back to article Microsoft burgled, only the APPLE iPADS stolen - cops confirm

A savvy sneak slipped into a Microsoft campus, stole five iPads and left all the Microsoft products untouched, according to cops. More than $3,000 in Apple kit was nicked from the research and development complex in Mountain View, California, over Christmas. There was no sign of a forced entry at Building 5 on La Avenida …

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  1. Joefish
    Trollface

    "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

    Well there's your problem, right there. Should have called it an open specification...

    1. LarsG
      Meh

      Apparently

      Apparently according to the news broadcast they found a significant number of additional surface tablets that were unclaimed by staff but linked by serial number to a theft from a Microsoft Store two weeks ago. Police speculate they were left behind by the burglars.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Apparently

        Of course what hasn't yet been reported is that they were all thrown in the bin as the cleaner correctly identified them as being rubbish.

    2. Bob Vistakin
      Linux

      Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

      Look at these two ugly bastards:

      http://bgr.com/2013/01/07/nokia-ceo-elop-interview-android-284778/

      Between them is a pair of loser CEOs.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

        Oh and Eric Schmidt is a wonderful guy is he?

        He used to work for shit boring Novell. He's in North Korea, one of the axes of evil. He only gives a shit about grabbing your money and couldn't give a stuff about paying taxes.

        Elop is a good CEO, many Nokia users who have written to him with problems have received free gifts and help. Try emailing Schmidt, would probably be out playing golf or something. Steve Jobs would have said "hold it differently".

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          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

            Nokia Sold 134 million Symbian handsets per year; that was 34 million more than the year before. So they saw 34% growth which is great for a mature product. Elop burns the Symbian platform and up until recently, was still outselling WP. Now Nokia is looking at 12 million handsets a year for sales; not even 10% of where they were. Elop is a terrible CEO. If he really wanted to go to WP shouldn't he of waited until WP8 was out? ALl they did was burn their Symbian customer base and then again with WP7 not seeing WP8 and can't run WP8 apps. It also doesn't help that you can't get the latest SDK from MS unless you produced apps for WP7. Not a way to encourage developers to develop for your platform.

            If Symbian was a burning platform, what was and still is WP? WP is more successful than Kin, but look not by much. Look at where Kin is right now. Look at where WP and Windows RT are headed?

          2. Piro

            Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

            Oh, I don't know, he can hang out with Léo Apotheker - he's an idiot who slashed the value of HP and threw WebOS in the trash, when with a bit more love and some better hardware design could be a great platform.

          3. dajames Silver badge
            Paris Hilton

            Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

            Elop is the worst CEO of all time.

            Oh, no. He went over to Nokia to enslave it to the beast, and has done that very well. The man may be evil, but he's not incompetent. Not the worst CEO of all time, just the worst man Nokia could have appointed as CEO.

            There have been several other stunningly bad CEOs in recent time ... I could perhaps mention a former head of HP as an example (it's not libellous if it's true, right?) ...

            Paris, 'cos she'd do it better!

          4. kb
            Facepalm

            Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

            Oh lord can we end that lie already? Nokia was big in DUMBPHONES which anybody could see was like being the number 1 maker of 8-tracks in 1983, really not a good place to be. they had not one, not two, but THREE internal OSes, all were in various stages of broken and were in no shape to compete with iPhone (and don't even say MeeGo, their dev team admitted it would be a year and a half minimum before it was up to snuff and there are several guys that worked on it that said it had fatal memory and networking issues) so what EXACTLY did people expect him to do? Close the doors and give the money back to the shareholders?

            Nobody has made money on Android but Google and Samsung, even HTC is no seriously hurting because Android is in a free fall race to the bottom. heck you can go in any Walmart here in the states and get an Android smartphone with no contract for $70 USD. There is just no money left in Android for any company that doesn't outsource all their hardware to China, Nokia didn't have the money to get into a bidding war with HP over WebOS (which IMHO would have been the best bet) and Apple certainly isn't gonna license iOS, so that left them only THREE, count 'em three choices...either give up on the smartphone market for at least a year and a half (probably more like 2 and a half if the insiders are correct) with NOTHING to sell but bottom of the line dumbphones running Symbian until then, get completely slaughtered jumping into the sharktank that is Android, or go with WinPhone where MSFT would pay for all the adverts and engineering so all they had to do was make hardware, heck they even got the cost of every license back in advertising dollars.

            In hindsight was it a bad call? yes but I would argue there wasn't any other call Elop could make, short of selling off the company piecemeal like a corporate raider. The dumbphone is dead, it made them good money in the past but even the third world is getting cheap droid phones now so its just a dead end street Symbian was a dumbphone OS that looked like Win 3.x and simply couldn't run a new UI and new apps without a total rewrite, the Java based one they had in house had fatal memory leaks, and MeeGoo had both memory and networking issues that would have required you having to reboot the phone when you wanted to surf...nobody is gonna put up with that today. So it really came down to MSFT or close the doors and I doubt the folks at Nokia would have been happy had he started closing the place down.

            1. Mark .

              Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

              Nokia were the number one smartphone company until 2011, when they were overtaken by Samsung (not Apple). Their flagship Symbian was number one platform until 2011, when overtaken by Android.

              In fact, it even outsold iphone for several months after that, despite the WP announcement, zero marketing, poor or little distribution in many countries, and few new models, and reduced OS development.

              Even now, almost 2 years after the WP announcement, it sells more than iphone did in the first quarters (and so does WP, come to that), despite the latter getting vast amounts of media hype, and Symbian getting none.

              Nokia still outsell Apple in the mobile market (though are overtaken by Samsung) - even their S40 platform isn't a dumbphone, and although it hasn't been marketed as "smart" (except for the new recent Asha Touch smartphone platform), it still basically is. Meanwhile, the first iphone was a dumb phone:

              "were in no shape to compete with iPhone"

              My Nokia 5800 did fine against the iphones of the time - the first of which couldn't even do apps or 3G, which my earlier 2005 feature phone could.

              Note, I'm not taking any position on the WP decision, but your comments about Nokia are just plain wrong.

        2. asdf Silver badge
          FAIL

          Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

          >Oh and Eric Schmidt is a wonderful guy is he?

          Hmm so everybody who criticizes Microsoft or their ho hum me too products is now automatically an Android or Apple fanboi eh? Not everyone believes in corporate tribes (most outside of middle school in fact). Some of us just look at electronics as tools and select the one that best meets our needs for the right price.

        3. Cyclist
          Headmaster

          Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

          Point of order, but it's axis of evil, not axes. Axes of evil is a whole new ball game.

          Carry on.

      2. Herer
        Thumb Up

        Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

        that isn't ballmer's real hand

      3. Atonnis

        Re: "Microsoft did not respond to a request for comment".

        I don't quite think you can really call those two 'loser CEOs' - both of their bank balances are probably more than you'll earn over your entire lifetime.

  2. Thomas 4

    And many thanks

    ...to Mr T. Cook for the news tip.

    1. Mark .

      Re: And many thanks

      Indeed, this is nothing more than a troll / press release masquerading as news - people may dislike MS, but seriously, you want to advertise for let's-destroy-the-most-successful-Open-Source-operating-system-with-software-patents Apple?

      If they only took five items, it seems clear it was a targeted theft. And as noted in the other recent story[*], this may be because they're expensive, and there will be a minority who will pay any price for them, plus unlike many makes, they only do expensive products, so it's an easier target.

      Given that thieves typically steal to sell, this tells us nothing about what is desired, but what people can sell at a high price. So Apple win on that - big deal. And whilst I'm sure the spin is "people don't want MS even for free", the flipside is that it says these people are only willing to take Apple if they give it for free (also see the ridiculous numbers of "win a free ipad" competitions).

      The other point is that these stories only get reported when it favours Apple.

      [*] What is it about all these recent "Thieves stealing Apple products" stories? Seems some kind of desperate marketing attempt to make the products look popular. Even the local news here was at it, reporting on burglaries, but then mentioning only Apple brand names by name - any other makes just get ignored, or don't get reported.

  3. mhoneywell

    BYOD

    Good to see Microsoft supporting the principles it touts.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: BYOD

      Should be TYoD

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    They Looked At The W8 Machines....

    And thought WTF is that GUI all about, no thanks.

    1. This post has been deleted by a moderator

    2. Mark .

      Re: They Looked At The W8 Machines....

      Except if that was their view, they wouldn't have then taken a tablet-only ipads!

  5. Dana W
    Happy

    This is going to leave me amused all day.

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge

      Yep, me too. And it makes me wonder: were these thieves out for profit, or did they really want to salt into some people's wounds.

      1. Thorne
        Gimp

        Actually it's like the animal liberationists who break into labs to free lab animals. Fanbois broke in and liberated the iPads to stop evil Microsoft scientist performing unholy experiments on them.

        Unfortuantely like in the horror movies these iPads are already infected and will wreak havok on the fanboi population.

        Muhahahahahaha

  6. JimmyPage Silver badge
    Happy

    Priceless

    Many years ago, a company I worked for had offices in a really out-of-town (nearest store 1mile) technology park.

    One day we had a frantic phone call from the office manager. Thieves had broken into our offices, and then used our computers to break the windows into the office across the hall, and steal their computers.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What were Microsoft stealing from the iPads?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "What were Microsoft stealing from the iPads?"

      Nothing, they just thought it was cool to be seen with one !

      1. Naughtyhorse

        Nothing, they just thought it was cool to be seen with one !

        So the gear belonged to the team that brought us windoze ME then

      2. Matt Bryant Silver badge
        Facepalm

        Re: Nothing, they just thought it was cool to be seen with one !

        If you read the article;

        "....Microsoft reported the crime to the police on 2 January but believes the electronics were stolen between 19 and 26 December....."

        Looks like the iPads weren't that cool seeing as no-one noticed they had gone for up to fourteen days.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Nothing, they just thought it was cool to be seen with one !

          Microsoft has some evidence as to when the crime occurred and someone sat on it at the request of the PR department. They needed to come up with a story to which they couldn't think of one. I think the thieves should have left a Zune behind.

          I heard Ballmer felt so bad, that he offered a new Surface to replace the four iPads that got stolen.

        2. Alex King
          FAIL

          Re: Nothing, they just thought it was cool to be seen with one !

          OR, the office where they were might have been unattended during that period. Now let me see, what could possibly have caused that around that time of year??

        3. hplasm Silver badge
          Devil

          Re: Nothing, they just thought it was cool to be seen with one !

          They noticed they had gone, but thought they might come back after a reboot.

    2. Field Marshal Von Krakenfart
      Trollface

      What were Microsoft stealing from the iPads?

      Nothing, The were checking to see what crApple had stolen from them.

      ref: "We have always been shameless about stealing great ideas" — Steve Jobs, Triumph of the Nerds, 1996 (youtube link)

  8. Scarborough Dave
    Coffee/keyboard

    Nice article to read before I went home

    Thanks! needed a chuckle after the Monday blues!

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    That's what you get

    if you don't watch MS Windows8 adds carefully. You end up with the wrong kit.

  10. Andy Fletcher

    If he got some untested MS apps for Mac devices...

    He's probably already suffered enough punishment.

  11. Big_Ted
    Trollface

    If I had broken in

    I would have taken the Apple kit as well, easy to sale on ebay for a good price.

    After all 5 ipads among hundreds won't stand out but a couple of surface tablets on ebay would be a red flag to anyone, after all they only sold half a dozen or so,

    1. Grave

      Re: If I had broken in

      probably easier because crapple users aren't the brightest bulbs in a box so they pretty much buy even clay-brick with crapple logo on it

      //code cipher:

      downvote = agreed

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: If I had broken in

        You mean like this?

    2. ElReg!comments!Pierre Silver badge

      Re: If I had broken in

      It's all about price. Apple kit sells at several thousand times the manufacturing price, hence a lot of room for stolen half-price kit on the black market: cheap enough to be a good buy despite the risk. Ignoring the surface for this argument, you can buy or build a windows computer for, well, the price of its part on the Chinese market. 400 bucks will get you a very decent windows office machine. factoring in the labour cost of physically removing the machines from MS headquarters, you can't possibly beat that. A basic Windows PC is cheaper to buy than to steal. Then there is value-to-volume and weight: ratios: the thieves could have stolen one full-size rack of spanking new servers, used heavy machinery to move it to a rather large van. Instead they choose to steal the same resale-value kit that fits in a briefcase.

      Also, reselling beasty servers is harder and more suspicious than reselling "Oh I got it for Xmas but I don't like it that much" iPads...

      1. Dana W
        FAIL

        Re: If I had broken in

        "Apple kit sells at several thousand times the manufacturing price,"

        No.

        1. ElReg!comments!Pierre Silver badge

          Re: If I had broken in

          > "Apple kit sells at several thousand times the manufacturing price,"

          > No.

          You're right. It's only twice the retail price (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/02/11/ipad_breakdown/)

          heh.

          1. Dana W
            Happy

            Re: If I had broken in

            I never denied THAT. Just that "several thousand times" is just dumb. Note the thumbs down from the Fandroids and the Winsheep.

            1. dajames Silver badge
              FAIL

              Re: If I had broken in

              I never denied THAT. Just that "several thousand times" is just dumb. Note the thumbs down from the Fandroids and the Winsheep.

              Nah, you're getting voted down because you're coming across as someone who is so literal-minded that he can't appreciate the use of ironic exaggeration to emphasize a point.

              1. Anonymous Coward
                Anonymous Coward

                Re: If I had broken in

                Look I've told you a million times not to exaggerate.

            2. ElReg!comments!Pierre Silver badge
              Unhappy

              Re: If I had broken in @ Dana W

              > the Fandroids and the Winsheep.

              just for the record, I mildly hate MSWindows (my work involves tech support for MSWinLusers... so I'm paid for MS' flaws, in a way; hence the "mildly"). I never ever owned an iOS device but I still have to fix these for friends; and I never ever owned an Android device, or had to fix one. My real machines mostly run Debian or OpenBSD, and my toys (handhelds, etc) run either obscure Linux distros (for the most powerful ones) or fully machine-programmed OSes (for the more ressource-limited ones). Excluding my work machines, I do not use any internal hard drive larger than 20 GB. I am a sad geek indeed.

    3. Mark .

      Re: If I had broken in

      And Apple ipads, the most overhyped product in existence even before its release, took years to get anywhere (it was 6 months before I saw a single one). And the original iphone only sold half a dozen (see? I can make stuff up too - or more accurately, they sold way less than Symbian, Blackberry, and even WM).

      Seriously - I get that people here don't like tablets and MS, yet then you find they support *Apple*?

      You're right on the first paragraph, which is why this pro-Apple-spin is a non-story.

  12. Silverburn
    Happy

    Santa

    Microsoft reported the crime to the police on 2 January but believes the electronics were stolen between 19 and 26 December

    Hmmmm. Looks like nobody is immune to Apples supply management - not even Santa. No sign of forced entry, but did the room have a chimney by any chance...?

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