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back to article Name that HPE boozer: Last orders please

Our call for potential names for Hewlett Packard Enterprise's private London drinking club has prompted the expected rush to the bar from readers. The paradigm-busting green rectangle formerly known as HP or Hewlett Packard or whatever will serve up booze and music to punters at its new City of London HQ at 1 Aldermanbury …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The cock inn

    0 0 Reply
    1. Anonymous Coward
      Reply Icon
      Anonymous Coward

      "Project Make It Better"

      0 0 Reply
  2. Efros

    What Carly Did Last

    0 0 Reply
  3. BebopWeBop
    Trollface

    No

    I want to see the episode where the BOFH and sidekick crash the new venue

    5 0 Reply
  4. jake Silver badge

    Obvious answer: Building Five.

    South-west corner of Deer Creek and Arastradero. Never built.

    HP decided to leave it as open space 45 years ago. Tesla (the "green" company) likes to use it as office space. Bastards.

    0 1 Reply
  5. chivo243 Silver badge

    no winners yet?

    I would have thought the commentards would have filled the basket with winners?

    0 0 Reply
    1. Mark 85
      Reply Icon

      Re: no winners yet?

      I'm sure we have, but there's those falling by the wayside who haven't put in their tuppence.

      Sidenote... spell check doesn't like "tuppence". Very strange.

      0 0 Reply
      1. Anonymous Coward
        Reply Icon
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: no winners yet?

        spelling is "twopence" - pronunciation is a different kettle of ghoti

        2 0 Reply
        1. Mark 85
          Reply Icon

          Re: no winners yet?

          Google shows me both.... <sigh>

          0 0 Reply
    2. Anonymous Coward
      Reply Icon
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: no winners yet?

      I guess they haven't seen enough options they like yet to begin the voting. I'm voting for "The Box and Padding" as suggested by someone in the last article. If there's any justice in the world that will win it going away.

      Of course it doesn't matter, HPE will pick something horribly mundane since they'll have various bigwigs from Fortune 100 companies there from time to time and won't want to run the risk of anyone being offended or worse yet cracking a smile at HP's expense.

      0 0 Reply
  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The Verdant Quadrilateral

    2 0 Reply
    1. BlartVersenwaldIII
      Reply Icon
      Pint

      Complete with the Chartreuse Polygon cocktail bar, the Jade(d) Piazza pizza parlour and the Khaki Khazi?

      0 0 Reply
  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The green rectangle...

    represents the dimensions of the one inch high browser panel for reading 30 page long EULAs.

    0 0 Reply
  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The Empty Green Rectangle.

    0 0 Reply
  9. Jos V

    bar?

    "The Stuck Side-Bar"

    Today's Special:

    Large Coffee (incl. cream, sugar, whip cream and a wafer): $0,25 *

    *Refill: $24,95

    1 0 Reply
    1. Efros
      Reply Icon

      Re: bar?

      Nah

      * Cup:$24.95

      1 0 Reply
  10. Sir Sham Cad

    Oh go on then.

    The Rectangle and Writedown

    Club Meg

    HPPUHQ (HP Pissup HQ)

    3 0 Reply
  11. Trev the Rev

    The Duck and Turkey

    All-day menu available, Service optional*

    * HPES losing the services to become HPE

    0 0 Reply
  12. TitterYeNot

    Well, if it's a drinking hole for what's left of HP's services workforce after the layoffs, I'd say 'The Nobodys Inn' would do quite nicely.

    Or the 'The Faucet Inn' if it's a bar for HP engineers...

    3 0 Reply
  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Autonomy Now

    The Due Diligence

    The Fink Nottle.

    0 0 Reply
  14. Ian Mason
    Pint

    The Bung and Backhander

    As it'll most probably be full of sales and marketing types - The Bung and Backhander

    1 0 Reply
  15. Colin Ritchie
    Coat

    The HP Pavilion

    They can really iPAQ them in.

    2 1 Reply
  16. John439

    The Jolly Roger

    My suggestion was the Jolly Roger, where managers take you for a free drink to tell you your being made redundant....

    0 0 Reply
  17. lawndart

    The Broken Seal and Bubblewrap

    0 0 Reply
  18. InfiniteApathy

    A bar for HP Employees?

    Seems only fitting to call it "The Sauce"

    1 0 Reply
  19. .@.

    Ah, just thought of another one ...

    "Hewlett You Inn?"

    2 0 Reply
  20. Proctalgia Fugax

    My thought(s)

    Star Trek:Enterprise NCC 1701 - not the best of the bunch, either grape or banana, more of a lemon actually.

    So HP Enterprise would have to be - The Suck IT and 'C'

    with a big Lemon as the pub sign. Can't call the place an Inn, because it may not be an 'Inn Place', you are more likely to be out on your (r)ear.

    As to it qualifications to be a bar, it certainly needs propping up.

    0 0 Reply
  21. David Roberts

    Too late to enter...

    .....but should it be anything else but the Gentleman Loser?

    Although El Reg staf in general may not immediately get the reference (judging by recent past performance). :-(

    0 0 Reply
    1. TeeCee Gold badge
      Reply Icon

      Re: Too late to enter...

      Surely the clientele of the Gentleman Loser really knew their stuff when it came to serious computer shit.

      Can't see the connection myself.

      0 0 Reply
  22. Muad'Dib

    Surely it's obvious

    The core of HP's business is flogging Silicon and charging like a wounded Rhino for the privilege, so I think "The RAM and Fleece" is apposite.

    2 0 Reply

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