiddling your thumbs with MS support on-hold music...

      2. BobChip
        Happy

        Re: "You (won't)need the Internet for this"

        Correction - I have LibreOffice, so I don't need – or want – MS Office. At all. Simples.

        1. Jeffrey Nonken Silver badge

          Re: "You (won't)need the Internet for this"

          I have both.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's Aglie

    Fail fast, fail often, then put it in the cloud. That is what is says right here in this in flight magazine. Oooh, look, platinum golf clubs....

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge

      Re: It's Aglie

      Windows 10, Exchange, and now this.

      Never mind the testing, feel the Agile.

      1. hplasm Silver badge
        Happy

        Re: It's Aglie

        The FR is silent...

    2. Kane Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: It's Aglie

      "It's Aglie"

      You spelled "Ugly" wrong.

      1. Giovani Tapini

        Re: It's Aglie

        F@AC ail fast, Fail often yes, but when you put it in the cloud that becomes expected behaviour unlike internal services.

        We are learning (or being taught) to accept a Cr@p service because it's "Agile". I personally don't really want to be experimented on regularly with my primary tools my corporate masters decide I have no option to use however.

        Most people only use about 5% of the office capabilities anyway, and most of the changes now seem to be just to keep developers busy rather than improve the product. Win 10 is going the same way - development is becoming destabilising tinkering instead of actual development

        </RANT>

        1. Pascal Monett Silver badge

          Re: It's Aglie

          Agile is supposed to be how you develop something, not how you put in production. What is in production is supposed to be stable, but it would seem that the current IT crop has lost the definition of that word.

  4. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

    Come El Reg we know you want to say it...

    It has gone a bit TITSUP

    Not unusual these days sadly.

    I wonder when people will wake up and realise the size of the barrel that MS has them draped over?

    1. Vector

      Re: Come El Reg we know you want to say it...

      "I wonder when people will wake up and realise the size of the barrel that MS has them draped over?"

      It's not just Microsoft. Google wants you to do all your productivity work in the cloud too. In fact, it seems all of Sillycon Valley has been seduced to the cloud-side.

      I say, yet again, that all software developers who think using the cloud is a "good idea" should be dropped, on an annual basis, into the middle of the Mojave Desert with their precious cloud computing devices to see just how much work they can get done when there's no internet to be found.

      1. Jay Lenovo

        Re: Come El Reg we know you want to say it...

        Inspired by previous comments, "the cloud" really is more like "the fog".

        Effectively surrounded and blinded to any trouble within.

      2. Mark 85 Silver badge

        Re: Come El Reg we know you want to say it...

        In fact, it seems all of Sillycon Valley has been seduced to the wonderful profits of cloud-side.

        FTFY

      3. Kane Silver badge

        Re: Come El Reg we know you want to say it...

        "In fact, it seems all of Sillycon Valley has been seduced to the cloud-side."

        And they don't even have cookies.

      4. PhillW
        Happy

        Sillycon Valley

        I am so pinching that one

        1. jake Silver badge

          Re: Sillycon Valley

          It's more properly "Silly Con Valley". First used (that I am aware of) on the campuses of Stanford and Berkeley in the early 1970s.

    2. bombastic bob Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Come El Reg we know you want to say it...

      "It has gone a bit TITSUP"

      oooh you can't say that, because it implies something similar to 'NIPpleS'

      /me runs and hides, now

  5. Paul Herber

    So glad I don't have to rely on Office 365^H4^H3^H2

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Mushroom

      I had an email where someone talked about Office 360 - it looks oddly prescient...

      The only cloud icon -->

  6. terrythetech
    FAIL

    Never really liked the idea of the cloud for this very reason, or come to that, Microsoft.

  7. Domquark

    I can't resist....

    In the words of Nelson Muntz - "Ha Ha"

  8. Inventor of the Marmite Laser Silver badge

    Ah, the Cloud

    Wherein lies Cuckoo Land

  9. SImon Hobson Silver badge
    FAIL

    Why both sides of the Atlantic ?

    Isn't that obvious ? As was demonstrated when they had an "isolated" data centre failure, their systems are globally intertwined like a platetruckload of spaghetti. If you ever install a tool like Little Snitch and allow connections from Outlook one at a time then you will find that simply signing in requires the program to follow a long list of DNS redirects (from memory at least half a dozen) that send the connections all round the world.

    Given the way things seem to be built, it's a wonder it ever works at all !

    Also makes a mockery of any claims to be compliant with GDPR - I hope no-one here is using O365 for anything business related and relying on Microsoft's claims ;-)

    1. The Oncoming Scorn
      FAIL

      Re: Why both sides of the Atlantic ?

      It's hitting us at the moment, it's already bad & the users are starting to notice....

  10. el kabong

    Have they tried turning it off and on again?

    Microsoft taught us to do just that.

    And it really works!

    1. bombastic bob Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Have they tried turning it off and on again?

      THIS one really needs 30 seconds in the microwave

  11. HWwiz

    Crippled by Office 289

    We were totally crippled by this today.

    It has happened 1 to many times in the last year.

    We are now in serious discussions to bring exchange back online and migrate back to in-house.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: Crippled by Office 289

      I wonder whether there is a Fado song about cloud migration and the subsequent disillusion.

  12. SVV Silver badge

    The cloud ate my homework

    Great new excuse. Terrible thing to rely on as a business.

  13. steviebuk Silver badge

    So that explains...

    ....why I had 3 e-mails still sitting in the Outbox when I shut down at 5. Didn't notice much, restarted Outlook and all was fine.

  14. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Windows

    So the 365 in Office 365 means...

    The number of hours between submission and resolution of your tech support ticket??

    1. Craig 2

      Re: So the 365 in Office 365 means...

      No, it means Microsoft picked the most ironic name in software history :)

    2. Shadow Systems Silver badge

      Re: So the 365 in Office 365 means...

      Hours? You wish. Try days, weeks, months, years, or Galactic Epochs. This IS Microsoft we're talking about. =-}

    3. N2 Silver badge
      Trollface

      Re: So the 365 in Office 365 means...

      365 fuckups a year?

      1. redpawn Silver badge

        Re: So the 365 in Office 365 means...

        "365 fuckups a year?"

        That's only one per day.

    4. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: So the 365 in Office 365 means...

      The number of hours between submission and resolution of your tech support ticket??

      If you get a better Dominatrix than Miss Microsoft, the delay between submission and resolution need not be extended. Unless you WANT it that way.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Please for the love of god find a way

    I thought cloud was SO much better, oh dear. But hey, it's just the beginning, wait when you can't log in to your latest and bestest W10 buid. Oh, wait...

    1. The Oncoming Scorn
      Pirate

      Re: Please for the love of god find a way

      That's why I sign into my machines with a local account, not a Microsoft account.

  16. jake Silver badge

    Unsure why you can't log into Office 365?

    No, I'm not unsure at all. It's because I don't use it, nor other "cloud" so-called solutions. I wouldn't have anything to do with such a stupid, moronic idea if they gave it away for free AND paid for the Internet access required to use it.

  17. tempemeaty
    Joke

    Offline 365

    There, fixed the name.

    * runs away giggling *

    1. A.P. Veening

      Re: Offline 365

      Shame I can give you only one up-vote, this one deserve at least a dozen.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    When you use a cloud expect rain.

  19. Milton Silver badge

    Incomprehensible complexity

    I have a tiny (almost invisible) scrap of sympathy for the manijur-level ijits and their hasbeencounters who get suckered into cloud: they are so frequently the kind of twits who say things like "I don't do detail", as if they're actually proud of their laziness, or think it's clever to make whooshing-hand-over-head gestures when challenged by fourth-grade arithmetic—it's plainly true that air pollution has caused a massive drop in intelligence, if corporate senior management are any indication—BUT, to topic: they don't know any better. They'd accept anything a Microsoft saleslizard said to them if it promised a boost to their "cost savings" bonus next January.

    We technical types have no excuses.

    We know perfectly well that systems (sometimes not even massively large ones) can become so complex that no one person, however smart, can hold all of its functions and foibles in his/her head. The ever-increasing layers of programming have run the gamut in 50 years from punching in hex on a pad to writing incredibly abstracted, layered OO code with mouse clicks. We can build very complex and powerful systems, but with ever diminishing understanding of how the clockwork really meshes to make things happen even on a good day. It's easy to write today in ten minutes or an hour what would have taken a day or two many years ago; it's also predictable that the old code would have been sized in kilobytes at most, while the new will scale to megabytes at least.

    My point being that the ever-increasing and supposedly productivity-oriented layering of the cloud in particular has created multiple and incredibly elaborate levels of abstraction, some of it the result of algorithms creating other algorithms, often monitored and checked and managed by code whose only job is to handle the inevitable errors and exceptions, with the result that (a) no one truly understands even a tenth of it, (b) it is increasingly vulnerable to tiny glitches ramifying through the entire thing, causing entirely unpredictable and often bizarre effects, (c) it is too big and expensive to re-engineer for reliability, so instead it keeps acquiring cancerous "fixes", which are really hastily-slapped on kludges of sloppy code upon worse code upon bad code upon mediocre code upon what was once, when you dig deep enough, half-decent code.

    At some point, the cloud becomes monster of dubious reliability and, even worse, can no longer be provably defined as secure. Both consequences should be scary. "Cloud" really does mean "amorphous and poorly understood mess".

    Executives and bean-counters aren't capable of understanding this, I accept (and are incentivised not to understand anything which negatively affects remuneration anyway) ...

    ... but what excuse do the rest of us have?

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