back to article Robert Crumb begets Book of Genesis

Legendary underground comic artist Robert Crumb has caused a bit of a stir with his illustrated Book of Genesis - complete with biblical rumpy-pumpy and "gratuitous" violence, as the Telegraph puts it. Lot seduced by his daughter, as depicted by Robert Crumb The book prompted Mike Judge of God botherers' "think-tank" the …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Artistic licence

    It seems to me that if your caption clearly indicates that the bloke is so drunk he doesn't know that he's having sex, it might make more sense to draw the woman on top.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Go into a fundamentalist evangelica house

    Go into a fundie house, preferrably one with kids in their teens. carefully go with your finger across the side of the closed bible and try to locate the places where it is open most often. Open and guess what you will find...

  3. Tim Greenwood

    What next?

    So what's next on the agenda? It might be interesting to see if he could get away with interpretations of a few other religious texts. I must admit that the Koran was the first to spring to mind, but Hindu, Buddhist, Sikh, Jewish etc texts would probably be fun as well.

    Of course he might want to find a safe house first, as one or two people might be a bit more upset about it than the Christians seem to be.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Needs some extra bits...

    Where did Cain's wife come from, anyway?

  5. Colin Guthrie
    Grenade

    What Mike Judge was really thinking.

    Butthead: huh-huh-huh. Coool.

    Beavis: Shuttup buttmunch, he's taking the lords name in vein.

    Butthead: Oh yeah. What a dick.

    Beavis: Wow! Boobs! Sweet.

    Butthead: This is even better than when Mel Gibson played jesus.

    Beavis: He didn't look like Braveheart in that movie....

    Butthead: Freeedom!!!!!!!!

    Beavis: Shuttup douchbag, I'm trying to concentrate on the boobs.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    Bible "contains real stories about real people."?

    I think someone is confusing an eloborate religio-fundie fan-fic with Take A Break magazine.

  7. Lonesome Twin
    Megaphone

    There is no dark side of the moon...

    'Refreshingly, though, other Christians are less concerned.' Regardless of the content of the article, that's an editorial opinion, prob best left for a blog aomewhere?

  8. Jamie Kitson

    Reminds me

    of the Conservative Bible Project

    http://www.youaredumb.net/node/1401

    http://www.youaredumb.net/node/1406

  9. Ken Hagan Gold badge
    Pint

    Odd choice of position

    I'd always assumed that if Lot was too blotto to remember, his daughters must have ridden on top. In this version he just looks tired, rather than "tired and emotional".

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Well done!

    Right on! Well done Crumb! A hero to all of us free-thinkers!

    The bible is x-rated anyway! All that begetting going on! Violence? Smiting and turning people into pillar's of salt just for seeing something they shouldn't?

  11. David Evans

    Its been done before

    "Outrageous Tales From The Old Testament"; I think Neil Gaiman was one of the contributors; comic book retelling of a lot of those Old Testament tales. It was done pretty much straight from the bible and was certainly eye-opening if you haven't read some of the dodgier stuff in "the good book". The story of Jael and Sisera from the Book of Judges was particularly unpleasant as I recall.

  12. John Robson Silver badge

    Sex and violence in the OT...

    Wow, seems on a par with "dog bites man"

    The bible does have quite alot of behaviour illustrated*, not condoned. But read the bible if you want to read about some pretty poor behaviour.

    It's not necessary to be so graphic* in your descriptions, if I need an image my brain is capable of providing one...

    John

    * Puns deliberatly left in place (A good pun is it's own reword)

  13. Matt Newton

    @ AC 11:23

    "It seems to me that if your caption clearly indicates that the bloke is so drunk he doesn't know that he's having sex, it might make more sense to draw the woman on top."

    That wouldn't be the acceptable Missionary Position, then, would it?

  14. Chika
    Paris Hilton

    Crumb's a bum!

    I just thought I'd say that. However, the idea of an illustrated bible like that just might catch on! Anything that annoys the bible bashers is OK by me!

    The Paris angle? Well, it has PICTURES, doesn't it?

  15. Paul Hates Handles
    Thumb Up

    Re artistic licence @AC

    You can't have woman on top. The point of the man on top in the bible is that the woman is underneath... sort of asserting man's supposed superiority. It's one of the things that started off the jesus freak sexism in the first place.

    /orders

  16. Kevin 43

    RE: Artistic licence & Odd choice of position

    Indeed - how about cowgirl and reverse cowgirl!

    http://www.thebricktestament.com/genesis/the_seduction_of_lot/gn19_33b.html

    http://www.thebricktestament.com/genesis/the_seduction_of_lot/gn19_35b.html

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Grenade

    Real people?

    "It may surprise people but the bible does contain nudity, sex and violence. That's because it contains real stories about real people"

    Yep, the first "real person" has a wife that's made from his own rib. Does that make her a "real person"? What about all the bits with the sky-fairy and how he is (inexplicably) pissed off at everyone except the Israelites - despite the assertion that he made all of them too.

    Most the old testament can pretty much be summed up by "God killed everyone except us." or "God enabled us to kill an entire nation - yay!". That's genocide, so presumably if the story is true and Jehova is a "real person", the UN will by trying him for war crimes.

  18. This post has been deleted by its author

  19. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    @Paul Hates Handles

    Your ideas interest me, and I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter. Could you backdate my subscription to the edition which provides some justification for your theory that "the man [is] on top in the bible"?

  20. Anomalous Cowherd Silver badge

    @ Lonesome Twin

    Actually, given that at least two other christians were quoted saying as much, it's a demonstrable fact. Clearly "other christians" means "some other" - I imagine the Reg is unlikely to have polled all of them...

  21. Ian Ferguson
    FAIL

    Reminds me of when Life of Brian came out

    "I haven't seen the book but..."

    rather like

    "I haven't seen the film but..."

    or even

    "I'm acting on a completely uninformed knee-jerk reaction but..."

  22. Anonymous Coward
    WTF?

    have any of these fundies....

    ....Actually read the Old Testament ? As an aetheist, I actually have, and a more vegeance ridden, blood soaked, bonk buster would be hard to imagine...... All that begat-ing

    Crumb rules.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    re: There is no dark side of the moon...

    Lonesone Twin,

    A good number of news articles on El Reg (particularly in the bootnotes section) include such editiorial opinion by the writers. I can't say I'm always crazy about this myself, but would say that this is part of El Reg's in-house style; I suspect that despite saying "regardless of the content of the article," it was exactly that which made you comment.

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    hmpfff

    I can tell that the reg is to worried to allow the christians to post an amusing snide comment at another religion :/

    bah humbug

    your PC crowd out in force today ?? or worried about retribution from a readers comment.

    AC cause i f'ing can

    meh now i am annoyed

  25. ToucheTheTurtle
    Grenade

    @Tim Greenwood

    "So what's next on the agenda? It might be interesting to see if he could get away with interpretations of a few other religious texts. I must admit that the Koran was the first to spring to mind, but Hindu, Buddhist, Sikh, Jewish etc texts would probably be fun as well."

    Umm, the old testament part of the bible was claimed by the Jews long before it became a Christian book.

    I think it would be a brave person who did one of the Koran though, after the what happened in Holland with a few cartoons.

  26. Osvaldo
    Thumb Up

    Re artistic licence @AC

    Also, Noah certainly KNEW that he was having sex - a completely drunk man (even if not elder) could hardly "perform"... he was just the first to use booze as excuse for inadequate behavior. ;-)

  27. Donal Gavin
    Thumb Up

    nice

    @ Matt Newton

    Nicely said, hahah

  28. Oninoshiko
    FAIL

    Re: what's next

    Last I looked, Jews had the book of Genisis as well. (albit not a King James authorized translation)

  29. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    Re: hmpfff

    Oh - I rejected that comment because it wasn't especially amusing and was barely coherent.

    Also, AC (whose name I can still see, if you didn't know) I'm not sure if you meant to call me a moron in another thread but consider it a strike if you did. (If you didn't, well, you need to work on your grammar.)

    Now if you'll excuse me there are 152 comments in the queue.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    Pint

    Re: AC "Jehova, war-crimes"

    Good show!

  31. Ken Hagan Gold badge
    Welcome

    Re: Re: hmphfff

    "Also, AC (whose name I can still see, if you didn't know) ..."

    Mmm, and *even* if you've never registered, The Moderatrix still knows all. Wacky Jacqui's got nothing on Sadistic Sarah.

  32. Mycho Silver badge

    @What's next

    Webster Cook could tell you how well Christians take perceived insults to their faith.

  33. J 3
    Troll

    bwahaha...

    "It is turning the Bible into titillation. It seems wholly inappropriate for what is essentially God's rescue plan for mankind."

    I'll come back to write a comment after I stop laughing.

  34. J 3
    Alien

    OK, I'm back

    "Where did Cain's wife come from, anyway?"

    That's easy. He was a mofo. Or sisfo, maybe? Oh well, I have read Christians openly accepting the inevitability of incest due to the simple fact that Cain had no one else to have his kids with...

    152 comments on queue!? Sheesh... far from me inflating that even more, then.

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Big Brother

    Re: Re: Re: hmphfff

    "...avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith Sarah Bee ...."

    Be afraid, be very afraid, etc, etc.

    That's your Lot. Pass the Salt Wife....

  36. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    @Chris Webb

    Yes, the 10 commandments are my favourite bit of the OT: "Which 10 commandments do you mean?" Hilarious.

  37. barfridge
    Happy

    He just gave them what they asked for

    Quote: "The Bible is a very important text to many many people and should be treated with the respect it deserves."

    Isn't that exactly what the esteemed Mr Crumb has done?

  38. jake Silver badge

    I've been grinning over this all afternoon.

    Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, but Crumb could do this one justice!

    I know what I'm giving my fundie brother in law for Christmas; if I'm lucky he'll stop talking^Wpreaching at me every time I see him ...

    I can't wait to see what Crumb does with Gen. 1.1+ v.s. Gen 2.4+ :-)

  39. SageOfTen

    Not the first illustrated camp bible

    The Reverend Brendan Powell Smith already plumbed this well some years ago in 'The Brick Testament' only with litttle plastic figures doing naughty things.

  40. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Faith is?

    Faith is making a virtue out of not thinking right - so not only do they not want their "faith" offended, but they're also encouraging _NOT_READING_ something which is evidently based on the original source text and presented in a way that the proles can understand (with pictures, as the old book is a bit wordy)...

    And here people who like to think of the bible as some puritanical nonsense get offended by this?!? These are people who obviously haven't read the various morally abhorrent and horrifically bloody stories that make up a good portion of it. Child abuse, rape, torture, murder, enslavement, genocide (is genocide OK if it was God?) the list goes on and on and on.... Read yer bible folks!

    "Jesus Saves" - whatever!

  41. Lionel Baden
    Black Helicopters

    @sarah

    nope wasnt you the comment was directed was directed at, should of put quotes around his comment. soz

    yeah about writing coherently on monday mornings is not one of my strong points.

    i live with it

    actually make that most mornings

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    Next from R Crumb....

    Can't wait to see his version of the Koran. "And the trees cried, Oh servant of Allah, there is a Jew hiding behind us. Go forth and kill him." Sounds like fun for the entire family. Let's see if he has the brass balls to do it (Unlike the creator of South Park, who ran scared of the Moose-lems).

  43. Estariel
    Thumb Up

    Kissing and fighting

    The Old Testament is full of kissing and fighting, shagging and killing, just like life. Which seems to make it more credible to me rather than less....

    The cautious reviewers are saying "if Crumb misrepresented or abused the text for gratuitous sex and violence, then that is bad"

    The welcoming reviewers are saying "if Crumb has accurately illuminated the text and retold it faithfully, then that is good"

  44. Throatwobbler Mangrove

    hmmm

    "Can't wait to see his version of the Koran. "And the trees cried, Oh servant of Allah, there is a Jew hiding behind us. Go forth and kill him." Sounds like fun for the entire family."

    You know what's weird? I thought that sounded interesting so I went off and googled it. But it turns out that that's not from the Koran but a hadith i.e. not the Koran but an interpretation or commentary. And then the other odd thing is that the only places to carry that quotation are frothingly mental anti-Islamic sites/forums...and wikipedia, quoting a frothingly mental anti-Islamic site.

    Would it be possible to source that quotation with a bit more precision on where it came from, anonymous coward? There's surely enough ridiculous nonsense sprinkled throughout ancient religious texts and modern anti-Semitic nonsense without anyone needing to make up more...right?

  45. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    If you're going to pick a fight

    It may as well be with the most illogical and reactionary person in the room. Nice to see the Torygraph wearing its sad little heart on its sleeve.

    @Tim Greenwood, I did have a try at this a few years ago with a less than totally reverent, East Londonised version of the Ramayana, sadly never produced, but fun to write.

  46. Winkypop Silver badge
    FAIL

    Oh these Relig-0-tards do make one smile

    Talking snakes

    Incest

    Rape

    Murder

    Paedophilia

    Torture

    Genocide

    What an imagination they have.

    Who else follows a 2000* year old guidebook?

    * or there abouts.

  47. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    I have it on good authority

    (from his agent) that Robert Crumb intended to, essentially, use artistic license to make a version based on vaguely rewritten OT, but when he sat down to draw it, he realised he didn't need to - the OT was already sufficiently graphic etc.

    The drawings are, indeed, intended to be an accurate representation of the text.

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