There is no snail.
Errr yeah. I got nothin'.
A team of scientists have successfully implanted a bioelectronic fuel cell into a living organism and used its blood sugar to charge a battery. The team from Potsdam, New York's Clarkson University (thankfully nothing to do with Top Gear) implanted a fuel cell that runs off glucose that is naturally produced by the snail, and …
Errr yeah. I got nothin'.
Something about using them to power an electric car and painting a big 'S' logo on the bonnet, roof and doors...
No, you're right. Dead in the water.
Yay, look at that S car go!
But seriously - you need 6 million snails to generate 1 watt of continuous output? What's the input power in terms of lettuces per hour?
a lettuce lattice for your snail matrix? Surely they would be fed by some liquid/paste nutrient suppliment
The snails have been found to be breeding like wildfire surrounding nuclear fission power plants, the newly mutated strain can generate a highly effective taser effect.
While they are doing a fantastic job of keeping the nut jobs trying to steal fissile material away from the installations, they are also eating them.
The largest examples are currently 1m in length and unfortunately, posing a problem for the military as they appear to be able to generate a sufficient magnetic field and control it with such dexterity that they are able to deflect conventional military rifle ammunition.
Tanks are currently being brought in to attempt to deal with the problem.
Sharks! With lasers! And a cristal tank - so they can shoot the snails!
Epic battle! YAY!
Anyone considered just salting them? Or perhaps using a salt bullet? Last I checked, sodium chloride is nonferrous and can't be affected (at least readily) by magnetism.
Just tried powering my cell phone with one. Now I need a new phone and a new snail.
Are you sure that you were holding it properly?
If they can get past the problem of doing this in animals which use hemoglobin, then humans can have our own fuel cells inserted. I like the idea of being my own phone charger, and there must be many other applications. We will become true cyborgs! As an added bonus, the more electricity we use, the more calories we'll burn, so we'll be wired and svelte.
You are Kevin Warwick and ICMFP!
"the more electricity we use, the more calories we'll burn"
Damn, I want to play Angry Birds, but my phone's out of charge, someone get me a burger now!
Does this mean we could make a power plant out of hyperglycemic diabetics?
Or, could this be a new treatment for diabetes?
"My phone battery is low, I'll just attach it to my arm and eat a mars bar. Don't worry about the shakes, they'll subside."
And should be extractable *without* conversion to Meth or Ethanol.
May be the start of something big..
"Well sugar is found in lots of plants as well."
Sugar Cane for example.
Come back to me when Apple is powering a data-centre from 10 hectares of snails.
Well they come with rounded corners already, so we're halfway there.
Really? Apple makes data centers? You're kidding right?
going well on Shell!
So in the future everyone carries a few snails in there pockets to charge mobiles etc... Does that mean we will also have to put up with those snail trails that look an awefully lot like gizz stains?
I think I'll stick to charging at home... Boom, BOOM!
I'd suggest a single African snail for laptop power and maybe snail clusters for mobes.
But, as with batteries, do these snails get hot with use ?
Placed together in a pocket can they achieve critical mass?
If they do then also include some herbs, butter and garlic - the little mobe prodder will double up as a fork.
Don't know about you lot, but for years I've used copper strips to keep snails and slugs off my vegetable patch.
<Charlton Heston>Duracells are snails! damn you, you maniacs!!!!</Charlton Heston>
Duracell are made from rabbits as ane fule no.
If you're going to do something that could conceivably piss off another creature, always pick one that you can outrun.
My taste includes both snails and oysters.
Then again, maybe they have, and no-one noticed.
I'm sure the police could walk and still get there in time.
The machines will take over and use us as a power source and only keeanu reeves can save us...
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