AM I the only.....

pedantic old fart who is going to complain that it isnt a Henry in the basement??

Henry is red and black!!!

All in all an enjoyable read though

And now you understand

why Apple are trying so hard to get Samsung phones banned in every country in the world.

(As usual, I will point out that I am a neutral observer, I do own a Samsung phone but it is an extremely dumb B2100)

My phone is a tool used for TALKING to people (so "old fart" icon).

I am waiting for Win9.....

Which I suspect will be Win7 in a frock.

Only joking, I am still sticking with XP.

99% from AMERICAN testers

Does this mean it can go around corners properly without heeling over like a sailboat in a typhoon???

Oh, OK, I wouldnt mind one, it looks a LOT better than the alternatives (except for this Chinese 3 wheeler that appears to have been inspired by TRON).

Paris - she LOVES big electric toys!!!!!

IRIS

Naming it after my (blind) Great Grandmother says it all.

Will it also smell of Lavender????

HEY!! The nerds get a date with a REAL LIVE WOMAN, that is PRICELESS as far as they are concerned!!!!

I am taking valuable time away from my clan army to post this!!!

I look forwards to.....

Viktor Orlov dressed in a cat suit and informing people not to get the two websites confused.

Paris of course, she has such a nice pussy.

Green Tax Refund

Does this mean we can all ask the government for our tax money back; I especially look forwards to the removal of the "Green Energy" taxes that have tripled my electricity bills in the last few years.

(Having studied "Future Ecology and Alternative Fuel Sources" at Birmingham U in the late 70's, I am fully aware that ALL of the Global Warming policies are bollocks.)

That's me in newspaper stuffed clothing as I cant afford to heat my house any longer.

I am betting he doesnt have a girlfriend.

A wild idea

1/ Other than the border troops stopping his subjects from sneaking across the border, all of the DRNK military forces are facing South - correct??

2/ The Chinese dont want a war any more than the rest of us, but equally, they dont want ANY US influence that close to their borders. - correct??

3/ The PLA have a large standing army of their own and the NK's trust them.

So China sends its army into NK, deposes the fat kid from South Park and all the old generals, sets up its own puppet government and feeds the starving masses with Vietnamese rice.

This stabilises the region, gives its own military a bit of a work-out and shows the West it is a force to be reckoned with while also playing at being one of the good guys.

It also gives them a nice new population who will work for nothing - compared to Shenzhen where the wage bills are getting a bit too high.

A new source of cheap undies for Paris.

I am not saying W8 is bad BUT............

...I notice that they are so desperate to up sales figures that the latest ad only tells you one thing...

IT PLAYS ANGRY BIRDS!!!!

WinXP user until AT LEAST Win11

I presume 3,499999 of those clicks are webspiders.

I didnt see any mention of how long you can expect the battery to last in real life; I am not a smart phone owner, but I understand this is given in minutes rather than hours these days.

Kudos to Samsung for the replaceable battery - how many do they supply with the phone?? 4-5 should probably be enough to keep you going for a full day or two.

(Owner of a "dumb" Samsung phone with 18 DAY battery life)

I stopped buying games when they started insisting on an internet connection, most of my games get recycled onto the childrens computers at work when I am finished with them, but the boss wont allow them to be connected to the internet.

I dont think I have bought an EA game this century.

Will they "age" C3PO and R2D2 by giving them rust streaks??

Picture of Luke Skywalker as he is now.

Qihoo 360 IS malware; and rightly recognised as such by many western AV/malware programs.

IF you can manage to remove it from a system and then do a scan with a REPUTABLE scanner, you will find dozens - if not HUNDREDS of infections.

(Been there - done that).

This means the pizza will be cold when it arrives.

Will NASA get the pizza for free ?? SOP for late pizza delivery.

So that is......

1 year for the technology to mature - after all Samsung have already demonstrated it.

1 year to "borrow" the design from another (probably smaller) firm impatient with the slow development

1 year to construct the ad campaign, convincing fanbois that this is the best thing since sliced iBread, and raising their demands for it to fever-pitch.

Then 1 month for Chinese slave labourers to make it (including 29 days delivery by Chinamail).

I've found plans to make an EMP gun online, I already have some suitable, heavy duty 20KV capacitors, so can anyone donate the guts of a commercial microwave oven for the construction phase??

Ré speed, the government REALLY dropped the ball by not increasing the motorway speed limit; it is well known mpg drops off dramatically over 50-70mph (depending on the vehicle), so raising it to 100mph would vastly increase the revenues from fuel tax (and VAT on the fuel tax - an unlawful double taxation).

Sent from my fortified bunker (with tinfoil roof).

Time wasting

I am sure that somewhere, someone with too much time on their hands has already got IE10 running on Win3.1.

I have XP and Win7 boxes, I also prefer XP, it lets me do things Win7 refuses to allow, or makes very difficult, like use the full capabilities of my HP printer, which only has XP or Vista drivers (and NO WAY am I installing Vista!!); or my ancient, but excellent Epson GT7000 SCSI scanner - how ancient?? It shipped with a Win95 install disk.

No I am not a tightwad, I have had THREE newer scanners, but none of them is as good as the old GT, either too noisy, too fussy or just too damned LOUD.

The icon depicts me with my first pint mug of "morning" coffee - the extra strong stuff to get me moving. (I wish I really had that much hair left).

On a more serious note

Kinetic power could easily lead to over charging; after all fanbois perform a lot of vigorous up and down actions with their (curled) hands.

Russian grils are usually prettier - but Chinese girls make better wives.

International dating is more fun, although a bit more risky as well; I had years of nice (and cheap), holidays before I finally met the woman of my dreams - in CHINA

I just wish I had met her 20 years earlier.

Rules of Internet Dating

1/ DONT SEND THEM MONEY

2/ Dont fall in love with a photo - it may be ancient, fake, or heavily photo-shopped*

3/ DONT SEND THEM MONEY

4 /Google search is your best defence against scammers.

5/ DONT SEND THEM MONEY

I was internet dating for about 6-7 years before I got married; I quickly ditched the UK sites as they were full of weirdos and people lying about their age/weight.

I trawled foreign sites, including FSU sites (Former Soviet Union) , as my last real love was Czech; and eventually ended up on a Chinese website where I met my future wife.

I wouldnt agree with the 10 emails suggestion, unless you live really close to each other and meeting is no big deal; I WOULD suggest video chatting, as you can learn more from a few minutes of that, than you can from weeks or months of emails.

The above rules apply to all internet dating, regardless of age colour or creed; there are plenty of spammers out there targeting every possible age group and social situation.

* I can post a website link with an example if wanted.

I miss the app that turned everything in FireFox into Swedish Chef speak, is it still available??

By adding LOLCATZ, and not Klingon, Twitter proves it is for the cranially challenged and not for us uber endowed nerds.

Phale.

GOOGLE are trying to patent Prior Art

After all, there are PLENTY of scifi stories with these glasses in, Star Wars - The Empire Strikes Back being the most obvious to me while still 1/2 asleep.

Qihoo 360 is JUST like Microsofts Browser!!

Qihoo's 360 is just a rip off of Internet Explorer anyway; I came head to head with its malware-like properties in 2011 when I diagnosed my (Chinese) wifes PC as being infected.

360 ACTIVELY BLOCKED attempts to remove the infections, re-installing them when I DID manage to get rid of them and refusing to allow its self to be uninstalled.

The only sure way to get rid of 360 is to format the HDD and start from scratch (JUST like many M$ browser products); no wonder my AV and AntiMalware programs list it as Malware !!!!

Maybe now I can get rid of FBPhotoZoom; an extension I NEVER asked for and that has NO obvious way of removing (only disabling).

I have assumed the FB bit means FaceBook, which is doubly annoying, because I dont HAVE a FB account.

Another multiple payment "error" and another few millions to earn interest on until they get around to returning it ...... a month or so from now.

Ebay & Paypal - I wouldnt touch them with a poo covered barge pole.

Bet the official version with have to be iCrippled, so it only works with iSpoons and iChopsticks.

Also, watch for Apple changing the shape of the next iPhones lower case - so that you have to buy a new iBowl.

Never mind, this is the perfect gift for the iDrone in your life.

iGoing now.

iBye

Got both - dont care which is supposed to be best.

My theory is that shiny screens look better when switched OFF, or when showing a blank screen with the M$ logo screen saver running.

I own both types and dont really have a preference - but then I am one of the few people who still like watching a CRT TV - again I also own a decent LCD, but even though the CRT is not "Hi Def", I still think the picture is better, so the CRT has pride of place in the living room, and the LCD hangs on the wall in the bedroom for the wife to watch.

PS I own glasses with an anti reflective coating - isnt this basically the same as a matte screen???

PPS, Over 40 and not humming shiny happy people - still humming Dumb Ways to Die :-0

and QQ's English/Chinese translation tool cannot translate "QQ" and has a hissy fit if you try.

2:20 PM GMT

and my install of Foxit updated itself - bug fixed??????

Also

BLOATWARE ??!! Compared to Adobe it suffers from anorexia!!!!