back to article Stephen King's scary movie reboot provokes tears from 'legit clowns'

The imminent release of a new film adaptation of Stephen King's horror novel It has caused upset in the world of professional clowning. The clowns' concerns – doubtless accompanied by mimed theatrical sobbing, oversized hankies and streams of water from fake flowers – have been publicised by their professional body, the World …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It is worrying for the legitimate clowning industry as they could all lose their jobs and that would leave some pretty big shoes to fill.

    1. Hans Neeson-Bumpsadese Silver badge

      ^--- Comment Of The Week, right there.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        I should Coco

    2. macjules
      Coat

      Yes, very unfortunate. But you must admit that they do tend to get fired a lot.

      1. Tikimon

        ..."they get fired a lot".

        Out of cannons!

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Trollface

    "the World Clown Association."

    Is that a new name for the United States Congress ?

    1. Zippy's Sausage Factory

      Re: "the World Clown Association."

      Actually if you could swap the two organisations over, I think the USA might be a lot better run...

    2. Chemical Bob
      Coat

      Re: "the World Clown Association."

      The Trump Cabinet...

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The book came out in 1986, the Tim Curry miniseries in 1990. The "damage" is already done, guys...

    If I were you, I'd be more concerned with Juggalos, anyway.

    1. chivo243 Silver badge
      Trollface

      "If I were you, I'd be more concerned with Juggalos, anyway."

      Now that seems insane...

      1. Sir Runcible Spoon

        Don't forget the classic B movie - Killer Clowns from Outer Space

        1. VinceH
          Thumb Up

          "Don't forget the classic B movie - Killer Clowns from Outer Space"

          It's Killer Klowns from Outer Space - but upvoted anyway for referencing something I immediately thought of when reading the article.

          I must watch that again.

    2. John Smith 19 Gold badge
      Coat

      " the Tim Curry miniseries in 1990. "

      Ah the delightful Mr Curry, the go-to guy for louche (and a bit sinister) characters.

      I've often pictured a group of grumpy clowns sitting around their clubhouse (The WCA offices I suppose) throwing darts at a dart board with Stephen Kings face on it, grumbling "It's all his fault."

      Best clown story so far. From the film "Spy."*

      Rayna: There was a woman in my home village in Bulgaria. Should couldn't even sell her body. She just stood in the street dressed as a clown, doing magic tricks and crying constantly. You remind me of her.

      *It's not a good advertisement for Bulgaria either.

  4. Evil Auditor Silver badge

    King: when I was a kid I was scared of clown. Now clowns fear me.

    Seems fair.

  5. Anonymaus Cowark
    IT Angle

    It wasn't It.

    I am scared of clowns already since I saw 1988 an episode of Dr Who (The greatest show in the galaxy). Well before the TV Series IT in 1990. (There we have an IT angle!)

    1. Argh

      Re: It wasn't It.

      1988 was a good year for terrifying children with things they might see each day. "The Happiness Patrol" in Doctor Who that year also had that killer Bertie Bassett as well.

      1. Teiwaz

        Re: It wasn't It.

        1988 was a good year for terrifying children with things they might see each day. "The Happiness Patrol" in Doctor Who that year also had that killer Bertie Bassett as well.

        The sour faced ladies of the patrol were scary enough.

        With May still as P.M. - I'd not bet against Britain looking a little familiar to that episode once Brexit kicks in.

        1. Mark York 3 Silver badge
          Childcatcher

          Re: It wasn't It.

          As well as the cannibal grannies in Paradise Towers.

          Going further back Terror of The Autons (With some of the outside action taking place around a circus, keeping with the clown theme) by Robert Holmes - I'll let the man himself explain:

          ""He started telling me about the guidelines he felt the programme should follow. ‘Two or three seasons ago,’ he said, ‘we had some clot who wrote the most dreadful script.

          It had faceless policemen in it and plastic armchairs that went about swallowing people. I might tell you, there were questions in the House.

          Mrs. Whitehouse said we were turning the nation’s children into bed-wetters’. Could it be that he was referring to my ‘Terror of the Autons’? ‘Tut, tut’, I muttered, feeling the job slipping away. ‘how awfully irresponsible’.

          The elements in the story all came from plastic again. At the time there was a soap powder distributing plastic daffodils outside supermarkets, and I remembered all the warnings about children not being allowed near plastic bags. Then it all came together – I suddenly realised that all you need is a four-inch square of clingfilm to suffocate someone, and the spitting daffodils followed on.

          As for the doll and the armchair, well, there were some Danish troll dolls on the gimmick market at the time and I thought they were horrible, so I used that idea. Also, those plastic inflatable armchairs were all the rage, which is why I wrote in McDermott – specifically to kill him off in that chair!"

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Easily remedied I think...

    "The WCA has expressed fears that adverse publicity surrounding the film's killer clown character Pennywise will lead to cancelled bookings and financial difficulties for its members."

    Isn't that what an insurance is for?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Insurance

      Insurance *might* cover cancelled bookings, but it wouldn't cover loss of business arising from people just not booking at all

  7. Prst. V.Jeltz Silver badge

    Pterry portrayed clowns much more accurately

    1. Kane
      Thumb Up

      @ Prst. V.Jeltz

      Obligatory:

      “No clowns were funny. That was the whole purpose of a clown. People laughed at clowns, but only out of nervousness. The point of clowns was that, after watching them, anything else that happened seemed enjoyable.”

      ― Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

      .

      .

      .

      Where's the damned Pterry icon, El Reg?

  8. BoldMan

    Will it fail the same way as the Tim Curry version which was excellent until the fucking awful monster was revealed at the end at which point everyone burst out laughing but NOT because it was a funny clown?

  9. Scott Pedigo
    Gimp

    Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

    My favorite clown is the evil one in the 1997 film Spawn (based on the comic).

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120177/mediaviewer/rm3321600256

    1. EddieD

      Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

      Nah, Frasier Crane even before Sideshow Bob...

      1. Alister

        Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

        One of the scariest portrayals, which my daughter still refuses to watch, is Bradley Walsh in the Sarah Jane Adventures:

        http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1285083/

        I never thought of him as an actor, just a gameshow host and former footballer.

        1. Mark York 3 Silver badge
          Trollface

          Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

          I try not to think of him at all, but it may be inevitable.

          Icon because that's the mental image I get when thinking of Mr Walsh.

        2. h4rm0ny

          Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

          In my tinier years, I recall watching a TV series set in a lighthouse. One episode had ghost clowns and a scarecrow that came to life and crashed through the window. Probably my first ever exposure to something scary. Well, it's scary when you're six years old. So scary clowns go a long way back.

          And if you want really old examples, there was The Man Who Laughs, an old film from 1928 about a disfigured man in a circus.

          1. seanj

            Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

            "a TV series set in a lighthouse..."

            Round The Twist?

            http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103529/

            1. h4rm0ny
              Pint

              Re: Spawn Spawnned An Evil Clown

              Ha! Yes, that was the one. Round the Twist. I think I was too young to really understand it but I remember the scarecrow coming to life and crashing through a window to grab the girl. And she was the character I identified with so it was extra scary to me.

              Loved it, though.

          2. magickmark
            Childcatcher

            The Man Who Laughs

            An excellent film and many think was the inspiration for the 'Joker' from Batman

            See here

            https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=The+Man+Who+Laughs&newwindow=1&dcr=0&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjspufw95LWAhUHPFAKHUXYDz8QiR4ImgE&biw=1200&bih=816

            and here:

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man_Who_Laughs_(1928_film)

            Have fun kiddies

  10. ukgnome
    Childcatcher

    Nuclear War - nope

    A.I. - nope

    Guns - nope

    Bombs - nope

    Knives - nope

    Sluts - nope

    Clowns - agghhhh run away, ugh they are horrible and want to possibly kill you maybe.......

    Won't somebody think of the children

  11. TRT Silver badge

    The WCA?

    Do they expect to be taken seriously?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: The WCA?

      I guess so but I just think they are going to be left with pie on their face.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: The WCA?

      They were going to drive to Washington to protest, but as soon as they all got into the car, it fell apart.

    3. Korev Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: The WCA?

      Maybe they red nose something that we don't...

      1. TRT Silver badge

        Re: The WCA?

        If all the clowns go out of business, will we be treading on eggshells?

        1. Geoffrey W

          Re: The WCA?

          I remember an episode of The Avengers (Steed, not Marvel) where there were killer clowns running round. In it there was this guy who had all the clowns faces painted on eggs and I thought that's just too silly. Now I find it was true. Gosh!

          Tomorrow I'll discover there really are man eaters from Surrey Green, and Cybernauts. Eeek!

  12. GreggS

    So what's released on September 8th?

    1. TRT Silver badge

      September the 9th.

  13. AndrueC Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    I'm quite impressed that so far no one has posted the lame joke 'I wish they'd just stop clowning around'.

    Well done, folks.

  14. Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse

    I'll just leave this here, and then go hide under my duvet...

    That toy clown from the 1982 Poltergeist movie. I never liked that very much.

  15. Evil Auditor Silver badge

    Survey

    Is there someone out there who likes clowns?

    Please only respond if you do so.

    1. tiggity Silver badge

      Re: Survey

      It takes minimal imagination to dream up an image of a type of clown & outfit I would like ...

    2. Locky

      Re: Survey

      There are 2 types of people in the world. Those who are scared of clowns

      And clowns

    3. Mephistro

      Re: Survey

      I do. Not all of them, of course, but some of them are good at comedy, juggling and controlling masses of children.

      Hmmm... may be we should choose professional clowns to run our governments. I doubt they'll do it worse than the amateur ones running the show nowadays.

      8^)

      1. Chris G

        Re: Survey

        Mephisto. " controlling masses of children."

        That's because the poor little mites are terrified of them.

        1. Scroticus Canis
          Trollface

          Re: Survey - That's because the poor little mites are terrified of them.

          Works for me (once the screaming stops).

    4. Tom Melly

      Re: Survey

      I like them, I suppose. I mean, I'm certainly not frightened of them, and a good clown is a good clown.

  16. Mark Manderson

    only clown that scares me....

    is Amber Rudd.

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