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* Posts by g e

2768 posts • joined 16 Jul 2007

As iPhone 4S battery suckage spreads, fixes appear

g e
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FAIL

I do hereby move

That Fanbois should be renamed FailBois

Cos every Apple update so far seems to have contained a fuckup-101 which, considering they have total control of the hardware should never happen.

Fail. Boys. (or 'Still Amateurs', your choice)

/nuff

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Apple gets patent for ‘unlock gesture’

g e
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Seriously. WTF?

This passed the 'is not utterly fucking obvious' test???

The sooner USPTO causes the US Economy to collapse under its own stupidity the better.

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Jobs: 'I'll spend my dying breath destroying Android'

g e
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He was

By the sound of it

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Zuckerberg's HTML5 Trojan horse play

g e
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FAIL

Facebook. Mobile. SHIT NO

I killed Farcebook running on my HTC Desire and reverted al its updates and wiped its data and cache. Why?

Because every time I use it the serially untrustworthy social network causes the GPS icon to come up on my phone.

Thank you for showing me Android. Fuck you, Facebook for doing it without asking me first, every single time.

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Android grabs quarter of tablet market

g e
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Happy

30% less share eh?

Maybe it *is* cheaper to use lawsuits to damage other companies' business after all.

Unless they backfire on you, at least.

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Ballmer disses Android as cheap and complex

g e
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Meh

That's rich

Coming from Steve Ballmer, the only thing in the universe currently able to do more damage to Microsoft Corp than Windows Vista.

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Seattle superhero arrested for assault

g e
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Exactly

Is there a superhero called Darwin..?

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g e
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Oh stop it puhleeeeas

You're all going off at a tangent

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Gay-bashing cult plans picket of Steve Jobs funeral

g e
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FAIL

In other, less reported news....

The WBC loons forgot to point out that God Hates Haters too...

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Intellectual Ventures wages patent war on Motorola

g e
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FAIL

FFS, WTF?

The US patent system is so broken that it's actually a startup business model now?

&^$%&*^%*"&%" !!!!

Because there really are no expletives currently robust enough in the English language.

Maybe 'Patent Troll' itself should become the world's rudest insult, akin to 'Belgium in the Hitchhiker's Guide.

But then, what would you call a patent troll...? A *&%$&^%$&*"%, presumably!

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Samsung and Google's next Nexus specs leak

g e
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Go buy a camera instead

Unless you think you should be able to make phone calls from a Canon D5 maybe

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Sony: all new PS3 titles will require PSN Pass for online play

g e
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But

They do have the right to restrict access to their gaming network however they see fit :o/

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Innovatio targets Wi-Fi users with patent suits

g e
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Stop

Hang on though

If they're charging, say, 3k per site and Marriott have 100 sites.. I'd think 300k would be worth making a call to the legal dept before stumping up a cheque...

It only take Marriott & Holiday Inn, et al to have a word with each other and split costs for further savings, too...

These trolls are fkd... if not they should be. With something rusty.

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Life-size Lego assault rifle really works

g e
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Bricks of War

Can't help thinking that would have been better :o)

Top banana all the same!

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Pandemonium as Microsoft AV nukes Chrome browser

g e
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Happy

A Mistake My Arse

No, I don't mean my arse is a mistake I mean

Ohhh you bloody well know what I mean :oD

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007's car outdrives iPhone in battle of the brands

g e
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Congratulations! You have a choice of prizes!

You're a winner!

You may choose from :

An Aston Martin

An iphone

Seriously, what moron would pick the poxy phone.

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g e
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Thumb Up

Gallardo? You JEST, Sir!

Sesto - Flippin' Elemento, mate, all the way! :oD (Should that be Sesto EloMental ?)

http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=sesto+elemento&hl=en&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=sqyFTtaTMMeFhQeB4dXVDA&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&ved=0CBcQ_AUoAQ&biw=1680&bih=938

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iPhone 5 to support 21Mb/s HSPA+ not LTE

g e
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They'll leave LTE out

Cos they need something to put in the iphony 6 so all the OCD upgraders will buy it

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Boffins prove Queen ballad 'world's most catchy song'

g e
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El Condor Pasa?

Iiiiiii'd rather be a sparrow than a snaaaiiiiilll

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T-Mobile: Samsung ban really not in the public interest

g e
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What about?

Do T-Mobile or Verizon currently provide iThings in Americaland?

What a serendipitous time to re-think that. Worldwide, even.

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Android outsells Apple 2:1

g e
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It certainly does

and VHS also outsold Betamax

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World takes notice as SSL-chewing BEAST is unleashed

g e
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WTF?

So in other words...

"a patch introduced by OpenSSL in 2002 to fix this very vulnerability was turned off because it introduced incompatibilities in software from Microsoft."

"This vuln should have been closed 9 years ago but wasn't because M$ couldn't fix their shit"?

Really????? Not that I'm surprised, mind you, but a public apology from Microsoft would still be nice, just because they'd hate to have to make it.

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45% of Android users to upgrade to rival phone OSes

g e
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Two reasons I went Android

1. Can buy another handset and all my stuff works so long as it's Android

2. Really don't want to be associated with the demographic that buys apple stuff

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g e
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Walled gardens have no doors

That's not consumer loyalty, it's the pain of moving away from a poor (imho) choice outweighing doing the moving.

There's quite a few appleistas in my current client's co have have looked at my Desire HD and said, hey, actually, that's a pretty nice phone, how well do you get along with it ? And these are gfx designers, hardcore appleistas.

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Who owns 4G mobile technology?

g e
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So how many have Apple yet to sue?

One look at that diagram kinda says 'Sucks to be Apple, next year', seeing as they've pissed off most of those co's already.

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Apple sued for iPhone, iPad chip 'patent rip-off'

g e
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Go

Apple to countersue VIA

Cos their chips are rectangular with ickle roundy corners

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Samsung preps anti-iPhone 5 lawsuit before it's even out

g e
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WTF?

It's actually qute good

It will likely force Apple to reveal design specs to peove (in apple's eyes) that they don't infirnge.

You know how apple hates spec leakge.

Then Samsung will probably wave some wireless patent at apple and tell them to go away and either write a very big cheque or stop making stuff that infringes their patents. Which is anything but a desktop computer and maybe the laptops.

Do you really think people like Samsung don't think sh*t through first or is that the best YOU could come up with ?

If anyone's been a bit hard of thinking it would seem (currently) to be apple themselves for thinking these tech giants would roll over on their say-so.

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g e
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Almost

I think the phrase is 'countersuing' .. e.g. Apple started it.

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Irishman's coke-packed abdomen poses for police

g e
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P. B. O'B. surely?

Paddy Brendan O'Brien ?

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Hunt: We'll slightly inconvenience pirate sites

g e
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Coat

Piracy

Don't you have to profit from it to be a Pirate?

In fact isn't it not-illegal to just download something (and not redistribute it)?

Yeah, old point, I know... coat grabbed

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g e
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FAIL

A pot meets kettle moment

"The copyright-holders argue that the law hasn't kept pace with technology"

*ahem* outdated business model *ahem*

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Laptop batteries made of jelly invented

g e
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Good job they don't use gelatin

or they'd have to make a vegetarian version...

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Righthaven may have to file for bankruptcy

g e
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Happy

Wronghaven

Good. Another complete shower that can fuck right off.

Shame they can't take the MAFIAA with them.

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iCloud Communications ditches Apple lawsuit

g e
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WONNNNNGAAAAA!

UK readers got the image of that unlovely fat bloke from the %4000+ APR advert, now? Good ;o)

Still a payday is a payday and is likely a small bill for Apple compared to whatever paywalled-garden-ness apple want to build into their MicrosoftCloud.

And probably a result for icloud, to be honest.

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Shareholder demands RIM sell itself or spin off patents

g e
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The value of your investment may go up or down

The jerk's investment is underperforming. Unlucky.

I'm sure RIM are doing what they can to survive, this guy just wants to blame RIM instead of himself for making what turned out to be a shonky investment

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E-cars: unaffordable until 2030 (or later)

g e
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Facepalm

Yeah but

They have to base their analysis on currently available technology and what improvements can be reasonably expected in it over the time frame.

It'd be more irresponsible to say that in five years' time there will be commercially available teleporting units available worldwide powered by residual energy from a star in a nearby parallel dimension thus solving the energy crisis and transportation issues in a completely free and non-polluting way.

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Plods to get dot-uk takedown powers - without court order

g e
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immediate consumer harm

So.

Big media, then.

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Ohio man cuffed for shagging inflatable pool raft

g e
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That'll be

an Attention Surfeit Disorder then ;o)

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Bury council defends iPads for binmen

g e
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Joke

Or they'll get nicked

Something like...

From: BillTheBinMan@hotmail.com

To: DimCouncilManager@burycc.gov.uk

Sorry boss, it just fell into the crusher, it's really hard to hold with the gloves on.

Binman Bill

Sent from my iPad

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g e
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FAIL

So how much more for the software?

Or do these things come as standard with a Realtime Binman(tm) app with a trendy name like REFUSENIK or something fun & quirky?

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Wikileaked cable: AFACT was MPAA’s cat’s-paw

g e
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Buy your movies and music second hand

Thank you for listening...

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Prototype iPhone 5 lost in bar, right on schedule

g e
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Trollface

Grief as a marketing plan

So, did crapple sue Gizmodo et al last year as part of their marketing plan or did the genuine loss of a phone last year create the idea for a dull marketing yawn this year?

Only one thing remains to be decided.. who is more cynical? Crapple for building in suing and fucking up people into part of their marketing plan to make it look like not-a-marketing-plan or me for thinking they are that cynical (I wouldn't put anything past them)...?

I guess he votes will go fanbois thumbs down, not fanbois thumbs up... as usual. (fandroids? lol)

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Samsung outs MacBook Pro lookalike laptop

g e
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Mushroom

But to be fair

Who really gives a Nun's **** what fucking Apple think.

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g e
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This has caused me to coin a new(?) term...

#GreedFail

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Graphene photocells could mean hyper-speed internet

g e
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i hope the Manchester guys patented this stuff

Seriously.

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US judge: Warrant required to access mobile location data

g e
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And what about

The companies that have been collecting this data on their device users?

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CERN: 'Climate models will need to be substantially revised'

g e
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Absolutely spot on.

Poor grammar? should that have been 'whose' instead of 'who's' ?

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g e
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Mine already is :o)

Good job I don't believe anything spouted by scientists and quango's who's funding & existence tends to rely on spouting it...

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Samsung says Apple lifted iPad from Kubrick's 2001

g e
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Errr but...

Apple don't make the displays, so someone obviously thought of it before them.

Who makes these displays... hang on... Samsung make some of them... oh and Apple use them...

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g e
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I just did.

Sorted.

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