* Posts by Ben Holmes

257 publicly visible posts • joined 17 Jul 2007

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Apple designer Sir Jony Ive holding up iOS 7 development: Report

Ben Holmes
Unhappy

Re: That bloody bookshelf

Or, you know, let ME kill it.

I wouldn't even mind if it it reappeared after each OS update, as long as I could delete it. Same with the 'default' apps iOS ships with these days which you can't get rid of.

UK.gov's love affair with ID cards: Curse or farce?

Ben Holmes
Trollface

Re: middle class business men

In my experience, the middle class business men are just a better-dressed classed of criminal.

Quid-a-day nosh challenge hack forms foraging party

Ben Holmes

Re: Fauna?

Ahh yes. The anti-Springer. Forgot about them.

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: Fauna?

Completely and utterly OT...but I wasn't aware there was any other kind of Spaniel than a rampant one...

PEAK iPHONE? Apple mobe growth slumps to ‘lowest in its history’

Ben Holmes
Meh

Neil Mawston is clearly a pillock

What Apple actually need to do, IMHO, as actually release a product that's actually an innovative repackaging of an existing concept again. The iPhone? Not the first smartphone. But well designed, well marketed, and ultimately desirable. Same for the iPad.

Or, you know, they could release something that is genuinely innovative. I fear they're going to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory if this trend of incremental upgrade bullshit that they peddled out between iPhones 4, 4S and 5 continues. And that won't be good for anyone. Not even the 'droids. Because as the Android dominance continues, manufacturers will get lazy. It happened with Microsoft and Windows. it will happen again with the Android peddlers. We need competition to keep the market fresh.

And would it kill Apple to give iOS a facelift? Seriously?

But then, what do I know? I'm not a Strategy Analytics analyst. I'm just a consumer who knows what he wants.

Master Beats: Why doesn't audio quality matter these days?

Ben Holmes
Happy

Fuck yeah!

Reef!

Excuse me whilst I go and dig out Getaway.

COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO: NASA rovers scrawl giant willy on Mars

Ben Holmes
Meh

Re: Huuuuulaaaaa!

Well, shit. Now anytime I read about a Mars Rover, it'll be in the voice of Inspector Grimm.

The Reg puts Vulture inside the Large Hadron Collider

Ben Holmes
Happy

...in base 13.

Pervert.

Manual override: Raspberry Pi beginners' books

Ben Holmes
Happy

Heh

"a short while ago I decided it was time I ought to try it out and see what the diminutive, Linux-running micro can do."

Run RISC OS really really well.

Is UK web speech regulated? No.10: Er. We’ll get back to you

Ben Holmes
FAIL

Re: Oh dear. Here we go again.

Yes, we all saw how well those anti-terror laws worked out for Paul Chambers, didn't we? Common sense prevailed in the end but my god he had to work for it.

FWIW, I don't condone what he said - it was a stupid, crass, knee-jerk comment. But he didn't deserve the stupidity shitstorm which landed on him as a result.

Ben Holmes
Meh

Re: Pile of c**p being disseminated by the media

I am baffled why you have been downvoted for this, Chris. It is exactly the case that a few individuals have ruined the existing status quo for the vast majority of sensible, law-abiding publications whether big or small.

The real question is why these select few publications got away with it for so long. The answer to that question has never been 'lack of legislation' - moreover the existing legislation has not been applied. And that is the biggest WTF about the whole sordid affair.

Apple tears itself away from iThings to squash Mac OS X bugs

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: the imac audio stutter fix is long overdue

Ooh very nice. I started out with the Edirol UA-5, which was a brilliantly solid bit of kit, although a bit on the small scale. Work with a M-Audio Fast Track Uktra these days - although it certainly lacks the joyful robustness of the Edirol kit!

P.s. silly Core Audio...

Ben Holmes
Meh

Re: the imac audio stutter fix is long overdue

If you're a music producer, then surely you have some sort of epic external sound card to handle all that pesky audio processing. Or was this a bug in CoreAudio?

Ten serious sci-fi films for the sentient fan

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

Any love...

...for "2010: The Year We Made Contact"?

I found it a quite enjoyable watch.

Ben Holmes
Happy

You utter shit, Graham. I'm now going to have to go home, dig out my DVD of 2001, and try to find the bloody helicopter blades.

Ben Holmes
Coat

I'd err, think about finding the exit Tim. Here, take your coat. You'll need it.

Amazon yanks SimCity download from store

Ben Holmes
Stop

@OliverJ

I think this is the point. Client-Server works exceptionally well as a business model when:

A) The application is a distributed business app, possibly bespoke, serving a specific set of needs.

B) Is not architected, developed, and deployed by a bunch of numpties.

C) Is not a 'single player game'.

I think C is the most important point here. There is absolutely zero need for something that is ostensibly a single player game with a multi-player element (which you're not even forced to look at) to be using such an architecture. EA / Maxis say that this thing is about the epic number crunching the servers do in the background. Bullshit. If the average home PC these days is capable of searching the night sky for habitable planets in it's spare time, then it can cope with some complex number crunching. That's why we have multi-core architectures. that's why we have bucketloads of RAM.

If this was about DRM, then what the hell is the point in Origin? This is about control, and built in obsolescence.

For the record, I was absolutely 100% going to go out and buy this, because I love SimCity. Happily, I didn't pre-order, so will be voting with my wallet.

Red Hat tempts devs with OpenShift Origin upgrades

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

Good stuff

I've been using it for a little while, and I really like OpenShift. It's really simplified a lot of the bread and butter work that goes into deploying applications in stable, scalable, and above all, maintainable manner. I'm only using it for personal projects at the moment, but I can see how it would be really useful for all types of projects, ranging from the personal like mine, right up to the enterprise level.

Big thumbs up.

SpaceX Dragon eventually snared by ISS

Ben Holmes
Mushroom

Re: Sodding great red dragon

As a nation, we take pride in our subtlety and tact...

It's the Peer 2.0: Martha Lane Fox now a crossbench baroness

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: Baroness Dotcom?

...in a dress.

Ubuntu? Fedora? Mint? Debian? We'll find you the right Linux to swallow

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

@Chemist

And THAT'S the problem. It might not be the case any more, and as a Mint user, I wholeheartedly agree that using the terminal can improve your experience. But the perception amongst the wider user community (i.e. Not Linux Users) is that Linux is still defined by the terminal, and that's an obstacle that the Linux community isn't really helping to overcome.

Honestly I think at this stage Canonical need to start running TV ads or something, and make this point in big shiny capital letters. Because Ubuntu is the closest thing we have to a household name at this point.

Tracy brothers are back: Thunderbirds Are Go! again in 5... 4... 3...

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

Re: F**** Yeah!

I DID enjoy Team America...

Ben Holmes
Meh

I can't be the only person who would love to see a 'proper' adult version of Thunderbirds made. In the sense that it would be Christopher Nolan's 'Batman Begins' to the camp antics of the original Batman TV series. I'd watch that.

None of this 'appealing to children' rubbish. Give me a decent film, and please, try not to fsck it up.

Chinese Apple pirate Kuaiyong sets sail for rest of WORLD

Ben Holmes
Meh

The Chinese just don't give a fuck really, do they?

Intellectual Property and Copyright just seem to be 'something which other people should be concerned about'.

Apple releases iOS 6.1, adds LTE carriers, tweaks security

Ben Holmes
Happy

1996 Ford Escort Masquerade.

Yes, it was an Orion, but it had a poncy name, so that made it OK right?

Right?

Star Trek saviour JJ Abrams joins the dark side: Star Wars VII

Ben Holmes
Happy

@AC Re: If anything fuck5up starwars

How very dare you, sir! RISC OS is a timeless OS - vintage, I tell you! Vintage!

OP's opinions on Disney however, leave a lot to be desired...

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

It can't just be me...

...who is happy that someone is making a mainstream sci-fi film? There are so precious few of them made these days.

I thoroughly enjoyed ST when I was younger, and thought that JJA did the right thing by opening up the franchise to a wider audience. Did it appeal to everyone? No. But it brushed the cobwebs off an otherwise dead franchise, revered only in the minds of an ever-dwindling fanbase. It was fun, it was entertaining, it had the requisite amount of explosions, and it had a half decent plot. Which as far as I'm concerned is all I really need from any film, let alone a ST film.

Let's just hope that JJ can do the same with the piss-poor wreckage of Star Wars that George 'I haven't had a good idea in years' Lucas has left him.

Shiny, shiny! The window's behind me...

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: Everyone off the bus!

"With apologies to Dennis Leary".

Asteroid-mining 'FireFlys' will be ready for action by 2015, vows space firm

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: Go asteroid mining? Really?

PLOT TWIST: Lee Harvey Osmond is actually Prince Charles.

Raytheon to build low-orbit, disposable satellites for DARPA

Ben Holmes
FAIL

Re: "ALASA" is FALCON reborn?

Had to double take reading your comment. Momentarily went full retard and forgot that the Chinese are alledgedly Communists.

The fail is strong in me today.

India gets paranoid about foreign tech

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

"CHAAAAMMPPPIIOOOOOONN! CHHHAAAMMMPPPIIIOOOOOOONN"

</billbailey>

Sheffield ISP: You don't need a whole IPv4 address to yourself, right?

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

As a current PlusNet customer I wholeheartedly concur. A

Potty-mouthed Watson supercomputer needed filth filter

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: Undo the damage?

If only you could do that with small children. Or any children, for that matter.

Google turns off Chinese censorship alert service

Ben Holmes
Joke

Re: "embedding the censorship alert function in the HTML of its home page"

Cut 'n paste, probably.

Microsoft 'surprised' by Google Gmail 'winter cleaning'

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: I don't really see a problem

I don't have anything constructive to add but wow - BadMonkey really hates IMAP.

2012: A generation-spanning year for gaming

Ben Holmes
Happy

I've got £40 pledged IIRC. Part of my motivation for funding it is so when it finally meets it's funding goal, people will stop whinging about Elite 4 being vapourware, and find something else to moan about.

Like Elite 5, for example.

Schmidt 'very proud' of Google's tiny tax bill: 'It's called capitalism'

Ben Holmes
Joke

Re: Good ol' Google

The Greeks can't afford any gifts anyway. The German's won't give them any pocket money.

China plans astro-farms on Mars

Ben Holmes
Happy

Welcome to El Reg.

Oprah Winfrey too late to save Microsoft's Windows 8

Ben Holmes
Unhappy

Re: Windows 8

"You never used Boldon James E-Mail"

I have. Still do, much to my detriment. If you were in any doubt, it's still a sack of shit.

Apple said to have let the name of the next OS X cat out of the bag

Ben Holmes
Thumb Up

Re: I'll switch to OSX

SERPENTINE BABOO! SERPENTINE!!!

Revealed! Prime Minister's iPad 'dashboard' for controlling Britain

Ben Holmes
Happy

The one Force power Vader never had...

(I'm so sorry)

Classic game 'Elite' returns … on Kickstarter

Ben Holmes
Meh

Egosoft

I always thought that the appropriate spiritual successor to the Elite games was Egosoft's 'X' Universe series of games. Fully immersive sandbox epics- Trade, Fight, Build, Think was the tagline - or something similar anyway.

Ahh, happy days, when I had time to spend playing games...

Mmm, what's that smell: Coffee or sweat? How to avoid a crap IT job

Ben Holmes
Meh

Do not be under any illusions that Human Resources departments are ever there for your benefit as Valued Employee. They are there to bend to the will of Senior Management these days.

Fans' loyalty questioned as iPhone popularity plummets

Ben Holmes
Meh

As the owner of a relatively new iPhone 4S, I like my phone. Granted, I don't really want to anything more complicated than send a few text messages, make a few phone calls, and occasionally read a few emails, but what it does, it does well. The hardware is pretty good. Extortionately expensive for what it is, but pretty good.

But what really pains me about the whole Apple / iOS 'experience', is iOS itself. The bloody thing looks basically the same as it did 6 iterations ago. OK, the corners of the icons are probably slightly more round, but fundamentally nothing much has changed. In my eyes, it's like firing up a brand-spranking new laptop with the most powerful internals around, and finding its running Windows 3.1. Compare it with 6 iterations of Mac OS X and it's obvious where the development efforts have been.

Please Apple, go away and have a play with iOS. Make it look and feel a little less 2007, and then come back to us.

Vote NOW for the vilest Bond villain

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: Obviously

Zing.

Red Hat stalks VMware in field sport ambush

Ben Holmes
Happy

It's nice to see Red Hat going for the subtle approach.

Red Hat launches community contest to rename JBoss

Ben Holmes
Happy

I'll just leave this here...

These are the Cubans, baby. This is the Cohibas, the Montecristos. This is a kinetic-kill, side-winder vehicle with a secondary cyclotrimethylenetrinitramine RDX burst. It's capable of busting a bunker under the bunker you just busted. If it were any smarter, it'd write a book, a book that would make Ulysses look like it was written in crayon. It would read it to you. This is my Eiffel Tower. This is my Rachmaninoff's Third. My Pieta. It's completely elegant, it's bafflingly beautiful, and it's capable of reducing the population of any standing structure to zero. I call it "The Ex-Wife."

Tim Cook: 'So sorry for Apple's crap maps app - try Bing or Nokia'

Ben Holmes
Happy

Ahahahahaha

That is all.

Sent from my iPhone

Apple's brilliant plan to fix iOS Maps: Get YOU to do it

Ben Holmes
Happy

Re: iOS 6 Maps - Cloud Based Satellite Imagery

I smell a 'Maps Apologist'...

Opportunity finds new patch of 'berries' on Mars

Ben Holmes
Unhappy

Re: Get your Martian Blueberry Jam right here!!!!

It depends on whether you can get it to stay onna stick.

Oh for...I've been reading Terry Pratchett for years, and I've just got that.

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