back to article Zimbabwean claims prostitute turned into donkey

A Zimbabwean man collared having sex with a donkey sensationally claimed the object of his affections was actually a prostitute who mysteriously metamorphosed into a hot piece of ass. According to this report, 28-year-old Sunday Moyo was cuffed after a couple of cops found him making the beast with six legs in his yard in …

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  1. Andyf
    Joke

    Ahem....

    heaw heaw heaw he ought not to have done that.....

    /gets coat.

  2. Flugal

    Sounds reasonable

    If you're prepared to believe 'god' is simultaneously the father, the son, and the holy ghost, then it seems perfectly logical to believe a prostitute can become a donkey.

    I just happen not to.

    1. David Barrett Silver badge

      Actually I find it easier to believe in prozzy -> donkey conversion given that I can observe prozzies and donkeys now and can confirm that both exist, its just the conversion that requires some faith at this stage.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      yes but...

      did he go bareback?

    3. Turtle

      Oh look!

      Oh, look! Another loudmouth atheist looking for, and finding, an occasion to display his smugness. Well isn't he clever.

      1. Ole Juul Silver badge
        Coat

        Occasion

        I don't see how someone who doesn't believe that a prostitute can become a donkey would necessarily be an atheist.

        1. Turtle

          If you go back and read the post, you will see that he *said* that he is an atheist.

    4. perlcat
      Trollface

      Sunday dinner would have to be a hoot with you.

      "Please pass the butter."

      "If you believe that *foo religious concept* is logical, then you're stupid."

      I'd say that you're tiresome, but it _is_ fun to mock you.

  3. Captain TickTock
    Joke

    I've heard something like this before

    Must happen all the time in Zimbabwe.

    They must have prescription beer-goggles...

  4. U4eA
    Coat

    Eehore anyone?

    Mines the one with with the Winnie the Ho in the pocket...

    1. TRT Silver badge

      He might have mistaken it for a zebra who'd stripped out of the stripy pyjamas.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Eehore anyone?

      good! Even very good...

      But not as good as "hot piece of ass," which probably can't be beaten.

      Best Register pun of the year!

      1. perlcat
        Coat

        I dunno

        Sounds to me like another gamer playing another game of "Donkey Schlong".

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Quote of the day...

    "...mysteriously metamorphosed into a hot piece of ass."

    Pure gold.

  6. Naughtyhorse

    he asked her if he could do her in the ass!

    simples!

  7. hexx
    Happy

    should have gone to specsavers

  8. micheal
    Joke

    Prince Charming had a similar experience

    Making love to Cinderella and next thing it's past midnight and he's charged with molesting a pumkin

    1. Suburban Inmate
      Paris Hilton

      Don't knock it 'til you've tried it!

      Just don't make a pie with it.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Wonder if he Donkey Punched?

    Anon....

  10. Eponymous Cowherd
    Coat

    EEE Awww, EEEE Awwww

    EEEE Ought to know better.

  11. Semaj
    Coat

    Playmobil Reconstruction?

  12. theBatman
    Coat

    Maybe that's what they mean by a...

    ... hot piece of ass?

    1. Brian 6
      Thumb Down

      SAD

      Stealing a joke directly from the article. That's clever.

      1. theBatman
        Coat

        Not Guilty

        Doh!

        I plead guilty to the lesser charge of not having read the article properly and shall take my leave... Where's my coat...?

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Quick

    Get that man an iPad!

  14. frank ly Silver badge

    I suggest that he insists on being tried by his peers; ...

    .... i.e. a jury of lonely 28 year old men who live on remote farms.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      There's an app for that?

      Really?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Sorry should have referenced it

        http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/10/27/ipads_in_zimbabwe/

        Two Zimbabwe articles in two days.

    2. Ian Michael Gumby Silver badge
      Coat

      He should have known better.

      That piece of ass was the sheriff's gal.

  15. TRT Silver badge

    It's quite clear...

    The guy was quite clearly instable.

    Is this a case of bolting the horse after the stable door is locked?

  16. T.a.f.T.
    Joke

    Well he paid for ass

    Simple mistake when you have had a few.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    same dam' thing

    happened to my ex-wife

  18. Anonymous Coward 101
    Windows

    Apparently...

    ...the guy also said he was homeless and was looking for stable accommodation.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is Lester Haines the new Victor Lewis Smith

    For those who have read Funny Old World in Private Eye for many years, you may remember a similar story. It concerned East Africa again, and a man in court having been caught in flagrente delicto with a sheep. The sheep being adorned with a bonnet and nappy at the time. In his defence, the man was heard to say, "Six times I go with women and six times I get VD. When will people learn that animals are cleaner, and cheaper."

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Meet my friend

    I guess in meeting Eewhore he must have also met the ass' friend, Winnie the Poo...

  21. Blubster
    Coat

    So....

    That's what they mean by donkey riding?

  22. Marketing Hack Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Thanks for nothing!!!

    I'll never be able to watch Shrek movies again without thinking about what the lonely ogre and his vocal donkey friend are really up to......

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    game on!

    So that's how you play donkey kong

  24. Graham Marsden
    Happy

    There should have been a clue when....

    ... she said her name was Jenny!

  25. Dave 126 Silver badge

    I can't remember if it were in VLS's Funny Old World, or on the Reg that I read about a man being caught whilst intimate with a goat. His local African court - or council of elders- ordered him to marry the animal.

    Seems to be an enlightened justice system with a sense of humour.

    1. json

      .. I heard they lived happily ever after.

  26. Eddie Hotchkiss
    Facepalm

    Little donkey, little donkey

    On a dusty road

    i'll keep on plunging onwards

    With my precious load.

  27. ZimboKraut
    Thumb Up

    ah bass....

    I don't no

    I um not ze wane

    any rhodi will understand.... ;-)

  28. Wombling_Free
    Paris Hilton

    I just love the tag line - sure, why not? Beats work!

    READ MORE Bestiality Zimbabwe Donkey Prostitute Sex

  29. Mips
    Childcatcher

    "examined by two government psychiatrists" ?

    To say nothing about an eyesight test.

  30. Nick Pettefar

    "examined by two government psychiatrists" I wonder what that is a euphemism for? A good beating if he's lucky, torture and death if he's not.

  31. IT MUNKEY

    E aaught to know better!

  32. Inventor of the Marmite Laser Silver badge
    Coat

    Eeeee Awwwwtn't have done it.

    Mines the one with the mashed oats in the pocket.

  33. Jim 59

    Ass

    It's that donkeys fault for being so damn sexy.

  34. sabba
    Mushroom

    She...

    ...wasn't a donkey yer 'onor - she was a drug's mule!!

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