280 posts • joined Wednesday 25th July 2007 22:24 GMT
"I've not seen any office software that floats my boat."
Have a look at Kingsoft Office from Google Play - not too bad, and also free.
Peak Apple: First 'profit slip' in a decade
Oh dear..... how sad..... what a pity........ never mind.
Re: Forty three feet! Golly.
"... London, Bangkok and New York, Shanghai and Mumbai will be among a number of cities which will eventually end up below sea level ..."
And this is a bad thing?
Re: Pork holster.
"I then retrieved from between Christie's buttock, two clear baggies containing a large amount of a crystal substance."
Was it crack?
.....Ison was shaping up to be "potentially spectacular"
Even more spectacular when it lands in the Pacific.
Re: Pics or it didn't happen
Fuck me, I almost suffocated and all I did was look at the photos.
"Great! So the whole of coast of Essex and Norfolk will be OK while the rest us rush down to JJB Sports to get our trunks and water wings sorted!"
You'd best get a move on then JJB are going tits up.
Re: ACTIVATING REALITY DISTORTION FIELD...
"There's nothing wrong with the way Apple Maps represents the world. You're just looking at the world in the wrong way."
Didn't think iPhone users needed maps, I assumed they just blindly follow everyone else.
It's a trap I tells yer....
The more people who get on line, the easier it is to keep track on everybody.
My aren't we posh then using a finger for handwriting searches, I suppose you wear lingerie too don't you? Google voice search not good enough for you now eh? Well let me tell you. When I were a lad, if you wanted to search for summat, you got your arse down to the local library and bleedin well looked for it in the Encyclopaedia Britannica. Kids today, they don't know they're born.
Re: not sure what your on
No need to lie - during certain hours 8PM - 12AM usually, it slows down big style - I check it from time to time with Broadband Speed checker web-site. Normal surfing isn't affected but downloads and my Usenet connection is. Most other times it's acceptable but never the 10Mb I pay for.
" Virgin customer with traffic management applying during peak times could theoretically download 87 GB of data over a 24-hour period"
Theoretically maybe. In real life total bollocks - on my 10Mb connection downloads and general surfing slows down to a crawl between certain hours. I'm lucky to get 1.5Mb most days.
Re: Ye Typo
"But nonetheless, those of us who grew up in t'north some years ago still use thee and thou, thy and thine... and also occasionally the old 'st' endings: dost thou? Canst thou?
"Don't thee thou me lad; I'll tell thee when thee can thou me!""
Aye lad, you tell 'em. I use all of those (old Yorkshire fart that I am) as well as hast (has thou - have you).
Re: Not the sharpest tool in the box
Noticed that he called himself `Dillo` in his apology post - shouldn't that be dildo?
Re: Help ma Boab!
Yes I know, that's why I said IMAGINE that in a Glasgow accent - management speak is bad enough on it's own but Glasgow Gorbals Gobbledygook? Good grief.
Help ma Boab!
"It [mobile phone solution] allowed the council to try the concept of a mobile solution and demonstrate some frontline benefits, but it requires a larger back office support to run with back office staff taking verbal information from the operative and inputting into back office systems," Allan Barclay, service manager for building services at Fife, told Guardian Government Computing.
"The full solution would capture data inputted direct from the frontline device capturing job info and time management and removing the need for manual involvement."
They even speak management shite in Bonny Scotland - if that crock of shit isn't bad enough, imagine it in a Glaswegian accent.
@sharing is stealing
Pity you think like that, I was going to offer you half of my ham sandwich - don't think I'll bother now.
What sort of sadistic twisted mind comes up with an idea like The Phantom Menace: The Musical ?
Was he/she dropped on their head as a baby? Did they suffer abuse and bullying in childhood? Whatever it was, I've never in all my years, countenanced such diabolical evil as this.
Justin Bieber as Aniken Skywalker? Oh, the humanity!
Re: Escape from the Isle of Man
Or..... as an alternative, give them all a back-pack apiece containing a map and some sort of weapon and set them off against each other Battle Royale style.
Re: Best way to get to sleep...
"Good shout, but think I'd need more material than 30 minutes each week, on a 6 week on/off cycle that the News Quiz operates on..."
That's why I have around 150 downloaded podcasts of The News Quiz and the Now Show stored on the MP3 player.
Yeah, I know... I'm a sad bastard but at least not a sad bastard with insomnia. :)
Best way to get to sleep...
1 - cheap MP3 player with in-ear bud type earphones.
2 - load said player with talk type programs (I use News Quiz podcasts)
3 - play chosen program with MP3 player set to turn off automatically after 30 minutes
4 - close eyes and nod off
5 - get up for piss around 5:00AM
6 - repeat steps 3 and 4
@ A 31
"instant coffee is disgusting, stick to tea ... saying that, tassimo is not that good, where is Nespresso ??? far superior coffee, and no plastic (the Nespresso tubs recycle far better)"
Pfftt! I spit on them all.... you can't beat a bean to cup coffee machine and medium/dark roast LaVazza coffee beans.
We need more tits...
Do we know this woman is still a virgin because she's got Ed Zachary disease? i.e. Her face is Ed Zachary like her arse.
No photos to check?
"Our little satellite planet? No. The Moon orbits planet Earth, so it is a moon. Planets orbit the sun. Moons orbit planets. Once it was blown out of earth orbit and shot out across space it still wasn't orbiting the sun, so I guess it became a sodding great asteroid.
Still not a planet."
They ought to set you on as main script-writer for the new series because of your insight into planetary (sorry asteroidal) propulsion systems.
All well and good
But what are they like as bloody phones? Can you actually make and receive calls with them with decent reception?
It's a phone for fuck's sake - te-le-phone. An instrument that converts voice and other sound signals into a form that can be transmitted to remote locations and that receives and reconverts waves into sound signals. They don't need fancy additions and gadgets IMO - talk about over-egging the pudding.
"Fortunately, designers like Jon inspire to create products that anyone can use and make them as practical as possible. "
Even these typical fanbois.
will it be before Apple claim to have a patent on the technology?
to stop computer hackers placing a pad of soft clay on a seat such as those in the company cafe, inviting the chosen computer user/victim to sit down for a cup of tea (say) then using the bumprint to fashion a pair of fake buttocks out of latex or somesuch rubber substitute, donning the aforementioned latex buttocks and waiting for the computer user to leave before commandeering his PC?
Rise of the machines
This is the beginning of the word-wide domination of computers over mankind. This car clearly made an attempt to kill the car's occupant but it's limited (for now) intelligence and computing capacity made it fail in the attempt. Connecting it to an analyser merely allowed it to access another PC and no doubt the interweb so that it could learn from it's mistake.
Trevor Pot wants to watch his step from now on.
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