back to article Hash-tag CompSci: FBI grooms pre-weed teens

The FBI is launching a pilot programme to groom teenage hackers for "the mission" before said hackers start hitting the bong – or get well-paid positions at private sector companies. The pilot programme will be rolled out next autumn, reports the Financial Times (behind paywall), and will see the agency offering computer …

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Give me a child to the age of 7

Need to get them before they start doing all this thinking/questioning authority stuff

Perhaps if we could get them to all wear matching uniforms and swear allegiance to the leader in school every day.

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Big Brother

Re: Give me a child to the age of 7

"The Corps is mother, the Corps is father. Obey the Corps."

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FAIL

War on Terror meets War on Drugs

pass the popcorn ....

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Re: War on Terror meets War on Drugs

Munchies already?

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smoking weed going to the interview? Do they think FBI stands for 'Full Bong, Init' ?

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Anonymous Coward

In other words, they aren't willing to pay proper wages for said talent so they are going to try and get to them before they figure out what the wage would be in the real world and use good old patriotism to keep them fighting all those terrorists that are lurking online these days by using mass surveillance. Brilliant idea.

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Dodgy?

Doesn't this count as grooming? Is that still legal in the Land of the unFree?

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Anonymous Coward

Personally, I'd *want* tokers

They've already signalled they can see through hype .....

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Happy

...and if three people do it...

Walk in, sing a bar of Alice's Restaurant, and walk out.

// they may think it's a movement

// FBI -- wouldn't be surprised if they did

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Anonymous Coward

D'oh!

Many years ago I met a guy (I've forgotten his name so waterboarding won't work) whose sister was dating a customs officer. As a joke he asked if he could get hold of some weed, the officer replied that they had tons of it. So with 50 bucks offered he expected to get somewhere in the region of a tobacco tins worth of the stuff. When he met the officer he has a carrier bag full of it! This happened twice!! His comment was "I was the most popular person in $location that summer" :) :)

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Time to stop caring about smoking weed.

The "Drug War" has almost destroyed this country.

Now it is getting in the way of finding law enforcement officers.

Simply end it.

It cannot be won under any conceivable circumstances, and it has no benefits to society whatsoever. Rather the opposite.

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Re: Time to stop caring about smoking weed.

At some point, it'll change. It's in the process now as several states do allow "recreational" marijuana to be sold and it's taxed. It'll be a painful process for TLA's like the FBI however.

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Re: Time to stop caring about smoking weed.

I would say it has more to do with law enforcement in the US versus using MJ. Basically the simplest step to take for the FBI to improve recruit is to institute a new that the FBI will under federal law investigate all complaints against local and state law enforcement to ensure policing starts to occur in the US, instead of law enforcement operating as judge, jury and public executioner.

Basically all policing in the US gets tarred by the same brush no matter how small a local law enforcement branch is when it blatantly publicly misbehaves and abuses citizens rights. That investigation will build a better perception of the FBI and hugely aid in recruiting.

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High school?

High school? Isn't that too late? I mean, it's called "high" school for a reason. I would think this would be plenty late enough, too, for people to be wondering "should I really be working for the feds?"* and wondering about rates of pay.

Anyway, what Ben Burch said, what they really need to do is quit worrying about recreational drug use. They should be concerned if someone's addicted to anything (including alcohol) (since it could end up affecting their on-the-job performance if they become more and more addicted), but the odd puff or drink off-the-clock should be none of their concern. I think a problem they run into here... their pay isn't just below market rate... the market that rate is compared to expects a 40-hour work week, while the FBI expects to control your behavior 24/7, that's 168 hours a week. To be told what to do "off the clock", people expect on-call pay or some kind of compensation.. so the FBI is actually paying severely below rate.

*To be honest, I think this is one problem they're probably having.. I haven't heard about the FBI running illegal and unconstitutional programs like some 3-letter agencies I could name. But I get the impression some of the general public just view the whole thing as "the feds", and assume they act much more as a monolithic entity than they really do (and so would assume if one agency misbehaves they all do.)

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Re: High school?

The FBI does everything the CIA does but on US soil. But don't worry, anything that might be illegal is approved by a secret court

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Black Helicopters

Desperation

FBI director James Comey told the White Collar Crime Institute that recruitment was a nuisance as "some of those kids want to smoke weed on the way to the interview".

Put out that joint boy! Join us in the mission to rid the world of the evil that is marijuana publicly-available strong encryption.

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Windows

Simple proof that the FBI can't decypher *anything*

They can't figure out that they're too damned cheap.

which is why they want back doors.

which really indicates a problem, since if they can't figure *that* out......... what else are they missing?

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First it was the Jesuits

Ignatius of Loyola said, "Give me a boy before the age of seven and he will be mine forever."

Now the agency known for a cross-dressing former director wants boys too. Are they going to use them like priests have been doing lately?

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How about stop caring what people do in their spare time...

...and start caring about how well they do their job?

If their drug taking adversely affects their job performance, then fire them.

If not, then keep them.

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It is real easy to solve the staffing problem

Just open the damn wallet. If they can spend billions on equipment that isn't used but find that they can't use it for whatever reason maybe if they would pay people what they are really worth then they wouldn't have a staffing problem. You offer 200K+ a year for good programmers and there would be a stampede. They could then have very high standards and actually accomplish something. Going the route of capturing, torturing criminal CompSci peeps is only going to get you so far. Indocturning the little kiddies from the age of seven is only going to get you so far.... Maybe if you were to farm the children in some third world nation and control their every waking moment from birth on to follow their masters every word and command to learn coding and lay down their lives for the CIA/NSA in the name of the USA, then maybe they could do that cheaper. But if they want results now it is best to just pay people what they are worth. OR I could do a big study and charge them a paltry 100 million for the study and tell them the same thing.

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FAIL

and if you smoke weed ......

Poor assumptions about any candidates "worth" which are based in ignorance of the fact that, pot was only made illegal in order to provide an open market place for the tobacco companies.

Any decent pot smoker will comprehend straight away that working for such an unintelligent organisation (Farcical Buffons and Idiots) will result in being underpaid and continually being the butt of jokes cracked by your hacker mates because you spend all your days rooting about in Windows 8/10 machines.

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Devil

Re: and if you smoke weed ......

It wasn't the tobacco companies they were trying to help. It was the paper companies - both the people that made poor quality paper and the people who made poor quality papers.

Specifically William Randolph Hearst (Pattys grandpa) helped push the laws which conveniently also blocked imports of cheaper, hemp based, paper made in Mexico.

I think Lisa Simpson has mentioned it.

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Just Say NO

Unless your an anal type, those FBI computer security classes are not for you. If you have any intention at all of rebelling against authority, those FBI computer security classes are not for you, you would be basically handing over a full psych profile of yourself and tagging yourself for life.

FBI computer security classes, basically for anal retentive types only, everyone else stay away because there is no plus side for you. There is no cool in getting a permanent invisible government tattoo right smack in the middle of your forehead.

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