back to article Welsh mum amazed by Marmite Messiah

Aficionados of Jesus simulacra can add a Marmite lid to the list of places the Son of God has chosen to manifest, following a Welsh woman's discovery of the Messiah's likeness formed from the delicious tar-based spread. Claire Allen, 36, spotted the astonishing face as she was poised to poison son Robbie, 4, with Marmite on …


This topic is closed for new posts.


  1. Flugal
    IT Angle

    Here we go again.

    "“I often see Jesus’ face in a lot of things I do. And there are a few times I can think of when I’ve seen the face of Jesus in a window. But he’s never appeared in my food before.”


    I can't for the life of me think WHY it is always believers who "see" faces of Jesus in things. Wouldn't be anything to do with humans having a predisposition to see human faces in anything, twisted by sky-fairy worshippers to being their saviour.

    Although I did do a shit that looked like Ronaldo the other day...

  2. Steven
    Dead Vulture

    This story means nothing without evidence!

    This story means nothing without photos! And the Welshy newspaper website has been downed by all the god seeking masses wishing to bestow their eyes on his holyness in all his marmity glory.

    We demand pictures!

  3. Colin MacLean

    Me too

    I sometimes see Jesus at the bottom of a beer glass. Usually around my 8th of the day.

  4. Gav
    Thumb Down


    Looks more like the Mekon to me. But then I'm not a loon, just a nerd.

    Seriously though, why is god messing about with sub-Blane magic tricks when there are so many other things omnipotence could be sorting out? You know, minor things like war, famine, Britain's Got Talent?

  5. Nick Goldman

    anti-Marmite bias?

    I'm a bit distressed about some subtle anti-Marmite bias in this article.

  6. Simon
    Jobs Horns

    Love or Hate???

    So this was written by a biased marmite hater... damn you! Damn you all to brown sticky goo hell....

  7. M. Poolman


    definitely Zappa

  8. Lionel Baden

    excuse me ??

    why as of late have we had multi posts on the same article !!

    especially as trivial as this one !!

    if a story is good enough to be re-posted why not just bump the original up again

    It is getting annoying re-reading stuff.

  9. Citizen Kaned

    to me...

    it looks like some beardy hippie with a big fat dooby in his mouth

    how can they see something that looks like someone who is a made up creation of the god squad? i mean if JC really even did exist i dont think he was a white guy was he? :)

  10. Peter Simpson

    Judging from the picture...

    ...He appears to be sticking out his tongue at her.

  11. Dennis

    Re: tar-based spread

    "delicious tar-based spread"

    Are you maligning my mate Marmite ?

  12. Dave Harris


    Looks more like Rasputin to me

  13. John Pierce

    Another "appearance" in Texas

    Texas couple finds Jesus in a Cheeto

    Updated: Monday, 18 May 2009, 7:49 AM EDT

    Published : Monday, 18 May 2009, 7:47 AM EDT

    DALLAS - A Dallas couple says they found Jesus in a cheese snack.

    Dan and Sarah Bell bought a bag of Cheetos at a gas station.

    "I had eaten most of the ones out of my hand and this one was still left laying there and I said 'Oh my gosh, look at this! It really looks like a person in a robe praying,'" Sarah Bell said.

    She showed her husband.

    "I just looked over and I went wow! It does look like... it looks like a praying Jesus," Dan Bell said.

    The couple nicknamed it "Cheesus". They said they believe it's a reminder of blessings from God.

    "But primarily I think it's a funny Cheeto," Sarah Bell added

  14. TeeCee Gold badge

    Not Jesus.

    That's the Phantom of the Opera sucking his thumb!

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    what a loony

    While it does look a little like a person it is nowhere near as good as the cheese sarnie.

    And marmite is lubbly and not satans jiz.

  16. Anonymous Coward

    It looks like...

    George Harrison. Or, at a push, John Lennon...

  17. foo_bar_baz
    Thumb Up

    Looks more like a skinny version of

    Lemmy of Motorhead fame.

  18. pc

    The ace of spades..

    Lemmy - is that you?

  19. Hans
    Thumb Up

    Ann Robinson was right

    and here's the proof

  20. Ray

    Non Devout Believer in Multiple Marmite Miracle Mesmer!

    "I often see Jesus’ face in a lot of things I do"

    Almighty Jah is trying to tell this lady something. I wonder what it could be? My advice to all: you can only ignore prophetic truths like this for so long.

    Also, I seem to remember seeing The First Coming represented in toast format on this site in the not so distant past. Could these two events be related?

    Think about it. Browned Hovis. Marmite. In the Shape of the Face of the Son of God. A New religious festival is henceforth born: Yeaster. THE COMMERCIAL POSSIBILITIES ARE AVAILABLE FOR NEAR LIMITLESS EXPLOITATION.

    Get To It, People.

  21. Paul Murphy

    Yep - looks just like him

    Got that special birthmark as well.

    sheesh - religion is so last century, who really bothers with it any more?


  22. Dark Ian


    A great reason to become religious. Because let's face it, if Jesus wants to make his presence known, he's going to do it through Marmite.

    The only surprise here is that they haven't (yet) tried to sell the lid on eBay.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ah ha!

    " she was poised to poison son Robbie, 4, with Marmite on toast"

    I guess we know not what side of the Marmite line (why does that sound rude?) Lester Haines is on, then.

    And by the way, of all these "I found an image of Jesus in (insert whatever here)", this is the least Jesus-y of the lot. Doesn't even look like a face.

  24. Peter Hawkins
    Thumb Down

    Son of God ??

    Looks more like the bass player from Spinal Tap

  25. Mycho Silver badge

    Will somebody please...

    ... forward a link to "Lenin in my shower curtain" to everyone who thinks they've seen a face so it must be Jesus?

    Worshipping a blob of marmite seems to be the textbook definition of idol worship.

  26. Ferry Boat

    Marmite is the mother of invention

    Nope, it's Zappa. He's on the good ship SS Mould too.

  27. Andy ORourke

    Clearly Mad

    “I just looked at it and immediately thought, that’s Jesus Christ.

    “It wasn’t a new jar, but I’d never noticed that before.”

    Well when I looked it looked more like the lid off a marmite jar with some marmite on it

  28. boltar Silver badge

    Jesus Christ

    At least that was my response. Either shes a canny operator and will sell this so some bible bashing sucker on ebay for a small fortune, or more likely , shes just another credulous inbred village idiot with zero concept of the idea of random chance producing vaguely face like patterns. With people this dumb in the population is it any wonder that religion gets such a toehold in all civilisations?

  29. Kwac


    is what it looks like to me.

    Silly season starts earlier and earlier every year. Is it related to global warming?

  30. Anonymous Coward

    Looks more like Billy Gibbons

    of ZZ Top.

    If you ask me.

  31. Steve Evans

    Us lovers always knew it...

    'tis the food of the God(s)!

  32. Richard

    I LOVE Marmite

    but being such a scynic if it does look like the holy one, someones put it into photo shop and rotate/twisted it slightly

    Still i'd rather have ol JC in my marmite lid than mould

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward


    "Allen admitted she isn't very religious"...

    “I often see Jesus’ face in a lot of things I do."....

    Best you pretend to be religious love, it's the only way you can get away with seeing things, and listening to voices that aren't there without getting locked up!

  34. SuperTim

    Ok, and the news element is....?

    Assuming that she didnt put it there herself, it doesnt particularly look like jesus. I guess silly season started early this year.....

  35. Greg

    Jesus? That's not Jesus!

    It's Richard!

    Or perhaps it's just a bit of Marmite...

  36. Anonymous Coward


    And look what you can see if you turn it upside down....

  37. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)
    Thumb Up


    Come on, kiddiwinks, how's about a show of thumbs for or not for Marmite?

    I like Marmite, but it's got to be suitably thinly spread and marbled with the butter and not overwhelming.

  38. Anonymous Coward

    How could you forget?

  39. Alistair Stewart

    Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

    Looks more like Ringo Starr to me

  40. DirkGently

    I'm Glad

    Glad to see the Register is spreading the good news.

    Actually, according to the law of averages, someone on the lookout for these kind of images has probably seen it in a pile of dog poo. I guess it would be unlikely they'd call the local rag for that though.

  41. D
    Black Helicopters

    Seeing god on a marmite toast

    is just natures way of telling you to take your medication.

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up


    Who could possibly not like Marmite, suitably thinly spread, marbled with the butter and not overwhelming?

    (Especially when endorsed by Jesus.)

  43. ian

    Looks like Zappa to me

    And as he said: "It's not getting any smarter out there. You have to come to terms with stupidity, and make it work for you." Obviously this woman is taking his advice.

  44. Beelzeebub


    God does not exist, and neither do I

  45. John Robson Silver badge

    We're really good

    at seeing faces in things aren't we.

    Just one of the optimisations in the human brain - dedicated facial recognition circuits mean that often we get a "face" signal for really weak images.

    Ho hum...

    I'm not going to hail our new yeast based overlords...

  46. Mycho Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    My mate Marmite

    Thickly spread, on wholemeal toast by preference.

  47. Joe

    Its NOT Jesus

    It looks nothing at all like the photo I have of him.

  48. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    Re: *yawn*

    I like Marmite and so does the wife.

    What's wrong with eating tar anyway?

  49. Maliciously Crafted Packet
    Thumb Up

    Marmite is great...

    I like watching Americans try it just to see the look on their faces. For some reason they just don't geddit.

  50. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    @Sarah Bee

    I'll give it a cautionary thumbs up since it is tolerable that way. Though my anti marmite bias is still there since I was tricked into eating it the first time.


This topic is closed for new posts.

Biting the hand that feeds IT © 1998–2019