back to article Obsolescence of food is complete: Soylent now comes in bottles

Soylent, the startup dedicated to conquering the universally hated ritual of eating food, now offers a version of its protein-rich nutrient gloop in ready-to-drink bottles. Previous versions of Soylent arrived as powders that you mix with water. That takes time, much like it does to sear a cut of filet mignon lightly on both …

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  1. Monkey Bob
    Unhappy

    Dammit

    Hungry now...

    1. Giles C Silver badge

      Re: Dammit

      Agreed, but only for the non soylent food mentioned in the article.

      1. Anonymous Custard

        Re: Dammit

        Indeed, from crispy bacon onward...!

        <homer>Mmmm, bacon...</homer>

  2. chivo243 Silver badge
    Headmaster

    Transporting water?

    I thought part of this great idea was that it was powdered, and the transportation cost would be kept down?

    1. PleebSmash
      Happy

      Re: Transporting water?

      This is for that tier of people who are too scared or can't be arsed to add powder to water, but still want all of what Soylent offers.

      1. Martin Budden Silver badge

        Re: Transporting water?

        It could also be useful for people who live in areas where clean drinking water is hard to come by. For example, the good citizens of Mumbai could drink Soylent 2.0 instead of going to all the bother of preparing exquisitely spiced dishes such as baida roti, butter chicken with naan, or gujarati thaalis.

    2. Thorne

      Re: Transporting water?

      "I thought part of this great idea was that it was powdered, and the transportation cost would be kept down?"

      It was but clearly people too lazy to cook are also too lazy to add water.......

      1. JDX Gold badge

        Re: Transporting water?

        I struggle to believe you're really that stupid not to see that this has uses. Clearly you've never seen ready-to-drink milkshakes on sale, only the kind you mix your own milk with powder. Or pre-made sandwiches, only shops selling bread and ham separately.

        If you want lunch at work or while travelling, faffing about mixing things together IS clearly a faff and if the point of this product is convenience, then more convenience is clearly better.

    3. Fink-Nottle
      Coat

      Re: Transporting water?

      > I thought part of this great idea was that it was powdered, and the transportation cost would be kept down?

      So ... Soylent isn't green.

    4. Elfo74
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: Transporting water?

      They can now make a pipeline...

      ...just imagine: soylent-on-tap!

  3. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

    Space-war astronaut fodder.....

    ...on EARRRRTTTHHHH!

  4. asdf
    Joke

    can't resist

    Well I guess another box can be checked for things that will happen as we turn into The Matrix.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sad, sad fucks

    The only hope is that with the expected enormous demand they end up making the stuff in one of those Chinese factories that doesn't make baby milk powder any more. That'd take care of both the idiots who buy it and those behind this abomination, assuming the Chinese got the firing squad back in again for the Soylent team.

    1. Tomato42
      Meh

      Re: Sad, sad fucks

      dude, chill out

      they are not selling Zyklon B...

      1. itzman
        Trollface

        Re: Sad, sad fucks

        they are not selling Zyklon B...

        ...yet...

    2. Thorne

      Re: Sad, sad fucks

      The more idiots that live on this stuff, the more bacon for everyone else.....

  6. Rusty 1
    Stop

    "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

    That sounds like it is the very essence of the problem, and the thing that should be addressed. Surely once the masses have some streaky or a bit of back turning up at their door in time for breakfast, the world cannot help but be a better place.

    A little more effort into growing bacon and distributing it would probably even right Greece's ailing economy.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

      What irretrievably ails Greece's economy is actually pork. Lots of it.

      1. Thorne

        Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

        And if you smoked said pork the problems would be solved......

        1. itzman
          Trollface

          Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

          And if you smoked said pork the problems would be solved......

          ...until they showed it gave you lung cancer.

          1. Neil Barnes Silver badge

            Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

            Bacon-flavoured soylent is already available in Norway... http://bgo.mve.no/media/catalog/product/cache/7/small_image/258x245/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/s/t/stabburet_grov.jpg

    2. Martin Summers Silver badge

      Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

      They could make bacon flavour Soylent? Might give it a punt then.

      1. Lord Raa

        Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

        I think I remember there being some kind of algae based bacon-flavoured thing announced recently.

        Maybe they could combine the two?

    3. Ralph B
      Mushroom

      Re: "Unlike crispy bacon, Soylent 2.0 is available on a subscription basis"

      Of course there are already bacon subscription services. Try this one or google others.

      Sometimes I wonder if The Reg are losing it.

    4. Ken 16 Silver badge
      Mushroom

      This is a Pot Noodle competitor isn't it?

      People eating this would be having a protein shake or a pot noodle anyway, not a sit down meal.

      1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

        Re: This is a Pot Noodle competitor isn't it?

        People eating this would be having a protein shake or a pot noodle anyway, not a sit down meal.

        I'd rather get most of my calories1 from pot noodle for a month than make do with Soylent for a day. At least instant ramen has some heat, a little texture, and something vaguely approximating flavor.

        1I was going to write "live on", but on reflection that idea is absurd. Obviously I'd need some source of actual nutrition.

  7. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    "soy protein, carbohydrates, and other nutrient-rich ingredients"

    Nutrient-rich ingredients my ass. That slop doesn't fill a working man's stomach.

    Give me a steak with potatoes any day. And if you don't know how to cook that, you deserve all the slop you get.

    Cooking. It's what elevated us from the caveman. Let's not forget that important point of evolution, shall we ?

    1. Martin Budden Silver badge
      Pint

      Re: "soy protein, carbohydrates, and other nutrient-rich ingredients"

      It was something even more important than cooking which elevated us from the caveman. See icon.

    2. dan1980

      Re: "soy protein, carbohydrates, and other nutrient-rich ingredients"

      @Pascal

      It's unclear whether you are talking about biological evolution or social evolution.

      In terms of biology, humans have been 'humans' for at least tens of thousands of years and very probably around 200,000 years. It is thought that control of fire was achieved prior to this evolutionary milestone and there is indeed a theory that cooking food resulted in better nutrition which in turn assisted in brain development.

      But, biologically, the fact that it was COOKED is not really relevant - simply that better nutrition was available. In that sense, it matters not one whit whether you have consumed that nutrition after lovingly preparing a sumptuous meal or after chugging a bottle of goop; if the nutrition is there then your body doesn't care how it came about.

      Fire and cooking was also important socially, however and contributed to that side of our evolution. Specifically, it allowed more time for other pursuits as night was no longer a barrier.

      On that measure, however, the far greater development was agriculture, which finally allowed humans to manage their food sources better and to produce surpluses. This in turn allowed people to specialise and enabled trade and so on.

      So, when it comes to social evolution, allowing people to satisfy their nutritional needs without having to spend time gathering and producing and preparing it is what is important - you are freeing people from that burden so they can spend their time on other pursuits.

      Of course, for many people that just means more time to watch TV or people working themselves to the bone, skipping lunch breaks, and so on but the point is that from an evolutionary standpoint, the important developments are available nutrition and available time, both of which this product satisfies.

      But anyway, it's not necessarily logical to say that something that prompted or produced an evolutionary change towards modern humans in the past is necessarily going to be a good thing now or in the future.

      Take the climate change that resulted in deforestation and pressed our ape-like ancestors 'come down from the trees' and to slowly adapt to a lifestyle on the plains, including developing a more upright posture, which freed their hands and so allowed for the development of tools.

      Does that mean that deforestation is a good thing now?

  8. Mark 85

    I thought the reason we evolved..

    ...was to cook.. bbq... make things tasty and crispy. This stuff sounds like an abomination but I'm sure that as soon as someone like Oprah or Dr. Of-The-Month shows up in the media recommending it that it will take off.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I thought the reason we evolved..

      ...was to cook.. bbq... make things tasty and crispy.

      That's correct. The magical confluence of men, beer, fire, meat, bread, and sunshine. Unfortunately the ladies don't seem to understand the simplicity of the idea, and I'd just like to make a public appeal to women of planet earth:

      A barbecue does not involve salad. Ever. Or coleslaw. Or cous cous. Or vegetables. Or fancy gastro-pub style ten deck gourmet burgers. Or any meat products purchased from a supermarket (with possibly a solitary exception for home made burgers from supermarket bought mince).

      And for the gents, a polite reminder: No Budweiser or similar camp drinks.

      1. Pirate Dave Silver badge
        Pirate

        Re: I thought the reason we evolved..

        No coleslaw at a barbecue? but it's good on barbecue...

  9. Graham Marsden
    Boffin

    Sneer at this if you want...

    ... but how many geeks on here would find it even more convenient if they could simply plug in a power cord and recharge, rather than have to waste valuable computer time cooking and eating food?

    1. Thorne
      Joke

      Re: Sneer at this if you want...

      Sorry but I have no desire to insert a powercord there......

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Meh

      Re: Sneer at this if you want...

      The Geeks may want it, the rest of us in the human race, do not.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Sneer at this if you want...

        The Geeks may want it, the rest of us in the human race, do not.

        It's not mandatory. Nobody's forcing you. If you're not interested, just pass on by.

        There's really no reason for so many people to be so hostile to the idea that other people may have different priorities.

        1. Neil Barnes Silver badge
          Holmes

          Re: Sneer at this if you want...

          I think there's a difference between being hostile to an idea and considering the idea utterly laughable.

        2. Naughtyhorse

          Re: Sneer at this if you want...

          To be fair it's a pretty dumb idea, and it would not come as much of a shock that, after some time in the wild there were some significant health comebacks.

          plus no one mentioned the colossal and exquisitely revolting farts that accompany the fad.

          still cooler than a smartwatch tho

        3. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

          Re: Sneer at this if you want...

          There's really no reason for so many people to be so hostile to the idea that other people may have different priorities.

          Clearly you're new to the Internet. And quite possibly to humanity. Welcome to Earth! Try to avoid Philadelphia if your head is easily removable.

    3. BlartVersenwaldIII

      Re: Sneer at this if you want...

      I'm not sneering but... perhaps I'm unusual but I consider myself a geek and have never, ever been afraid to take breaks from being sat in front of a computer when it's time to prepare something delicious. Christmas dinner for example - that takes at least a couple of days to prepare for (not counting the weeks beforehand feeding the pudding that you cooked in november and were soaking the fruit for since june) but it's totally worth it.

      Food for me isn't just a source of nutrition, it's also pleasure. So much so that I don't think I can fully comprehend people who eat without pleasure...

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Sneer at this if you want...

      "but how many geeks on here would find it even more convenient if they could simply plug in a power cord and recharge,"

      I tried that once as a child. It really doesn't work.

  10. Zarno
    WTF?

    I thought hospitals already had this...

    Isn't this the same as the stuff used for nasogastric feeding?

    I think I'd rather have some grilled swordfish with grilled zucchini and squash, a pasta salad, and wash it down with a semi sweet white wine.

    1. dan1980

      Re: I thought hospitals already had this...

      Most people would but then most people would also prefer to have a leisurely breakfast and long shower in the morning before taking a nice stroll over to work. Unfortunately, the reality for most people is that they have a quick bite, a quick shower and then squeeze into a train/bus or fight the traffic.

      I'd like to have the time to cover my face in a warm, damp towel, while my brush softens and my purified rainwater heats up, then work up a nice lather of Mitchell's, get out the Merkur and enjoy a nice, close shave.

      But, of course, on a Monday morning I instead rev up the electric and take a few passes to make me respectable - sometimes while simultaneously getting though my toast.

      Also, anyone who has had to subsist for any length of time on current meal substitutes, as provided by hospitals, will attest to their unsuitability.

      1. Roq D. Kasba

        Re: I thought hospitals already had this...

        @dan, May I recommend optimising your morning routine hence - hop in shower with your toothbrush, brush teeth. Next shower gel/shampoo to clean the unclean bits, then finally, whilst hair is rinsing better, a wet shave. The time in the shower softens the bristle whilst you engage in other grooming, and doing all activities in the shower increases your effective shower time.

        Engineers - can't resist optimising things...

        1. Lord Raa

          Re: I thought hospitals already had this...(@Roq D. Kasba)

          "Get excited and make things better" - Engineers

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: I thought hospitals already had this...

          You forgot to take a piss in the shower....and yes there was campaign to do this a several months back.

          http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-norfolk-29552557

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: I thought hospitals already had this...

            "You forgot to take a piss in the shower."

            That'll make the shower trap smell fragrant, particularly since true tree huggers will be taking short, tepid showers under a flow restricting shower head. Trust the UEA (of Climategate infamy) to come up with such a stupid idea, and the BBC to publicise it.

        3. Philip Stott

          Re: I thought hospitals already had this...

          @Clashman - excellent, thought it was just me optimsing morning ablutions ... don't tell me you pre-heat your tea mug on top of the toaster too?

          1. Roq D. Kasba

            Re: I thought hospitals already had this...

            Tea mug pre-heat, that's good. I don't drink tea at home, nor today that often, otherwise I'd try that.

            A respected former lecturer once described engineering as 'Approximate physics for profit', which I thought was rather good, too.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How well does it mix with...

    Chocolate?

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