* Posts by herman

207 posts • joined 31 Jul 2007

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Two foreigners, a desert and a jeep full of bank statements

herman

Re: Round trip

I have driven from Pretoria to Cape Town in 11.5 hours in the 80s. That requires a nice little BMW and 200 km/h at night through the Karoo.

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Climate change alarmism is a religious belief – it's official

herman

Now that the churches are getting on the band wagon, it basically proves that we need not take any of it seriously, since Church and Science don't mix.

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Oh, shoppin’ HELL: I’m in the supermarket of the DAMNED

herman

Hmm, in all places I've been, these infernal automated annoyance machines have been ripped out about 5 years ago and replaced with ordinary manned tills again. The machines cannot solve simple checkout problems; for that one still needs at least one hand and an IQ of about 90.

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ISIS command post obliterated after 'moron' jihadi snaps a selfie, says US Air Force

herman

Nice, so now all Daesh needs to do is have a supporter post a selfie from the front of an opponent's house, then wait and watch the US destroy it.

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Mac bug makes rootkit injection as easy as falling asleep

herman

As I understand it, it is not the falling asleep that is the problem, it is the wake-up. So if you are using a Macbook, close the lid and you'll be safe as long as you don't open it again.

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Naked cyclists take a hard line on 'aroused' protest participant

herman

So how many people gasped as the sight of erect nipples and clits?

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Sex disease surge in US state partly blamed on hook-up apps

herman

Well, this add yet another wrinkle to bit banging interfaces.

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Chap mines Bitcoin with PUNCH CARDS and ancient mainframe

herman

Ach, these young uns. Just do it by hand on paper. Like a real computer used to do.

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SAVE THE PLANKTON: So much more than whale food

herman

Uhmmm, yeah, millions of reasons why not to drink sea water, apart from the usual fish and whale poop.

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Manchester car park lock hack leads to horn-blare hoo-ha

herman

Opening the windows is a cost saving measure. That way, a petty thief doesn't need to break one to get in and steal your parking change.

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herman

Why? 'Cause it is cheaper, yet they can sell the car for more, since it is a feachurrr...

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herman

Re: Another reason for a physical key..

Only at lower speeds - depends on your car. With a 2.5 ton American V8, you always need steering assist and brake assist.

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HAPPY 20th Birthday MICROSOFT BOB

herman

Bob is bit like playing Myst, but without the haunting music.

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herman

Re: Bob > 8

Now that you mention it...

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Pundits ponder perilous placement of STANDING STONES on Comet 67P

herman

Re: Promises

Man, you just made me snort my coffee.

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Al Franken to FBI: We need MORE revenge smut arrests

herman

These pictures are a self correcting problem, because people get older and uglier every year.

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White House taxes Silicon Valley to skill-up American workers

herman

Scary job

In that photo, I dunno which is more scary, the console, or the lady's hair style...

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Right Dabbsy my old son, you can cram this job right up your BLEEEARRGH

herman

RSD

Well, it is always a pleasure to meet another honored member of the RSD (Royal Dyslexic Society).

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Dying to make time lapse videos? No? Well, Microsoft is doing it anyway!

herman

Because with MS, the machines are too slow for real-time streaming...

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What the BLEEP? BitTorrent's secure messaging app arrives

herman

Ring sounds pretty good actually. Now I just need to get everyone and his dog to switch from Skype...

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USA Freedom Act moves forward as House prepares for vote

herman

Weasel words

So what new weasel words will the spooks use to be able to carry on recording everything - digital delay lines for ephemeral information?

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Australia cracks tech giants' tax dodge code

herman

Alternative Minimum Tax

This can be fixed with an age old strategy that every country has for individuals, called the "Alternative Minimum Tax". They should just make that apply to corporations. Basically, tax is calculated two ways, and you got to pay the worst one.

http://www.irs.gov/Businesses/Small-Businesses-&-Self-Employed/Alternative-Minimum-Tax-%28AMT%29-Assistant-for-Individuals

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Microsoft: Profit DECIMATED because you people aren't buying PCs

herman

Death March

MS is a slow motion train wreck, or a software death march. Despite spending huge amounts of money and heroic effort, every new product is a dud. It reminds me of those that came and went before it: Control Data, Digital Corporation, Sun, Silicon graphics...

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Something's missing in our universe: Boffins look into the SUPERVOID

herman

If you stare into the abyss, then the abyss will stare right back at you.

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Dwarf planet Ceres has TEN bright spots, astroboffins say

herman

'Whoosh...' Clue: That line is from a song.

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Revealed: The AMAZING technology behind Apple's $1299 Retina MacBooks – a lot of glue

herman

Re: The hacker spirit...

...but, but, but... you can still take 42 of them and make a medium sized Beowulf Cluster...

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Bloke hits armadillo AND mother-in-law with single 9mm round

herman

Well, this is just the worst case of bad luck ever - she survived!

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Google offers 'INFINITY MILLION DOLLARS' for bugs in Chrome

herman

Re: Google admits there are INFINITY MILLION bugs in Chrome!

Try Hotel California next time. They always have room.

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Crack security team finishes TrueCrypt audit – and the results are in

herman

I'm almost sorry that they didn't find a backdoor.

However, absence of evidence is not proof of absence...

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Nuclear waste spill: How a pro-organic push sparked $240m blunder

herman

Glow in the dark cat poop

The real question is how many other drums are filled with the wrong dirt and who is going to open them all to take a look?

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'Virtual nose' makes VR less dizzying, say boffins

herman

I would guess that adding virtual hooters to a simulation will help a lot for half the population, since the male brain will totally ignore everything else that is in view. Although except for the two pointy objects it may make the whole simulation completely pointless.

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Watching porn makes men BETTER in bed, say trick-cyclists

herman

Wow, the next thing they'll find, is that it doesn't cause hairy hands either. What is the world coming to? Think of the children when you bust these myths.

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Forget viruses: Evil USB drive 'fries laptops with a power surge'

herman

Re: Like Unicorns and Fairies

It is like pins in halloween candy. Feasible, but so improbable, it never actually happened.

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VMware sued, accused of ripping off Linux kernel source code

herman

Re: Case..

Wrong. Very wrong. I used to work at a very large Defence company who ended up paying M$4 due to a GPL copyright case some years ago. There were several lawsuits based on Busybox as another example. A quick google will find those.

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I, ROBOT ~ YOU, MORON. How else will automated news work?

herman

What? Dabbs is a real person? That is unpossible.

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Lenovo CTO: Hey, look around – we're not the only ones with a crapware infection

herman

Decrapifier

I wonder if http://www.pcdecrapifier.com/ handles this yet.

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Amazon tries to patent 3D printers on trucks

herman

I already patented 3-D printers on drones.

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'Utterly unusable' MS Word dumped by SciFi author Charles Stross

herman

You should use ed. It is the standard.

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Did NSA, GCHQ steal the secret key in YOUR phone SIM? It's LIKELY

herman

GSM was always easy to crack

Now we know that it was even easier than that.

No big difference.

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Lenovo shipped lappies with man-in-the-middle ad/mal/bloatware

herman

Re: Microsoft hardware

leopard

You should return your geek card for that error.

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Back seat drivers fear lead-footed autonomous cars, say boffins

herman

Roller coasters

This is why roller coaster rides are scary - the loss of control.

Now imagine getting into an autonomous taxi with a Fitipaldi driver profile and the passengers screaming all the way to/from the airport...

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RadioShack lists 1,800 stores facing the axe across America

herman

Re: It's perhaps an image of the demise of technology in the US

Funny that building a tube amp is still just as much fun today as it was 50 years ago. The only difference is the Bluetooth module now needed at the front end http://www.aeronetworks.ca/2015/02/cool-amplifier.html

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herman

Sparkfun

The Shack was done in by stupid management and eventually made obsolete by Sparkfun Electronics.

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$10,000 Ethernet cable promises BONKERS MP3 audio experience

herman

If this cable advert succeeds in opening up one person's wallet, then it was all worth the effort...

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IBM chasing ex-staffers for $20 payments

herman

Well, the IBM CEO has to finance his new yacht somehow.

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Forget Norks, Russian hackers are in Sony Pictures' servers – claim

herman

Re: The FBI Director must have been cringing with embarrassment..

Exactly. The Norks could not possibly have downloaded all that data over their national AOL dial-up modem account.

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herman
Big Brother

Re: Je suis Sony!

Seven eyes data sharing - the usual five plus NK and Russia.

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Enough is ENOUGH: It's time to flush Flash back to where it came from – Hell

herman

Yah, having Adobe on your resume is a huge black mark for any programmer. Anyone that ever worked at Adobe, is unemployable.

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Drinking to forget? OK. But first, eat a curry... QUICK!

herman

So if you eat a lot of curry, you won't be scared of getting the trots. Figures...

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Keylogger: Somebody STOP ME! Oh hang on, I just did

herman

Basically everyone now needs a dedicated keyboard with encryption built in so that a simplistic key logger will only log gobbledygook. Then you can use a different keyboard for each application. One for Excel, another for Word...

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