back to article Male chimps strike 'meat for sex' deals

Researchers have confirmed that male chimpanzees who share meat with females mate twice as often as those who prefer to keep their food to themselves. These "meat for sex" deals, observed among chimps in Ivory Coast by Dr Cristina Gomes and colleagues from the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology, are significant …

COMMENTS

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  1. Vladimir Plouzhnikov

    Interesting...

    At least it's clear here - the females get more food. I was often wondering what evolutionary advantage our homo sapiens females get when they seem to prefer stuff like diamond rings and sapphire earrings...

    The title of the article is a bit misleading - "male chimps strike meat for sex deals" - this sounds a bit like they strike these deals among themselves while the poor females end up with no sex and no meat.

  2. Alfonso Vespucci

    To coax with a piece of bread.

    This reminds me of a poem a school friend of mine wrote. I can only remember the first 2 lines:

    If I could coax a girlie into bed,

    With nothing but a piece of bread....

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Plus ca change

    Chimps with meat, or dinner at a fancy restaurants.. nature has it's rules it seems.

    Paris as she like her meat too.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    Is that why...

    ...fat lassies are classed as easy?

    <Ducks to aviod flying shoes>

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    What's new?

    The principles are the same with humans. Meat has changed to credit card, but it's a similar concept!!

  6. Rob
    Coat

    So what they are really saying is....

    .... fat human girls are an easy lay if you have some cakes going spare.

  7. al
    Paris Hilton

    piece of ass for a piece of ass.

    hmm....

    btw, is it alright to offer tofu to vegan chimps ?

    Paris, coz likes biting meat during s*x

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Is that headline writer strike still on?

    I am shocked, *shocked* that the opportunity for a "meat for meat" gag was passed up

  9. Alfonso Vespucci

    Brings a whole new perspective to....

    "Raw Meat 3"

    Pass the mind bleach.

  10. Tom

    Am I the only one..

    who read it as "Male chimps stroke meat for sex"

  11. Jim Coleman
    Happy

    At last

    Now we see prostitution in animals. Can we please now legalise it for humans, now that we know it's perfectly natural to pay for sex? Eh?

  12. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    Re: this entire thread and all who sail in it

    Jesus meat-exchanging Christ.

  13. MnM
    Stop

    Bandwagon Alert!

    This is good stuff, a bit unsurprising, but great to have it witnessed in the field. But what's going on with this further study nonsense?

    'Dr Gomes suggested the findings might offer insights into human evolution. The team's report specifies: "Similar studies on humans will determine if the direct nutritional benefits that women receive from hunters in foraging societies could also be driving the relationship between reproductive success and good hunting skills."'

    What??? Read Alfonso's lament, his school friend already knew the answer when he was at school! Work out more about how human the monkeys are please, not how monkeyish we are - I'm satisfied that we evolved FROM them, give or take a gorilla.

  14. M
    Heart

    Inspired by this story

    When I was in the pub yesterday, I found that 7/10 women rejected my offers of raw meat. One accepted then reneged on the deal. The other two were, well, chimp-like in their acceptance.

    Still. Not an entirely unsuccessful strategy

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    So the deal is still:

    "First dinner then sex!" and after all these years evolution has done nothing for us!

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    The World's Oldest Profession

    They're catching up now, they'll be living alongside us in no time.

  17. Sweep

    I have the opposite problem

    There's a monkey on my back and if i don't feed it, it fucks ME.

  18. Oliver Smith
    Coat

    Sausauge Time

    Mine's the one with the River Cottage Meat Book in the pocket.

  19. JimC Silver badge
    Stop

    @Coleman

    That something occurs in the animal kingdom isn't necessarily a great argument for legalisation - unless of course you want cannibalism, incest, and eating the bloke over the road's offspring legalised too..

  20. Richard
    Happy

    may I be the first....

    to invite Ms Bee out for a steak....

    ;-)

  21. D@v3
    Coat

    SURVIVAL OF THE err Fittest??

    that is all

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    hmmm

    > unless of course you want cannibalism, incest, and eating the bloke over the road's offspring legalised too..

    ---

    oki - skip the incest part but if I could eat the kid in the flat upstairs from me I'd be quite a happy bunny ;)

  23. Mycho Silver badge

    Dinner and flowers.

    What's new?

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    Plus ca change indeed

    "...sounds a bit like they strike these deals among themselves while the poor females end up with no sex and no meat."

    The researchers didn't publish the bits about the pimp chimp striking the deal and getting the meat., and the female just getting the sex.

  25. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

    Re: may I be the first....

    I see you have just outed yourself as a chimp. In which case I think I'll skip, thanks.

  26. Graham Marsden
    Joke

    Home Office Press Release

    Jacqui Smith today announced that the Government will be introducing new legislation to prosecute male chips who offer meat to female chimps without first ensuring that the female chimp is not under the control of another male chimp...

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    (untitled)

    Seems it's probably just normal practice to me. Those in a relationship or ten have good reason to work at them, so share what they get. The lonely and rejected souls get to keep what food and stuff they get, for themselves, having learnt that being generous can lead to just being taken advantage of.

  28. al
    Paris Hilton

    Re: may I be the first....

    > ... outed yourself as a chimp. In which case I think I'll skip, thanks.

    make sure you do not pass a chimp for a gorilla. Chimps are most well endowed amongst the great apes (I am sure you've given up on humans by now).

    @richard

    btw, I've reasons to believe Ms.Bee prefers Bacon sandwiches.

    Paris, coz she might eat a chimp.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Sarah Bee

    You know, complaining about crude comments on this article is like complaining that the hold of an oil tanker is slippery.

  30. Tom
    Thumb Down

    bullshit

    What's to say that the chimps didn;t have a relationship previously which endeared a partnership which in turn encouraged the sharing of food? you know, like i do with my missis... utterly disgraced with the way scientific research is going these days.

    1. think of ridiculous theory

    2. find way of observing results to fit your theory

    3. write paper of your findings leting everyone know just how much better you have made the world thanks to your awe inspiring jeeneyus

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    How can I put this without appearing crude...

    Nah, not possible...

    @tom - you had me laughing out loud...shame on me.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    RE: The World's Oldest Profession

    "They're catching up now, they'll be living alongside us in no time."

    Please credit them with *some* intelligence.

  33. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Tom

    1. read brief article about study

    2. don't read the actual study

    3. make ridiculous assumptions about methodology based on incomplete information, and insult authors on that basis

  34. Anonymous Coward
    Boffin

    Meet the meat

    Key difference between chimpanzee and Man, is that Man has to cook the food first. I suspect this is the main reason that restauraunts have evolved.

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Male chimps strike 'meat for sex' deals

    Apparently when a male chimp is rebuffed by a female, he will

    take a chunk of meat an strike it against a tree or the ground

    creating a grand display. Hence the term, 'beat your meat'.

    Paris says, "How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?".

  36. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    and nobody is wondering......

    WHY is this guy spending such a long time studying chimps having sex?

    If he's stored video clips of this on his laptop, will he get done for illegal pornography???

    "Yes officer. Its purely for research. Honest. Yes, all 1000 pictures and 50 videos of monkey sex. Want to see a monkey get his meat out for some cute little femail chimp?"

    Paris, because she's definitely been filmed accepting a large portion of meat. Several times. Rather noisily.

  37. Allan Dyer Silver badge
    IT Angle

    More like marriage...

    two individuals forming a longer-term partnership for the benefit of their offspring.

    It was the earlier studies that were looking for prostitution.

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Huh?

    The only difference between Marriage and Prostitution is the duration of the arrangement. Marriage always been about women swapping sex for financial security (ability to provide food for offspring)?

    These days women can often provide for themselves (and their offspring), so we have started to see more women choosing to become single parents (simply because they can - I assume that because they no longer need a man to provide they no longer can be bothered putting out for guys they barely tolerate at the best of times).

    Smiley face because thankfully my wife still needs me to provide financially.

  39. DZ-Jay

    Re: So what they are really saying is...

    No,

    >> "...could also be driving the relationship between reproductive success and good hunting skills."

    What they are really saying is: the more sex you have, the better you hunt. Practice makes perfect.

    I wonder if this is translated to modern vocations, say, software development.

    -dZ.

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