Re: Seriously though...
"See how fast you get workable, commercially-viable, clean vehicles and power when you hit companies in their bottom lines"
At the moment energy companies already pay an effective negative tax (due to subsidies) on "renewables". As these build out, the marginal economics of the thermal plant are altering, such that (in Germany, and Southern Italy for example) a lot of thermal plant is already unprofitable to run through much of the year. The German government are threatening the energy companies with new laws because the companies WANT to turn off some of the thermal plant and the German government don't want them to. Electric cars attract considerable subsidies, but remain eco-bling for the well off, without materially reducing the cost of such vehicles, in the same way that London congestion charge exemptions merely enable the rich to save money that the peasants have to stump up. A further check on your optmism in market interference is the example of subsidies for low energy light bulbs. These subsidies were removed a year or so back, and the cost of the things has bounced back up to the level it was before the subsidy started. The UK government is gormlessly looking at increase UK electricity costs next year by around 20% with their carbon floor tax, which I assume you'll heartily approve of, along with an escalator for future years. Sadly this will simply go onto your bill, thanks to the religious conviction of politicians in climate change, although note this effects the electricity industry - there's no carbon tax on gas burnt at home, showing how inept government thinking is. Be sure that more British manufacturing will move elsewhere as a result.
The root cause is not evil energy companies - they do what makes money, which is what business does and should do. The root cause is that the UK consumes 212 Million Tonnes of Oil Equivalent (ie from all sources) of energy each year, and that renewables can't produce any worthwhile fraction of that. In terms of what can be done, the most advantageous course is not to criminalise fossil fuels and beggar the country, but to minimise the 65 MTOE of losses, and the circa 10 MTOE of avoidable (with existing measures and technology) end use heating losses.
If I might suggest, a few facts would help you out, and they are here. First of all the DECC energy flow chart, a fantastic resource:http://www.decc.gov.uk/assets/decc/11/stats/publications/flow-chart/5939-energy-flow-chart-2011.pdf
And second, I don't fully agree with the underlying ethos and some of the solutions, but this next one is a fantastic attempt to crunch the numbers on going for renewables big time: http://www.withouthotair.com/