back to article Microsoft wants to fling money at startups. Don't all rush at once

Microsoft is stretching out its foot to dip a tentative toe into the waters of early stage investment, under a revamp of its Microsoft Ventures programme. Announcing the plans to plough more money into startups, Nagraj Kashyap, veep at Microsoft Ventures, said: "In Microsoft’s history of engaging with and supporting startups, …

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Can't help but be reminded of a single panel cartoon were a start up was pitching to some VCs and the VC says, 'So your strategy is to be bought by IBM.'

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Paraphrasing slightly...

"Traditional desktop and laptop sales are down the toilet, our mobile strategy has failed although we do make some great 2-in-1 hardware (that often doesn't wake up) and we are having to play dirty tricks on our own customers just to get them to upgrade to Win10, even though it's free! We have no idea what's coming next, let alone have any ability to shape it - but someone out there has some great ideas and we want a piece of them before we lose all relevance."

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Megaphone

Re: Paraphrasing slightly...

"but someone out there has some great ideas and we want a piece of them"

Then when we've destroyed them and given them lots of cash not to proceed, it's back to business as usual. Roll up, roll up.... we need to ruin more tech.

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Re: Paraphrasing slightly...

"We've done a great job of retarding the IT industry for the last 20 years. We want to continue retarding it for the next 20".

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buzzword bingo

Full House

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I'd get them to invest in MY company, but...

I'd get them to invest in MY company, but... the kinds of things I work on wouldn't be in their _perceived_ best interest. And I'd hate to have the ones pulling the purse strings directing me to do things WRONG. Having the $ would be nice, especially NOW. I could probably use it to turn things profitable for them in the long haul, while paying my rent and having some left over to buy things.

But having them breathe down my neck and do what THEY perceive as "the future" ('play' to get paid in other words) would just get in the way. Past Performance Predicting Piss Poor Products in their case. *sigh*.

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Preparation is key

You will want to learn key protocols for dealing with the Redmond giant: https://rcpmag.com/Articles/2007/07/01/Minding-Your-Microsoft-Manners.aspx?m=1

And maybe look at what happens when you "win" a partnership deal: http://www.asymco.com/2011/02/11/in-memoriam-microsofts-previous-strategic-mobile-partners/

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Anonymous Coward

Time to brush up my pitch for my disruptive startup that uses machine learning on hololens to enrich the experience of windows users on Office365.

Basically, I plan to bring back Clippy, but this time in virtual reality.

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Anonymous Coward

Are you thinking 3D?

In which case, LOSER! I'm already pitching 4D to the 'soft! With audio in 7.6. Wow, Some people are so behind the curve!

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Anonymous Coward

Would you trust M$ with your great idea?

EEE

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