* Posts by Shadow Systems

204 posts • joined 26 Jul 2007

Page:

What's black, sticky, and has just 8GB of storage?

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Grifter, Re: Wtf.

Spot on.

If I were in the market for something like this, I'd be "forced" to buy the Windows version (thus rewarding MS with the sale of a "Windows device" even if they're not getting any money off a Windows license), just to get the hardware that doesn't blow rancid monkey spunk.

Fuck that. Utter bullshit.

Now I feel like getting one of the Windows ones, giving it a script to send an email stating "You Suck & here's why..." to Intel once every sixty seconds until they find where in the Mall I've hidden it in order to disable it. At which point the next one kicks in to start sending the emails (from random compromised email accounts, through random proxies, to randomly chosen Intel email address') just to keep the fun going.

And when they find that one, the next starts up, then the next & the next & the next. Like an "Annoy-O-Tron" from ThinkGeek.com only set to send email instead of chirping incessantly.

Dear Intel. Thanks for offering a nifty product, but did you _really_ have to go the AssClown route in order to offer the Ubuntu model? Half the ram & piss poor onboard storage? Seriously? And it *only* saves Forty bucks? If those components only cost Forty, then here's another Hundred-&-Twenty to put it back then triple it. What's that? You can't do it because that's *not* the cost of the hardware you stripped out to bring the price down? Then what _IS_ the excuse for screwing the Linux community by offering such dubious "savings"?

Grrrr...

12
2

Teaching people to speak English? You just need Chatroulette without the dick pics

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Doctor Syntax, Re: Ladybird.

Couple those styles of books with a Siri style Talking Assistant.

The TA shows a picture of something, there's the spelling below it, & the TA slowly highlights each letter as it's spelled aloud.

Then the TA asks you to spell the word, highlighting the letters again as you do so, then asks for you to read the whole word, & gives a bright green check mark "Good Job!" graphic/audio, or has you repeat the lesson until you get it right.

It can start with simple ABC's & 123's, progress to three letter words, & once you've correctly read/spelled all the ones in it's database, "Achievement Unlocked! Your Reading Skills have gained a Level!" at which point it goes to four, then five, then six, & seven letter words in obvious steps.

By the time the "Player" is up to eight letter words, they're effectively fluent to all intents & purposes.

You can make each word correctly completed worth a Ten Cents/Pence coupon good at their local grocery store on things a Family might need, or just a generic "Good on any purchase of One (Dollar|Pound) or more" kind of thing.

If the Player saves up their coupons until each level is passed, then the combined coupon might be worth even more than the sum of it's parts.

If they save all the coupons from all the levels & combine them into a single script at the very end, maybe it's worth a free"Family Meal Deal" from the deli (chicken|beef|pork, mashed potatos, salad, drink, & a dessert?), or a bag of groceries (valued at ???), or the like. Something that's an obvious reward they can look forward to earning, winning, & redeeming.

Get it sponsored by your local grocer, advertised on said grocer's website, and into as many hands as possible (Android, Apple, & Windows phones at the very least, Apple, Linux, & Windows desktop clients if possible as well).

Imagine the fun of talking to your phone all day & actually Learning & Earning something from it for a change!

=-D

1
0

Who wants a classic ThinkPad with whizzy new hardware? Lenovo would just love to know

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@James, (3)

You've turned blue?

*Heimlic maneuver*

BREATHE! Breathe you fool!

*Shows you a life sized, holographic, more real than real, image of Borat in his thongkini; smiles at the explosive projectile vomiting*

That's better. Now you can stop immitating a Smurf.

=-)p

*Runs like hell, laughing my arse off*

1
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@James, (2)

Thank you for the confirmation. I plan on calling up Lenovo for a quote in a bit, & I'll browbeat the CSR about the inaccurate data on the site.

The loss of the WLAN card to free up the M.2 slot is an acceptable trade off AFAIC. I've got much more use for the latter rather than the former.

I'd offer a Pint in gratitude but think it might lose something in the trip across the Pond. *Smirk*

1
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@James...

First my appollogies for the inadvertant truncation of your name. I didn't intend to & didn't hear the error until it was too late.

You say your machine *does* have Gigabit LAN? Then I shall have to go kick someone at Lenovo in the head for that bit of misinformation. If they've screwed up on that model, which others have they done likewise?

Part of the reason the single memory slot is such a pain in the butt is that a single channel is a limitation to the total bandwidth the memory can utilize. A dual channel configuration allows a wider data path, faster operations, & a greater efficiency. (Not to mention more RAM.) There's also the fact that the 4GiB of soldered on memory means that bit isn't upgradeable, so if you ever found 12GiB insufficient, you would have nothing as far as an upgrade path. I accept that 12GiB is a lot, is enough for your & most needs, but as the old addage goes "more is better". It's better to have it & not need it than need it & not have it. *Smile*

As for the availability of the specs I desire, you would think so but they seem to be difficult (for me at least) to find. I can find 4th gen i7's of the dual core variety, but no 5th's of the quad core kind. I can find units that accept up to 16GiB of RAM, but mostly on the "Mobile Workstations" which start at a much higher price point than I want to pay. I can find units with SSD's in their CTO options, but most of them are either SATA-1 for ~5x retail price, SATA-3 for ~10x the retail price, and nothing at all in the M.2 super speed form factor.

The reason I believe the hardware would be in such a "Retro ThinkPad" revitalization is because it fits with the concept of Classic ThinkPad build quality, stuffed with modern hardware. Things like 5th gen i3's, i5's, & i7's, four memory slots for up to 32GiB RAM, enough internal space for a RAID of notebook HDD's much less SSD's, SATA-3/M.2 interfaces, a choice of optical drive, additional HDD/SSD, or something else in a modular bay tray, a main battery with a use time of 6~8 hours & an optional battery wedge with a run time of 12+ hours, 4x USB 3.0 ports, SD card reader, ExpressCard slot, Gigabit LAN, WiFi, WLAN option, and a screen resolution that wasn't obsolete over a decade ago.

All those are "modern hardware" that would go quite nicely into a Classic chassis, and if they offered it at a reasonable price then the man from the blog article has over 1,700 commenters expressing interest, plus quite a few here, and $Deity knows how many others on different forums.

For a TL;DR version of my feelings, see the first post under this topic. "Gimmie!" =-D

2
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

oland6, re ISO's.

Thank you for the update! I wasn't aware that Digital River had stopped offering them. *Sigh* Another fine resource flushed down the drain.

I'll update my records & go revisit my archive folder of all the ISO's I've downloaded from D.R. already.

I wonder if I can get a DropBox account & fill it like an FTP site? Hmmmm... *Innocent Whistling*

0
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

ames Cane, Re: What's wrong with the current range?

I looked at the Lenovo product page for that model. The "what's wrong with it?" list is unfortunately not inconsiderate.

1. It has 4GiB of RAM that's *soldered on*, plus a single slot that tops out at an 8GiB stick. Meaning you can only CTO it with 6~12GiB of RAM.

2. It doesn't include an Ethernet Port among those listed, so Gigabit LAN is out unless you buy a dongle.

I stopped there since those two are enough to kill any desire to own one.

Can you recommend a different model that includes at least two memory slots (16GiB is fine, 32GiB is better) and Gigabit LAN?

0
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Dan 55, re: impromptu Signiture Edition.

You can get free Windows ISO's from Digital River, a Microsoft partner whom makes available a very large array of MS operating systems & software suites for free. They can do this because you still need the Licensing Key to activate it, and they sell those. Otherwise it's a MS TechNet listed resource for grabbing the ISO's of the stuff you need.

Swapping a HDD/SSD on a ThinkPad isn't exactly time consuming. A couple of screws, a cable, & call it a day.

The drivers *might* be a problem, but given it's a _ThinkPad_ & well known for being nearly fully supported Out Of The Box for both Windows & Linux, this probably won't be an issue.

Seriously, you can buy the machine from Lenovo with the bare bones RAM & HDD to save money, buy the max ram for cheaper elsewhere, a ginormous SSD cheaper elsewhere, spend the ~HalfHour to make the swaps, & end up with a machine that's damn-near exactly what you want, minus the Direct Neural Interface & Laser weapons.

I _just_ got done speccing out a T440 on the Lenovo site & the software was *very* configurable. Want Adobe, McAffee, Norton, or a host of others? Just tick the appropriate boxes. Don't want them? Don't tick the boxes. YES there's preloaded bloat, and a real Signiture Edition would take care of that, but if you take the time to customize it (outside of Lenovo's ordering page), then a fresh install of the OS of choice does that too.

Sure, I'd love an Official Signiture Edition, as you pointed out it would be easier that way. But failing an official one, it's not _that_ hard to Do It Yourself.

If your time is *SO* precious that you can't spend any of it to make the machine your own, WTF are you doing spaffing it on a comment forum complaining?

*Comical raspberry with thumbs in ears gesture*

0
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Trevor_Pott, re: the Nipple Mouse.

If they included a second one for the Index finger of the other hand, we'd never stop fondeling the machine.

*COUGH*

I'll get my coat, it's the one with the bag of replacement nubs in the pocket.

0
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Dan 55, re Lenovo.

Configure the machine you want with the smallest HDD they offer on that CTO build. Once you get it from them, remove the original drive & stick it in a safety deposit box. Install new, larger, faster SSD & install a fresh copy of whatever you want.

Even though the Business grade machines didn't come with the scumware that the Consumer grade ones did, it still makes sense since you get charged less for the machine, don't ruin the default instal in case you need to send it back in for repair (swap drives & they never know), and you get a clean install of whatever OS you desire.

Sure a Signiture Edition would be nice, but given how easy a ThinkPad is to open up & user upgrade/repair, making your own "Signiture Edition" takes a screwdriver, time, & the intelligence not to stab yourself in the head with the pointy end.

*Grins*

2
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Gritzwally...

You're welcome. Glad I could help.

Oh, and don't forget to have the Official Sacraficial Thumb, Smacky Hammer O' Deific Appeasement, & Container of Blessed Caffeine to make a proper offering to the various Goddesses involved in the process. If you forget Them & they realize it, It Won't End Well. Nope, not at all. We're talking stuff that makes lathering yourself in bacon to read the Necronomicron look like a Good Idea in comparison.

*Cough*

=-D

1
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Gritzwally, re Thinkpads.

Before repartitioning a drive to dual boot, be sure to do the following steps:

1. Image the drive. Use a drive clone/imaging utility to make a mirror of the drive. Once the image has been made, use it to nuke the drive & put the image back. You'll need the working image if anything goes wrong.

2. Once the Restore Image has been verified to work, go ahead & use a LiveCD/DVD of your favorite operating system. This will let you know if the BIOS will behave with that particular OS. If it doesn't work, pick another OS; burning another copy of the same OS might work, but it's a flip of the coin. If it works then go ahead & run the instal utility. Be advised that having Windows on the drive first & adding *Nix is fine, but the other way around tends to ruin the BootLoader; Windows can't be arsed to play nice unless it's another version of Windows, and even then is no guarantee.

3. Once both operating systems are up & working, make a second Restore Image of the dual boot drive. Again, you will need this image later if something goes wonky.

ThinkPads are recognized as playing nice with most *Nix distributions as far as hardware support is concerned, but you still want to make the Images & run the LiveCD/DVD first Just To Be Sure. Nothing makes you tear your hair out in screaming frustration faster than getting halfway through a dual boot install routine & having the system crash because it finds a chip it doesn't like; a chip you would have known about had you bothered to run the LiveCD/DVD first; a situation you would be able to recover from if you had Made The Restore Image & then verified it worked, BEFORE YOU STARTED.

Good luck & happy computing!

5
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Re: ME! Oh ME! MeohmeohmeohMEEEE!

Thank you!

I'll UpVote you just for the battery comment alone. The thinner they make the machine the less room for the battery, and invariably a battery we can't replace. Bullshit! Big, chunky, user replaceable battery that lasts a day on a charge, can be swapped out for a spare while the first recharges on the spare power brick, and lets us Get Shit Done!

HUZZAH!

36
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Gritzwally Philbin, re Thinkpads.

The original ThinkPads were _The_ most respected laptops for Professionals needing to Get Shit Done. It was built like a tank, filled with components that lasted far beyond their competition, and Just Worked. No having to constantly screw with hardware issues, only the occasional software issue, & IBM (the original manufacturer) supported them without question.

Everyone in the corporation from Accountants to the CxO's knew that ThinkPad meant Quality. Uncompromising, unfaultering, No Bullshit, _Quality_.

You could use one to beat the ever loving crap out of a mugger, crush the bastard's skull like an overripe banana, & go right back to work without worrying that the lid hinge might snap, or the ram might unseat, or the HDD would skip.

Like Timex, they took a licking & kept on ticking.

Then IBM sold the ThinkPad brand to Lenovo & it's been a much different experience. The machines are still excellent, they still Get Shit Done, but the tank-like build quality has suffered, they now look more like an aerodynamic blob than a chunky tank, and the issues (both hardware & software) are much more frequent.

The original keyboard was praised as The Best In The Business for years after it was introduced, & the competition scrambled to copy it. The original "Nipple Mouse" (the blue or red "Nipple" between the keys) was an innovative way to move the mouse, and since it was already under the fingertips, a touch typist didn't even have to move the hand positions to operate it. It had a touch pad on some models, but the Nipple Mouse (also called a "Clit Mouse" by some) was just the best.

The Lenovo ThinkPads have since given up the Nipple Mouse in favor of track pads, which many consider a huge step backwards. The keyboard design has been revamped & tweaked, much to the teeth gnashing of those whom felt the change unnecessary. (Don't fix it if it ain't broken.)

Some of the configurations have also made ThinkPad loyalists cringe in horror, as the perception is one of Lenovo trying to flush what was once The apex of a product, into the absolute garbage akin to the competition's race to the bottom.

The "Thin & Light" phase (UltraBook) that everyone seems so eager to do is being done at the expense of ports we need, upgradable memory (the ram is *soldered* on), an inability to upgrade the HDD (so if you didn't get the SSD you wanted to start with, there's no way to replace the drive later), loss of the optical drive, hinges that have gotten so thin they can barely survive the warranty period, & software preloads so full of bloatware that it makes you want to scream.

Many Loyalists have held on to their favorite model for *decades* past it's effective End Of Life, upgrading the OS, hardware, & software to keep it as relative as possible, because the build quality is infinitely better, the keyboard is better, and the thing Just Works and Gets Shit Done.

Read that again. They've kept the machines for a decade or more. A Decade. Do you think that thin & light UltraBook you'll be charged multiple thousands for will still be working in a decade, much less a decade after it's EOL?

So a "Retro Thinkpad", the ThinkPad original tank body & build quality, filled with modern components, at a reasonable price? Sign me up!

It's a machine that would last years, be worth every. last. penny., and Just Work to Get Shit Done.

Hope that helps!

24
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Damn that man's blog!

He wants our feedback, but then runs a Discuss brand commenting subsystem. It uses a CAPTCHA on the registration that isn't Accessible, meaning I have no way of leaving said feedback.

To add insult to injury, I can't find a contact email that I might use to send it to him that way, meaning I have no way to express my desire for a "Retro Thinkpad".

Damn it, I _want_ one! A 5th generation, quad core, i7 with 16GiB of RAM, a 120GiB M.2 SSD, 2x USB3, 2x USB2, Gigabit Ethernet, SDxC card reader with the TeraByte card capability, a DVD burner, and a screen that wasn't obsolete over a decade ago? GIMMIE!

Holy shit, it seems like the only way to get such a machine now is to go the "Mobil Workstation" route, most of which start at nearly Two Thousand Bucks and go up from there. Why? The cpu is the latest & greatest but no longer "new". The RAM is bog standard & "cheap as chips" yet they charge 10x the retail price to install it. They want 5x retail for the SSD, and then have the balls to make it a First Gen SSD at that rather than the Sata3 units out now. Oh, and then the final kick in the crotch is if I want Win7Pro64 on it rather than Win8.x, they want to charge me an extra Fifty Bucks for the "downgrade rights" and not include the recovery media?!? BAH!

Stop screwing us for every last penny, give us components we want at a reasonable price, & we'll fill your coffers with cash in gratitude.

It's why we want the "Retro Thinkpad": a machine built like a tank, able to survive years of abuse, filled with hardware that won't go tits up the first time we look at it funny, at a price that made the purchase a No Brainer even for the Bean Counters.

All these "Thin & Light" jobbies that you've made thinner by removing all the freaking PORTS might make it thinner & lighter, but you've not dropped the price to match. ESPECIALLY if I have to buy a fucking dongle to put back the functions you stripped out in order to make it thin!

See that Gigabit LAN port? Put it back. See all those full sized USB ports? Put them back. See that full sized keyboard? PUT. IT. BACK.

Now shut up, build it, take my money, and GIMMIE!

Gimmiegimmiegimmiegimmie!

27
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

ME! Oh ME! MeohmeohmeohMEEEE!

GIMMIE!

*Flings my money at you*

MineAllMineAllMineAllMine!

...

I, uhh, I mean, umm, I would like one, please.

(Chanting "Gimmie!" repeatedly under my breath)

41
0

China's best phone yet: Huawei P8 5.2-inch money-saving Android smartie

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Ok, all well & good, but...

How does it sound? Does it render voices accurately, clearly, & loudly, or does it muddle them, muffle them, & do all but mute itself in shame?

All the other bits are nice, but if the call quality blows monkey spunk, what's the fekkin' point?

Seriously, it's a phone. Audio quality should be the Number One item on the review list to determine. If it's shit then the rest of it doesn't matter; if it's top notch than other issues can be dealt with. So let us know if it sounds like something we could hear clearly without having to resort to a pair of headphones crammed into our ears, or have to shout at for the other party to hear us, that sort of thing.

<Sarcasm>Don't _MAKE_ me reach through this monitor & flick you in the forehead.</Sarcasm>

*Grin*

16
1

Shadow of the Beast: Amiga classic returns from the darkness

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

GAH! Spoiler Alert!

I'm still trying to finish the bloody thing & you go & spoil the ending!

Just... one... more... try... at... the... waterfall...

NOOOOOOooooo!

*Sobs*

*Restarts for the 19,369,246,735,273,666th time*

2
0

Privacy advocates descend on proposed domain name change

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

It's called DotCom for a bloody reason.

As in Commercial domain, originally intended for businesses enguaged in commerce.

Since anyone & their dog's groomer's aunt's hairdresser's podiatrist's dead cat Wink's Medium can get a DotCom domain for the onorous price of the cost of lunch at the local rolling RoachCoach, that's obviously no longer true.

If you're not taking money from strangers in exchange for goods or services, aka an actual Commercial venture, then by all means keep your privacy. I don't care & don't need to know whom you are, since you don't have access to my financial data.

But if you ARE enguaged in Commerce, then you don't get to remain hidden anymore. I need to know you're a legit vendor whom has records on file where I can freely Copy+Paste them into the Police Report if need be. Not having to obtain an expensive Court Order to force a proxy service to reveal your data, but your data in full view of the public. If you're not willing to be open & up-front with us, then you don't deserve to be doing business with the public. That kind of shady marketer is typicly operating off the boot of the car in the alley behind the Stop-N-Rob at two A.M. with a call of "Pssst. Hey, wanna buy a stereo?"

If you're some persecuted bunch that needs money, there re reputable corporations out there that will collect on your behalf. You register with them to do the collecting, they put their corporate face/rep/ass on the line to do it. If they fuck over the people doing business with them then they have public identifying info that we can use to sue them. You get your cover of anonymity, you get donations, and we get someone whom can have the cops called on them for fraud.

And that's what it all boils down to. You may want to be anonymous, but you ALSO want to be doing business with the public. The Public has the Need/Right To Know whom they're doing business with, and that means real ID contact info for use in a call to the police to file a complaint. No real contact data means you aren't a legit place to do business.

Would you be willing to fork over your cash to the local Chemist if they wore a full face hood to hide their features, a voice masking warbler to make it impossible to identify them by theirs, and removed their address numbers off the front door to try & prevent you from knowing where you were doing business at in the first place?

Because that's what the anonymity of a proxy in the WhoIs data is accomplishing; the Chemist can change the name on the front door, change the hood colour, alter the timber of the voice, & beat the crap out of you for all your cash safe in the knowledge YOU can't ID them to the cops when you want to report it afterwards.

That's why if I intend to do business with someone & there's a proxy in the WhoIs, then I go elsewhere instead. Even if it's just a DBA line with a corporate street address as the WhoIs entry, that's what you list in the Court Filing to sue the shit out of them. A Proxy isn't the Business, and thus can tell you to go fuck yourself with those Filing forms.

5
2

Raising a stink in court: Innocent poo banditry warehousers win $2.2m

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

What a crappy story...

Where's the IT angle? What a load of shit. Someone needs to slap that arsehole of an author.

I'll get my coat, it's the one with the septic-safe liner.

(I don't dare run away, I've already got a case of it.)

16
4

Pint-sized PCIe powerhouse: Intel NUC5i5RYK

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

A bit of info on the NUC...

The "front" has a pair of USB ports & the audio-out/headphone jack. The Power Button is on the top-left corner. All the rest of the ports are on the back opposite the audio.

So if you use it with a VESA mount to stick it to the back of your monitor, invest in a bunch of USB extension cables to make it easier to plug in stuff, or else buy a hub with a nice long cable.

I tried to put it on the back of my monitor (it's used for those few times I need a Sighted Person to tell me what the hell the computer is doing that the Screen Reader can't parse), but because you have to reach around behind like an amorous gorilla, it's not exactly convenient.

Now it sits on my desk on top of the monitor's base, the ports are where I can get at them, & the power button doesn't require dislocating a shoulder to press.

If you leave it on 24/7 & only ever Reboot, then the power button won't matter, but the ability to use the ports needs be taken into consideration.

Get extension cables, a hub with a long cable, or figure to never make a habit of utilizing them at all.

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go drool over that i7 NUC. Mmmmm... Nuckin' Futzy Nuxy!

1
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Filippo Re: Noise?

I'm currently using the 4th gen i5 NUC with 8GiB of RAM & a 120GiB SSD. If the thing were any quieter I'd never know it was on unles/until I got it to do something software-wise that triggered audio output. It's essentially silent but for the faint audio artifacts I can hear through the amplified speakers as it's going through POST.

I want to get one of the new i7's, fill it with 16GiB RAM & one of those blazing fast SSD's. I've already got my OS, I've got my ScreenReader, and I'd have WAY too much fun finding *just* how fast I can render email, write stuff in Notepad, & listen to it beep at me every time it's finished calculating pi.

=-)p

(That last part was called "Sarcasm" just to be sure.)

1
0

DEATH by VEGETABLES: Woman charged with killing boyf using carrots. And peas

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

She'll get off lightly...

She'll tell the Judge she felt he needed more iron in his diet...

I'll get my coat, it's the one with the tin of Chicken Noodle Soup in the pocket.

2
0

Pirate captain blasts Google for its 'mystery' Chrome blob

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Please correct me if I'm wrong...

But if you include a stealth binary with otherwise OpenSource Code, doesn't that mean the binary is treated as OpenSource as well? If that's the case then open that little bastard up, find out exactly what it does, & pimp slap Google for including it at all, much less in secret. If not then I'd still vote to ban Google from making any non-validated-and-verified additions to the project as they have been doing, instead putting a hold on all contributions until/unless the code has been vetted not to pull shit like this.

<Sarcasm>Or you could just run Windows 95, the world's most secure operating system ever!</Sarcasm>

*Runs. Like. Hell*

10
4

MOUNTAIN of unsold retail PCs piling up in Blighty: Situation 'serious'

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Damn you lucky bastadges.

I want a brand new laptop & if the folks on this side of the Pond were in such a position, I might be able to afford to get one.

Quad core, 2GHz, 8GiB RAM, 120GiB SSD, Gigabit LAN, and enough USB ports to make a hub unnecessary. Build quality that can take a few years of constant use, bouncing around in a laptop bag, getting bumped around while on the bus/train/plane, and not drop dead the first time it gets looked at funny. Screen size/resolution don't matter, & integrated GPU is fine since I won't be using the monitor at all. (See my other post about how I normally use a laptop.) All for a price that doesn't break the bank.

Over here I'm looking at nearly a thousand dollars or more for such a beast, and even then I have to trade battery life for a physical DVD burner. Really? Is it *THAT* difficult to fit a slot load DVD drive in that "thin & light", and make it *just* thick enough to include the damned LAN port? Because if I have to plug in an external DVD drive to make that physical backup of the drive, while having a USB LAN dongle plugged in to authenticate to the server, plus the USB keyboard, that bad boy needs four USB ports at a minimum (and the two for the DVD burner will require one to be Powered), else it won't work.

Besides, if I have to buy externals to put back the functionalities you removed to make it "thin & light", then you'd damn-well better drop the price to reflect that. No DVD drive? Chop off the $100 you would charge me if it were there. No LAN port? Then axe the hundred you would charge me for that port. Only a single USB port & it's a Type C connector that requires a specialty plug to interact with? Get out the chainsaw, that price better scream "Timber!" as it falls.

I've been told that I can get used Business Class machines with the specs I want for fairly cheap, but those are usually a generation or two (or more) behind the curve, and there's a REASON why they're USED. Maybe they've been treated like crap by employees whom didn't care since they were "only company property" after all. Maybe the connectors on the mobe are going to shit & while it passed inspection NOW, it won't in the day after the warranty runs out. Or it uses some proprietary chipset that no longer has drivers, which means you can't upgrade the OS from Windows XP even if you wanted to. Or that smell you experience every time it starts to overheat is nothing to be alarmed about, it's just the CPU reaching Critical Mass and waiting for an opportune moment to turn itself into a tiny super nova atop your crotch.

I want a *new* machine, one that I won't have to upgrade for at least five years (hardware wise) or the moment it gets out of the box (software), at a price that only an Apple addict could afford.

Bah.

2
0

Auto-playing video ads? People love auto-playing video ads – Twitter

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Captain Daft re the microwave.

Try not to envision the microwave scene from the movie Gremlins. =-)p

0
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Dear Twitter. Kiss My Ass.

I don't let YouTube auto-play videos to me because I like controlling when/where I listen to said streaming content. It's content I *want* to see but need to make sure it's fully buffered before hitting play as the bandwidth on my Comcast Internet sucks shit. If I allow it to stream then it jitters & pops, pauses & stops, grinding along as if I were back on dial up. So I let it buffer, play it once it's all the way here, and get a better experience.

Your advertisements are *NOT* content I wish to see, ESPECIALLY not if it renders my browsing into an absolutely craptastic experience.

I've got a HOSTS file updated regularly to block ad servers, I run my browser in Paranoid Security Modes to deny most of the ad injection routines, and I block ads as a matter of security. Since *YOU* don't bother to vet your ad suppliers for security & not delivering malicious crap, *I* won't let them on my machine.

I'm not even a Twitter user, I'm _BLIND_ and I can see what a stupid fucking idea that is, and I'll now be determining what method you use to auto-play video to me when I visit someone else's feed. The moment I find it, I'm stripping your ability to force that particular crap down my pipe, and giving you The Finger.

We do NOT like auto-playing videos, we do NOT like ads, and combining the two is not merely shooting yourself in the foot, it's sticking your head in the microwave & nuking whatever was inside your skull that passed for brains.

26
1

Cortana threatens to blow away ESC key

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Terry6 re my feelings.

I tried to but the InterGalactic Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Sentient Beings keeps interdicting my signal & erasing it before I can hit the Submit button.

It's almost as if they're afraid that my desire to have Cortana used as a-

[The screen turns completely black with cool & calming green text that reads "This post has been deleted by the InterGalactic Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Sentient Beings to preserve your sanity. Nothing to see here, please move along."]

1
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@TonyJ re the Escape Key.

The first mention of computers from the page you linked to is in 1984. Wiki claims that the Escape Key was present on TeleType Machines as early as 1849. So to answer your question, Yes. =-)

Not that it matters to me actually (if Toshiba remaps the keyboard) since I use an external USB bog standard Desktop style keyboard even when using a laptop. Given all the permutations, possabilities, mutations, & variations between laptop keyboards, it's not worth the massive migraine it causes me to learn where they've hidden all the bloody keys from machine to machine. Far easier to plug in the external, close the laptop lid (I'm Blind & don't use the screen anyway), lay the keyboard on top, & go on about my merry way. Sure it takes up room in the laptop bag, but since it's one of those roll up, rubber membrane, floppy things it can be literally wadded into a ball & stuffed down into a corner.

Besides, I love listening to folks wonder aloud just what the hell I'm doing when I've got the keyboard on my lap, the laptop still in the bag, & no visible computer nor monitor to interact with. Earbud in the ear to hear the Screen Reader, clicking away on the keys, and laughing to myselves at you poor Sighted Bastards whom need a Screen. Neener Neener Neener. =-)p

12
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

I'll remap that key.

You screw with a bog standard key to install a gimick in it's place, I'll remap it back to what it's been since before your company came into existence.

Oh, and I'll be uninstalling that bitch so fast it'll make her subroutines collapse, because I don't want her, don't need her, & won't touch that rotten twat with a 3.05Meter pole. My desktop doesn't have a microphone attached, webcam, nor any means of you detecting what I'm doing except what I type in on the keyboard. MY keyboard, the one that I paid for. The one with the ESCAPE key that allows me to bring up various Windows systems without having to bounce through the Control Panel or the Start Menu.

So add another key if you like, but don't remove one that is useful for one that is not. It annoys the hell out of us, makes you look like a diseased douchebag, and may make folks avoid your "broken" keyboards.

9
3

BlackBerry on Android? It makes perfect sense

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Re: I'm planning to buy a new washing machine...

You want to get the one with the "Whale Tail" spoiler on the back, the ObnoxiousFartingBastard exhaust modification, spinning rims on Fifty Series tires, neon undercarriage accent lights, racing strips, a triple-barrel Turbo Charger racing air scoop up off the bonnet, Cat Whisker curb feelers at all four corners, about a thousand various "Go Faster" badges to slather around at random, and a stereo system loud enough to deafen dead people at a thousand KM & enough bass to pop them up out of their graves like slices of toast out a particularly feisty toaster.

Don't forget to install the blue beam headlamps aimed at a point designed to blind oncomming drivers, strobing turn indicators in non standard colours & shapes, a scrolling marquis LCD strip across the rear window for sending messages to those poor sods behind you, a pair of Fuzzy Dice off the rear view mirror, a Bobbling Hula Girl statue affixed to the dash, license plate that reads "IGOFAST".

Bonus points for littering the inside with fast food containers, spilled beer, used condoms, various bras & panties, and (fake) feet prints on the ceiling & insides of the windows.

Oh, don't forget the giant red bottles of Nitros in chromed holders in the back window to advertise just how fast you can go, & a Big Red Button on the dash marked "NITRO!"

(None of it has to actually WORK, it just has to LOOK cool.)

You'll want the most bleeding-edge release of the car-to-car communications suite, complete with dodgy code that randomly reboots your car for no apparent reason, broadcasts your PII to everyone in a KM via WiFi, and constantly phones home to (Insert ThreeLetterAgency of choice) to let them know just what a naughty Chav you've been.

You want the Siri integration so you can spend your driving attention screaming at the dash trying to get the tart to stop playing endless mash up loops of Adam Sandler's "Piece of Shit Car", rather than paying attention to where you've aimed the car.

Oh, and don't forget to install plenty of cup holders. Gotta have cup holders. Chromed, with neon accent lights, that auto-chill the beverage & send an SMS to your phone when it's reached the optimum temperature to turn your crotch into a puddle of molten flesh no longer capable of Reproduction.

Ahhhh Darwinism, gotta love it!

=-)p

1
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Keep making physical keyboards!

BB has always been geared to Professionals whom need to Get Shit Done rather than fashionistas whom flock to the newest & shiniest toy to hit the shelves. Don't try to be another Apple, stick to what made you great in the first place. A BB device, even if it runs some custom flavor of Android, will continue to sell to Professionals as long as it retains that physical keyboard. It's distinctive, it says "This is not a toy, it's a tool, and I'm a Professional whom knows how to use it."

If you want to make a touch screen only keyboard model go ahead, but don't make it your flagship. Save that spot for the form factor & design that made you great. High end specs, user replaceable battery, dual SIM slots, an SD Card slot, good speakers, voice commands, & that physical keyboard will all blend together with BB10 to set BB apart from every other landfill device on the market. Go with that. Run with that. Make the most of it.

Make it & we will buy it. Make it inexpensive & we'll not only bring BB up off the shoals of profitability but launch your butt into orbit on a tongue of incandescent flame.

There are many people out there whom would buy a BB device if it had a physical keyboard, if for no other reason than there doesn't seem to be any competition in Android devices that have one. Touch screens are fine if you're a media consumer, not if you're a Professional whom needs to Get Shit Done. Email, meeting notes, calendar appointments, marking up schematics to collaborate in manufacturing, and all the other things that a physical keyboard will make infinitely easier for someone whom needs to GSD rather than fap about with a flaky touch screen keyboard that keeps thinking your touching one letter means you meant another; no, that physical letter button is the one I pressed, it's the one I meant, and oh look, it's the one that appeared on the screen. How quaint, a physical keyboard that Just Works and lets us GSD.

So build it with a physical keyboard, slap a BB10 hardening layer on Android, & give me one. You'll have my money as soon as the phone hits my hand.

9
3

DON’T add me to your social network, I have NO IDEA who you are

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@A.C. re email rules.

I sent it to the spammer's UpStream Provider (USP) instead.

It generally takes about 2~3 days worth of the USP getting flooded to get the offender stomped on, & then the spam stops, at least from them.

It's even funnier when folks try to sign you up for stuff to get you email-flooded with spam, but none of it ever reaches your in box because Gmail correctly shunts it all into the Spam folder. Since I only check it maybe once a week, it's amazing how many pages of emails turn out to originate from the same set of IP's. Which then gets turned into an email rule to auto-forward to the USP, and kills that avenue of spam. Sure the twits find new places to subscribe you, but those sites tend to use the same/similar data in the headers... which gets an email rule, auto-forwarded to USP, spam killed.

It's like playing Whack-A-Mole but with a hammer that kills off hundreds at a stroke.

*Moons the spammers & spanks myself at them in taunting derrision*

=-)p

2
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Re: Oh yes!

I would buy a mouse JUST so I could click that FOAD button like a crazed OCD crack addict playing Cookie Clicker during a speed rush.

7
0

Microsoft says its latest, dodgy Windows 10 build is good for (almost) everyone

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

To quote General Akbar, "It's a Trap!"

Wait, wrong story. *Cough*

On a semi-serious note I think I'll wait until the day before the free upgrade period expires before upgrading, and even then it will be a download of the ISO so I can apply it to a fresh drive rather than nuking my current copy of W7Pro64.

I'll have to buy a second SSD (oh darn!), get a Sighted Minion to push the keys until it gets to where I can install my copy of Jaws, but once the ScreenReader is running I'll take care of the rest.

I don't dare "upgrade in place" over the top of what works, because if it decides to glitch & go all FUBAR then I'll have nothing to which I can roll it back.

So I'll wait for as many of the bugs & dumbfuckery to get ironed out before I grab my upgrade, and even then it'll go on a different drive entirely.

/the General walks away shaking his head in dismay...

6
2

Microsoft to Linux users: Explain yourself

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

To quote General Akbar, "It's a Trap!"

It's the classic Microsoft strategy of Extend, Embrace, & Euthenize.

If you take that outstretched hand thinking it's of friendship, don't blubber about being blindsided when it wraps around your throat & strangles you into a cooling corpse.

You've been warned time & time again. Don't fall for it.

Or to quote another movie, "Run away! Run away!" </Monty Python Ordinary Rabbit scene>

33
8

NY, Connecticut investigate Apple for Music service violations

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Apple sucks schweaty monkey bung.

No particular reason, I just felt like finding out how fast the Apple Fans will-

*Strangled scream, bonking noises, hammering sounds, various construction noises, pleads for mercy, & the bleating of a goat*

No Carrier.

6
4

Remake, remodel: Toshiba Chromebook 2

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

What's a "Chomebook"?

Is that anything like a Chromebook, or is the lack of an "R" an indication it's not for Pirate consumption?

*Runs away*

3
1

Oh, shoppin’ HELL: I’m in the supermarket of the DAMNED

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@AC Re: Some Dutch shops..

I remember a local grocery store here in the States that installed those machines. It was awesome & really helped speed things up. The Check Out person only had to make sure it all went smoothly, could chat with you wile swiping your stuff over the scanner & weighing those bits that needed it, and then leave the cash up to the machine.

The problem came when drunks started vomiting (and in one case urinating) into the funnels. It would then require closing the check out lane, decontaminating the machine, sterilizing the money, & a day or two of Therapy for the poor Check Out person.

The store ended up removing the funnel machines & made their Checkers back into Cashiers again, much to the dismay of the employees & customers alike. (Nobody gave a damn about the drunks in the first place.)

I especially enjoyed the machines because it would spit out anything it didn't believe was proper currency. Coin-like object it can't recognize? *Spit* Bill-like object it can't recognize? *Spit*

You would then look at the "Coin" in the Change Cup & wonder "What the hell? It looks like a (Penny|Nickle|Dime|Quarter) to me!", pick it up, & realize some cheap bastard has given you something from a Foreign Country. "What the hell? Where the fuck is Dumfukistan anyway? GAH!" Then you'd have to search your pockets for more money, sheepishly appollogize to everyone in line behind you, profusely thank the Good Samaritan whom donated a Real Coin you needed, & then scurry as fast as possible from the store before you died of embarrassment...

Which would happen anyway because you forgot to wear underwear with those pants that had the holes in the bum. Nothing says "Freak!" like mooning folks as you're shopping for pet food, baby food, adult & baby diapers, Preparation H & Orajel (an oral numbing agent for teething babies), and tubs of butter...

Ahhh the memories. =-)pwith the

5
0

Everything old is new again: Man mugged in New York, only this time for his Bitcoins

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@NK re BitCoin.

Wow, that sucks schweaty monkey balls.

Thanks for the info, it's helped me solidify why I don't deal in BitCoin (or any other CryptoCurrency) for my own use: if you have zero recourse to get it back once stolen, you might as well just use cash. You can't get the cash back either, but at least the cops don't look at you funny if you say some crook just robbed you at gunpoint of all your Cash.

3
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Please foregive my ignorance in this but...

But isn't one of the means of transfering BitCoin from one account to another a way to verify the transfer? As in, if Bob sends some to Suzy & Suzy claims never to have gotten them, can't Bob verify that they did in fact get deposited to the account she specified?

I thought there was a story not too long ago about some major heist of BitCoins that was able to be tracked down to where the BC were eventually (stored? like an account?) that proved the "new owners" were in possession of the stolen BC. If that's possible then why doesn't the victim simply log in to his BitCoin Manager & find out what account they were sent to? Post that account number & the BC identification numbers (hash tags?) to the BC community that the coins were stolen, went to $Account, and anyone running across BitCoins### should flag the "owner" of those coins as dealing in stolen property.

I am not knowledgeable of BitCoin because I don't care to traffic in them, have nothing to spend them on, and my computer isn't fast enough to mine them in anything considered a reasonable amount of time. (It's not quite as slow as that Punch Card story the other day, but only because mine actually uses silicon based Integrated Circuits instead. Snort)

I don't think much of them one way or the other, just that they're not for me right now. I don't denounce them as worthless either, but mainly because they have the capacity to become a much more powerful resource. So my current lack of knowledge is due to focusing on other things rather than BitCoin.

Which is why I ask. If there's any way to trace to whom recieved the BC from the victim, can't that data trail be followed to find the criminals?

0
0

FBI: Apple and Google are helping ISIS by offering strong crypto

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Dear ThreeLetterAgencies. Fuck You.

Anyone willing to give up Liberty for Security has already lost & shall have neither.

I refuse to give up my Liberty for your false sense of security, so you can just fuck off.

I'll be the Bastard using 1TeraBit Encryption on my damned grocery lists if that's what it takes to make it harder for you to violate my Right To Privacy.

So see this gesture? It's me growing new appendages with which to Flip You Off.

41
0

SourceForge sorry for adware, promises only opt-in in future

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

. too late.

The "easily avoidable" crapware wrappers were *not* & often didn't include (Clear|Obvious|Any) means of declining the wrapped bits to get to the program you thought you had downloaded.

The Gimp Project had not only stopped using SourceForge, but SF's editors were actively scraping the Gimp's other repository to "update" the SF version of the Gimp's page, in clear violation of both the SF & Gimp's ReleaseLicense format.

Then SF locked out the actual owner of the Gimp's SF page so there was no way to update the page to say "If you're looking for Gimp, don't get it from here!"

Folks have been complaining about the crapware wrappers on SF for years. FireZilla (the FTP client from Mozilla) agreed to let the installer be wrapped in a "revenue sharing" plan, and despite all the uproar from the folks that couldn't decline the crap-wrap, SF continued to infect the files.

This situation has been going on at SF for years & the *ONLY* reason they're backpeddling now is because they did it to an "abandoned" project that wasn't, was no longer maintained on the SF site, & the real coders got it splattered all over the Media to prove what lying sacks of bullock sweat SF has been all this time.

I (and plenty of others) have rightly avoided SF like the plague for years because of this crap. Their site's UI makes determining which "Download Me" link is the one for the program you're there to get rather than the adware they're trying to ram down your throat. The wrapped crapware means SF is profiting off the hard work of others whom are *already* paying SF to host the files. SF's causing damage to the reputations of the coders whom have possibly created awesome programs, but nobody can find that out because the crappy wrapper gets the files flagged as malicious by antivirus/antimalware programs.

So don't use SourceForge. If you absolutely can't find the file anywhere else, be sure to scan the hell out of it before running it, & make *EXTREMELY* sure to uncheck any third party software install attempts.

SF has already burnt their Good Will, blown up the bridge, & flushed it's reputational corpse down the toilet. That stench your smelling now is just the putrifaction seeping up through the intertubez.

42
0

IT-savvy US congressmen to Feds: End your crypto-backdoor crusade

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

@Dan1980...

I'll give them the combo if they want it: it's 1... 2... 3... 4... 5.

It's the same as my luggage!

*Cough*

On a more or less serious note, that's why I use a 1Tb encryption hash. It gives them something to do & makes it *really* funny when they find out the file it was used to encrypt amounts to "To Do. Change the passkeys on all my encryption. They've just broken the old one. Hi Guys!"

=-)p

11
0
Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

There's a simple way to explain it to them...

"If I build the lock with a way to open it other than the key I provide to the customer whom buys the lock, then *anyone* with that spare key can open that lock. So if I make a lock & give it more than one set of keys, a second set that could bloom to as many sets as there are users on the internet, would you REALLY like me to install that lock on your daughter's Chastity Belt? Because she'll be just as fucked as everyone else whom uses that brand of lock, knowing every bastard on the planet could potentially have the spare key."

Watch how fast the bastard backpeddles on wanting that backdoor installed & try not to laugh too hard at the smoke blowing, hand waving, "That'll never happen! We're the Government & we're Secure!" style bullshit starts to flow out their mouths.

Idiots, the majority of them. At least we've got one or two with a brain they've got the balls to use in our defense. The rest of them need to go up against the wall when the Revolution comes.

23
3

So, EE. Who IS this app on your HTC M9s sneakily texting, hmm?

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

Just wondering...

1. Does anyone have their Contract handy to go over & search for where it says you've agreed to such conditions? If your contract does NOT, in fact, state that your phone will contain such "security" then return the machine as compromised & *KEEP RETURNING IT* until they provide one that isn't thusly "enhanced".

2. I'd like to know what would happen if someone over there went into a store to buy such a handset, got right up to the point of handing over the cash, & then asked quite plainly "Does this phone contain any software that contacts a corporation outside of the EU?" If they say no then pimp slap the putz with a copy of this article & call them liars to their face. Bonus points for handing copies of the article to all the other customers on your way out. If they say that it does, ask *exactly* whom it contacts, why it does so, what data it transmits, & how it pertains to your Privacy Laws governing the dissemination of PII. If they can't or won't answer, slap them with the article & call them something nasty.

3. If you already have one of these phones, is it possible to return it to the store & ask them to remove the unwanted software? If you claim that the application keeps locking up the phone & stopping it from sending/receiving text/calls & you want it removed, then wouldn't they have to remove the broken software or else replace the unit as defective? Because I'd stand there at the counter, unwrap the fresh phone right there in front of them, fire it up & see if that app tried to phone home. Sudden appearance of a text message in the outbox you can prove you didn't make? Oops, sorry but that's a Defective Device & I'll need another one. Lather, rinse, repeat. Until they either provide you with a phone that doesn't do it or they refund all your money &

tell you to GTFO of the store.

Don't mind me, I'm just a Creatively Vindictive Bastard & would love to be on that side of the Pond so I could make some poor CounterSchmuck's life a little miserable by making them admit that the phone is compromised, they're screwing us over, and we can either Like It Or Fuck Off.

0
1

Free Windows 10 upgrades from Microsoft will FLATTEN PC sales

Shadow Systems
Bronze badge

"to fall by -6.2%"?

If it falls by a negative number, does that mean it goes up instead?

I'll get my coat, it's the one with the basic math skills in the pocket. =-)p

57
0

Page:

Forums