Re: Although a fairly accurate and amusing portrayal of LHR security...
Is it really? Or is the real problem a theatre of security that adds very little actual protection buy degrades every traveller (with every native tongue, with many infrequent flyers) with ever-variable and inconsistent rules? Toothpaste? Is it a cream or liquid? The sign doesn't ask for pastes, and it contains very little liquid, less than an apple - so what's the water percentage threshold?
For instance, in the Middle East they were quiet happy for me to take 2 bottles of water as hand luggage to fly to London. Some places want to see your laptop unpacked, in its own tray, some even see it turned on (unlucky if you've got a crappy battery), yet other airports don't. Some want shoes off for everyone, others don't. It's highly inconsistent, and the first time most people find the particular combination of socks, shoes, pants, belt, jewellery, coins, keys, phones, water, toothpaste, laptop open/closed/powered, etc is tired, stressed, and being humiliated in a factory farming dehumanisation programme.
By the way, I've now landed in London with my water and some and toothpaste - lucky I didn't detonate over the city, eh? It's a pantomime of actions that look like diligence, complex rituals to appease the security gods - don't blame the poor fuckers caught up in it.