Hire a Brit
If they hire a Brit (by mistake) then the whole world will be baffled by a tide of irony and innuendo.
A witty writer is being sought to make Apple's voice-activated personal assistant software Siri spout super-scintillating backchat. The chatty iOS app, which attempts to answer any questions and obey commands spoken into Cupertino's latest iThings, is famous for its whimsical responses to fanbois. Siri screenshots, screengrab …
Americans do understand spelling, they have dictionaries and everything. Unfortunately for them, we changed quite a few spellings since the split to make them more trendy and European so now there are lots of people who mistakenly think Americans changed the spellings to make them easier. Even worse, in this Internet generation most can't be bothered to check the history because it's easier to assume the dumb yanks did it.
Noah Webster farted around with the language because he realised most Americans were too stupid to learn how to spell. He made a royal mess of it which introduced much more confusion and stupidity than it could ever have hoped to solve.
I understand that there is now a blow up sex toy with an iDevice connector, though it is only for the 30 pin lead.
Siri would be most useful if she were programmed to talk dirty during a passionate plastic embrace.
Unfortunately when under pressure she tends to reply with the words 'checking my sources' then 'ok here you go'.
- I'd vote for Stephen Fry to add that uniquely british blend of irony, innuendo, sarcasm and self-deprecating humour (plus he's a huge Apple Fanboi).
Alternately, an American wit could have some *canned-laughter* (the mainstay of most US comedy) appended to the end of every response - so we know when to laugh.
... like the cast of the Carol Burnett show.
Or maybe Stephen Moore:
"Find me a restaurant."
"Find you a restaurant? You want me to find you a restaurant? It's not like I eat or anything. Should I find you one like the last time, or do you want to give your cardiologist a rest? No matter, you won't like what I suggest. Did you get that new cover I suggested? No, and now I have this terrible scratch all down my right side..."
But computer generation of viable dialogue is still a research topic.
So I guess it's less about "writing" dialogue as setting various weightings on random variable and identifying which ones define someone's vocal "personality"
If done properly this is not quite as simple as it sounds.
> I wish we could change the voice in the UK, I don't want the male lottery voice talking to me,
> I want that American girl (even though I am a Brit).
>Why can't we choose which voice Siri uses?
You can. Just go into Settings -> General -> Siri -> Language, and change it to English (United States).
When I first got my iPad, Siri defaulted to the Male lottery voice too since I set the tablet up for UK English. Changing the language for Siri lets her speak American English and reverts her to the female voice even though the rest of the tablet still works in British English. Though, the recognition accuracy would then be debatable.
Witty responses my ass. I would be more impressed if I could get the bloody thing to ring my brother to let him know I was just leaving now and would be there in five or ten minutes. After persisting on one or two occasions my eventual phone call has consisted of "I'm just pulling into your street now". Needless to say I have given up trying and have now chosen the option of "click, slide, select, scroll, select & select" which usually takes me the length of time it takes to walk down my path. I know my Belfast accent probably has a lot to do with it, and sometimes I end up getting results speaking in a posh English accent or worse... an American accent, but emmm... no, just ......no.
As someone else
cursed blessed with a "Norn Iron" accent, I've never managed to get Siri to understand me either. Why not do what I do —to let the missus know I'm leaving work and it's time to put the dinner on. Go under:
Settings > General> Keyboard > Shortcuts
...and define a global shortcut. In my case "OMW" expands to "on my way!"
I can text that to the missus in less time than it takes me to walk out of the building.
She gets Monty Python references, as evidenced by what happens if you ask her the airspeed velocity of a swallow, but nada on Blade Runner references. I told her "You look down and see a tortoise. It's crawling toward you. You reach down and you flip the tortoise over on its back, Siri" and she abjectly failed to ask me what a tortoise was OR shoot me.
Oh, wait, maybe I should have asked a Nexus phone?
Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019