Wait a minute...
..did I stumble on The Sun's or Daily Sport's websites by mistake?
A Manchester woman who took a tumble from her Wii Fit board is suffering an earth-moving side effect of the Nintendo-related mishap: she's now a nymphomaniac. "Randy" Amanda Flowers, 24, was diagnosed with "persistent sexual arousal syndrome due to a damaged nerve", the Daily Star explains. She's susceptible to the "slightest …
..did I stumble on The Sun's or Daily Sport's websites by mistake?
Not IT angle, mind you - but an IT angel, a mythical creature from the heavens, in this day and age brought to you in the safety and convenience of your own dorm by the interwebs. An IT angel is the closest to a partner most of us will ever get, so if IT is in the genes we will be the last generation, etc.
It didn't happen if you don't have the photos.
Lego will do at a pinch... :)
Not anywhere can I find a picture - we need to know whether we should "audition" for the role of superstud!
Come on El Reg - hook us up with a picture and a email address / phone number!
You've really got to be making this up, if I didn't know better I'd think it was April 1st.
Please form an orderly queue... no picture though so could be a right troll.
Paris because she loves it 10 times a day as well.
Mine's the one with the train ticker to M/cr in the pocket
Being single seams like the better option then relationship...that or an "open relationship"/husband who likes group sex
Are... you... serious?!
This is April 1st - right? Right ! ?
Even the daily star website doesn't have one, just a picture of a wii...
You just know she'll be a complete shocker don't you... Nymphos are never how you want them to be, or twins.
Single young lady who works in catering falls off Wii Fit...
Have to concur with Steve - probably a munter ...
So all-in-all, s'pect she's quite grateful for the whole nerve thing ...
Ok, unleash the PC backlash ...
Right. I bet you've got a face like a squashed skunk, you tosser.
... that might be misconstrued.
Face like a squashed skunk? yes and hung like one too. Masturbation? not so much. Don't see how that changes anything but feel free to get all aggrieved/despairing/judgemental.
It's amazing what you can get away with behind a metal studded leather-mask.
Paris, why not, I haven't used her for a while.
haha nice one
.... Screen, keyboard and can I have a fresh coffee as well please :)
Whenever i hear that word 'munter' i just think: that person's not got any choice about how god made her (or him - although blokes don't have the same pressure to be pretty). You on the other hand, have the choice to not be a complete fucking compassionless shitstain on the fabric of society. Men like you want their teeth smashing in and no mistake.
I'd like to get my post in early and say that if Miss Flowers needs a hand, or two - then she only has to contact me. And the rest of the salivating tech nerds on this very forum.
get out of your basements and find a decent place to work; the coding shop in which I work has more than a 50% female crew.
Some are beautiful, others make up for lack of "looks" with personalities that I would die for; O.K. most are attached, but there are geekesses out there that would probably not say 'no' if asked out. Bite the bullet (or the mouse, whatever), take a chance and you might even be able to leave your parents house soon.
that most of them are better and more conscientious coders than anyone I've worked with since the late 80's.
most probably haver better personal hygiene too!
I'll have to stop you there as I actually have a more time consuming and expensive morning grooming regime than any female I have dated since I started a decade and a half ago
should get a good price for it on EBay with that functionality.
..an ex of mine behaved somewhat like that (though fuelled mostly by coke and craziness). It's really exciting at first, but when you start noticing friction injuries on your bits from overuse, it starts to get a lot less entertaining.
Put me off the whole idea for a while, that.
I had my bits coated in Teflon.
you basically get no friction what so ever?
I think I can see a major flaw in your plan ;)
Do you still have her number?
where do I join the queue?
Apparently. My other half works in mental health and decreased sexual inhibition is a well known symptom of head injuries
However, this very brief nth-hand report doesn't make it sound like a head injury or a case of decreased sexual inhibition (not that I really know what that is).
Just give her a wedding cake. That usually fixes it.
It must ruin lots of other Wii games too. No point in playing Super Mario Kart if you always know who's going to come first.
And to the Wedding Cake reference also...
Ready and waiting here!
Which nerve is it, where is it located and how would one go about damaging it in the same way in, say, my wife?
ok its pretty crass, but come on who wouldn't want to know the answer to that.
Just get a Wii Fit, 'accidentally' spill butter on the board and wait.
You want your wife to want it 10 times a day? every day? And how many of those are you willing and able to provide? Did you read the above comment on over-used bits?? Fancy some calluses in unlikely places
I'd prefer a kind of on/off switch...
I really should have used the Joke Alert icon, shouldn't I?
<-------- Okay, here it is.
Saying that, who didn't think "that'd be awesome" before thinking about the practicalities of it? Rumcajz clearly did- an off switch would make this a really good thing to be afflicted with!
reproducing the accident?
Must get the missus a Wii!
One fluff piece like that out of the Star and half the male population turns into a bunch of giggling twelve year old boys.
I imagine something like that would become quite debilitating after a while.
Not that I wouldn't want to swap places with her for a few days though, you know, just out of scientific curiosity.
"I imagine something like that would become quite debilitating after a while."
Yep, she'd be walking like a cowboy...
Never think these kinds of things through.. for instance, would you really want to have sex with men 10 times a day for a few days?
(I am of course making assumptions based on the general geekiness of the register reader base; straight, nerdy and with interesting social skills (that includes me too btw)).. you may of course be a gay adonis with an who just wishes he had a larger libido.. I which case I guess my point is a bit moot)
you may of course also be one of the rare and beautiful beasts known as the Sysadminus Femininus.
I spotted one once, my god she was beatutiful :)
Sadly I'm neither gay adonis nor moderatrix. Besides, I have no doubt sockpuppeting is probably beneath our beloved Ms Bee. At the very least there will be minions for that sort of thing.
Just out of interest - why would swapping places with her imply having sex with men 10 times a day? Why would it imply having sex with anyone? That's the kind of thinking I was referring to in my first post, and which leads to the Star printing priapic nonsense like "Hopefully one day I’ll find a superstud who can satisfy me" ;o)
That really should be "Sysadmina Femina". The "-us" ending in Latin denotes male gender. The "-a" denotes female.
Unless "Feminus" means "..comes from Bangkok & is a ladyboy"...
...of the woman who had an orgasm every time she sneezed.
When asked if she was taking anything for it, she replied "Pepper!"
Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2018