back to article Ann Summers yanks chocolate willy spread

Visitors to Ann Summers hoping to get their laughing gear round some chocolate willy spread will have to make do with a Chocolate Dick on a Stick (link NSFW) following the sex shop chain's withdrawal of a range of melamine-laced choc products. The retailer has pulled said spread, plus "a related nipple spread and a novelty pen …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    melamine

    Isn't it used to fiddle protein levels?

    Paris, because she's swallowed her fair share....

  2. Jerome
    Heart

    What a cock-up

    I guess in a situation like this Ann Summers just have to suck it up and swallow their pride.

  3. Dominic Kua
    Joke

    Surely this was a perfect chance

    To say "Ann Summer's Yanks Wonky Willy's chocolate"

  4. Jim Coleman
    Joke

    I wonder...

    ...if they sell Knob Cheese as well as Willy Spread? And do they do Leg Spread and Chocolate Starfish?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    when will people learn

    "precautionary" withdrawals are never a safe option.

  6. ShaggyDoggy

    Oh well

    back to mars bars then

  7. Loki
    Joke

    remove the offending product

    Quote: Ann Summers said: ".... taken all relevant steps to remove the chocolate willy spread ..."

    So... where exactly had they put the spread and how difficult was it to remove, and was it indeed, widely spread?

    PS: Anyone who doesnt see the IT angle here needs their head examining....

  8. JakeyC

    Precautionary withdrawal

    A "precautionary withdrawal" (snarf snarf). So much innuendo, so little time.

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    oh come on....

    obviously someone was dicking around with the stuff :)

  10. Richard
    Joke

    Testing?

    Do we really want to know what testing is to be done with regards chocolate willy spread?

    "Ok, this is spread #4, applied to John's cock, please suck him off and give us your thoughts."

    "mmmm"

    -- Richard

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Don't care

    Nutella is cheaper and tastes nicer, so this doesn't affect me. Except that I'm bound to be beaten to all 3425436 innuendos that need to be said here.

    I'll even leave you to roll your own PH jokes if you know what I mean...

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    And this has

    what to do with IT? ... oh look Ann Summers catalogue, what was I going to say.

  13. This post has been deleted by its author

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Stop

    More stuff then this on wiki

    Try searching for cowgirl and frot. This will be minus any netnanny or filter with pictures and photographs in places.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    "a related nipple spread"

    I've been trying for hours now to find a way of reading that delightfully subtly disturbing piece of phrasing that doesn't sound totally wrong

  16. kain preacher Silver badge

    Chocolate Dick on a Stick

    made by Le bang. Le bang sounds like a porn name.

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Willy wonka's choco-au-lait factory

    There once was a man from Nantucket, whose d1ck was so long he could suck it. As he wiped off his chin, he said with a grin, if my ear was a c*nt I could f*ck it.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Then when haven't they informed purchasers of it? customers health not important?

    Oh so they've recalled it.. then when haven't they informed purchasers of it?

    Customers health not important to them?

    Or have the beancounters just decided the statistical risk of getting sued is low?

    I think my wife and I will be boycotting Ann Summers from now on, on the grounds of a lack of transparency - unlike their undies!

  19. Jared Earle
    Coat

    Have they got it licked yet?

    I'll get my coat

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