back to article Humans get 'aroused' fondling robots in their private areas – study

A study by Stanford University has shown that human volunteers demonstrated "physiological arousal" when a robot instructed them to touch it up. The research found humans instructed to touch a two-foot tall robot on the buttocks or eyes had a measurable increase in skin conductance, a sign of emotional arousal. They were also …

  1. Graham Marsden
    Alert

    Paging...

    ... Howard Wolowitz...

  2. This post has been deleted by its author

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

    2. Intractable Potsherd

      Was the experiment controlled for the embarrassment reaction that would be engendered by touching the robot whist observed by others? The responses described would fit with that reaction (people touching anatomically correct dolls have the same reaction).

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      1. How did the robot react?

      It started vibrating.

      How do you think the mouse reacted when 'Harmonica' started playing with his 'mouse organs',LOL?

      Even Larry Adler would have laughed his butt off.

  3. 404 Silver badge

    Humans...

    ...get aroused by everything and nothing at all... now gimme my grant money.

    Grant Money arouses me.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Humans...

      Watching people chasing after cash gets me going.

      Now get this ballgag in and get on that treadmill you naughty girl.

      You want this money eh?

      Yes thats it. Now tell how me you'll give me some good ROI.

      *sweats*

      15% per annum in the current fiscal climate you say? You filthy bitch. You're skimming off the top aren't you, you cheating naughty girl. Did you think I wouldnt find out? We're going to have to find a way for you to pay that back aren't we?

  4. Bluto Nash
    Thumb Up

    BABY!

    My Kuka Titan has those nice, big rounded bearings and that perky little tail on it - I mean, who can resist? Good looking piece of equipment, eh? EH? I get all greasy just THINKING about it. Nod's as good as a wink and all that? Say no more...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: BABY!

      The Kuka is mostly normal. You do not need to worry about it provided it is concencual as it is "above the size of concent".

      I would not be so sure about the robot in the pic though. Getting turned on by something that size and humanoid.... Hmmmm.....

  5. Sgt_Oddball Silver badge
    Coat

    I can see it already.

    Can you show the jury where he touched you?

    "whirring sound"

    Just here.

    "electronic gasps and mutterings"

    Mines the cloak next to the wig mi'lurd.

  6. allthecoolshortnamesweretaken Silver badge

    Won't anybody think of the robots?

    "Social conventions regarding touching someone else's private parts apply to a robot's body parts as well. This research has implications for both robot design and theory of artificial systems."

    Implications for robot design? Don't make any robots with 'private parts'.

    Also, if a robot complains that it has a terrible pain in its diodes, replace them.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Won't anybody think of the robots?

      Where else are we to put the on/off switch?

      Anon, because someone will be stupid enough to do it.

      1. Cynic_999 Silver badge

        Re: Won't anybody think of the robots?

        "

        Where else are we to put the on/off switch?

        "

        https://www.flickr.com/photos/tonybilliards/5543480726

  7. Bluto Nash
    Facepalm

    And ANOTHER thing...

    " humans instructed to touch a two-foot tall robot on the buttocks"

    Robots don't have "buttocks", you gits.

    1. Pompous Git Silver badge

      Re: And ANOTHER thing...

      Robots don't have "buttocks", you gits.

      Anita does. And I'm the only real Git around here. Git it?

      1. Bluto Nash

        Re: And ANOTHER thing...

        Dammit. I KNEW I should have used "pillocks" instead...

        1. Pompous Git Silver badge

          Re: And ANOTHER thing...

          Dammit. I KNEW I should have used "pillocks" instead...

          Anita doesn't have a pillock (M.E. pillicock) either; she has a cunt. Only dude I ever heard of with more than one pillock was Stacy Brown ;-)

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6-zTy6DZ3E

  8. TRT Silver badge

    Well spin my nipple nuts

    and call me Shirley...

  9. Eddy Ito Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    while others say that attitudes will change and robots will handle the sex trade in the not-too-distant future.

    Yup, I can hear the data collection boys at the GOOG and NSA giggling about it from here.

  10. Someone_Somewhere

    NSFW

    https://vimeo.com/39271802

  11. x 7 Silver badge

    funny.....I don't get hot and sweaty when I touch a randy mandy doll. Maybe orbots are more tactile in some way?

    1. This post has been deleted by its author

      1. x 7 Silver badge

        "What is an orbot?"

        1) a spelling mistake

        2) a prostitute robot (short for whore-robot - imagine saying it with a french accent)

        your choice

        1. Old Handle
          Linux

          It's actually the App version of Tor. Runs on Android, appropriately enough.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      You might not think you do, but penile plethysmography would show if you were sexually aroused by touching said doll. Note the study referred to by the article measured physiological arousal which is not the same thing as sexual arousal.

  12. notfunny_notfunnyatall

    Double Polaroid

    Obligatory: https://youtu.be/0ofl_UP3apM?t=58

  13. EastFinchleyite

    Frank Zappa did it all decdes ago.

    Anyone with any taste who has an interest with sexually arousing robots has a copy of Joe's Garage.

    In the extended story line. Joe (having caught a an STI and is seeking redemption through religion) joins the First Church of Appliantology run by L Ron Hoover) where you go into the closet to seek freedom. That is where all the groovy appliances live.

    Joe hooks up with a German speaking sex robot, a pan-sexual auto-plooker, Sy Borg, which is a chrome-plated machine that looks like a magical pig with marital aids stuck all over it.

    Bad things happen to Joe.

    http://globalia.net/donlope/fz/lyrics/Joe%27s_Garage.html

    Such is life.

    1. chivo243 Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Frank Zappa did it all decdes ago.

      @EastFinchleyite

      that looks like it's a cross between an industrial vacuum

      cleaner and a chrome piggy bank with marital aids stuck all over its body...

      it's really exciting...and when he sees it, he BURSTS INTO SONG...

      Is that all that bursts?

      Joe's Garage and Thing-Fish are all one needs from Frank ;-}

  14. Mitoo Bobsworth
    Joke

    "Bumblebee, stop lubricating the man."

    As long as it's consensual & they're both happy, it shouldn't be a problem.

    Honestly, science can be so pervy sometimes...

  15. heyrick Silver badge

    A robot that size?

    It'd be like touching up a young child. Eww.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A robot that size?

      Was going to say something similar myself.

      Perhaps they should have done it with robots that looked like this instead. (Probably NSFW...!)

      1. heyrick Silver badge

        Re: A robot that size?

        Wow. That's a lot of chrome.

        Personally, Briareos Hecatonchires is my idea of what a humanoid robot should look like. Not at all sexy, but makes up for that with plenty of random awesomeness.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A robot that size?

      I guess they proved there are more pedos out there than you might think.

  16. well meaning but ultimately self defeating

    Location location location

    A conference at Fukuoka... surely you jest

  17. Tromos
    Joke

    New series of porn films

    Robocock 1, 2 and 3.

    1. Francis Boyle Silver badge

      New series?

      Great. I've been waiting for a remake of the Robocock series for years.

  18. This post has been deleted by its author

  19. Uncle Slacky Silver badge
    Stop

    Obligatory Futurama reference

    DON'T DATE ROBOTS!!!!!

    1. Rosie Davies

      Re: Obligatory Futurama reference

      I was thinking more along the lines of "kiss my shiny, metal..." myself.

      Rosie

  20. Arctic fox
    Trollface

    "Humans get 'aroused' fondling robots in their private areas "

    "Very sad losers get aroused fondling robots in their private areas". FIFY.

  21. NanoMeter

    Excuse me for being old fashioned

    I think I need to fondle the real thing to get aroused.

  22. This post has been deleted by its author

  23. Evil Auditor Silver badge

    Robophiles?

    1. hplasm Silver badge
      Happy

      Robophiles?

      Cyberpaedos.

      Now to get the Trrrrrrsts on board for the set!

  24. Psmiffy
    Coffee/keyboard

    Why?

    Why is this not in Boot(y)notes?

    I pay my subscriptions and everything!

  25. x 7 Silver badge

    women seem to have a higher need for mechanical aids.....was there any noticeable difference between men's and women's reactions when bot-fondling?

  26. Danny 4

    Fondling Robots

    Reminds me of the Björkbots making out in the All is Full of Love video.

  27. Dick Emery

    Roboto otoko

    Chi turns on. Chi turns off. Chi turns on. Chi turns off...

    PANTSU!

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    but ...

    Robots don't have private parts, (except inside the casing - maybe some IP)... and what if you refuse or decline ?

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