back to article Live blog: Facebook's 'screw you' to Google revealed at last

Facebook has called the world's press down to its headquarters in Menlo Park, and El Reg has braved the Death Race 2000 zone that is California's freeway system at commute time to be here. Speculation has been running wild about what the Behoodied One will announce. Theories have included a Facebook smartphone or tablet, an …

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  1. This post has been deleted by its author

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So its basically Google+ with added spyware to track your every movement on FB then.

    Meh.

    1. LarsG
      Meh

      So

      THE PRODUCT IS REALLY YOU!

      Yes YOU are the product.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Now count how many Facebook shares were sold at the peak!

      Ho Hum

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I get it I really do....

      Now I can search for people who have an interest in Anal Vibrators.....

      1. Charlie Clark Silver badge

        Red or blue ones?

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        anal vibrators

        Isn't that what backpage.com is for?

    4. JDX Gold badge
      Mushroom

      Boring

      Not the news, just the inevitable "it's just spyware" comments. FB in particular has the most amazing collection of data available which could be used for absolutely astonishing projects, but you supposed techy experts can't see past them sticking your face next to an advert, and classifying this as some ultra-heinous near-criminal offence.

      1. Mike Flugennock
        FAIL

        Re: Boring

        Not the news, just the inevitable "it's just spyware" comments. FB in particular has the most amazing collection of data available which could be used for absolutely astonishing projects...

        ...yeah, like surveilling dissidents, or just pestering the shit out of people with advertising.

        Shill much?

        1. Dave 126 Silver badge

          Re: Boring

          JDX wasn't shilling, he was being imaginative. If there wasn't the fear of data abuse, then much is possible. However, to foster the trust in the system that is needed for more edifying projects (see Arab Spring, car sharing, study of epidemiology etc) would require a different funding system and users owning the company. Its too late for that now.

          Zuckerberg has talked of a post-privacy society, which rightly puts people off. Unfortunately, it doesn't put enough people off for a peer-to-peer based, user-respecting alternative to arise.

          It is sad that a system that is becoming a de facto means of political engagement is funded on ambitions of flogging personal data to entities who try to nudge our decisions.

          (Facebook as it stands bugs me, and I rarely log on - party invites etc are forwarded to my inbox).

  3. NoneSuch Silver badge
    Devil

    Stock Price

    Was $30.64 at opening this morning in anticipation of the announcement. It is now falling back down since the press conference. Says it all really.

  4. Cubical Drone
    WTF?

    Sounds like just a big round of buzz word bingo

  5. Foxhill
    Thumb Down

    But beyond finding people, no-one uses the search function on Facebook anyway. There is no need. You can poke around their profiles to find the Bikini pics already.

  6. Zaphod.Beeblebrox
    Meh

    ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz

    Wake me when it's over...

  7. Piloti
    WTF?

    So that's it.....

    A search tool.

    Really?

    NOw, if it were a 'phone or an OS, that would be news, but more f%#^ing search, Nahhhhh

    Oh, just remembered, I don't use Facebook so I don't even know why I'm reading this.......

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: So that's it.....

      They'll keep the phone announcement for the next time when they need to flog stock. Personally, I think anyone who holds FB stock after this spike deserves the risk..

  8. Bob Vistakin
    IT Angle

    Yawn

    Come to think of it, why is there no "yawn" icon?

    1. Petrea Mitchell
      Meh

      Re: Yawn

      Isn't that what this here "Meh" icon is for?

      1. Dave 126 Silver badge

        Re: Yawn

        I though the done thing thing when encountering a boring article was to move on to the next one without leaving a comment.

  9. Petrea Mitchell
    Stop

    I have doubts about its usefulness to me

    "Graph search is different from web search in that it doesn't link to the answer to a search, it just gives it, he claims."

    So, to improve on the dodgy information you can find with any Web search, they'll offer dodgy information with no way to figure out the source. Uh, great!

    (What really bothers me, actually, is realizing that most people won't mind not knowing the provenance of their answer.)

    "Results are ranked based on how important the person is to you."

    I dunno about that. I mean, Sir Isaac Newton is important to me, for instance, but I bet they won't find him in my social graph.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I have doubts about its usefulness to me

      I have doubts about whether they'll be able to stop people gaming it. How long before everything links ultimately to picture of a cat?

      1. Petrea Mitchell
        Go

        Re: I have doubts about its usefulness to me

        I don't know, but personally that *would* make it useful to me!

      2. JDX Gold badge

        Re: I have doubts about its usefulness to me

        Since presumably users tell FB how valuable data is TO THEM PERSONALLY, it depends on the data you give it.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I tried the demo...

    ... it told me which of my friends lived in the same town as me,, plus one single friend of a friend which I knew about...

    Totally unimpressive... but then again I'm not one of the sad bastards with 1000s of facebook "friends"

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: I tried the demo...

      No you're one of the sad bastards with hardly any friends in real or virtual life?

  11. jake Silver badge

    Isn't there a law against ...

    ... facilitating stalkers? If there isn't, there should be. Aiding & abetting is the same as doing the crime itself 'round these here parts last time I checked ... And yes, I'm in the very same California that facebook is in.

    1. Dave 126 Silver badge

      Re: Isn't there a law against ...

      >Isn't there a law against ...... facilitating stalkers?

      Taking that argument, phone directories would be outlawed, as would shrubbery in residential areas, and for that matter, roads.

      Jake, I find Facebook's history of not respecting privacy as distasteful as I'm sure you do, but your rhetoric needs a little refinement!

      1. jake Silver badge

        Re: Isn't there a law against ...

        "Taking that argument, phone directories would be outlawed, as would shrubbery in residential areas, and for that matter, roads."

        So you, Dave 126, personally, can completely maintain the entire content of a telephone directory in your mind, and cross-reference that data with local shrubbery & footpaths/roads?

        Think a little, would you ...

    2. auburnman

      Re: Isn't there a law against ...

      That's probably why Zuck's suddenly got a stiffy for privacy with the repeated emphasis on only searching stuff that is publicly viewable. Although how long that'll last before someone pulls some supposedly private stuff through hacking/social engineering/incompetent security is anyone's guess.

  12. Pat 11

    How do people find time for all the admin?

    Does anyone really keep their profile accurate and up to date, and manage all those privacy settings? It sounds like boring admin to me.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How do people find time for all the admin?

      I don't think so. I syced my Facebook list with my phone and all the infomation in there was wrong....

    2. Fred Flintstone Gold badge

      Re: How do people find time for all the admin?

      You're right, it takes me ages to ensure that every bit of data they have about me is wrong.

      This is why tagging pisses me off - I wish I could make myself unavailable for tagging. To compensate, I spent time attaching my profile name (also not real) to about 50 different faces..

      1. JDX Gold badge

        Re: How do people find time for all the admin?

        Pretty sure stopping your tags showing up is trivial... people can tag you but you have to confirm it.

    3. Mike Flugennock

      Re: How do people find time for all the admin?

      Welll-llll...

      I have a FB account, but under a fake name, with a fake birthday, fake birthplace, fake city of residence, no workplace or education listed, and no list of favorite TV shows/movies/books/music. I post only copies of the cartoons I publish, and no fotos. I visit FB maybe once a week -- if that often -- and for about twenty minutes, tops -- if that long. My privacy settings are locked down tighter than a prima donna's corset, and I quickly got into the habit of checking them every time I visit FB.

      So, basically, I spend zero time keeping my profile "accurate" and "updated", and maybe fifteen minutes checking to see if my privacy settings haven't been jerked around.

  13. Blofeld's Cat
    FAIL

    Unlike...

    So we have an "announcement" of "work in progress" for a product still in "pre-beta" (alpha?), which won't be rolled out widely for at least a year, if at all.

    They also don't know how to index all the data yet, or turn it into a business.

    Sounds another sure-fire winner to me.

    1. Charlie Clark Silver badge
      Holmes

      Re: Unlike...

      It is all a bit surreal, isn't it. Kind of hard to remember that this not in Zuck's dad's garage but in the offices of a company that went public for $ 100 bn. And, as I know that both your banks and mine sunk money into that IPO I'm not feeling particularly superior.

  14. mhoulden
    Meh

    Could we arrange for everything Mark Zuckerberg has posted to be as publicly available as he wants everyone else to be? Sauce for the goose, etc.

    1. Mike Flugennock

      re: "sauce for the goose"

      Could we arrange for everything Mark Zuckerberg has posted to be as publicly available as he wants everyone else to be? Sauce for the goose, etc...

      Y'know, I'd be surprised if Anonymous weren't already working on that.

  15. arrbee
    Big Brother

    Firstly...

    So the first thing to do with this is to get a list of all the photos in which you've been tagged and remove said tag ( ok, not first thing, more like thing to do once a week ).

    No, the first thing to do is to ensure all your (correct) personal info is either private to yourself or visible to 'real' friends only, i.e. not to friends of friends or to 'likers' or 'likees'.

    No, the first thing to do is to check if the search restrictions are real, e.g. contractual, or are just by convention, i.e. may vary depending on a user's financial or legal status. Could give a whole new meaning to "guilt by association".

    Incidentally, is there any word on whether the search queries themselves will be stored for future use ?

    1. Piloti
      Meh

      Re: Firstly...

      No, the first thing to do is to close down your FB account if you have one........

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Firstly...

      I imagine searches will show up in the activity log.

    3. JDX Gold badge

      Re: Firstly...

      If you're not going to use FB properly then I agree, why have an account? Just so you can complain about it?

      1. Dave 126 Silver badge

        Re: Firstly...

        >If you're not going to use FB properly then I agree, why have an account? Just so you can complain about it?

        There is some useful functionality in Facebook, but mission creep in search of profit seems inevitable. I would agree that some more positive criticism here would be better than just bashing FB, but the place organise a critical mass of people would be on Facebook itself, such as:

        http://www.europe-v-facebook.org/EN/Objectives/objectives.html

        It Facebook can be made to behave, it does clear the way for people to use it to help organise themselves- be it politically, socially, logistically or whatever.

  16. SB
    WTF?

    Another massive company finds itself with loads of cash and customers

    And not really sure how to expand.

    Google (search and email) and facebook (social network), both great at what they do - but not much else.

    This must be one of the biggest non-event in tech, you will in the future be able search facebook and find someone who posted a picture tagged with india ... how is that news ?

    select user_id from users where picture_tag = "india"

  17. FSM

    How bad can it be?

    "Over 3 per cent of Facebook's CPU time is spent on sorting out privacy, Zuckerberg says."

    I lol'd. Not sure if that's a lot or not.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: How bad can it be?

      "Over 3 per cent of Facebook's CPU time is spent on sorting out privacy, Zuckerberg says."

      "And that is 3% too much" He muttered forgetting his microphone was live

      1. Rob Moir

        Re: How bad can it be?

        I suppose we're supposed to be impressed but surely all this means is that their privacy policy is so byzantine that even their own systems struggle to support it, and it should therefore be simplified.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Fcuk the NWO

  19. Steve Aubrey

    Stocky is stalky?

    Who woulda thunk??

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm not sure I understand who would search for what (advertisers searching for round people to sell them ab workout machines?) and why anyone would want any of their stuff searchable by anyone other than their friends.

    Well done to facebook for creating a lot of hot air about a non-product.

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