* Posts by Joe User

379 posts • joined 30 Jul 2007

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Terror bomb victims demanding Iran's .ir will appeal US ruling

Joe User

Re: Can we have .com & .gov then please

And while you're at it, the citizens of Libya, Iraq, Afghanistan, Sierra Leone, Serbia, Argentina, Ireland, Indonesia, Egypt, India, and many others would like to have a word with U.K. officials....

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Brit GUN NUT builds WORKING SNIPER RIFLE at home out of scrap metal!

Joe User

A "gun nut"?

In my country, he would be referred to as a "patriot".

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One year on, Windows 8.1 hits milestone, nudges past XP

Joe User

Re: The answer is still no.

Vociferous: "Run a checkdisk and/or replace the HD. A bad sector in the swapfile will make your windows machine crawl for seemingly no reason."

Exponential algorithm making Windows XP miserable could be fixed

A decade of patches makes svchost.exe a very sad boy indeed

http://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2013/12/exponential-algorithm-making-windows-xp-miserable-could-be-fixed/

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Globe-spanning SEA-ME-WE 3 sea cable feared cut, broken or ...

Joe User

Re: TV show "Mighty Ships", look for Tyco Resolute

Here's the video:

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xvlowj_tyco-resolute-mighty-ships-discovery_tech

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Masala omelette

Joe User

Re: Fire ring

"Interesting that the nation that discovered Mexico and the Americas where chilies originated are not big fans of hot'n' spicy food"

Perhaps the Spaniards just like to be able to taste what they're eating....

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Sealed with a kiss: Er, 80 MILLION BACTERIA

Joe User

Re: Ok, I'll be the one to ask.

Yes, and it isn't good:

HPV-Linked Throat Cancer May Have Telltale Signs

http://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/hpv-genital-warts/news/20140320/hpv-linked-throat-cancer-may-have-telltale-first-symptoms

HPV = human papillomavirus, the cause of genital warts.

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FBI impersonated newspaper to finger school bomb threat suspect

Joe User

Pot, this is kettle

I'd like to know how often the Seattle Times' reporters have impersonated someone else to get more information for a story....

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Pesky POS poison won't Backoff

Joe User
Holmes

Pay cash

Problem solved.

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Swiss wildlife park serves up furry residents to visitors

Joe User

Re: "restrictions should be slapped on the numbers of births in the park."

By posting "No Shagging Zone" signs.

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Hipster chimps are SLAVES to the latest social trends

Joe User
Trollface

Next up

Chimps camping in front of Apple stores before new product releases.

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Big dinosaur wowed females with its ENORMOUS HOOTER

Joe User

Meh

I have co-workers with bigger noses than that....

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Blood-crazed Microsoft axes Trustworthy Computing Group

Joe User

No surprise here

Most knowledgeable people don't consider Microsoft and its products to be particularly trustworthy or secure....

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DARPA-backed jetpack prototype built to make soldiers run faster

Joe User
Joke

Low-tech method

Tie a steak to the soldier's backpack and turn the dogs loose.

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City hidden beneath England's Stonehenge had HUMAN ABATTOIR. And a pub

Joe User

Re: So basically...

If my job was to carve the flesh off dead people, I'd require loads of ale, too.

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China is now 99.8% sure you're you, thanks to world's-best facial recognition wares

Joe User
Facepalm

Re: "...from 91 angles."

> Or blind.

> Or totally absorbed in their phone conversation.

Or texting, right before they trip over a low wall and fall into a fountain:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeVn6_iwtJQ

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Beer in SPAAAACE: Photographic PROOF

Joe User
Thumb Down

Re: Should have used Budweiser

American Budweiser is labeled "beer", but it is more akin to the liquid output from a horse.

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Bright lights, affordable motor: Ford puts LED headlights onto Mondeo

Joe User

Re: Shit plastic

The cars look like they have a bad case of cataracts.

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Gigantic toothless 'DRAGONS' dominated Earth's early skies

Joe User

Re: ROC

A species confined to Autralasia is responsible for the Arabian stories about Rocs?

More likely sailors' stories about the elephant birds, which were native to Madagascar.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elephant_bird

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World's only flyable WWII Lancaster bombers meet in Lincs

Joe User
Headmaster

"P52"? I think you mean the P-51 Mustang.

The original P-51 used an Allison V-1710 engine, which worked well below 15,000 feet but lost power at higher altitude. The Allison-engined planes were the P-51A Mustang and the A-36 Apache (ground attack and dive bombing). They performed very well in their designated roles.

The P-51B was fitted with a Merlin engine. The two-stage supercharger on the Merlin is what allowed it to perform well at high altitude. The Allison V-1710 engine also worked fine at high altitude, when fitted with a proper supercharger (as it was in the P-38 Lightning).

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Snowden leaks latest: NSA, FBI g-men spied on Muslim-American chiefs

Joe User
Megaphone

To put it simply . . .

You're all guilty until proven innocent (whatever our definition of "innocent" might be at that time).

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Warrantless snooping on American man was LEGAL in terrorism case, rules US judge

Joe User

Re: Only a lawyer

Trying to blow up innocent people at a tree-lighting ceremony is not my definition of "freedom".

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Code Spaces goes titsup FOREVER after attacker NUKES its Amazon-hosted data

Joe User
Holmes

Re: Backups

Let this be a lesson to you, boys and girls: off-line, off-site backups were invented for a very good reason.

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China puts Windows 8 on TV, screams: 'SECURITY, GET IT OUT OF HERE!'

Joe User

A more accurate translation

"Microsoft would no longer open its Windows 8 source code to the Chinese government, however the security scheme of the Windows 8 operating system is designed to provide better access for Microsoft to users' database. For China it's a big challenge for our cybersecurity," said Yang Min, a professor at China's Fudan University, through a translator.

Meaning, "It's more difficult for the Chinese government to hack into Windows 8 systems without looking at the source code."

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US broadband providers holding last-mile traffic ransom, ISP alleges

Joe User

Re: I'm not surprised....

There are a few places where the local city government has installed their own metro-area network that sells TV, Internet, and phone services to its constituents. The cable TV companies are very upset about having direct competition at those locations. But this is by far the exception, not the rule. :-(

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Joe User
Flame

I'm not surprised....

Those greedy bastards are raising their rates while providing as little service as possible (and paying their top execs big bonuses). Many of them have local monopolies in the areas that they service, so they have no incentive to provide improvements ("Don't like our service? Then go with another cable TV company for your Internet. What's that you say: there isn't another cable TV company at your location? Gee, that's too bad. Hahahahaha!!!!").

</rant>

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El Reg's Deep Outback XP upgrade almost foiled by KILLER ARACHNIDS

Joe User
Happy

Willowra, such a lovely place

What, no mention of Mad Max or Aunty Entity?

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Joe User

Solution for the Java update nags

Disable SunJavaUpdateSched (jusched.exe). No more nagging about updates, but you'll have to remember to do them yourself from time-to-time.

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What did you see, Elder Galaxies? What made you age so quickly?

Joe User
Headmaster

Correction

Make that "there are some things even science can't explain -- yet".

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UK's CASH POINTS to MISS Windows XP withdrawal date

Joe User

Re: NCR

"The banks mainly use Windows because of the excellent remote management offered which isn't/or wasn't until recently available for Linux."

I don't know which rock you've been living under, but Linux has had remote management in various forms for a _long_ time.

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Joe User

Re: "realised the capital cost of paying for the existing ATMs"

And having ATMs cuts down on the number of customers coming into the banks' offices, which reduces the number of tellers needed. This saves the banks a lot of money, but apparently they don't factor that into the equation....

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Florida bloke cuffed for pit bull shag outrage

Joe User

Re: Those eyes! They will give me nightmares...

Clearly a Marty Feldman wanna-be.

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Fee fie Firefox: Mozilla's lawyers probe Dell over browser install charge

Joe User
Flame

Re: Are they blond?

what should happen if a customer totally incapable of doing this for themselves

If someone is "totally incapable" of installing a simple package like Mozilla Firefox, their fingers should be sewn together, and they should be promoted to manager.

£16.25 to install Firefox is outrageous and Dell knows it....

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HTML is a sexually transmitted disease, say many Americans

Joe User

Re: Bozhe moi...

I thought that yottabytes only attacked little green people....

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Aargh! My EYEBALLS are MELLLTING! Curse this DEVIL LAPTOP

Joe User

In other words...

The gist of these studies: Don't let your mice use your laptop all day long.

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Toshiba opens curtains, reveals air-cushioned 5-terabyte terror

Joe User
Devil

Re: My instant erase procedure

1. Take hard drive to target range.

2. Place drive at 30-meter mark.

3. Blow several holes in drive using high-velocity rifle.

"Gee, there seems to be a few gaps in your data...."

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Dell staffers head for exit armed with redundo cheques

Joe User
Trollface

Be careful what you wish for. . .

You might just get it.

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Microsoft's new CEO: The technology isn't his problem

Joe User

Re: Simple advice for Nadella

Windows 7 versus Windows 8 isn't a horse versus car comparison, it's car versus car. In Win 8, Microsoft rearranged the pedals and put the steering wheel in front of the passenger's seat. Not an improvement in my book (and many other peoples', judging from the lackluster sales).

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Joe User
Megaphone

Simple advice for Nadella

Give customers what they want, not what you think they should buy, and your sales will improve. (Yes, I'm talking about Windows 8.)

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Gene boffins: Yes, you. Staring at the screen. You're a NEANDERTHAL

Joe User

Re: Define extinction

Those African humans had interbred with other human ancestors, so there really is no such thing as "pure" human.

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US card scammers pull $2m petrol heist

Joe User

Re: If found guilty

My vote:

- Northern jail in the winter, with no heat.

- Southern jail in the summer, with no air conditioning.

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Walking while texting can – OUCH! – end badly, say boffins

Joe User

The dangers of texting while walking

Because those indoor fountains are so hard to see:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mg11glsBW4Y

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Boffins find ALIEN WORLD orbiting the Sun's LONG LOST TWIN

Joe User

Lack of planets in star clusters

They're trying to figure out if there's something different about planet formation in clusters that would explain why so few worlds have been spotted in them.

Gravitational disturbances from the other relatively near-by stars?

Lack of material due to it being absorbed by the abundance of stars in the cluster?

Just my 2 cents' worth....

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Top patent troll sues US regulators for interfering with its business

Joe User

Re: re: re: leave Waco

And a steak knife is a bayonet, too....

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Intel shutters BRAND NEW chip factory as PC market storm rages

Joe User

Re: Desktops aren't dead, they're just resting!

Cue the "bring out your dead" scene from "Monty Python and the Holy Grail".

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Mountain bike mishap man suffers SEVEN WEEK stiffie

Joe User

Re: How on earth...

Seriously. I don't know how he managed to last 7 days, let alone 7 weeks....

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Microsoft to RIP THE SHEETS off Windows 9 aka 'Threshold' in April

Joe User

Re: Will anyone still care?

And sysadmin stress test....

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Dell will AXE up to ONE IN THREE workers in its US & EMEA sales teams

Joe User
Headmaster

Re: New Dell motto

"Pink slip" as in "slip of paper". Termination notices are usually printed on pink paper in the U.S.A.

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Joe User
Trollface

New Dell motto

Dude, you're getting a pink slip!

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Antarctic ice shelf melt 'lowest EVER recorded, global warming is NOT eroding it'

Joe User

Re: Point 3

As for nuclear power plants, if they are so safe why can't we all have one in our homes?

For the same reasons that you can't have a massive coal-fired power station in your home:

1. It won't fit.

2. The economy of scale is back-asswards for one house.

3. You couldn't afford to buy one, no matter what the payback period is like.

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Sensation: Chinese Jade Rabbit FOUND ON MOON

Joe User
Trollface

Re: Most

If that were so, kudos to them for their budget control.

But when it gets a BSOD, who's going to press the Reset button?

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