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* Posts by jubtastic1

961 posts • joined 11 May 2006

Win 8 user? Thought that was a CAPTCHA? R is for ruh roh

jubtastic1
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WTF?

Re: " Windows is a fundamentally broken design and it will *never* be secure."

Does Linux allow you to run a remote executable direct from the browser then? Because OS X doesn't. I can't even imagine what was going through their minds when they thought that typing 'R' in a browser pop up was a useful shortcut for 'execute whatever follows', I'm guessing it was Vodka, should have been a brick.

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Brit fantasy artist sues James Cameron over Avatar world

jubtastic1
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Stop

I hope not

Even though its arguably derivative, the idea that Mr Dean now owns rights to any works that include nods to his artwork, no matter the medium, is ridiculous.

I was a fan of his work in my youth but I think he should sit down and watch the "Everything is a Remix" series, for some perspective.

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Microsoft's MoodScope app predicts smartphones users' feelings

jubtastic1
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Big Brother

tail -9 /nsa/msft/w8p/826381.log

20131105212347-Debug-High pulse rate detected.

20131105212349-Debug-Agressive keystrokes detected.

20131105212401-WARN-KWD.

20131105212408-WARN-KWD.

20131105212412-WARN-KWD.

20131105212413-WARNING! Sensor damage.

20131105212413-WARNI

### host lost ###

SWAT dispatched at 20131105212414

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Schwarzenegger says 'I'll be back' for Terminator 5 reboot

jubtastic1
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Thumb Up

Re: I need a vac-ay-shun

So long as they're produced to the standards of Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad I'd rather have them as TV miniseries anyway, The Matrix (there's a film that deserves a sequel), could have easily been stretched into an awesome 10 parter, basically any film that leaves you wanting to know more about the characters or setting has the potential for a quality miniseries.

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Live or let dial - phones ain’t what they used to be

jubtastic1
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Happy

Re: My mother

I have one too, wife bought it for me as a present a few years ago, it's cream, exactly like the one my folks had when I was a nipper, great rIng and the kids hate using it which keeps the bills down.

Press 1 for blah isn't fun though, some of those systems take ages to time out and pass you on to a human.

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British lord sets new world electric vehicle speed record

jubtastic1
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Trollface

Re: Two rich dudes on el reg ...

A small sample yet representative all the same.

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iOS7 headshaking interface revealed

jubtastic1
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WTF?

FFS

It's in the accessibility options, all of which are geared towards variously disabled users, this one is clearly specifically designed to allow people that can only move their fucking eyes to control a fixed in place device.

But for some reason it's all 'bastard Apple up to its old tricks again' in here.

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Ex-inmate at Chinese prison: We made airline headsets

jubtastic1
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Thumb Down

Oh yes it is

Prison Labour is a bad thing, it creates a conflict of interest, are you rehabilitating prisoners or running a business? Same goes for private prisons in general, as soon as prisoners become part of a profit formula, abuse becomes inevitable.

Like in the story, or that other one from the states where they were bribing a judge to convict juveniles.

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Using encryption? That means the US spooks have you on file

jubtastic1
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Big Brother

Re: Steganography?

A long time ago on an internet far far away I was an Admin on the forum for a MMOG, we had a spate of users leaking secure bits of the forums via screen-grabs, so I replaced the forums 'reply' button, an icon of a document on a blue button, with a PHP script that produced an image that was identical save for the users forumID and IP address being encoded in the dots representing words on the icon. Nobody noticed the difference and because the reply icon was above and below each post it was likely to end up on a screen grab.

A separate script decoded the cropped icons from screen-grabs and coped with jpeg compression just fine to reveal the user.

\o for Pacifica

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Flash flaw potentially makes every webcam or laptop a peephole

jubtastic1
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Re: Surprise! > Chrome

Chrome on Mac requires 10.6 and up, there are a lot of old PPC machines still running 10.5

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Boffins find evidence Atlantic Ocean has started closing

jubtastic1
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Pint

If this is indeed true

Then we should proceed with my plan to move Great Britain to the safety of the Mediterranean post haste.

Stage 1: Build a new motorway carving a straight line from Lands end to john o groats.

Stage 2: load Scotland into dumper trucks, use the rubble to build a causeway into the sea at lands end.

Stage 3: Snake causeway around France and through the straights of Gibraltar consuming GB from the top down as we go.

Stage 4: create a new donut shaped landmass in the Mediterranean, effectively annexing the entire sea.

Stage 5: Relax on the beach for a job well done, txt 'told you so' to Norway as they sprout volcanos.

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Nearly-transparent screen adds solar charge to phones

jubtastic1
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Meh

Re: How about

I was thinking the same, a kinetic charger seems more suited to a device that's usually being bounced around in dark pockets, I suspect the problems with that idea are a) insignificant unless user is sat on a washing machine during spin cycle, b) mechanical wear and tear and c) shifting balance point in an expensive fragile device that's designed to be lightly cradled in the hand during use. I suppose the charging motion looking like a wanking gesture won't be a big sales point either.

When Apple released the original iPhone running Unix with limited CPU, RAM and disk I hoped that we might see a resurgence in efficient optimised code but sadly we decided to fuck all that and throw Ghz, cores and ram at the problem instead, rendering these ambient charging efforts as little more than gimmicks

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Crusading lawmen want more details on Apple's iOS 7 'Activation Lock'

jubtastic1
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It's just a standard activation prompt

That's recieved a reply from Apple's servers that the unique hardware ID has already been used, reported lost/stolen and has been locked out. The system can be run/activated on the servers regardless of what happens to the phone.

If people manage to break the system by presumably editing the unique hardware ID then I'd expect this to manifest itself as users of brand new phones complaining that their phone must be second hand as the activation prompt is telling them it's been lost.

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KEEP CALM and Carry On: PRISM itself is not a big deal

jubtastic1
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Big Brother

It's a big deal

Realtime collection of all communication metadata, while the comms content itself is mandated by law to be stored by the companies involved for ever increasing periods of time.

STEP 1) Government knows everything about everyone. [x]

STEP 2) Elect the wrong people [inevitable]

STEP 3) Horrific Dystopia. [ ]

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Leaks point to new mystery Macs 'with Jony Ive's fingerprints on'

jubtastic1
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Pint

Re: Misleading

To be fair, his fingerprints are definetly going to be all over any new Macs because designing them is his job, that would be a bit 'Pope confirmed as a Catholic' as headlines go though*

*Or is he?, Athiests can be good? bears using portaloos[citation required], it's starting to look a little end of the world is nighish

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Firefox OS: Go away fanbois, fandroids - you wouldn't understand

jubtastic1
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Re: I do understand.

"Is there any particular reason why a Firefox phone should be any cheaper than a budget Android?"

Yes, no need for a JavaVM and vastly simplified OS will mean lower hardware requirements.

The problem as I see it is that any app made for Firefox OS is going to need trivial tweaking (or none at all), to run on all the other mobile platforms, so it's going to be hard to obtain the fabled 'killer app' that draws customers to the platform.

I also note that iOS and ChromeOS both launched with webapps only and both quickly added support for native apps due to developer and user demand, I expect the same will happen here assuming it takes off at all.

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How Microsoft shattered Gnome's unity with Windows 95

jubtastic1
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Re: Apple didn't invent those

Not Xerox, they didn't have menubars back then, and title bars were buttonless and clearly the inspiration for BeOS, I suppose it's possible that someone other than Apple created them but it seems unlikely that there's anything out there with those features that predates Xerox.

How about drag and drop, or being able to browse the filesystem? filetypes? updates to background / obsured windows? The thing about obvious ideas is that they commonly only become obvious the moment after someone has created them, there are billions of obvious ideas out there right now that represent untold fame and riches, realising them and making them work is hard, being labelled 'obvious' later is essentially the hallmark of fantastic ideas.

I guess I just find it disparaging when a whole load of original work is written off simply because it uses the windows and mouse concept from Xerox, the Apple developers didn't leave there with disks and code, just the basic idea, the concepts they added which have spread to all GUI's should be recognised just as much as the work of Xerox's developers in creating the basis of the modern GUI.

Back to the article, regarding NextStep , I recall a whole bunch of Docklets being ported over when OS X was first previewed, which were basically active notification icons, clocks, volume control, CPU usage, weather etc, most of these had menus attached to launch or change something, they fell out of favour so most of them are long gone but some degree of this remains in OS X with unread mail counts on the Mail.app icon, date on the Cal app etc.

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Kettle 'which looks like HITLER' brews up sturm in a teacup

jubtastic1
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IT Angle

Shave and a haircut

It doesn't take much to suggest Hitler, a circle, arc of hair at the top right and the moustache is all that's required, this Kettle goes the extra distance by adding a Southpark style shirt, thin black tie and the salute.

It looks a bit like Hitler, it's mildly amusing, Photographer deserves a bonus for turning a run of the mill kettle into a sell out item.

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Tim Cook: Wearable tech's nice, but Google Glass will NEVER BE COOL

jubtastic1
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Mushroom

Same old same old

'An iPod? good luck with that you fucking muppets'

'iPhone? dumbPhone more like, they'll be lucky to sell a dozen'

'WTF It's just a big iPhone with a retarded name, netbooks are the future'

'A fucking watch? what a lame ass last century idea'

Only a matter of time for the comments about how after a good start Apple are now losing smartwatch marketshare and anyway the next rumoured iProduct is a stupid idea that no one in their right mind would want.

Sent from my iSofa

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PC market facing worst-ever slump in 2013

jubtastic1
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Stop

Semantics

The PC market is doing just fine, desktops and laptop sales are down, smartphone and tablet sales are up, won't be long until tablets are recognised as PC's (personal computer for those that have forgotten), and all will be right again. At least until the next evolution of the PC comes along and once again is excluded from the definition. Are hosted virtual computers included yet? because they will be later.

Some people need Desktops, some people need laptops, others get by with a phone and/or tablet, some need whole rooms filled with servers, others prefer virtualised PC's, some just need a browser. A percentage of the market will always prefer something that doesn't exist yet and will switch from one of the above when it arrives.

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Boffins' brilliant plan: CONCRETE COMPUTERS

jubtastic1
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Trollface

Re: Concrete form

2001 called, they want their monolithic computer back.

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Hot new battery technologies need a cooling off period

jubtastic1
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Trollface

Re: What we need is...

Cars with braided steel moustaches that spark along tracks in the road, automated travel and a small onboard battery used for parking / getting it out of the way when it breaks down / driving back to the track when it spins off at hairpins.

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Iran fingered for attacks on US power firms

jubtastic1
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Holmes

I would have assumed

That they would board up their glass before they started throwing stones.

But that isn't the case, which implies that either they're complete fools, or It's bait.

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Dialog Bluetooth chip boasts battery life of four YEARS

jubtastic1
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Flame

IR

I like IR, Its durable, there's no protocol involved and its easy to replace a lost remote with a cheap universal one.

I'd rather have a programmable IR transmitter on my phone than a bluetooth solution for remote control of my stuff.

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Google releases Glass' roots, warns it may turn specs to bricks

jubtastic1
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Childcatcher

Re: I'm still baffled ...

Star-Trek cosplay, resistance is futile btw.

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Experts: Network security deteriorating, privacy a lost cause

jubtastic1
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The problem is that our devices are too easily subverted by unexpected inputs.

No one would accept a washing machine that could be reprogrammed simply by a malformed laundry load (unmatched sock), computers need to get to the same place.

We shouldn't be in a situation where every web facing app has to recreate the wheel, some degree of validation needs to happen by the underlying system before anything gets to see the bits.

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The BOFH is BACK: And it's cloudy with a 90% chance of beatings

jubtastic1
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Facepalm

Re: Never received it....

re: deleted items as a store

I had a call once from a user that used the system trashcan as his documents folder, he called me in a panic because he'd emptied it due to finally running out of space, no backups, I wonder how some people get through each day without maiming themselves.

I've also pencilled 'space' on the spacebar for a user that was struggling with the concept. She was thankful at the time but in retrospect, it's probably why she never called again.

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Google slashes App Engine NoSQL data storage prices by 25 per cent

jubtastic1
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Reaping

I think Amazon are about to learn what it's like to have a competitor whose ok with running at a loss so long as they put you out of business.

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LOHAN is GO! Reg spaceplane BLASTS OFF on 14 September

jubtastic1
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Thumb Up

Re: Re: Did you just put the mockers on LOHAN?

That put a big grin on my face, love the attitute, break a leg chaps.

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More than half of Windows 8 users just treat it like Windows 7

jubtastic1
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Re: OK. What's wrong with XP? - Re: Flash

My main desktop doesnt (can't) run flash, I've noticed that HTML5 playback is gaining ground now, used to be that you'd get it on mobile/tablets while the same page on a desktop would insist you used flash, but HTML5 playback options are appearing.

My advice is that even if your system can run flash you should uninstall it, use a flash less browser for everyday and keep chrome around for the sites that insist upon it.

With no mobile support Flash is dying on its arse, and every browser that runs without it hastens its departure from the desktop.

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The bunker at the end of the world - in Essex

jubtastic1
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Mushroom

Worth a visit

Interesting to explore and easy to laugh at the dioramas but the reality behind this building is pretty sobering. Grim is an understatement, Its poorly lit, cold and musty with an undercurrent of rot.

Hard to imagine what it would have been like to be shut in down there as blasts shook the ground and the world died above you.

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IBM puts supercomputer Watson to work in ROBOT CALL CENTRE

jubtastic1
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Terminator

Re: Here's one to try:

It will respond 'no', there's no divide by zero in that question.

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jubtastic1
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Thumb Up

Re: This was posted by someone in another article

Haven't finished it yet but really enjoying this story, thanks for the link, have an upvote.

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Jailed Romanian hacker repents, invents ATM security scheme

jubtastic1
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Thumb Up

Re: Chip n Pin

Or allow us to order a card without a stripe, come to think of it, I could erase the stripe myself and not have to worry about ATM skimmers again (UK, it's all C&P here).

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Hey, Teflon Ballmer. Look, isn't it time? You know, time to quit?

jubtastic1
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Stop

He's a genius

Most people would have folded after the Vista fiasco, but Balmer sees all the Vista machines downgraded to XP for what they really are, an opportunity for double dip sales, so profitable they did it twice.

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Acorn founder: SIXTH WAVE of tech will wash away Apple, Intel

jubtastic1
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Terminator

You can call me AI

We don't want or need a true AI, it would be too busy unraveling the universe / looking at flowers / slacking off / exterminating meatbags to be of any use to us, it would be exactly like creating an omnipotent angsty teenager.

Smart computers on the other hand, that can interpret all the nuances of human communication and register context but don't have their own agenda would be very useful, and who leads the field here? Apple and Google.

We're already over the threshold of the next wave of computing, the incumbents are on the case and unless ARM smashes into the datacentre to handle the processing they're going to remain as an enabling yet bit part player in the grand scheme of things.

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Windows 8 'sales' barely half as good as Microsoft claims

jubtastic1
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WTF?

Competing with themselves

Do they give win7 away for free or does selling a win8 licence with downgrade rights actually make MS more money than if win8 was popular?

Because if its the latter then I can totally understand why every other release sucks balls.

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Apple wins documents fight with Google in Samsung case

jubtastic1
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Stop

Re: No, No, No, No, No...

Not really no, There were loads of Indexes, like Internet yellow pages and of course there were some search engines that grew out of them but basically, they returned poor results, liberally chummed with paid placement and surrounded by a sea of 'portal' crap.

When Google appeared they didn't even have a business model so there was no adverts. it was more than just a breath of fresh air,the reason it ended up dominating was that it was a search engine that actually worked.

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New 'BLOCKBUSTER' APPLE iTHING imminent - billionaire Einhorn

jubtastic1
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Re: Maybe they are relaunching Pippin...

Many a thing said in jest etc.

Reminds me of back before they showed the iPhone and pundits were knocking up all sorts of mad looking designs like iPod phones with rotary dials on the click wheel and CrazyAppleRumours said 'It will only have one button', because it was the most unlikely thing they could think of.

Anyway, the point is, gaming is a big deal for Apple these days, wouldn't surprise me to see AppleTV (or iTV if that ever happens), expanding it's role to include a cheap gaming hub.

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BitTorrent goes straight (to email hell) with 'Bundles'

jubtastic1
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Meh

It looks like an old school multimedia thingy

Like they used to distribute on CD's with magazines, can't remember the proper term for them but they were supposed to be the future of books etc.

I think something integrated into the protocol, a distributed store, hosted by the fans themselves, something that evolves and improves over time could work for some artists, but this isn't that, this is just a multimedia bundle you download like any other file, except with locked content, it's going to struggle to compete with free and unlocked.

Here's a concept for a bittorent music store, dedicated client app, 50p a track, but you gain credit for seeding, replace Apple, Google & Amazon hosting with fan hosting and redistribute the 30% cut those entities take back to the fans. The store itself and the artists content you've bought are synced through BT so you get new content delivered that otherwise you'd have to hunt for. Literally get the fans involved and reward them for it with exclusives and first peeks etc.

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Self-assembling robot inches towards WORLD DOMINATION

jubtastic1
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Disposable UAV

Is the only real use of a pack flat self assembling robot I can think of, so I guess they'll do fine.

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TV gesture patent bombshell: El Reg punts tech into public domain

jubtastic1
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Happy

Some more gestures

Hand cupped behind ear - make it 1 louder.

Hands over ears - turn it down son.

Index finger anticlockwise - rewind my selector.

Index finger clockwise - skip to the end (of the adverts).

Index finger in nostril - Discovery channel.

Salute (UK/USA/Godwin)- History channel

Finger drawn across throat - turn it off.

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Adobe kills Creative Suite – all future features online only

jubtastic1
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FAIL

Hey Adobe

This is to the person(s) employed by Adobe to scrape all the 'feedback' from this announcement.

Keep working on CS7 in the backroom, so that when this subscription only plan doesn't work like you expected it to, you'll be able to say sorry, pop a U turn and get something on the market pronto, because otherwise you're going to get pwned by some 'good enough' alternatives and the days when you used to charge people a 'bargain' $600 to upgrade will be just a memory.

Don't wait too long, you've just chummed the water, sharks will come.

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NORKS powers down whole towns to find pirates

jubtastic1
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Stop

Surely that's untrue?

They don't really power down a town then go door to door to check the contents of DVD players, that would require a registry of government issued DVD players that were specially designed to prevent someone removing the discs and could distinguish between mains power and an appropriate transformer running off some car batteries.

I think it's way more likely that this is simply propaganda, reported as fact in the Nork media to make citizens think twice about buying a cheap DVD from Chinese blokes toting sports bags, probably intended to keep the state owned version of blockbusters in business more than identifying dissidents, i'm pretty sure Mr Kim already knows that they're all dissidents.

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Look ma, no plugins! Streaming web video with just JavaScript

jubtastic1
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Re: Shouldn't that be...

@suricou raven

Can't see that happening for a few reasons, firstly because they would need the entire file to match against and it would be too easy to defeat by splicing copies together at the cutscenes, and secondly because if this takes off it's going to be served from a worldwide CDN and continually adding different noise to each copy as it's served is going to get very expensive very quickly.

It's more likely implemented as a subtle marker containing the entire code at shortish intervals, which would also allow identification of short clips, like someone spltting the content up into 10 min youtube videos for example.

It's also going to be quickly bypassed by the pirates, in much the same way that Time Coded review copies are similarly ID encoded but are all over the download sites regardless.

Some more info about the codec would be nice but I seriously doubt it's competative with H265 if they're comparing it to H264 and it was designed with javascript decomression in mind, I suspect this is going to have less of an impact than the video codec Google opensourced.

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US Ambassador plays Game of Thrones with pirates

jubtastic1
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Thumb Down

Re: I want it NOW!

The thing is, the Internet has expanded social groups across borders, so people are more likely to hear their friends raving about something that turns out to be blocked or unavailable for them.

None of this region locking makes sense to the average person, It's long out of touch with the real world and feels like an old redundant thing that's going to be gone before long anyway, so it's easy to rationalise just downloading stuff while it's still relevant rather than waiting until the businesses involved get a clue.

Also £2.99 an episode is way too much, It needs to be cheap enough that people don't question the cost, like the 99c / 69p level for apps and music. iTunes / Amazon / Play downloads aren't competing with physical media, they're competing with free downloads, the price, quality and convenience need to reflect that reality.

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Barnes & Noble bungs Raspberry Pi-priced Nook on shelves

jubtastic1
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Windows

Re: Lifetime ban

Won't be so funny later when they're the only shop still in business.

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Apple to end support for original iPhone: report

jubtastic1
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Happy

Still got mine

My three year old plays with it, runs Jetpack Joyride & temple run just fine and he's pretty damn good at it.

Agree with the comments about support ending years ago though, no idea what part of it is still under support until June.

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Apple's next OS X said to be targeted at 'power users'

jubtastic1
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Meh

Skeuomorphism

Someone did a good write up on this, don't have a link handy but the gist was that skeuomorphism isn't a bad thing, it's actually a pretty neccessary thing, checkboxes and radio buttons are skeuomorphic, there's no reason a checkbox on the internet needs to look like a checkbox from a physical paper form other than to instantly convey it's meaning, remove all traces of skeuomorphism and you'll end up with an abstract mess of a UI.

So the problem with some of Apple's recent apps isn't skeuomorphism per se, but rather one of seriously cheesy design work.

Personally I can't wait to see what Ive does with software, I'm not expecting him to simply throw out all the CSS files though.

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Serial killer hack threat to gas pipes, traffic lights, power plants

jubtastic1
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FAIL

Tip of the iceberg

These systems will be the battlefields of the next war, which will be unique in that it will be difficult* to positively identify the combitant countries and because of the level of civillian casualties and economic damage.

All because properly securing systems is seen as an unwarranted cost by too many vendors.

And we haven't even started rolling out IP6 and the 'Internet of things' yet, we have the 'oppurtunity' to make this a much larger problem before kick off.

*Nationstates aren't going to launch an attack from their own IP block, they're going to launch it from exploited machines in the target Nation and route the commands through a crapload of compromised machines in other 'usual suspect' nationstates, including their own. The global Internet links will be physically disabled pretty quickly once things kick off.

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