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* Posts by g e

2785 posts • joined 16 Jul 2007

US forced to redesign secret weapon after cyber breach

g e
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Bernard Manning!

Blimey, was it his mother-in-law?

Take my wife... etc, etc

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g e
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Poor UK & USA

Because these kind of nefarious activities are not the sort of thing we'd ever to to anyone. Oh no.

Need a hypocrite tag... Rupert Murdoch or Rebekah Brooks, anyone?

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Romanian NASA hacker fights 'inflated' damage assessment

g e
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FAIL

Sounds more like

Oh shit we're so embarrassed about having our lame security discovered.

I know, let's be spiteful to the guy.

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W3C moves to snuff Apple web patents

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Stop

Sad stuff

Crapple are such a toxic force in innovation these days.

I hope the W3C come up with some method of meaning HTML5 compliance is somehow implicity licensed until explicitly revoked then Jobs' company can be kicked back to the internet stoneage overnight at will if they want a pissing match.

It's one thing actively trying to block innovation in competitor companies by sueing instead of couter-innovating but potentially fucking up shit for everyone is real News International popularity territory.

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GCHQ losing its 'internet whizzes' to Microsoft, Google

g e
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Joke

Labour's Interception Modernisation Programme

LIMP

That is all

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Apple's chief patent lawyer exits, says report

g e
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Gimp

Actually

I should imagine his detailed knowledge of crapple's patent litigation policies/tactics/gameplans would make him a superb catch for Samsung, Nokia, MS, Google, etc...

Gimp cos well... apple.

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Apple flings patent lawsuit at HTC (again)

g e
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Good for HTC

That crapple consider them such a serious threat to their business that they're willing to go to these lengths

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Apple orders millions of iPhone 5s for September release

g e
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True enough but

In a year and a half you should be due an upgrade....

If you organised your phone contracts right (wifey does ours, sticks it to Voda every 18 months for top-line phones)

:o)

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g e
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Stop

However

1. 'Not iphone' is a huge advantage as you can move brands but retain the OS and your apps

2. see 1

3. Meh

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EU cloud data can be secretly accessed by US authorities

g e
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And we're surprised how?

Store your shit on a Yank server and expect to lose even the veneer of privacy.

Surely everyone's known this for years?

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Apple v Samsung: Jobs strikes back

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Facepalm

We'll soon know

If Stevie-boy's dad's bigger than Samsung's dad

I bet Steve's dad, regardless of bigness, doesn't do Sam Sung Foo though....

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El Reg cuts ribbon on new Special Projects Bureau

g e
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Go

Low Orbit Holistic Astro Navigator

L.O.H.A.N

Which must navigate by the stars to a pre-ordained destination to blow shit up in a funky (yet holistic) manner

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Bloke ordered to remove offensive numberplate

g e
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Happy

Bumper stickers

THIS VEHICLE IS RESTRICTED TO 155MPH

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Google bolsters monopoly defence

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Microsoft should know

They nicked Google's results, didn't they?

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Freedoms Bill: Gov may U-turn on personal data and DNA retention

g e
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Sounds like

The ACPO have been taking people out to dinner again...

Power-crazed lunatics.

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Eco investors demand (even) more sweeteners for low carbon energy

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Mushroom

Why is exactly why no-one believes ecotards any more

It's the same old politically correct claptrap wrapped around a cash grab.

Fuck off and get a business model you greedy self-centered hypocrites

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DRM-free music dream haunts Apple's app-store lock-in

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FAIL

Platform fail

Surely if you'd not bought into Apple and gone Android earlier you'd actually have the choice of a good number of different devices to run your Android apps on?

I'd expect to be able to retrieve my paid-for Android apps for reinstallation if I changed from my HTC to a Samsung, though admittedly haven't had to try it yet.

You just bought into a (more) locked-down closed platform.

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g e
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Not all free

But many very good ones are, yes.

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BT wary of rights holders' site-blocking proposal

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Yawn

Or maybe uk.gov could grow some and suggest the content industry joins its customers in the 3rd millennium.

Like that's never been mentioned before anywhere ever.

ZZzz.. indeed.

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US plan to hold EU passenger data for 15 yrs 'unlawful'

g e
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And then

They'll immediately ban EU flights into the USA costing EU airlines a shitload of money and EU companies too.

Then they'll have to give in and allow the data so flights can resume and demand equally silly quid pro quo stuff.

Don't buy from US companies (Kraft, Apple, MuckDonalds, MS, etc). Then EU companies have less reason to deal with the USA, meaning flights to the USA become less important and tourists will always find somewhere else to fly to... Yeah some stuff is really US-only like CPU's but you can always buy a SONY or Samsung laptop to keep it in, HTC / LG instead of Apple or Motorola, etc...

The yanks.gov will do whatever they want regardless but consumers don't have to help fund their economy.

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Plods roll out new Police National Database

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Alien

An intelligence-sharing tool

Allowing the meagre brainpower of several stupid coppers to be combined into one reasonably clever one.

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Oracle's Android claims slashed by US patent authorities

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Joke

Indeedy

A complete FiaSCO, in fact.

I used to have a stapler somewhere made by RapeSCO, how portentous that was...

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Apple will 'own games industry'

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WTF?

At this trajectory

Surely they'll just hit the tempered glass ceiling they never foresaw even harder.

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Nano-materials could recharge phones from keyboard taps

g e
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Nice. But...

Modern touch phones don't have keyboards (bar a handful of models)

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Norwegian diplomats brush up on black metal

g e
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Devil

I, FOR ONE

Welcome our new rocking satanic overlords

(And, while not Norwegian or Black, I can heartily recommendations the musical meanderings of Finntroll and their Death Metal Oompah tunes)

Satan. Natch.

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Has UK gov lost the census to Lulzsec?

g e
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Yeah but

That damned census had a lot of invasive questions on it.

It actually read more like a benefit application form.

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g e
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Childcatcher

Typical, you're probably right, too.

Don't fix the problem, fix the likelihood of someone else discovering it.

Gubbernment at its most gubbern-mental

Think of the children, of course, educate them to distrust the lot of 'em.

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g e
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Strong government intervention?

They're the cretins that created the circumstances that allowed this.

An angry mob would be a far better intervention...

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Bitcoin collapses on malicious trade

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Black Helicopters

So, if you were a government

... and you wanted to destroy confidence in a new currency you couldn't control or track,

What might you have your Super Sneaky Agency of Freedom Management do?

Yes. Black helicopters. Damned right.

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Got a website? Pay attention, Cookie Law will come

g e
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perhaps a UX like this might work?

is session active?

yes --- continue as normal

no --- redirect below

.

.

Ask user if they want a cookie

yes -- continue as normal

no -- redirect below

.

.

Present info to user that they are not allowed to continue using your wesbite as it needs a cookie setting which they have refused. Present a form inviting them to vent their spleen at beaurocracy@eu.gov.

Just need to get an email addy out of the beauro's that people can vent to...

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g e
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So does that mean -

That Google analytics code will have to pop up cookies on your behalf?

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Brit CompSci student faces extradition to US over link site

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Trollface

Cos

Since the USA took the opportunity to fuck us with a 'special relationship' as wages when we *hired* them for WWII they've been sticking it to us financially ever since.

Hence it's probably 'extradite or lose this investment in the UK' which is the usual tune they play.

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g e
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Yeah maybe

BUT STILL IN THE COUNTRY OF RESIDENCE ONLY

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g e
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Seconded

RIGHT OFF

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Meerkats face financial regulation

g e
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Which is why

I put an old YAC number which goes only to voicemail as my contact no.

Surprisignly I never get any emails recordings from it. Shame. Not.

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Woman puts shout-out for hitman on Facebook

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Facepalm

What a pair of utter morons

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

That is all.

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HTC U-turns over Desire Android 2.3 update

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Bonus.

I bought my Desire HD for the spec at the time. An update is bonus++ as far as I'm concerned!

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Go Daddy sued over email alerts

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more prior art

I have shareit automated payment reports in my inbox from 1999 and I'm damned sure they were doing it in 1998, too...

In fact I almost certainly have domain renewal reminders from before then too. In fact most of the world must have.

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Earth may be headed into a mini Ice Age within a decade

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Holmes

That's because

The starving people die and the landwhales just place a burden on the health sector that sustains their lumpen lives.

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Google Instant Pages: Search sites rendered before you click

g e
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Errrrrm

This sounds like it's going to muller some folks' site stats...?

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World's biggest ad agency keelhauls 2000 'pirate' sites

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Holmes

Follow the money

If they or their clients were making money from those ads they'd not pull them.

Most visitors to those sites likely have AdBlock+ installed so the ads never get viewed/served. They're just spinning it as an anti-piracy move when in reality they're cutting deadwood.

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No Gingerbread snack for Desire owners, says HTC

g e
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Go

Not fussed

My Desire HD is a great phone. I bought it because of the spec at the time, not for some mythical upgrade it might one day receive.

An upgrade to Gbread might have been nice but it certainly doesn't ruin the device for me by any stretch of the imagination.

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Creationists are infiltrating US geology circles

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Facepalm

Floods

Ah but wasn't there a huuuuuuuge thing of water towards the end of the ice age when that Canadian glacier thingy bust loose?

There are some watery incidents in the dim past of mankind upon which I'm quite happy to believe some very backwards & superstitious ancient humans would attribute to a deity cos of their sheer magnitude.

Do remember though, these are still the ramblings/race memories and interpretations of an extremely primitive civilisation all the same.

Exactly the same primitive civilisations that thought Gods and stuff lived in the sky.

Oh. Hang on....

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g e
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Blame transferance

When you can't sue to defer blame for your own shortcomings why, it must be a deity....

Is just a mental crutch for a shedload of people who don't want to think they might be responsible for their own lives and issues.

God's Will my arse. It's your own damned failure to try & take charge of your own miserable existence.

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Anonymous vows to attack Federal Reserve

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Childcatcher

Personally...

I prefer to try & discern The Rules of The Game and use The Rules to improve the lot of myself and nearest/dearest. It's kinda like a Getting Ahead Challenge thing.

But you're not wrong.

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g e
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Big Brother

Actually yes

They did do an astonishing job and they achieved many of their goals.

You're making the understandable mistake of thinking their interests coincide with yours/ours.

Goldman Sachs, Citibank, etc being prime examples.

Another example (more of a pattern actually).. US 'business' invests heavily in poorer country (Taiwan, Korea, etc, etc). Country's economy goes titsup. IMF steps in and gives country money. Money given pays the businesses (USA) debts. Country collapses. USA gets richer by effectively loan-sharking a poorer country. Which is now utterly in hock the The West.

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LulzSec hacks US Senate

g e
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So if an American hacker hacks US.gov....

>snip<

'bout time they had theirselfs another civil war, YEEHAAA!

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Site appeals feds' unprecedented domain seizure

g e
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In a terse response, the Whitehouse replied

We're the USA.

Fuck you.

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Dam Busters dog dubbed 'Digger'

g e
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I heard that

Barnes Wallace is the be renamed Brian Goldberg in the movie...

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Microsoft squeaks on Google Nortel sale

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I should think

that it would be incumbent on the Nortel purchaser to honour existing licensing agreements...

Otherwise I could buy MS tomorrow (in theory) and immediately invalidate everyone's Windows/Office licenses and demand more payment.

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