* Posts by miknik

268 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Sep 2007

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Apple 'iTV' looks like Cinema Display, says Throat

miknik

Re: This will be interesting

"Being able to use the iPod touch, iPad or iPhone as a remote on the other hand, that would be quite nice... especially if the tv could stream its image to the small screen during toilet breaks"

That would be funny, watching Samsung hit back at Apple for copying the "look and feel" of the tech their TVs already have.

Web super-TV turns EXTREME sports fans into sofa-dwellers

miknik

Re: ".............and base jumping (parachuting off tall buildings)"

If all they jumped off was buildings it would be called B jumping. BASE is an acronym for Buildings, Aerials, Spans (bridges), Earth

Facebook prospectus shows jump in users, fall in profits

miknik
Trollface

$200 million profit?

So with one of the more recent conservative valuations of $50 billion the ROI will be 250 years.

Almost looks like Zuck paid for Instagram about what anyone with any sense would pay for FB.

Zuckerberg blew $1bn on Instagram 'without telling Facebook board'

miknik

we really have to give him credit for that.

I'm guessing he doesn't need credit any longer

Oakley: 'smart' sunglasses ready to shine

miknik
Thumb Down

Re: Yeuch!

'sport' or exercise as some people call it, but obviously not you Fats...

'Unibody' iPhone 5 said to debut in October

miknik
FAIL

Re: a more-compelling reason to upgrade might be the next iPhone's almost-certain LTE capability

Po-tay-tow/Po-tat-oh

I like my barmaids pretty, you like them with a more consumer friendly design. My use of the word pretty extended beyond the physical manifestation of the phone itself and to the front end of the operating system.also.

My point is that if you look at the spec the original iPhone lagged behind the competition in several areas of hardware but by presenting the experience in a nice package it sold significantly better. As you say the strategy has worked well, so why should LTE be a factor to getting upgrades now?

miknik

a more-compelling reason to upgrade might be the next iPhone's almost-certain LTE capability

Au contraire.

As the first incarnation didn't do 3g yet still flew off the shelves I can only surmise that looking pretty is what sells iPhones to the masses, not data connectivity speeds.

Commodore founder Jack Tramiel dies at 83

miknik
Unhappy

RIP

So long and thanks for everything your company did to enhance my childhood years. A true pioneer of modern day computing.

Regulator probes Groupon as shares tumble

miknik
Trollface

Today's Groupon special offer

Buy a $26.11 share for just $15.27!!

Terrafugia flies first prototype: Flying cars 'within a year'

miknik
Unhappy

I love the idea but...

The problem as I see it (in the UK at least) is most GA friendly airfields have grass runways which aren't flat by any stretch of the imagination. Couple that with the fact that most publicly maintained roads have more pot holes than GA airfields have bumpy runways and you are left with the stark realisation that this thing just doesn't have enough ground clearance to be of practical use.

If you don't obliterate the thing landing it, you probably will driving it home. Oh, and it's a tail dragger just to make it a bit less user friendly...

Use the holy word of God to stay secure online, says bishop

miknik
FAIL

Passwords derived from Jules' monologue in Pulp Fiction, for example, might be popular.

Not if people are using bible quotes they won't. Jules' monologue is mostly made up and even the part which isn't is only a vague interpretation of the actual text in the bible

Bio student thrown in the clink for Muamba Twitter rant

miknik

His defence should have been...

""I think the Tweet was taken out of context and some people have interpreted it maliciously"

Worked for Diane Abbott

Baffling barcode-on-steroids stickers plaster the Earth

miknik

Re: Recursion

No, a QR code containing a link to https://www.google.com/search?q=google would break the internet though.

Nokia invents teeny throbbing tattoos to make your skin crawl

miknik
Thumb Down

Re: MRI + metal tattoos

IIRC the myth was tattoos explode in MRI scanners. They put a heavily tattooed woman in an MRI scanner and her tattooes didn't explode, then they made some different inks and tattooed some pork belly and scanned that too.

Details or no details they still got a result. Maybe not proof enough in your eyes, but certainly enough for me not to worry about my tattoo in an MRI scanner.

Ten... in-car gadgets and accessories

miknik
IT Angle

A squishy stig?

You could have filled that gap with something useful, perhaps a bluetooth OBD2 adaptor? £10, free smartphone apps available, plug it into the diagnostic port and read and clear engine fault codes and see live sensor data from your engine.

Good for the nerd in you if you fancy some digital gauges on your phone and will pay for itself the first time you use it if your engine management light ever comes on.

Solar storm arrives, nobody notices

miknik
Mushroom

Let's cut to the important stuff here

What measures will be in place to protect LOHAN from taking a pounding by repeated high intensity solar ejections?

Two Brits in court over Michael Jackson back catalogue hack

miknik
Thumb Down

50,000 files?

C'mon please. MJ died at 50, to have a back catalogue of 50,000 files would mean recording around 3 every single day the guy was alive...

Syndicate

miknik
Unhappy

Re: predictable

Such a shame, I loved this game back in the day...

"selected" followed by dispensing mini gun wrath everywhere, happy days.

Heatmiser PRT-TS Wi-Fi RF thermostat

miknik
Thumb Up

Re: £200 ?

I know right? Who the hell spends £1,000 on gas either? Oh wait, I do every year.

This will pay for itself in no time, perhaps not for you but I'm not on the 9-5 so being able to switch on the heating as I leave for home rather than rely on a dumb timer is a real money saver.

Ten... digital adult toys

miknik

Re: So basically...

Fuck em.

Fondle my slab, baby: Inside the tactile world of Apple-fan iDating

miknik
Trollface

That's unlikely to happen

Considering how many baristas must be on the site...

Attention tweeters: Your chance to win undying GLORY

miknik
Coat

Congrats, you are our 10,000th follower.

Will you be offering to enlarge my penis next week, or telling me about all the hot horny singles in my local area?

New patent will give iPhone screen interactive 3D

miknik
Facepalm

They patented interactive 3D??!!??

Oh noes, I use interactive 3D all the time! Does that mean I have to pay licencing fees now or should I just gouge out an eye?

New driver-snooping satnav could push down UK insurance premiums

miknik
FAIL

[Citation needed]

Why would they topple a Smart?

Do Smarts have any history of toppling? No.

Did they fail the elk test? No.

Do you understand the concept of centre of gravity? No.

Can you see round corners? No, then the corner can block your line of sight.

Job-seeking Marriott hacker gets 30 months' porridge

miknik

I'm a consultant

ohaithar Marriot,

This may have cost you between $0 and $600,000.

That'll be $400,000 please.

kthxbai

Upgrade eliminates Atlantis from Google Earth

miknik
Thumb Up

A sad fact?

How is it sad that we know more about the surface of the moon than the sea bed? It's freaking AMAZING that we know anything about the surface of the moon!! Space exploration FTW!!

Mother charged with selling fake Facebook stock

miknik
Coat

My bail is $50,000?

Hmmmm, will you accept Facebook stock?

iPad Fleshlight lets fanbois express their love

miknik
FAIL

Finger on the pulse

This is old news, even the date in the article you link is 05 06 2011, which adjusted to english is 8 months ago. You should almost be running a story about how one of these has given birth to mini iPads by now...

No bail for Kim Dotcom

miknik
Facepalm

Law enforcement agents really are switched on

His helicopters could be used to escape, by means of flying away? Who knew?

At least I can sleep easy tonight safe in the knowledge they will be looking on his servers for files, not in his sock drawer.

Starship Voyager dumped into skip

miknik
Go

How can location be a problem?

Once you engage warp doesn't space shift around it?

American search team fails to find women's G-spot

miknik
Coat

All that time and effort for an inconclusive result

bet they felt a right bunch of cunts

Megaupload kingpin found in panic room when arrested, say cops

miknik
Coat

They should have expected firearms

After a dotcom bust surely a dotcom boom must follow?

Quantum physics to encrypt clouds of the future - boffins

miknik
Trollface

Well I've never managed to find a quantum computer

I clearly know too much about it's momentum.

Angry Brides lob stilettos in dowry shakedown takedown

miknik
FAIL

Would it have been better to marry an Indian girl and...?

Nah.

It would have been better to say to her parents "Get fucked. I love your daughter, I'm going to be true to her and treat her properly and dedicate myself to her 100% and if you can't accept that without a financial incentive then you are nothing more than a pimp who considers their daughter as a whore" and taken your money and spent it on your family home/children/life together.

Just sayin'

Virgin Media takes itself in hand after punter-package tickle whoopsie

miknik
Trollface

Me too

Ever since I took an arrow to the knee I have been a virgin, or something like that.

Crossley cops two-year suspension

miknik
Trollface

Don't worry, he's on the radar...

Although to Andrew Im sure this is a minor inconvenience, somewhat akin to his train being delayed by 10 minutes or something like that.

Cupertino lawyers mull 'driPhone' name ban

miknik

If Apple weren't so litigious I may have some sympathy

The fact their whole trademark makes up part of this guys product name is probably why they have the arse, it's not just the use of "i" it's "iPhone".

If I brought out a hot cocoa based beverage and called it Cococa-cola I would expect a letter from the lawyers.

Still, Apple love trying to sue everyone for anything so fuck em, I hope they get pwned by the small guy.

Oz skeptic offers prize if Rossi’s E-cat works

miknik
Facepalm

You will need 3 keyboards

if you want to read the Sydney Morning Herald "article" all the way to the bottom. This was my favourite bit:

"A community group will gather to discuss the work of an Italian inventor who claims to have developed a machine that can produce large amounts of energy from almost nothing."

I'm sure the first law of thermodynamics will put a reasonably swift end to that discussion, then I assume it will be time for the snake oil auction.

SMH seems an appropriate acronym...

Stratfor slaps website back online after Anon mega-hack

miknik
Thumb Down

Selfish prick

"With the credit card information stolen, I assumed that the worst was done. I was wrong. "

In other words "We looked bad about the credit cards and I thought that was bad but at least it didn't affect me, then I found out they had fucked with my shit too and that was worse"

The loss of your customers data is the worst aspect of the situation as they are totally blameless and trusted you with that info, whatever happens to your servers etc is secondary to that.

Chrome beta promises super-fast URL loads

miknik
Trollface

Life is full of contradictions

So to predict what is about to happen next, prepare for it in advance and serve up the end result as quickly as possible is desirable in the browser world?

Sadly, after beta testing it with the gf I can confirm it's not such a hit in the bedroom. I can relate to why the version number is so high though.

SEVENTY-FIVE wirelessly charged devices will demo at CES

miknik
Trollface

Just how I like them

Unique USPs are my favourite kind, non unique ones are no better than boring old SPs in my book.

iPad SURVIVES FALL FROM SPACE

miknik
FAIL

“As far as we know, this is the first iPad ever in space”

Thom Cafaro obviously isn't an El Reg regular

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/10/29/launch_televised_by_nasa/

Android Market tops 400,000 apps, climbing fast

miknik

User rating manipulation is the next big thing

I downloaded a game the other day as the user rating was so high. I played it a few times and it was ok, then it hit me with a message offering me a free power up in exchange for a positive review on market, it even gave me a button to click to go straight there and it suddenly became clear why there were so many 5* reviews.

I've never used the Apple app store, but the problem with any distribution channel which contains so much content is always going to be finding an effective way of sorting the wheat from the chaff. Good job El Reg do app of the week I say :)

Brits got Kindles for Christmas

miknik

Its all about price and marketing

I would have bought anyone in my family an e reader for xmas, they are cheap enough to do so. There are only a couple of members of immediate family I would have spent £400+ on to buy a tablet.

As for all the Kindle/Kobo/Sony is better debate, it's immaterial. Look back over the years and you will see many examples which illustrate that it doesn't matter which product is technically better, the key to success is marketing. Kindle have nailed it with a product which is good enough (although maybe not the best) and a marketing and distribution chain which can't be beaten.

Do you think my 80 year old grandparents are more concerned about DRM or the ability to buy a book in 1 click from a website they know how to navigate?

Asus asked to decrypt Eee tablet bootloader

miknik

@Probing Analyst

My Galaxy Nexus came with a locked bootloader. Not encrypted, but it still had to be unlocked (with message informing it *may* void the warranty)

Stephen Hawking seeks geek to maintain his unique wheelchair

miknik
Thumb Up

£25k is £25k

It's easy to sit there, having worked half your life and sneer at how pathetic the salary is considering the job description. I wouldn't do that job because I earn more than that blah blah blah.

This isn't the sort of job you would do forever, it's aimed at someone young and eager. So great, you wouldn't do it because you earn 2/4/8/16 times that salary, but you probably didn't when you were 21.

£25k is a good starting wage for a young graduate, the assumption that people should be able to go straight into earning £40k+ is worryingly prevalent amongst youngsters to the extent many seem to believe it's their right. Berating positions like this based on the money simply engenders this concept further.

If I were fresh out of uni today I would scrub toilets for £25k, so I would sure as hell fix wheelchairs and make some phone calls.

Ofcom's Local TV dream: No smut, an hour of news, endless ads

miknik
Thumb Down

All about content

I watched a documentary about a year ago where one local cable operator had started piping the local CCTV over one of their channels, blurred enough to stop easily identifying people but with sound.

It was outrageously popular, I'm sure they were pulling in around 40% of the daytime audience or something ridiculous like that. Find the right content at the right price and there is no reason local tv couldn't work.

Motorola Pro+ Qwerty Android smartphone

miknik
Unhappy

I miss T9

Predictive text on a physical keypad is the one thing I do miss since everything became touch screen. I could type respectably quickly if I used both thumbs and I could type using one thumb without having to look at the phone.

Still, that's progress. Pure functionality doesn't sell as well as big screens and slick animated UIs.

Nissan Leaf battery powered electric car

miknik
FAIL

Technically legal in fact

All new cars in the UK are required to have daytime running lights which you cannot turn off with the engine running as of this February. Look at any 11 or 61 plate vehicle and you will see them.

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