back to article iPad, iPhone driving 'renaissance' in nuclear reactors

The world-renowned Jesus mobe and its new, selectively crippled large version the iPad are well known to be generally the choice of your arty, creative, polo-necked right-on type. An iPhone being used for nuclear reactor design. Credit: U Utah Touchscreen reactor core magic at work. Cruel capitalistic business executives …


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  1. simonckenyon

    i thought this was against apple's T&Cs

    it is a while since i bought an apple computer.

    but i definitely remember that there was one exclsusion in the licence for the mac that i used to own; and that was its use in the nuclear industry - which was forbidden

  2. Eddie Edwards
    Thumb Down

    Very silly

    This is like saying Windows Photo Viewer is driving a renaissance in porn.

  3. DJ 2

    Taliban doing commercial reactor software?

    It seems you also need another piece of software called AGENT (Arbitrary Geometry Neutron Transport), which isn't at the moment commercially available. ®

    *Apart from the Taliban ones, that is.

  4. Thomas 18

    "It's safe and proven technology"

    They hardly ever blow up, 0.2% explosion rate [1,2] is well below statistical significance!



  5. lukewarmdog

    Teh Children!

    "We certainly have to consider the environment for our children," adds Jevremovic.

    Well thank some higher power that someone is FINALLY thinking about the children.

    Let me be the first to welcome our nuclear powered iGods.

    1. Ammaross Danan

      Re: "It's safe and proven technology"

      436 Commercial reactors, and some 250 research reactors and one USSR [read "dodgy"] reactor explodes and you stretch to claim a 0.2% (1/(436+250) == 0.14577%, which makes it even less significant). Anyway, nuclear power has gone a long way since Chernobyl was built in !!1970!!. I'm sure we can't base today's nuclear power prowess on 40-year-old USSR tech. Would be like saying computers have poor performance because my old IBM machine circa 1970 was "slow."


      Granted, nothing has a 100% rate of success, no matter how much a fanboi insists. Even death, "biblically" has failed a few times. ;)

  6. morphoyle

    Apple pushes the entire world up

    Yeah, Apple BS is driving a renaissance in this industry. It has nothing to do with the tons of stimulus money and plans to increase nuclear power production in the US. More Apple hype from Reg. This site is becoming as bad as gizmodo.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Jobs Horns

      And the Gadget Show!

      Don't forget the Gadget Show- if they're not sponsored by Apple already they're missing a trick!

    2. Steven Knox Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      I love it!

      On any given day, you can be assured of forms of the two following comments on this site:

      1. The Register is nothing but an Apple hype-machine!


      2. I'm sick of all of this Apple-bashing on The Register!

  7. Rick Brasche

    color me disappointed

    the article mentions the viewer is free but none of the simulation data is available-so there's no available output. So much for cool simulation stuff on my Ipad Nano.

    Here I was hoping the solution to iPhone battery woes had finally arrived.

  8. Camilla Smythe Silver badge

    Ooooops Bugger

    "Oooooops Bugger. The real one has shat its pants."

    "Cannot be true. We designed it on the iFuck!"

    "Uhm, well looking through the current lack of window, and associated wall, and seeing that nasty looking glowing cloud thing killing everything in its path whilst mutating potatoes and stuff into flesh eating zombies I really do think we have a problem here."

    "Cannot be true. We designed it on the iFuck!"

    "All the skin on your left hand side has just dropped off and your muscles seem to be liquefying."

    "iFucks Out!. Someone e-mail Steve NOW!!! We can save the day!"

    "Yew. Hey I just vomited all my internal organs."

    "Me too."

    "My battery just went flat."

    "I just shat all my internal organs and my battery has gone flat as well."




    1. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      My personal nightmare

      "I just shat all my internal organs and my battery has gone flat as well."

  9. tom 24

    Green power?

    As much as it pains me to heap criticism on this fine article, let us also not forget that nuclear power is currently considered green power (over the alternative, coal, anyway). So, um, that joke didn't really work. Good try though.

    1. Hans 1 Silver badge
      Dead Vulture

      Nuclear energy is green nrg in US and Britain, only

      I think Britain even tried to claim it was renewable energy ... because one can recycle 1% of the waste, ain't that cool?

      Utter non-sense and bullshit, how somebody can defend nuclear energy and mention kids in the same sentence makes me sick!

      It might be considered green energy in Iran and North Korea, too ... who knows ...

      Please, stop this nuclear FUD.

      France is full of it, we have plenty of plants over here and 100km from where I live, they lost 10 Kg in the nature, they found it since ... and claimed there was absolutely no risk for the environment, since Uranium is natural, LOL.

      Greenpeace just recently attempted to stop a freighter ship transporting nuclear waste from France to Russia ... I do not want to think of what the Russians are doing with it ...

      I have 100% green energy, I pay full 8 euro a month more on electrickery (typo intended) for 100% wind energy, I live near the med coast ... ;-)

      Back to topic, why does el reg report this story, totally useless information! We cannot do anything with it, and I bet Greenpeace could not care less about that silly app!

    2. Sorry that handle is already taken. Silver badge

      Green power?!

      "Green power" is sustainable. Nuclear is not.

  10. E 2

    Two things

    1. "fondle slab". Absolutely brilliant! Better than "Jesus phone" by a long shot.

    2. Could the boffins perhaps find a way to turn the fondle slabs into very tiny, very clean, thermonuclear munitions in their own right? Then a quick back door hack could rid the world of the Apple strokers in one fell swoop!

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