back to article Erotica 2011 stands firm against rise of the sex machines

It may not have been overtaken by machines just yet, but reports of the demise of Erotica may be just a bit premature. An official spokesman for what is widely billed as the UK's premier adult event confirmed this weekend that London's Olympia had already been re-booked for next year and, despite detractors, Erotica was looking …

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  1. TRT Silver badge
    WTF?

    Seriously?

    An erotic alarm cock?

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    A bit ... ahem ... lame

    I stopped going to Erotica some years ago when the seriously inventive stalls started to dissapear in favour of the increasing number of general soft porn pushers. I don't recall reading the name Fetters in your report. Have they returned?

    1. jason 7
      Meh

      Yeah its not the same anymore.

      I went to the first three of the Erotica shows and whilst the first one was a bit rough the second and third were really good. I then didn't go for a couple of years then went to one around 2002 and it wasn't the same. Not the same buzz and far more porn sellers.

      Dread to think what it's like now.

      1. Graham Marsden
        Thumb Down

        What it's like now...

        I stopped taking a stall at Erotica back in 2003 and I've never regretted it.

        The organisers are simply interested in how much money they can get from stall holders and punters and they long ago priced almost all the niche suppliers out of exhibiting. Now what you have is a cross between a glorified Ann Summers shop and totally irrelevant stalls eg tooth-whitening products made an appearance again!

        Oh and next year's show is going to be held in the smaller National Hall instead of Olympia 2 because there are simply no longer enough people willing to pay the exhorbitant prices that Erotica are asking and the owners of Olympia won't let them make the aisles any larger. (If you went up to the gallery level and looked down you could see huge areas of empty carpet which, in long-ago years would have been filled with stalls).

  3. IglooDude

    "Being a dominatrix is, er, an acquired skill?"

    Certainly. A fair bit of psychology, varying amounts of physical technique, and throw in some theater as well.

    1. Graham Marsden
      Boffin

      Re: "Being a dominatrix is, er, an acquired skill?"

      Most definitely. Regrettably, due to the influence of bad films, bad TV and bad fiction, many "working ladies" seem to have the idea that all you need to do is put on a corset and a pair of thigh boots and stamp around shouting and hitting someone with a whip.

      The actual professional ladies (many of whom are customers of mine!) deride these people for their lack of competence and also for them bringing the whole idea of Safe, Sane and Consensual Domination into disrepute.

  4. Chris007
    Paris Hilton

    NSFW?

    I'm sure I've seen worse pictures on articles not labelled as NFSW over the years!

    1. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: NSFW?

      It's just a kind act of politeness - in case your employer can read over your shoulder as well as observe any porny pictures.

      C.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Whoops

        I seriously mis-read your username!

        1. Thomas 4

          You

          ...weren't the only one...

      2. Tim Jenkins
        Coat

        Neigh Safe For Work

        Am I the only one who read that as 'pony pictures'?

  5. Lord Lien
    Coat

    The 'interactive' flashlight...

    ... does that man look like Arnold J Rimmer or what?

  6. Arbuthnot Darjeeling

    I trust

    there won't be any pained commentards questioning why this story is in a journal for IT workers?

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "seems to grow yearly more deafening"

    I find that in nightclubs. It's very strange...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      the music gets louder

      because the "players" are getting older and losing their hearing.

      the younger generation typically doesn't need a scheduled event in a physical place to discuss their fetishes. there's 4chan for that :P

      Plus, like the nightclub set, those that go are often there as attention whores, going to be "seen" or to gain some sort of "legitimacy" that they feel they need by making their presence known or bragging about having been present.

      the rest of us, well, would rather actually be "doing" said activities with our willing partners instead of seeing booths about what we could've been doing if we actually had willing partners to do them with...:P

  8. CowardlyAndrew
    Gimp

    Apparently it is the post show parties in local hotels where the fun is to be had, so I am told.

  9. The Flying Dutchman

    No "anatomically correct" ...

    ... android robots yet?

  10. raving angry loony
    WTF?

    lack of imagination

    quote "...and Shawbury Vintners – "importers of fine wines". No doubt these all deliver quality product: but erotic? We think not."

    The author obviously lacks imagination if she things that fine wines can't be erotic. I mean, really, try to think outside the convent here.

    1. BorkedAgain

      And there was me assuming that the "other" exhibitors had simply hit upon an ingenious excuse for attending...

      "Sorry honey, I can't make your mother's birthday. Work needs me to go to this conference thingie..."

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sad that the mains powered vibrator has been (erm) withdrawn

    Plugging into the mains supply means you could (tenuously perhap) claim it as wind-, coal-, or nuclear-powered, depending on your politics.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Am I the only one...

    that found the youtube clip somewhat, (read massively), creepy?

    1. Francis Boyle Silver badge

      Hey

      The guy was wearing a white coat so it's all legit.

  13. Mr Grumblefish
    Coat

    Of course,

    Symbian won't provide you with any sexual gratification - that's what iOS is for.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I'm just happy to have added 'teledildonics' to my lexicon.

  15. jungle_jim
    Thumb Up

    i got my mrs one of those wands from lovehoney as im away for work in Singapore for a year.

    it freaking mental.

    well worth the £50 odd quid im told!

  16. zen1

    wtf

    I'm curious, is the thing for the guys also fed by AC or is it all USB powered? If not, wtf, why the double standard? And $250 for that? How the hell are you supposed to clean the damn thing? What happens if your laptop is hacked and "the device" winds up assaulting someone? While I won't go into the gory details of how, but what if the laptop shorts out during an arrival, and catches fire? Who's going to explain that one to the next of kin, the police, fire dept or the insurance company?

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    My reaction to the article in one word. . .

    Yuck.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Yeah, I'm with you.

      I also once tried sex, bjech. What people see in it beats me.

  18. illiad

    Mr Grumblefish...

    dont you mean http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sybian :) ??

    .. and yes, used to be a good fun place to go with kinky friends.... :P

    there were actually some good porn stars there then.. Linsey Dawn McKenzie, Lorna Morgan, Kerry Marie... last time only lorna was there, said it was just getting too expensive to get a stand.. :(

    Unless you have a trade pass, its not really worth it now.. a lot cheaper to go to soho or camden... also NO nudity, NO cameras, bloody boring!!

    the European erotica shows are much better, with full nudity, no problems with cameras, or even with touching naked models!!

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Wave of the future, Dude. 100% electronic.

    Uh-huh. Well, I still jerk off manually.

  20. Brian Morrison
    Coat

    Dildroid?

    I can just imagine when you take your Android phone to the service centre and they insist on charging for a repair because the internal moisture indicators have all turned red!

  21. pyroweasel
    Coat

    Maybe the RSPB 'withdrew' because they started using the whole rooster?

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